FabSwingers.com forum: Time wasters and Wankers

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why do Single guys continue to be such total timewasters, we understand its not all of them, but it is a very large percentage.

In the past we have arranged and organised many group meets, when doing so we dont just put the add in the meets wanted colum but we speak with most of the guys in the chat rooms explaining our needs and answering any questions they have, so that they have as much information as possible before hand.

In nov we organised a meet and wanted around 6 guys to join us, so I invited 20.... yes 20... how many did we get? 4

The thing is everyone of those guys had my mobile number so could have phoned/txted to say sorry changed my mind or even just said I,m not coming now.

Last night we had another meet and wanted 6 to 8 guys....I invited 25 -30 guys.....how many turned up..? 4 and one of those bottled it and left.

Its not as if we are ugly.... well maybe I am a bit...lol and we are also very easy going, very clean and always respect everyone elses boundries.

Out of all the guys who said they were definatly coming they all had my number, only 2 of the ones that did not come got in touch.(thanks guys)

And the 3 that did stay definatly got a real treat and we enjoyed the sexy company very much....so thanks to those 3 for being the only genuine guys here.

I was a single guy on here at one stage, but if invited always turned up to meets.......why can't you lot?

Sorry for the RANT but its so frustrating.... for future meets maybe we will be using genuine guys at the clubs who really want to play and not just wank, fantasize.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we tried to organise a gbang and found it so hard we gave up, you would think that the guys would love it

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

were they all verified?

did they all give you their mobile number? or just take yours?

did any of your regulars know any of them?

you will always get timewasters but you can minimise it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think the honest answer is not all men want gangbangs or group fun, and while at the time it might sound great when you’re in a majority group with lots of competition and the offer comes along, the reality always sinks in after they’ve actually thought about it more and by then probably become to embarrassed to admit it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/11/10 15:29:01]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

not all of us are timewasters.

ive had so many women and couples mess me about its been a nightmare.

sadly those who do want to meet a always so far away.

please dont tar us all with the same brush because some of us do love to meet and if ive book a hotel i send the confirmation number or turn up at their place when arranged.

but there are dreamers and timewasters on all sites.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"not all of us are timewasters.

ive had so many women and couples mess me about its been a nightmare.

sadly those who do want to meet a always so far away.

please dont tar us all with the same brush because some of us do love to meet and if ive book a hotel i send the confirmation number or turn up at their place when arranged.

but there are dreamers and timewasters on all sites."

total agree.couples and single females are a nightmare at times and yet we get the flak.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

agree couples can be timewasters too as can anyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"not all of us are timewasters.

ive had so many women and couples mess me about its been a nightmare.

sadly those who do want to meet a always so far away.

please dont tar us all with the same brust because some of us do love to meet and if ive book a hotel i send the confirmation number or turn up at their place when arranged.

but there are dreamers and timewasters on all sites."

I agree..

When we have had gangbangs we always invite at least double the amount of guys we wanted to turn up.

Why dont you see if there are any gangbang groups near you?

There are quite a few in the NW that we have met and we just have to turn up,all we have had to do is let the person running the group how many guys we wanted there and our limits x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there are plenty of people on here (not just guys) who like the idea of one thing or another, but when it comes down to it dont have the bottle.

On the plus side, you've had two nights now... one with 4 guys, and another with 3. Have you thought of re-using (bad way of putting it!) the ones that did turn up, so eventually you know a group of guys that do actually turn up, then you'll be more likely to be certain of 6-8 turning up when you want that many? Just a thought...

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Would you really have wanted 25-30 guys turn up

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Maybe try making the first meet with these guys a social meet....maybe a drink in the pub?

That way you get a feeling who may be just a talker, but more importantly (for me anyway) you get to out the unsavoury characters.

I can't think of anything worse than just having a bunch of guys turn up at a gangbang only to find that some of them lacked personal hygeine, were rough as feck, or not what they claimed to be.

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

"I think there are plenty of people on here (not just guys) who like the idea of one thing or another, but when it comes down to it don't have the bottle"

Following the usual checks, we arranged to meet a cpl, en-route "She" called us stating they didn't have the confidence to go through with the meet, we left them with the option to contact us once they felt confident.

Because it wasn't an issue to us at the time, we were contacted several weeks later, and a fabulous meet was had bi all

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

we dounderstand that there are genuine single guys out there and that sometimes its couples as well who waste your time. But generally it odes tend to be single guys that are the problem.

We really would not have wanted 20 odd guys turning up....but because our experiance of how many guys turned up in the past meets we decided to go the whole hog and invite loads so that we got the actual numbers we wanted.

