FabSwingers.com forum: Do you ladies read all your mail?

By *pen_minded_gent OP Man
over a year ago

london

One for the ladies-

As guys, we are constantly being told to send an original message, no one liners etc which I compleatly agree with, however, it is frustrating when we type out a well worded unique email for it to simply be deleted with no reply as opposed to a simple reply such as "no thank you"

Whilst I appreciate you ladies can't reply to all mail you recieve but would be nice to get a simple response for a well written 1st mail!

Do you always read the mail or just go on the guys pic?

Not having a moan here, I'm just genuinely curious.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Right now I have 499 unread messages in my mail box

Who's got time to read all that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes, and if its a long well written message then I do reply, the one liner garbage gets deleted immediately, but the answer is 100% yes I do x

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By *pen_minded_gent OP Man
over a year ago

london

[Removed by poster at 25/07/15 14:56:44]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope I dont. I like to think I have a life away from fab. Inbox is currently on 150 unread I have got rid of a few messages as it was more. I posted a meet once never again 1300 messages in my inbox lol. Mass delete required

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont waste much time on initial mails..and they can be pretty generic, if they decide to get into conversation thats where the work really lies.

I never discuss sex(or the potential sex)in any great detail ever...I dont mail everyday..

its always worked for me..

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By *pen_minded_gent OP Man
over a year ago

london

Maybe you ladies need a PA?!

So how do you determine who you reply to, luck of the draw?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not able to read all unfortunately so I go on the pic and the first few words you can preview on phone. The good pics generally involve clothes FYI!!

Also I'm not a fan of long messages!

It's difficult but I message guys and get no reply so it's not just one way round!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read all mine but I probably wouldn't bother replying to a lot as its obvious they haven't read my profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I don't read all my mail, when there's too much of it, it becomes a bit of a chore tbh.

For me it's a combination of:

User name

Avatar

Shadow man

Opening 1st line....

Determines if it's read it not.

Hope that helps!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yes, and if its a long well written message then I do reply, the one liner garbage gets deleted immediately, but the answer is 100% yes I do x"

bins my 1000page essay on why I want to shag you...I even changed the username throughout grrrrr

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By *pen_minded_gent OP Man
over a year ago

london

Shadow man?

What is this?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/07/15 15:00:40]

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

I'm sorry but I don't. I skim the message in my inbox but rarely open it to read it. I currently have 374 unread messages (I know I can turn my 'looking for' off and reduce this but occasionally there is a gem that is worth pursuing). I used to go through all my messages once a week when I had time on my own with my laptop (easier than using the mobile site for that purpose anyway) but it started to feel like an admin chore rather than fun. Now I save ones that may interest me when I am actively meeting unread and have been known to contact someone after months as a result.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I don't read all mail

I've given up on sending no thanks lately after quite a few abusive messages back.

Also if you reply it means they can break through any filters you may later apply on the account.

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Nope, I look at the profile first, and if it is just 2 lines of drivel saying here for fun and a cock pic? I don't even bother......as I can see it's just usual 'how are you'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read it all. I reply to all initial mails. Why wouldn't I?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe you ladies need a PA?!

So how do you determine who you reply to, luck of the draw?"

Profile pics

If I like them I'll open their message and reply

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By *pen_minded_gent OP Man
over a year ago

london

Looks like the forum is the place to be!

Thanks for the responses, I am now no closer to understanding the fairer sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look at the profile first, then the mail. If the profile is no good I delete the message unread.

If the profile is good then the message could say pretty much anything and I'll reply to it.

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By *ack LondonMan
over a year ago

London

"No

Right now I have 499 unread messages in my mail box

Who's got time to read all that

Good lord! You have my sincere sympathies, it would take until tomorrow afternoon to get through that lot!

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By *pen_minded_gent OP Man
over a year ago

london

[Removed by poster at 25/07/15 15:07:44]

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By *pen_minded_gent OP Man
over a year ago

london

"I look at the profile first, then the mail. If the profile is no good I delete the message unread.

If the profile is good then the message could say pretty much anything and I'll reply to it."

What do you class as a "good profile"?

I would be grateful for any pointers with mine?

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By *aeriequeenWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

If they have a nice avatar, i'll check out profile. If its sparse or no pics/private pics/veris I'll not bother. If pics are attached my curiosity is often piqued.

It seems unfair but ill take someone more seriously if theyve taken time with their profile

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By *aeriequeenWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

"I look at the profile first, then the mail. If the profile is no good I delete the message unread.

If the profile is good then the message could say pretty much anything and I'll reply to it.

What do you class as a "good profile"?

I would be grateful for any pointers with mine?"

You have a very good profile and a few sexy pics maybe add one or two more. Possibly a bit more about preferences and what youd like from fab but not essential.

