FabSwingers.com forum: Life lesson for women (beware of rant post about sexist double standards)

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So yesterday i rejoined plenty of fish ... Honestly because i was having a poor me day and thought maybe it was about time i found someone who might want to look after me or cheer me up now and again rather than just have sex ... Basically get my shit together and put some effort in to get some back!

Its a new profile - im window shopping and haven't even really been chatting much let alone been on any dates so i still have my fab profile too

However silly me! I never realised that once you have been on fab your basically tainted goods and how dare you ever think of dating again

(obviously this only applies to girls as the majority of my pof inbox are known fabbers and it seems to be ok for them)

I was made aware of my epic failure by this lovely message:

' poor luck to the guy who finds you on here and thinks your a decent and good girl wanting a relationship when your on fab ... Poor poor guy'

So id like to show my appreciation to this troll for teaching me the error of my ways and giving me 2 very valuable life lessons today:

1. People who want a relationship should not enjoy a sex life when single

2. People who experiment with their sexuality are not decent or good people

Oh and when you read 'people' please substitute this for women - as given this guy obviously had both profiles himself and still seems to think he is a catch, i can only assume if you have a penis you are exempt

Please share with all your single lady friends to make sure we protect these poor poor guys from meeting any of us awesome single girls! They are in grave danger of possibly finding love and an excellent sex life in the same place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He obviously doesn't see himself in the same vein. If he's actually on there looking for a relationship and not just sex.

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

I've had that when I was on pof too and I have to totally agree with what you say

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By *acLe0dMan
over a year ago

Preston

Don't really see why it's anyones buisness which sites people use. At the end of the day what is to say you won't a potential partner on fab vs all the other dating sites.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I would personally not worry about it. A comment like this says an awful lot more about him than it does about you.

Regardless of gender/race/age/sexuality or and other labeling system, you are entitled to live your life however you see fit. As long as you break no laws your own moral standards are nobody else's concern.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hide your profile on POF and contact men yourself.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Goodness me what an arse.

I'm sure if I was a guy on pof and came across a familiar profile I'd more like 'oh that's her off fab, she must be open minded and fun I think I'll contact her'.

Hope you're having a better day today

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Laugh it off. Sounds like a guy who's insecure with a woman having experience.

He'd probably be shit in bed anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What an idiot ! Don't let it get to you; I agree he's probably crap in bed ! Maybe he previously had a profile on here and was unsuccessful! Either way, ignore it !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hes probably one of the guys on here with a one-line profile to the tune of "fancy a shag, I've got a big cock", seventy five assorted pictures of his penis in poses at every complimentary angle known to mankind, and has been on here since the industrial revolution and has yet to get even a social

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never used POF but from what I understand a lot of people use it for casual hook ups. Therefore is there really any difference between pof and fabs?

Ignore him, he is just jealous x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds a bit right. I get told I'm 'damage goods' for being polyamorous.

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By *annooWoman
over a year ago

Hastings

Unfortunately we live in a world and time

Where everyone has an opinion

And speaks it

Me included

I was on pof and never got any where... So I ended up on this site from failed romance attempts

I have been single for 32 years. Yes my entire life. Not through lack of trying to find a nice guy to settle with. So any guy that comes along will see me as damaged goods not just because I'm on fab but for the fact I haven't had a bf....

Id hope a guy would look at it in the sence that id had my play years and experienced sexually what I needed to before I wanted to settle down, and I hope he'd see it that we would have a happy and fulfilling sexual life

Rather than condone me

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

Did you reply to him?

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

[Removed by poster at 01/09/15 14:52:46]

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

What an utter cock womble . If i'd have known about fab when i was a single lady i wouldn't have got into half as much trouble !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it just me or does this type of guy sound like he wants a faithful girlfriend but will fuck about behind her back? I always think this when i hear guys double standards on sex.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Laugh it off. Sounds like a guy who's insecure with a woman having experience.

He'd probably be shit in bed anyway.

90% of me laughed it off ( hopefully shown by the tongue in cheek tone of my OP) but that last little bit of me just wanted to vent

Thanks to anyone who put up with my rant

And on that note who wants a shag with an indecent bad girl haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a complete and utter moron male on here = stud woman = slut never understood that in life

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"And on that note who wants a shag with an indecent bad girl haha

Oh all right then...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a twunt

Ignore the spiteful, tainted piece of pig slop and have fun x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hes probably one of the guys on here with a one-line profile to the tune of "fancy a shag, I've got a big cock", seventy five assorted pictures of his penis in poses at every complimentary angle known to mankind, and has been on here since the industrial revolution and has yet to get even a social

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Look truth be known a lot of people on here are looking for relationships we are all just people but in a way more honest about the thing we find more important in a relationship ,swinging is about couples and they have partners all the single guys and women can do as they please x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He sounds like an arsehole.