Most of the guys were verified and all of them had our contact number....all it takes is one call to say sorry I cant make it.

We do meet some guys who we have met previously on other occassions, but it is nice to meet new guys as well.

anyway...I've clamed down now...lol Rant over ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we dounderstand that there are genuine single guys out there and that sometimes its couples as well who waste your time. But generally it odes tend to be single guys that are the problem.

Most of the guys were verified and all of them had our contact number....all it takes is one call to say sorry I cant make it.

We do meet some guys who we have met previously on other occassions, but it is nice to meet new guys as well.

anyway...I've clamed down now...lol Rant over .... "

it only appears single guys are the problem as there are so many of them.

if the same amount of couples and single females then they would also be the same problems with them.

look how many couples seek a bi female and struggle to find one? plenty of them i bet timewaste also but you never get to hear about it.

always the single guy who take a kicking yet some of us do meet, are genuine and polite.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

As we said before we know there are nice genuine guys out there, so I suppose it is about numbers really but it does guys no favours at all when you have to Invite 20+ guys to try and get between 6-8 guys and then only 3 or 4 turn up.

Every one of those guys I spoke to confirmed that they would be attending, they all had my mobile number..... Ive heard only from 2 guys.....thats what gives single guys a bad time.....and yes I suppose it means Genuine guys get tarred with the same brush.

Its so frustrating, its Genuine guys we feel sorry for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there are a couple guys on here who specifically arrange successful gangbangs, maybe you should contact them , unfortunately I cannot remember their ID now...... hmm guess I'm not much use really am I now lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi Flip,

I think we have seen them, but usually we prefer to meet play locally and not travel all across the country.

Thanks for the Info tho x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/11/10 17:10:55]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i guess guys who havnt attended a gangbang before may get nervous and let you down.

but they shouldnt make contact if they have any doubts.

but i have had women let me down often after they have contacted me. they send dirty pics,text,take on the phone and then go silent once the meet is arranged.

i just block anyone who wastes my time now.

i dont care anymore. same with people who just deleted mail without a reply.

shows they are plane rude. i dont care what anyone thinks anymore.

im polite and genuine. if they are not.

blocked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gangbangs are a nightmare to organise.. I think most men love the idea but when it comes down to it some do bottle it..... (talking from experience) you could always try a club, I tried it that way too but once again it wasn't ideal .......

Careful planning and social meets seems to be the way the forward to make these things a success....

Good Luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...how many turned up..? 4 and one of those bottled it and left.

On the point above: nobody has to have sex with you even if they said that they would.

Anyone has the right to say 'no' at any time and for any reason.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...how many turned up..? 4 and one of those bottled it and left.

On the point above: nobody has to have sex with you even if they said that they would.

Anyone has the right to say 'no' at any time and for any reason."

That is a good point x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yes we agree, would have been nice if the guy who left had said...sorry this is not for me instead of saying just gonna get my phone from the car...then disappearing.

Its easy to change your mind we all do it. But its also easy to say i've changed my mind not coming now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes we agree, would have been nice if the guy who left had said...sorry this is not for me instead of saying just gonna get my phone from the car...then disappearing.

Its easy to change your mind we all do it. But its also easy to say i've changed my mind not coming now.

Yeah it would have been nice, but, on the assumption that everyone you've invited is only human, it doesn't always happen that way.

A gangbang can be a pretty high pressure and competitive situation - especially if its with a group of strangers. I can sympathise with the OP's irritation but can also sympathise if the guy had a moment of weakness.

I don't believe there's anyone here who has never tried to avoid having to say something difficult to someone's face.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im surprised that single guys dont turn up for meets when they've been invited. You'd think they'd jump at the chance. I personally think a lot of is is bravado at the time, accepting an invitation but knowing deep down that they probably wouldnt rise to the challenge

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By *ibrosMan
over a year ago

harrow

This comes up time and again, 1 in 4 turning up. Looking back, I would try to get an invitation to an event and only later worry about how I was going to fulfil the commitment. So, I can see how many guys,particularly inexperienced ones, are going to end up no shows.

That said, a phone call is the least you can do. I have never let anyone down on a meet, but that my be as much good fortune as planning.