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By *pen_minded_gent OP Man
over a year ago

london

"I look at the profile first, then the mail. If the profile is no good I delete the message unread.

If the profile is good then the message could say pretty much anything and I'll reply to it.

What do you class as a "good profile"?

I would be grateful for any pointers with mine?

You have a very good profile and a few sexy pics maybe add one or two more. Possibly a bit more about preferences and what youd like from fab but not essential."

Thank you for the pointers, very much appreciated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look at the picture they send with the message first.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

"If they have a nice avatar, i'll check out profile. If its sparse or no pics/private pics/veris I'll not bother. If pics are attached my curiosity is often piqued.

It seems unfair but ill take someone more seriously if theyve taken time with their profile"

Doh! Now I know why you never reply!

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By *aeriequeenWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

"If they have a nice avatar, i'll check out profile. If its sparse or no pics/private pics/veris I'll not bother. If pics are attached my curiosity is often piqued.

It seems unfair but ill take someone more seriously if theyve taken time with their profile

Doh! Now I know why you never reply!"

I knew this would bite me on the ass lol sorry

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By *aeriequeenWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

"I look at the profile first, then the mail. If the profile is no good I delete the message unread.

If the profile is good then the message could say pretty much anything and I'll reply to it.

What do you class as a "good profile"?

I would be grateful for any pointers with mine?

You have a very good profile and a few sexy pics maybe add one or two more. Possibly a bit more about preferences and what youd like from fab but not essential.

Thank you for the pointers, very much appreciated "

No worries

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

"If they have a nice avatar, i'll check out profile. If its sparse or no pics/private pics/veris I'll not bother. If pics are attached my curiosity is often piqued.

It seems unfair but ill take someone more seriously if theyve taken time with their profile

Doh! Now I know why you never reply!

I knew this would bite me on the ass lol sorry

That's all I ever wanted to do!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Click on the profile first to see if we've exchanged messages before or met (as that's been known

), then read message, no face picture gets no response, miles away gets told and the follow up message of 'I can travel' gets read and not replied to as in both cases it's obvious they haven't read my profile. Those messages of 'what u up to tonight/are u free tonight' get told to read status

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On my profile it says I'm not interested in anyone who doesn't accommodate, is attached or is miles away. Plus I don't meet smokers. I click on the profile before opening mail and if they are any of the above I delete without reading.

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By *aeriequeenWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

"If they have a nice avatar, i'll check out profile. If its sparse or no pics/private pics/veris I'll not bother. If pics are attached my curiosity is often piqued.

It seems unfair but ill take someone more seriously if theyve taken time with their profile

Doh! Now I know why you never reply!

I knew this would bite me on the ass lol sorry

That's all I ever wanted to do!

Now why didnt you say so?

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By *apillonNoirWoman
over a year ago

There...

"I look at the profile first, then the mail. If the profile is no good I delete the message unread.

If the profile is good then the message could say pretty much anything and I'll reply to it."

^ This. I'm not inundated with mail (fortunately) as my filters are set very tight and it's very easy to see very fast if someone has read my profile or not!

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

"If they have a nice avatar, i'll check out profile. If its sparse or no pics/private pics/veris I'll not bother. If pics are attached my curiosity is often piqued.

It seems unfair but ill take someone more seriously if theyve taken time with their profile

Doh! Now I know why you never reply!

I knew this would bite me on the ass lol sorry

That's all I ever wanted to do!

Now why didnt you say so?

I never had the chance! I'd jump at it. Just wink.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't read all mine no. I do look at pics, or if they've sent pics, coz it is looks i go for and then i'd read the message for some sign of intelligence.

Tbf to guys they do send me pretty much non-offensive messages, mainly ones i can't reply to like compliments or hi how are u. One day i shall tell them how i really am and see if they can handle the reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No

Right now I have 499 unread messages in my mail box

Who's got time to read all that

Another reason for me not sending any messages to Women/couples I haven't already messaged before, I haven't updated my profile text yet but hopefully being a regular on the forms wouldn't stop people who use the forums from at least reading a pm if I sent them one

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots

I always read and respond to all messages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to always reply to everything then I found if you say no thanks or your not what I'm looking for I then get asked why? Why not? What am I looking for? It becomes a tad tedious so no I no longer read it, I scan down and if the first line looks interesting or the avatar catches my eye I look at the profile if I like the profile I'll read the message and respond, not always the politest thing but when you have 300-400 messages sat there it's just the way it is

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

"If they have a nice avatar, i'll check out profile. If its sparse or no pics/private pics/veris I'll not bother. If pics are attached my curiosity is often piqued.

