FabSwingers.com forum: On couples party do you find it repulsive some couple prefer looking instead of joining

By *ieutenant OP Man
over a year ago

london

.I was invited to a couple party of recent .The party kick off time 11 pm. Everyone arrived as planned. After chatting to one another without any pressure. As the fun began some couples keep parading themself from room to room watching other's having fun.Some couple didn't like the idea .The party organiser wasn't impressed. .what you do think..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Should have been more selective with who they invited . If they didn't want voyeurustic types they should have said so on the invite .

There are not normally rules insisting on play , and it's common for those who like to put on a show to be watched . But if they are put off by too many watchers I can imagine the party would be a bit of a let down .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hate that when you goto clubs. You pay alot to get in there and then you find its all "voyeurs" You can stay at home and watch porn for free. go out to play. Like the "meet for a coffee"I don't have time for that!"I met to play.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

Flagrante

Everyone has their own way of enjoying themselves...If voyeurism wasn't allowed at this party I guess the organisers should have stated this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate that when you goto clubs. You pay alot to get in there and then you find its all "voyeurs" You can stay at home and watch porn for free. go out to play. Like the "meet for a coffee"I don't have time for that!"I met to play. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perhaps they thought the others were not the type

Remember their is no obligation to play with anyone .

I think it's a bit off that people should assume that they have the right to have everyone at a party or club

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By *ery curious maleMan
over a year ago

Bishop Auckland

I have been to a few parties with a FB and never had a problem like this as I think just about everybody played at some point.

Not really sure you could arrange a party but invite people on the basis that they must play?

I guess if they are on here you could check the veris of people before inviting them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a whole, it doesn't bother us if some prefer watching to getting involved. There is not, and should never be, pressure to play.

If people feel uncomfortable with too many people watching (which I can honestly understand) then I'm not sure clubs/parties without private rooms are really for them.

I do prefer to play in rooms where multiples can play and just a few can watch, but a lot of that is just knowing which are the right clubs for what you are looking for.

-Courtney

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By *ransGuyTV/TS
over a year ago

Cardiff

I went to my first party and didn't even take of my clothes. If I had been invited and it was insisted that I play then I would not have gone at all, but thankfully there was no pressure.

I didn't go to the bedroom to watch though or "paraded" around any where, I just watched a bit of soft playing downstairs and had a lovely chat with a few naked people

If people don't like others watching them then why go to a party? And unless it is stated in the invite that they must, then surely people shouldn't feel pressured into playing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We like being watched, if we play in an open area then it's kind of expected lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We organise party if people who attend and play they do if they don't so be it,it's no a must play site is it preference comfort come into it with some people not just about notches

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds

"We like being watched, if we play in an open area then it's kind of expected lol

We like being watched too - and we wouldn't play with anyone that we didn't find attractive, so it would be natural for us to just watch if no one took our fancy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You think people that go to clubs should be forced to fuck?

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

But what if they just weren't attracted to anyone? Would you play in that situation? I bloody know I wouldn't!

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

Repulsive is an oddly strong term...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone has their own way of enjoying themselves...If voyeurism wasn't allowed at this party I guess the organisers should have stated this."

We are all different & looking for different things to get our Kicks or turn Ons from.

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By *isexmistressWoman
over a year ago

Prestwich

"We like being watched, if we play in an open area then it's kind of expected lol

With such a great attitude,You are welcome @ Mistress Mansions anytime..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But what if they just weren't attracted to anyone? Would you play in that situation? I bloody know I wouldn't!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We like being watched, if we play in an open area then it's kind of expected lol

With such a great attitude,You are welcome @ Mistress Mansions anytime..

Thankyou

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

The words you are using OP, such as "repulsive" and "parading" makes me think you have made your mind up about the situation.

I don't think that there should ever have to be pressure to play, maybe they were new to swinging, or maybe they didn't fancy anyone, or there could be any number of reasons they didn't want to play.

We went to a party once, we had spoken to the hosts a number of times and they had said about how they always had no shows and last minute cancellations. So the day of the party came round, and Mrs' period started. We still wanted to support the party and so went along, but although we were trying to support, in hindsight we probably shouldn't have gone.

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

"The words you are using OP, such as "repulsive" and "parading" makes me think you have made your mind up about the situation.

I don't think that there should ever have to be pressure to play, maybe they were new to swinging, or maybe they didn't fancy anyone, or there could be any number of reasons they didn't want to play.