One lady friend asked me to organise a group of guys for a party. I could only find 2 or 3 that I would trust and have confidence to be there. It isn't easy to arrange a gangbang, although you would think otherwise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we got let down last weekend ,was the last weekend before xmas we could meet, I, Luisa ,was al lsexed up and excited, spent hours cleaning sorting the house, got kids sorted ,and then dressed up ready for a good hot MMF and got a phone call 30 mins before the time arranged to cancel. not impressed at all, makes me wonder what the single blokes are on here for if they dont go through with it finally !..its just sex for goodness sake ,why so scared? Im a naughty sexual horny latina who jsut wants to be given a good time and giving it on a plate.. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we got let down last weekend ,was the last weekend before xmas we could meet, I, Luisa ,was al lsexed up and excited, spent hours cleaning sorting the house, got kids sorted ,and then dressed up ready for a good hot MMF and got a phone call 30 mins before the time arranged to cancel. not impressed at all, makes me wonder what the single blokes are on here for if they dont go through with it finally !..its just sex for goodness sake ,why so scared? Im a naughty sexual horny latina who jsut wants to be given a good time and giving it on a plate.. x "

its there loss.

block the assholes.

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By *arambarMan
over a year ago

swindon

Agreed - definitely their loss.

Although at least he did contact you rather than just not bother to turn up. That's not much consolation, but I think there's a difference between a timewaster who doesn't even contact you beforehand and someone who cancels - even if the end result is, sadly for you, the same.

Hope you don't lump all us single males in the same category as that person. If only Folkestone was closer to Swindon!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whats with this “it’s their loss” you read it all the time on these forums, how can you lose something you’ve never had?

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By *emjoCouple
over a year ago

Reading

Main issue here is rudeness. We always turn up as promised but if there was ever a situation when we couldn't we would never ever dream of not letting the other party know.

When we first started organizing parties we had a 50% fallout. Everone that didn't turn up we predicted in advance so you can spot with experience the ones that will let you down.

Trick is not to take it personally and don't get hung up over it. Easier said than done however.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Timewasters are a way of life on these sites i'm sorry to say.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"Timewasters are a way of life on these sites i'm sorry to say."

I don't agree with that at all

Been here over 2 years and never come across one yet

Chatted to a fair few people that ive decided not to meet though......maybe im the timewaster

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would you really have wanted 25-30 guys turn up

oh yes oh yes oh yes oh yes oh yes oh yes

i wwe would be up 4 that

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"Would you really have wanted 25-30 guys turn up

oh yes oh yes oh yes oh yes oh yes oh yes

i wwe would be up 4 that

go for it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ditto

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've carefully met couples and singles for discreet meets over the years, i've tried the swinging club scene and its not been my cup of tea, somaybe as someone stated earliar, these people might think they're up fo it but the reality tends to scare them away.

Me, I'm a great believer in try anything once, yet strangely enough not done doggings or gangbangs yet lol

I think as others have said, perhaps meet these people socially, you then get a better idea of whose up for it and whose not.

I think in that situation, its not so much on how hot the woman or couple are, its the situation.

Me going to a club that had a woman been gangbanged by 13 Turkish men whilst her husband wanked off.

Didn't really float my boat even though i love watching gangbangs on dvd's for instance.

just careful selection, and really getting to the core of what the guys really want before you arrange to meet them.

and I'm available for weddings kids parties and bar mitzvah's.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Another single guy post when will they ever get a break

single fems and couples are the same some worse i say come on guys stand up for yourselves i luv ya

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think my point I was making was the same, I think with these types of meets, you have to find out what people are expecting.

And yes, I have had my fair share of couples who have wasted my time too, and ladies as well.

Just us single guys who get the grief.

Maybe we oughta dress up and chain ourselves to Sex shops etc and protest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Whats with this “it’s their loss” you read it all the time on these forums, how can you lose something you’ve never had? "

I don't get that either - and keep saying it!

If someone doesn't want you, it's hardly their loss or they'd turn up!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Timewasters are a way of life on these sites i'm sorry to say.

I don't agree with that at all

Been here over 2 years and never come across one yet

Chatted to a fair few people that ive decided not to meet though......maybe im the timewaster

Neither do I. I've been in this lifestyle for three years, I'm on various sites and yet to encounter a time waster!!

There have been many I've met socially and decided not to play with, but they've all turned up!

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

"Timewasters are a way of life on these sites i'm sorry to say."

I guess labelling people as “time-wasters” helps with the rejection process

Because it's a swingers site doesn't mean were all compatible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Timewasters are a way of life on these sites i'm sorry to say.

I guess labelling people as “time-wasters” helps with the rejection process

Because it's a swingers site doesn't mean were all compatible

Indeed, as you put on my recent topic, everyone has their preference.