It seems unfair but ill take someone more seriously if theyve taken time with their profile

Doh! Now I know why you never reply!

I knew this would bite me on the ass lol sorry

That's all I ever wanted to do!

Now why didnt you say so?

I never had the chance! I'd jump at it. Just wink.

And now I can't message you. I'm a year outside your age filter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read them all but reply to very few. Those who have obviously not read my profile get deleted straight away. Those just saying "suck my cock" etc also get deleted, so do guys who are way out of my age preferences. Doesn't leave many but quality always comes first with me.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I try to but get distracted and then the disappear off the page and then I think oh well they've probably forgotten they even mailed me so I don't bother

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read them all, but as before, if they've not bothered to read my profile they get deleted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read all my mail as I feel guys have taken the time if they are not what I'm looking for it a polite no thank you x

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

My wife recently sent up a single profile, one line of text, no pictures, she had 30 messages in the first HOUR!

they were coming in quicker than she could read them, let alone respond. With the ones she did respond to with a No of various lengths, this just generated even more messages to deal with!

A very large number came from men well over 100 miles away. We live in Cambridge but were getting messages from people in Scotland, Wales, Manchester, Liverpool etc.

From a single guy she got 3 identical copy and paste messages in the space of 2 hours.

Some of the messages just lookes like a cat had walked across the keyboard. They literally weren't even words, but a random mixture of letters and numbers.

She only had the profile for a day and had to abandon it, it was too much work. Can you imagine what it would have been like if she had actually attached pics?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My wife recently sent up a single profile, one line of text, no pictures, she had 30 messages in the first HOUR!

they were coming in quicker than she could read them, let alone respond. With the ones she did respond to with a No of various lengths, this just generated even more messages to deal with!

A very large number came from men well over 100 miles away. We live in Cambridge but were getting messages from people in Scotland, Wales, Manchester, Liverpool etc.

From a single guy she got 3 identical copy and paste messages in the space of 2 hours.

Some of the messages just lookes like a cat had walked across the keyboard. They literally weren't even words, but a random mixture of letters and numbers.

She only had the profile for a day and had to abandon it, it was too much work. Can you imagine what it would have been like if she had actually attached pics?"

I plan to visit all those places...she up fir it?

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By *reedy_for_funCouple
over a year ago

My House

I don't read all of them. Of those I can tell are just a one liner I usually just delete without reading. Those that are obviously copy and paste jobs I delete. If the same person sends the message again I usually end up blocking them.

Those they write nice messages (even if they are crude or explicit

) I do reply even if it takes some time. I try to make my rejection letters polite and those that interest me I send a flirty reply.

If it looks like we'll definitely be meeting I pass it off to my OH to make the arrangements. He has final say on who we meet even if I'm extremely horny for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always read all messages x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read all of mine ,I used to answer them all too.....but have given up doing that as it either turns to ping pong messages asking why etc or turns nasty or they beg I prefer to answer people I might want to meet ,people I have.met that sort of thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just being online on the forum now will generate messages. I read the majority of them but if I can see the opening sentence plainly shows they haven't read my profile they get deleted. If I like the profile and the person seems interesting I'll have a chat. But then being online means more messages coming in AND answering the few messages I want to respond to. I do a regular block deletes. I often have the thought I'm glad I'm not a fella on here. I'd give up!

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By *ajandroseMan
over a year ago

tamworth

Hi , just our tuppence worth , but a thank you not interested AND Block in one would be a good idea we think lol ,no doubt we'll be shot down by the why should be have to brigade lol - this is said in jest , no need for any one to sharpen cudgels ,can't see any real downside , other than you will not see as many profiles as you search , on the other hand you also know where you stand , just our humble opinion x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't see the issue. I don't ignore people in real life so I don't on here either. It's not difficult to be polite.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"I don't see the issue. I don't ignore people in real life so I don't on here either. It's not difficult to be polite. "

I do...I ignore and avoid anyone in the street that I don't know but who is trying to get something from me,it's like playing run the gauntlet down our high street because you get pounced on every few metres so yes I ignore those people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't see the issue. I don't ignore people in real life so I don't on here either. It's not difficult to be polite.

Little smile "no thanks" while walking quickly.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"I don't see the issue. I don't ignore people in real life so I don't on here either. It's not difficult to be polite.

Little smile "no thanks" while walking quickly.

You engage or make eye contact that's it! You're a goner

I just ignore and carry on with what I'm doing

As for messages,I replied to one yesterday,a few hours after it was sent,the sender didn't have a clue what I was replying to as he'd forgotten he'd even messaged me,so I don't feel rude or impolite for walking by or or ignoring messages while I'm busy doing other things

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By *entaur_UKMan
over a year ago

Cannock

"One for the ladies-

Whilst I appreciate you ladies can't reply to all mail you recieve but would be nice to get a simple response for a well written 1st mail!