Especially if we subsequently "repulsed" people. That is never a description anyone would like to be labeled with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I went to my first party and didn't even take of my clothes. If I had been invited and it was insisted that I play then I would not have gone at all, but thankfully there was no pressure.

I didn't go to the bedroom to watch though or "paraded" around any where, I just watched a bit of soft playing downstairs and had a lovely chat with a few naked people

If people don't like others watching them then why go to a party? And unless it is stated in the invite that they must, then surely people shouldn't feel pressured into playing?"

Definitely agree

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

"Repulsive is an oddly strong term..."

this..

and i detect a hint of entitlement bordering on something a bit not nice or acceptable..

i've paid my money i fully expect to get a fuck springs to mind..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you invite people to a party, you cant always know if they are players, there are lots of factors eg are they attracted to anyone, are they new to parties, is it just open play, is it just group play, is there no private areas

most parties I've been to, you will find a mixture of people and some may not want to play and some do, most parties are pretty balanced making an enjoyable night

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't mind people watching as long as they weren't taking photos

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

We have never been to a party where play was compulsory and if it was then we would not go.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Repulsive is an oddly strong term..."

The OP likes dramatic turns of phrase - his threads are always entertaining

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Repulsive is an oddly strong term...

this..

and i detect a hint of entitlement bordering on something a bit not nice or acceptable..

i've paid my money i fully expect to get a fuck springs to mind.."

That's what the private club is for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't mind people watching, I don't mind peipl joining in if invited,, I don't mind pics or any of that,, what gets me is the people that are watching and talking to one another loudly!! Really annoys me that one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Each to their own I suppose . Quite enjoy putting on a show for those not wanting to join in the fun.

Newbies may be less confident to play so prefer to watch, learn and be educated Lol

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By *emon tart Double creamCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

We have been to a party and not played as we didn't feel anyone we were mutually attracted to or ones we liked were otherwise engaged.

We won't play if we didn't feel like we wanted to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

".I was invited to a couple party of recent .The party kick off time 11 pm. Everyone arrived as planned. After chatting to one another without any pressure. As the fun began some couples keep parading themself from room to room watching other's having fun.Some couple didn't like the idea .The party organiser wasn't impressed. .what you do think..

Just checking. So the party organiser wasn't impressed that one of the couples just wanted to watch. Well we often go to clubs and just play together and watch if no one takes our fancy x

Parties and clubs and meets for that matter are not all about the play.

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By *londeandbrownCouple
over a year ago

taunton

You think people that go to clubs should be forced to fuck?

So the OP expects to fuck someone even if they aren't into it. We play with who we want when we want.

Our ticket price us the same as everyone else's unless your a single guy where you pay more.

If the single guys want to fuck so badly why not get a whore?

Meet, pay, fuck.

The rules belong to each individual and their preferences. We don't ever okay with single guys at parties. Couples fems yes. But not single guys.

Our preference they always stand around like lost souls desperately trying to get eye contact.

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By *londeandbrownCouple
over a year ago

taunton

Predictive txt is killing me.

Sorry y'all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't mind people watching, I don't mind peipl joining in if invited,, I don't mind pics or any of that,, what gets me is the people that are watching and talking to one another loudly!! Really annoys me that one

Same here , and the couples room at Chams is the worst place for that

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

"Repulsive is an oddly strong term..."

That was my first thought too. I hate going anywhere where I think I will be forced to do anything - we often don't play, but rarely interested in watching - nothing new to see, to be honest. I have been to one house party and it was quite honestly awful - the people there were not in the slightest bit attractive to me, the hostess was totally smashed and absolutely not my type but assumed I would be into her because I was bi - I have never felt so much pressure in my life. Actually, repulsed wads the word in my head when I left .... with Mr Law not actually believing how it had turned out. We don't go to these parties anymore because of this and prefer to stick to clubs we know where we can chat and see where it goes ...

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By *ieutenant OP Man
over a year ago

london

Ok folks sorry for the choice of words. I do respect people preferences. Again let me debunk (you must play) mandatory theory as suggested by some people.No pressure on couple to take of their clothes..Again some couples didn't like the idea of many people watching them.yes some exhibitionist don't mind. But some do.

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By *reedy_for_funCouple
over a year ago

My House

"Perhaps they thought the others were not the type

Remember their is no obligation to play with anyone .

