FabSwingers.com forum: That polite "No thanks" you're looking for??

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok so after being on the forums for a while now i decided to take notice of the many posts from men complaining that a polite "no thanks" would be better than nothing at all! Armed with this knowledge and happy that i was being so lovely i proceeded to reply to the majority of my messages today with "no thanks. Dont think youre my type, happy fabbing" or something similar. So far ive had 9 abusive messages :/ wouldnt have recieved those if i'd just deleted! Thanks forums! Lmao xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hear ya! We can't win

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/07/15 17:37:35]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes you can always send it then block them op lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always block after a polite no thanks, stops unwanted abuse and lets face it, if you're not interested, why not filter them out? Chances are they'll probably forget they messaged you and try again in the future.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok so after being on the forums for a while now i decided to take notice of the many posts from men complaining that a polite "no thanks" would be better than nothing at all! Armed with this knowledge and happy that i was being so lovely i proceeded to reply to the majority of my messages today with "no thanks. Dont think youre my type, happy fabbing" or something similar. So far ive had 9 abusive messages :/ wouldnt have recieved those if i'd just deleted! Thanks forums! Lmao xx"

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

I have a standards copy and paste rejection message;

Hi thanks for showing an interest in my profile but I've got enough regular playmates at the moment as I can't meet as often as I'd like to anyway sorry

it's never got me abuse but I think it's too nice as they then seem to proceed to try and persuade me to change my mind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, I hope you've reported all abusive messages to admin.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh there is something in the air OP. I've had abuse for ignoring a message. How dare I cos he met my preferences so I must fuck him (apart from an unwritten one -don't be a prick)

So hun you just can't win I'm afraid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No accounting for idiots

For my part I do appreciate but don't expect a no thanks message I know ladies can be inundated and to expect them to reply to every message is a bit unrealistic

I would however reply to a no thanks message with a polite "thanks for taking the time to say so and have fun "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't reply anymore coz that's all you get! "What is your type then?" "Don't need to be your type it's just sex!" "Didn't want to fuck you anyway!"

Yeah guys, classy. I just block and delete now. Saves time.

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By *urreyloverMan
over a year ago

Guildford

Their abusive replies just confirm your original conclusion that they are not the type you are looking for. A gentleman would reply in a civil manner thanking you for your consideration and will also wish you all the best. As a previous poster has said, block the abusive ones.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must admit when I send a "No thanks" reply, I get a "Thanks for letting me know" reply.

Very rarely do I get any abuse back.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I too have a standard message:

"Thank you for your message. Unfortunately, it has not be deemed witty enough for a response. Happy swinging"

Works a treat with the men haha!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have a standards copy and paste rejection message;

Hi thanks for showing an interest in my profile but I've got enough regular playmates at the moment as I can't meet as often as I'd like to anyway sorry

it's never got me abuse but I think it's too nice as they then seem to proceed to try and persuade me to change my mind "

Maybe because you haven't been clear that you don't fancy them? It's hard isn't it as you don't want to offend anyone or make them feel bad. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/07/15 17:46:31]

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I did the same a few months ago

I had over 200 messages and replied to almost all of them with no thanks,took bloody ages and it's not something I'll do again,I just wanted to see what the reactions were

Not one abusive message back,everyone was very gracious

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By *ythenshawefredMan
over a year ago

stockport

"I always block after a polite no thanks, stops unwanted abuse and lets face it, if you're not interested, why not filter them out? Chances are they'll probably forget they messaged you and try again in the future."

No harm in blocking in this way I've blocked many people that have said I'm not their type simply so I don't message again in the future and waste both of our time

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"I have a standards copy and paste rejection message;

Hi thanks for showing an interest in my profile but I've got enough regular playmates at the moment as I can't meet as often as I'd like to anyway sorry

it's never got me abuse but I think it's too nice as they then seem to proceed to try and persuade me to change my mind

Maybe because you haven't been clear that you don't fancy them? It's hard isn't it as you don't want to offend anyone or make them feel bad. x"

Yea your caught between a rock and and hard place as I think saying your not my type is read to some as a polite way of you calling them a ugly sod so they take offence when they shouldn't. I message people and get told I'm not your type, it happens, we can't be for everyone, more people need to learn to take rejection gracefully and move on

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"I did the same a few months ago

I had over 200 messages and replied to almost all of them with no thanks,took bloody ages and it's not something I'll do again,I just wanted to see what the reactions were

Not one abusive message back,everyone was very gracious

Did I ask?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I must admit when I send a "No thanks" reply, I get a "Thanks for letting me know" reply.

Very rarely do I get any abuse back."

Same for us. We respond to everyone, and have only had abuse once. We usually get a "thanks, anyway." Shame for the OP, must have had some bad ones today.

-Courtney

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Should have added that if you abuse then report it

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

No thankyou

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never been abusive when I've been knocked back. What's the point it's not going ve get you what you want. Suck it up and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didn't get abuse when i did this but i did get chancers message me again days later wanting to 'continue our conversation'. Lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I send a polite no thanks to guys I will not block them and I normally either receive a nice reply or no reply at all.

Sometimes they will try their luck once again a few days or weeks later, I'll remind them we have already spoke and then I decide to block them, to help save my own and their own time.