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By *ngieandMrManCouple
over a year ago

hereford

There is a simple reason why it seems the single guys are notoriously unreliable and that is because they are NOT single guys, neither are they real swingers. It’s just a hubby sat at home messing about on the Internet when the wife is out or in bed. They pose as ‘singles’ they pose as ‘couples’ or anything else they might dream up.

So you can chase around the idea that 99% of single males are time-wasters, you can say the same about couples and single females BUT in point of fact you’re all wrong, because they are not REAL SWINGERS.

REAL SWINGING single guys, REAL SWINGING single fems, and REAL SWINGING couples do tend to be 100% reliable.

As for gang-bangs, personally I can’t see why any bloke would be in the queue when essentially all that is required is that he provides himself as a human dildo. Unless a guy has a bit of a fetish for being part of a gang-bang I can’t see much point to it from a guys prospective.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If its any consolation, some years ago in business we held golf days, we invited 60+ people to get 20 or so to show; so no matter what sort of swing you're practicing, some people won't show up for a good time, even when you feed them and give them trophies

On another note, I met a fab couple last week as the guy they'd been chatting to for ages made excuses at the 11th hour, I'd given them my mobile number and got a short notice call to action. Luckily I was in the right place at the right time. Had an amazing time, the loser who cried off really missed out.

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By *UNCHBOXMan
over a year ago

folkestone

I agree there are some single males who are complete dickheads who get off on the fantasy of a meet but when it comes to it cant go through with it.

Ive had couples who have told me some arrange a meet and then text on the night of the meet that their coming, then dont turn up, leaving the couple wondering what has happened to them. These sort of twats give all the genuine ones who turn up a bad name, and put off a lot of couples from meeting single guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I agree there are some single males who are complete dickheads who get off on the fantasy of a meet but when it comes to it cant go through with it.

Sorry, I disagree with you there.

Every...fricking...day there are negative posts about single men. I only meet single men and not once has a post made me think "oh I'm not meeting single men because they're time wasters."

In three years I've never encountered a time waster: not once. I meet for a no pressure social meet. I'm the one who puts them at ease, we talk, laugh, rarely talk about sex but end up arranging a meet.

I don't know how people select their playmates so that they keep being let down, but my way works for me!

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By *UNCHBOXMan
over a year ago

folkestone

"I agree there are some single males who are complete dickheads who get off on the fantasy of a meet but when it comes to it cant go through with it.

Sorry, I disagree with you there.

Every...fricking...day there are negative posts about single men. I only meet single men and not once has a post made me think "oh I'm not meeting single men because they're time wasters."

I don't know how people select their playmates so that they keep being let down, but my way works for me!"

I think you have misunderstood what i meant - i meant that once a couple has a single guy who doesnt turn up or cancels, then it may well put them off. Ive had several couples tell me this is the case, and although they would like like my profile, because of bad experiences with single guys they wont now meet with them.

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"I agree there are some single males who are complete dickheads who get off on the fantasy of a meet but when it comes to it cant go through with it.

Sorry, I disagree with you there.

Every...fricking...day there are negative posts about single men. I only meet single men and not once has a post made me think "oh I'm not meeting single men because they're time wasters."

I don't know how people select their playmates so that they keep being let down, but my way works for me!

Maybe that is just an excuse they use because they don't fancy the idea of meeting you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

".............

Maybe that is just an excuse they use because they don't fancy the idea of meeting you?"

In my experience guys who get invited to gangbangs don't usually have any problem with the IDEA, it's the REALITY they can't cope with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Im surprised that single guys dont turn up for meets when they've been invited. You'd think they'd jump at the chance. I personally think a lot of is is bravado at the time, accepting an invitation but knowing deep down that they probably wouldnt rise to the challenge

That's a good point, I also think many have a conquest mentality-once you've agreed to meet them they've scored the victory (they know they could have sex with you), the thrill was in the chase and once they've cornered the hapless female their interest wanes!

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By *UNCHBOXMan
over a year ago

folkestone

"I agree there are some single males who are complete dickheads who get off on the fantasy of a meet but when it comes to it cant go through with it.

Sorry, I disagree with you there.

Every...fricking...day there are negative posts about single men. I only meet single men and not once has a post made me think "oh I'm not meeting single men because they're time wasters."

I don't know how people select their playmates so that they keep being let down, but my way works for me!

Maybe that is just an excuse they use because they don't fancy the idea of meeting you?"

That maybe the case if i was the one contacting the couples asking to meet, but this comes from couples who have contacted me first or who have messaged me in swingers chatrooms, telling me that if they changed their minds about meeting single guys, they would like to meet me.

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