Hopefully you meet nicer people in future whether it be on here, pof, or wherever you want to go to meet people

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By *CoastFunMan
over a year ago

Southampron

Firstly the guy is a dick. Secondly he used the word your when it should have been you're, that one grinds at me every time I see that mistake for some reason.

Did you reply?

I've also heard numerous times that POF is more for those who are after casual sex, albeit there will be a few who do think the site is more aimed at dating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP look at this way ~ whilst he's attending to his moralistic horse you can be off having fun with guys who meet your criteria and vice versa.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Must admit I've wondered/worried about this.

You meet a nice girl, somehow+ somewhere - then it comes out in the wash that I've been on a swinger site.

Eek - dunno how well that would go down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Must admit I've wondered/worried about this.

You meet a nice girl, somehow+ somewhere - then it comes out in the wash that I've been on a swinger site.

Eek - dunno how well that would go down.

I solved the problem by dating sexually liberated adults. As a swinger/fetishist I can't see it working any other way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No offence intended, but other than the comedy value of the email (which was good) I'm not sure what you're worried about.

The guy did you a favour by showing you what a jackass he is (now). Imagine if he'd played you along, said all the right things and then shown his true colours when you had feelings for him!

I'm just saying, you dodged a bullet rather than lost anything that would have ever bought you any happiness.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Must admit I've wondered/worried about this.

You meet a nice girl, somehow+ somewhere - then it comes out in the wash that I've been on a swinger site.

Eek - dunno how well that would go down.

I solved the problem by dating sexually liberated adults. As a swinger/fetishist I can't see it working any other way."

I've always had fantasies and am very inclined to agree with your sentiments. It's just less hassle

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No offence intended, but other than the comedy value of the email (which was good) I'm not sure what you're worried about.

The guy did you a favour by showing you what a jackass he is (now). Imagine if he'd played you along, said all the right things and then shown his true colours when you had feelings for him!

I'm just saying, you dodged a bullet rather than lost anything that would have ever bought you any happiness.

None taken ... I just wanted a wee rant really and i agree ... At least i know upfront that hes a total knob

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Firstly the guy is a dick. Secondly he used the word your when it should have been you're, that one grinds at me every time I see that mistake for some reason.

Did you reply? . "

Uh oh that may have been my mistake as i was paraphrasing 2 messages into one rather than copy paste (hangs head in shame

)

Also i did reply just to mention sorry i was not aware single people are not allowed a sex life and people who experiment are no longer decent ... To which he replied point well made then immediately blocked me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I meet a man who wants to settle down I'm going to pretend I spent my years,after leaving my husband,in a convent. I will pretend I don't like sucking his cock,refuse to let him near my arse and only have sex once a month with the lights off. I wonder how long before he turns up on here moaning about his shit sex life,as a married man.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bloody Hell the same shit only on a different site.....!!!

I,d of personally laughed at him for being a dick, and im not taking about his wee cock between his legs.....!!!

Sounds like he has we man syndrom !!!

He,s probably been on the reject list more times than his victorian pee brain can handle.....!!!

Ignore him and be shag happy and proud

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"When I meet a man who wants to settle down I'm going to pretend I spent my years,after leaving my husband,in a convent. I will pretend I don't like sucking his cock,refuse to let him near my arse and only have sex once a month with the lights off. I wonder how long before he turns up on here moaning about his shit sex life,as a married man."

Never mind the husband ... How will you cope between monthly lights off shags ... Better start investing in a duracell savings account now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence intended, but other than the comedy value of the email (which was good) I'm not sure what you're worried about.

The guy did you a favour by showing you what a jackass he is (now). Imagine if he'd played you along, said all the right things and then shown his true colours when you had feelings for him!

I'm just saying, you dodged a bullet rather than lost anything that would have ever bought you any happiness.

None taken ... I just wanted a wee rant really and i agree ... At least i know upfront that hes a total knob

Once upon a time I was a single guy. Finding a partner who wanted to join the lifestyle was incredibly important for me because I tried vanilla and it just doesn't work for me. That's when I realised just how much competition there is for guys to find a wife who wants to swing. In other words, it was very hard due to simple supply and demand.

So based on that experience, I'd be surprised if you didn't have men biting your arm off if you looked for a relationship on here or if you socialised at a club.

Sure you'll get some morons saying "oh fab is just for sex, you're in the wrong place" - but that's what the block button is for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Goodness me what an arse.