Do you always read the mail or just go on the guys pic?

Not having a moan here, I'm just genuinely curious.

I agree it's very frustrating, some messages I spend a good 5 or 10 minutes on then they just sit unread for weeks in the sent folder.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ture sexy swingers like u should be messaged loads, as there are a lot more single fella on here looking for meets,ive bin going to a spa for sum time an there are a lot of time wasters.but u gotta try,happy swingers dont allways get laid or meet that the fun it,i never get messages haha.

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By *uby_xWoman
over a year ago

funky town

I did try to reply to messages even if it was just a no thank you. But for every one I send I get three back. I've given up trying with 2014 messages it's getting crazy, I tend to scan down and pick local ones now to read.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Looks like the forum is the place to be!

Thanks for the responses, I am now no closer to understanding the fairer sex

Set you're account to bisexual and looking for men.

Stick meet today on as well.

See if you can be arsed to read them all lol

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By *o30Woman
over a year ago

Lincoln

"No

Right now I have 499 unread messages in my mail box

Who's got time to read all that

"
wow. I'm lucky if I get one new message. I don't understand why men on here think all women get loads, from personal experience I don't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/07/15 20:21:51]

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By *iss-PinkWoman
over a year ago

Gloucester

Yes. I don't, however, reply to all of my mail

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The more men joins the fussier and more rules womem will get. Thats why I hardly email them on the searches LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

people should take the time read profiles,chemistry an banter is a turn on,but sum just wont nsa sex,not get to deep,its a fine line havin sex with stangers dont ask dont play,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me, when I was meeting, 1st check was age, IV never fancied a guy younger than me, this was stated on my profile, so any mail from younger guys, deleted.

Hi. How's you? Nice boobs. If I can see that's the whole message, without opening, Deleted.

Then I click on profile, anything drastically puts me off in the text, deleted. Then pics, if all dark grainy cock pics, or of that ilk, deleted. Any that are still good at that point, I read the message. If it's decent, I'll reply, if it's a detailed description of what they're going to do to me/asking for bareback, from a couples profile but just the man meeting, deleted.

I don't have time to reply to all. Nor can I be bothered, fab is for fun. Not for hours of admin to sooth egos, and to get whiney/beggy or abusive mail back from those who can't take rejection.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Simply cannot...1236 unread messages. .. I'd it doesn't have a catchy subtitle and banging pic...it doesn't get read I'm afraid x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't see the issue. I don't ignore people in real life so I don't on here either. It's not difficult to be polite. "

That because your nice lol.

Disclaimer. Not saying those who dont reply are not nice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a message once. I read it.

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By *iss-PinkWoman
over a year ago

Gloucester

I don't understand why those who have hundreds and hundreds of unread messages just don't delete them???

or am I missing something?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand why those who have hundreds and hundreds of unread messages just don't delete them???

or am I missing something?!

I used to try and keep on top of my inbox, was easy when i was on here a lot and deleting as i chatted. Got lazy, i suppose.

Deleted most of mine and then put in my profile idk when i'm meeting, got school holidays in my profile header, so not getting many messages now.

Despite having filters on sometimes you have to add extra to your profile (and status sometimes) to get messages down. It does work though, and i do feel that most guys read your profile because of this.

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By *aughtywifeyWoman
over a year ago

I always ask for a pic to be attached then I can assume they at least read my profile.

Can't stand the long winded copy and paste just like a nice short message about yourself and if you fit what I've asked for.

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By *huramMan
over a year ago

London

With 25'682 messages currently unread in my inbox.

I just don't have the time.

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Yeah I generally reply to every mail I read even if it is with a very simple 'no thanks' however I don't read them all... the joy of the first line preview lets me see all the 'hi how r u sexy' messages and I delete them without reading. I know all I need to know from that.

Sometimes I click and look at their profile, if they're way too young/too old/not even close to my cuppa/using that bullshit Sydney crap/can't string a sentence then I don't bother to look at the mail then simply delete it.

I don't consider it rude. It's reality. My profile is pretty clear.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"With 25'682 messages currently unread in my inbox.

I just don't have the time. "

Those pesky women are a pain in the arse aren't they?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"With 25'682 messages currently unread in my inbox.

I just don't have the time. "

We sent 25'681 of those, and we'll keep sending until you RESPOND!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One for the ladies-

Whilst I appreciate you ladies can't reply to all mail you recieve but would be nice to get a simple response for a well written 1st mail!

Do you always read the mail or just go on the guys pic?

Not having a moan here, I'm just genuinely curious.

We do always read the mail but depending on the message and what's on his profile on what our reply is

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