I think it's a bit off that people should assume that they have the right to have everyone at a party or club "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok folks sorry for the choice of words. I do respect people preferences. Again let me debunk (you must play) mandatory theory as suggested by some people.No pressure on couple to take of their clothes..Again some couples didn't like the idea of many people watching them.yes some exhibitionist don't mind. But some do."

If you don't want people watching then surely you play private

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By *erryPervettoMan
over a year ago

London

"Everyone has their own way of enjoying themselves...If voyeurism wasn't allowed at this party I guess the organisers should have stated this."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is swinging like fight club: If this is your first time at Fuck Club you must Fuck.

Seriously, every thread I see about people being nervous about parties and clubs, being pressured into things they are always reassured that they can chat, join in where and when they feel comfortable, and not everyone plays.

Which is it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is swinging like fight club: If this is your first time at Fuck Club you must Fuck.

Which is it? "

Oh, and repulsive is a fucking strong word to use.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I've never been to a private house party (and would love to go) but I wouldn't expect everyone to be having sex, some might watch, have sex later, etc. I don't see what the issue is. I'm not jumping on the bandwagon here having read the views of others but it's just human nature and part and parcel of swinging. You can like everyone enough to shag them. Expectations......

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Can't

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By *aeriequeenWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

I don't always play because I'm not feeling 100% or I'm not feeling an attraction to anyone. I do get funny looks and am heavily encouraged to join in. I was even called shy last time (I'm not).

I will neither strip not play if I don't want to. I will however chat and enjoy meeting new people like any party.

If people don't like it, they're free not to invite me again!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is swinging like fight club: If this is your first time at Fuck Club you must Fuck.

Which is it? "

I was don't think you should take the OP or his questions or opinions as typical of the swinging community...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can't

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By *ieutenant OP Man
over a year ago

london

It wasn't me having qualm with people watching me. In fact it was the couples complaining that they don't like the idea of too many people watching them as if they are gladiator.secondly no pressure on any couple whatever.

You need to respect others couple's who don't like too many people watching them. The percentage of people playing was less compare to onlookers.

Remember this is couples party.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I went to my first party and didn't even take of my clothes. If I had been invited and it was insisted that I play then I would not have gone at all, but thankfully there was no pressure.

I didn't go to the bedroom to watch though or "paraded" around any where, I just watched a bit of soft playing downstairs and had a lovely chat with a few naked people

If people don't like others watching them then why go to a party? And unless it is stated in the invite that they must, then surely people shouldn't feel pressured into playing?"

This!

I've been to many clubs and parties and always enjoyed them but I'm very fussy who I play with and sometimes I'm just in the mood to socialise rather than play! If I click with a lot of people there then you'll find me in the middle of an orgy! If not then you'll find me in a 1on1 or small group - or just socialising and having an occasional look round!

Those who invite me to parties do so because I'm 'nice' and chatty and I like people - not because they expect me to play with everyone there!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It wasn't me having qualm with people watching me. In fact it was the couples complaining that they don't like the idea of too many people watching them as if they are gladiator.secondly no pressure on any couple whatever.

You need to respect others couple's who don't like too many people watching them. The percentage of people playing was less compare to onlookers.

Remember this is couples party. "

Sounds fair enough. It would be a weird party if 4 people were fucking on a bed and 30 people were just standing watching them.

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By *renaaJirkaCouple
over a year ago

Prague and New York

We do not care if few peoples are looking, but tu manny is to much.

We have been once in club Anaconda in Croatia and there in one moment we were playing with one guy in open playroom and within few minutes 25 peoples fully dressed were looking on us.

That was little to much.

Then we find that in this club couples use private rooms with another one or two couples.

----

In mainland Spain its simmilar if you play before 2 or 3 am when locals start to play.

Once in Ooops in Barcelona there were some 15-20 fully dressed peoples looking on as - because we played around 1.30 am.

In Maspalomas on Canaria its another world...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some parties people will mainly play, some with still obviously watch, all sorts of variations of this dynamic occur.

I would just get on with playing rather than watch the watchers, so to speak. If I was that way inclined. I generally just do as I please at parties, with no bad feedback so far - to my face at least

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By *ieutenant OP Man
over a year ago

london

4 couples playing 10 couples watching. some prudish couples find it very intimidating and off-putting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive had that happen a few times when I've got to clubs. Some people just like to walk round at watch. Don't see the point really, but each to their own I guess.