I'm sure if I was a guy on pof and came across a familiar profile I'd more like 'oh that's her off fab, she must be open minded and fun I think I'll contact her'.

Hope you're having a better day today

Bang on madam!

Decent blokes would .... This guy's an arse!

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By *lashheartMan
over a year ago

shrewsbury

What a knob head.

I'd rather find a lady on here as a long term partner when the time comes

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"So yesterday i rejoined plenty of fish ... Honestly because i was having a poor me day and thought maybe it was about time i found someone who might want to look after me or cheer me up now and again rather than just have sex ... Basically get my shit together and put some effort in to get some back!

Its a new profile - im window shopping and haven't even really been chatting much let alone been on any dates so i still have my fab profile too

However silly me! I never realised that once you have been on fab your basically tainted goods and how dare you ever think of dating again

(obviously this only applies to girls as the majority of my pof inbox are known fabbers and it seems to be ok for them)

I was made aware of my epic failure by this lovely message:

' poor luck to the guy who finds you on here and thinks your a decent and good girl wanting a relationship when your on fab ... Poor poor guy'

So id like to show my appreciation to this troll for teaching me the error of my ways and giving me 2 very valuable life lessons today:

1. People who want a relationship should not enjoy a sex life when single

2. People who experiment with their sexuality are not decent or good people

Twas ever thus and I'm willing to bet you a sherbert dab that a high percentage of the single men on here feel that way along with a good proportion of the women.

Only when we teach our daughters and our sons that sex is ok and we all have a right to enjoy it will things change.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh oh. Name and shame. Got an instant ban for that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its a new profile - im window shopping and haven't even really been chatting much let alone been on any dates so i still have my fab profile too

However silly me! I never realised that once you have been on fab your basically tainted goods and how dare you ever think of dating again

(obviously this only applies to girls as the majority of my pof inbox are known fabbers and it seems to be ok for them)

I was made aware of my epic failure by this lovely message:

' poor luck to the guy who finds you on here and thinks your a decent and good girl wanting a relationship when your on fab ... Poor poor guy'

So id like to show my appreciation to this troll for teaching me the error of my ways and giving me 2 very valuable life lessons today:

1. People who want a relationship should not enjoy a sex life when single

2. People who experiment with their sexuality are not decent or good people

Yeah I had same problem for admitting being bisexual on pof, yet when I did men still asked me for a quick fuck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm glad I read this thread, I was considering going back on pof to find something more than casual sex but now I don't think I will! Sorry to hear your experience op, sounds like a narrow minded twat, sadly they are everywhere online. Ignore him and have fun

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm glad I read this thread, I was considering going back on pof to find something more than casual sex but now I don't think I will! Sorry to hear your experience op, sounds like a narrow minded twat, sadly they are everywhere online. Ignore him and have fun

I probably get my face out too much in chat so was quite quickly recognised ... if your profile is reasonably annonymous you might be ok ... Good luck wherever you search

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Must admit I've wondered/worried about this.

You meet a nice girl, somehow+ somewhere - then it comes out in the wash that I've been on a swinger site.

Eek - dunno how well that would go down.

I solved the problem by dating sexually liberated adults. As a swinger/fetishist I can't see it working any other way."

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By *eneral HysteriaMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

He's clearly a tool

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

It's a very unpleasant message but I respect his right to make choices.

he could have just moved on

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By *CoastFunMan
over a year ago

Southampron

I probably get my face out too much in chat so was quite quickly recognised ... if your profile is reasonably annonymous you might be ok ... Good luck wherever you search

I don't think being anonymous really matters. I've always told girlfriends about my past experiences swinging. If they don't like it then it's highly unlikely that we'll be compatible sexually. I wouldn't be expecting them to swing with me but if me having those experiences freaked them out then they're probably not for me. I obviously don't spurt it out on the first date but usually by the third. Women are allowed to enjoy sexual experiences just as much as men in my opinion and those men that can't accept that are a tad strange.

As said you've dodged a bullet there OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know you can leave re_iews/veri's on PoF too

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By *irtyandfilthy2014Couple
over a year ago

under the apple tree

We met on pof, and I blurted out all about swinging and being on Fab on the first date with him. Still together 18 months later and very happy. Not all men are as narrow minded as the guy mentioned in the OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My 35 year old male mate is on POF and he finds POF girls even more likely to have sex than Fab girls so those men who think Fab girls are "loose" are deluding themselves. ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest after looking through your profile and pics....any guy would be so lucky to get 2 mins of your time! WOW x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a bit Mr jekyll n hide when I'm on POF...I just wanted you to love me there and shag me here...and was jealous

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My 35 year old male mate is on POF and he finds POF girls even more likely to have sex than Fab girls so those men who think Fab girls are "loose" are deluding themselves. ??"

That's really interesting. I wonder if that's due to how some guys tend to treat women on here.

A lot of men seem to think the women on here are free prostitutes. Yet on POF/ sites like that, I bet the guys do a lot more chatting up and make an effort to *appear* to be respectful. And hence the women react to that differently.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My 35 year old male mate is on POF and he finds POF girls even more likely to have sex than Fab girls so those men who think Fab girls are "loose" are deluding themselves. ??

That's really interesting. I wonder if that's due to how some guys tend to treat women on here.

open your flap..

so I can send this love letter through, and a rose

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By *ighland_RoseCouple
over a year ago

Brigadoon

"My 35 year old male mate is on POF and he finds POF girls even more likely to have sex than Fab girls so those men who think Fab girls are "loose" are deluding themselves. ??

That's really interesting. I wonder if that's due to how some guys tend to treat women on here.

open your flap..

so I can send this love letter through, and a rose"

Thorns removed?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My 35 year old male mate is on POF and he finds POF girls even more likely to have sex than Fab girls so those men who think Fab girls are "loose" are deluding themselves. ??

That's really interesting. I wonder if that's due to how some guys tend to treat women on here.

open your flap..

so I can send this love letter through, and a rose

Thorns removed?"

oh yes..dont want them getting stuck on her rug!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My 35 year old male mate is on POF and he finds POF girls even more likely to have sex than Fab girls so those men who think Fab girls are "loose" are deluding themselves. ??

That's really interesting. I wonder if that's due to how some guys tend to treat women on here.

Not too bad for me on here, not sure if it's coz i haven't really got any graphic pics public but i get nicely chatted up or polite intro messages mostly.

I signed up to a porn 'dating' site this week as well, hardly had anything offensive on there either but people are more likely to send me derogatory messages there, even then it's pretty rare, couple a day at the most so far. It's mostly compliments and nothing to have conversations off though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Was totally impressed bu an actual serious response from paddy ... Then normal business resumed with the rose through the flaps chat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My 35 year old male mate is on POF and he finds POF girls even more likely to have sex than Fab girls so those men who think Fab girls are "loose" are deluding themselves. ??

That's really interesting. I wonder if that's due to how some guys tend to treat women on here.

I asked him. As an eligible batchelor he believes they offer sex freely to encourage a relationship to develop; but it does not help. He does do chatting up and tends to be successful more times than not; he has a far higher score rate than men on Fab. It seems to be more acceptable for a girl to be on POF than Fab.

He has not tried Fab but from what I know ladies after NSA sex are more discerning than relationship seekers. So POF for sex and Fab to hone your chat up techniques. Weird world.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Morning OP.

words fail me.

Just wanted to say, I have experienced this in the vanilla world. A lot by women, but also guys. But I've been lucky that they have never been that explicit in their comments.

The double standards for men and women makes me absolutely sick! I guess it's one of the last taboos that remains since the sexual revolution.

My heart breaks for u having to deal with that shit.

Bless all those fantastic genuinely lovely liberal broad minded guys on here, who see us girls as the fun loving people we are.

Makes me appreciate them all the more now!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Laugh it off. Sounds like a guy who's insecure with a woman having experience.

He'd probably be shit in bed anyway.

So fucking true!!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, if you want to out the men who cannot, or will not, accept a woman's absolute right to have sex with whom she wants, when she wants, then invite them to a mmfm meet.

We have been surprised how insulting some men get when they realise they will not be having sex with the lady 1 on 1. For us they are the non swingers after the benefits of a relationship or seeking an ego boost from "fucking another man's woman".

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Was totally impressed bu an actual serious response from paddy ... Then normal business resumed with the rose through the flaps chat

I thought it was a new poster as he's changed his username. The rose through the flaps reminded me of Paddy, and lo and behold...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He just wanted to desperately fuck you...ignore the dickwipe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was totally impressed bu an actual serious response from paddy ... Then normal business resumed with the rose through the flaps chat

I thought it was a new poster as he's changed his username. The rose through the flaps reminded me of Paddy, and lo and behold...

I recognised his arse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was totally impressed bu an actual serious response from paddy ... Then normal business resumed with the rose through the flaps chat

I thought it was a new poster as he's changed his username. The rose through the flaps reminded me of Paddy, and lo and behold...

I recognised his arse.

lolol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I so hate the self righteous moralistic type. Just ignore the idiots and good luck in finding someone

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By *untimes6969Man
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"Laugh it off. Sounds like a guy who's insecure with a woman having experience.

He'd probably be shit in bed anyway.

So fucking true!!!!!!!!

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