Claire

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By *lactontogMan
over a year ago

Clacton on Sea

[Removed by poster at 02/10/15 18:56:43]

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By *lactontogMan
over a year ago

Clacton on Sea

Me & Kim rarely play at parties & use them to socialise & find future victims opps! meets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At our parties we had a rule. Everyone joins in but only to the level they wish. But no just watching. This was made clear to everyone before they came.

we have been to far to many parties where at least half never got out of the kitchen. Half of these left never got their clothes off.

We don't do socials. If we want that we go to the pub!

Never had any shortage of people wanting to attend. Lol

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By *umpleteazerWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

I don't mind people watching but they should at least dress down. I get intimidated if there are people fully dressed watching

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same here , and the couples room at Chams is the worst place for that

That's exactly the place I was talking about, really kills the mood, if you wanna chat go to the bar area, simple x

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By *ieutenant OP Man
over a year ago

london

"I don't mind people watching but they should at least dress down. I get intimidated if there are people fully dressed watching"

Exactly. Most couples don't mind people watching at least dress down. Going into the play room fully dress up is a complete turn of for people. Including me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I went to a private party recently, people who did not want to be watched closed the door of the bedroom. The others respected that.

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By *iggles and BeardyCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Never had this problem, but then we live being watched. Would love some couples to join in though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

V here

I love to watch, if left to my own devices I'd probably spend the whole evening socialising because I enjoy the atmosphere of swingers clubs and parties!

I hate being under pressure to play. If I don't want to I won't.

But I would respect other playing couples and move away if they didn't want to be watched.

I learnt that when I pissed a couple off at a party as I continued to chatter while they started fucking.

Ooops

The perils of negotiating swinging etiquette.

Xxx

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

"I don't mind people watching but they should at least dress down. I get intimidated if there are people fully dressed watching

Exactly. Most couples don't mind people watching at least dress down. Going into the play room fully dress up is a complete turn of for people. Including me "

I think guidance for a dress code is fine, but to tell people they have to dress up or dress down? I dislike the implication that there is someone telling me what to do - unless it is a specific event where a type of dressing in required - why do people want to tell others how to behave and what to wears - don't we try to do that with our kids, and fail? Why try it with other adults? I can guarantee it won't work - its nonsense.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

"V here

I love to watch, if left to my own devices I'd probably spend the whole evening socialising because I enjoy the atmosphere of swingers clubs and parties!

I hate being under pressure to play. If I don't want to I won't.

But I would respect other playing couples and move away if they didn't want to be watched.

I learnt that when I pissed a couple off at a party as I continued to chatter while they started fucking.

Ooops

The perils of negotiating swinging etiquette.

Xxx"

That's exactly where I am at - can't actually remember the last time I played at a club (I can, but its not in living memory) .... much prefer socialising, when we get to go anywhere, which is tricky these days with work schedules!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"V here

I love to watch, if left to my own devices I'd probably spend the whole evening socialising because I enjoy the atmosphere of swingers clubs and parties!

I hate being under pressure to play. If I don't want to I won't.

But I would respect other playing couples and move away if they didn't want to be watched.

I learnt that when I pissed a couple off at a party as I continued to chatter while they started fucking.

Ooops

The perils of negotiating swinging etiquette.

Xxx

I saw you guys weren't around at the minute. There's a bi night next Saturday 10th out our way at Swindon Swingers. Too far for you both anyway I guess? Xxxxx

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

"V here

I love to watch, if left to my own devices I'd probably spend the whole evening socialising because I enjoy the atmosphere of swingers clubs and parties!

I hate being under pressure to play. If I don't want to I won't.

But I would respect other playing couples and move away if they didn't want to be watched.

I learnt that when I pissed a couple off at a party as I continued to chatter while they started fucking.

Ooops

The perils of negotiating swinging etiquette.

Xxx

I saw you guys weren't around at the minute. There's a bi night next Saturday 10th out our way at Swindon Swingers. Too far for you both anyway I guess? Xxxxx"

Honestly, I don't do party type events unless I know the people as I feel the pressure is ridiculous. We both have very specific tastes, so its unlikely to suit us, plus Mr is working away until the end of October and my job at the moment - there is no let up (already been up from six doing paperwork after finishing at midnight) - we are aiming for bi kink at the end of the month

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