The reason I don't block them from the original onset of contact is because if like myself if I am politely told no thanks I still like to appreciate the person(s) photo's and occasionally 'Fab' their pics, so they are given the same freedom, until they decide to push their luck that is.

It would be very odd to reciece a disrespectful message from a single female or couple and I don't think I have but only some couples have tried to persuade me that we have not spoke before hand, sonthey also get the famous block button smashed upon them

*typing from my touchscreen, so I do apologise for any typo's/spelling mistakes*

Happy Swinging Guys n Girls

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By *he horny kinkstersCouple
over a year ago

North West

How about...

"Thanks for your message. I have carefully considered the quality of your message, your profile and your pictures. After this assessment you have been allocated the following slot in my schedule;

Never.

You will be contacted by me 1 week before your slot with further details.

Thank you for your time"

....then block em.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How about...

"Thanks for your message. I have carefully considered the quality of your message, your profile and your pictures. After this assessment you have been allocated the following slot in my schedule;

Never.

You will be contacted by me 1 week before your slot with further details.

Thank you for your time"

....then block em."

This is fucking brilliant!

Going to message you right now see what response I get

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How about...

"Thanks for your message. I have carefully considered the quality of your message, your profile and your pictures. After this assessment you have been allocated the following slot in my schedule;

Never.

You will be contacted by me 1 week before your slot with further details.

Thank you for your time"

....then block em.

This is fucking brilliant!

Going to message you right now see what response I get

Inbox says no lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't get abuse when i did this but i did get chancers message me again days later wanting to 'continue our conversation'. Lol."

I get this or sometimes a random message set up to look like its a continuation from a previous conversation,we have had in the paat, obviously it's never happened, I do wonder if this tactic has ever worked on someone? Hmmmmm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just delete but if I do get pestered I then block bit cold and hard i know but tbh when I have replyed it seams to be a excuse to some to try n win me round

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Welcome to my world OP..i get abused mot matter what I say...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How about...

"Thanks for your message. I have carefully considered the quality of your message, your profile and your pictures. After this assessment you have been allocated the following slot in my schedule;

Never.

You will be contacted by me 1 week before your slot with further details.

Thank you for your time"

....then block em."

Haha! Seems a tad harsh :D x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Welcome to my world OP..i get abused mot matter what I say...

Do you mean abuse or abused? Some pay good money to be abused!!

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

I won't respond purely because it allows those you've sent a message to to bypass your filters when you choose to use them.

It's 3x the effort to reply and then block everyone we're not interested in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just when I was thinking there wasn't going to be the daily "let's all slag off the single men again" thread, up it pops. Thanks guys for restoring the natural balance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've commented a few times on this subject and given my opinion to which the majority of men take offence.....

My first point is simply this.. men dont rule the roost here and that bothers a lot of them. They think because they have a gym fit body and a 10 inch (internet inches) cock they can bed anything or anyone THEY choose

Men need to realise that we dont make the rules here. The female does and if you're rejected then dont start mouthing off like an aul doll on hormone replacement therapy..

My 2nd point is.. women dont have to reply to anyone at all. If they did they'd spend the majority of their time saying thanks, but no thanks to guys who havent even read their interests or profiles...

And finally.. if you cant handle rejection then dont message people in the first place!!!

Amen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've never been abusive when I've been knocked back. What's the point it's not going ve get you what you want. Suck it up and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"I won't respond purely because it allows those you've sent a message to to bypass your filters when you choose to use them.

It's 3x the effort to reply and then block everyone we're not interested in."

I did ask admin on a thread for a function to be able to reset filters when you need to so it prevents this from happening

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I say no thanks,mostly get thanks for letting me know etc.I make a profile note and if they message again thats when i block.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've commented a few times on this subject and given my opinion to which the majority of men take offence.....

Men need to realise that we dont make the rules here. The female does and if you're rejected then dont start mouthing off like an aul doll on hormone replacement therapy..

And finally.. if you cant handle rejection then dont message people in the first place!!!

Amen."

Amen to that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Welcome to my world OP..i get abused mot matter what I say...

Do you mean abuse or abused? Some pay good money to be abused!!"

Hehe, I meant abuse...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get that quite regularly recently from couples to when i politely tell them they will have received a notice that im not looking to meet couples & also states men only on profile (if i want to meet a couple i seek them out myself)

Best one was a guy asked me how he could date me instead of just hooking up.

I replied that i wouldnt date or sleep with him (just that no reason why etc just that i wouldnt)

He proceeded to reply saying I was rude and that it shows that I was uneducated!

The last I checked me saying i wont date someone doesnt make me rude or uneducated but guys are so bad at handling rejection on here.

I dont bother replying to messages now just block them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can't please all the people all the time.

What's reasonable for will be unreasonable for another.

I take a deleted as a polite no thanks. Nothing more to be said.

If receive a written no thanks I reply with a "thanks for taking the time to write back, much appreciated, have fun." And that's the end of it.

Although on one occasion I got a reply to my reply saying "Cunt. Blocked".

I'm assuming it was an insult and not a medical condition.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the repeat offenders.... You politely say no and they persist in messaging a few weeks later... I can only come up with so many polite excuses....so on replying ......you're damned if you do and damned if you don't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You can't please all the people all the time.

What's reasonable for will be unreasonable for another.

I take a deleted as a polite no thanks. Nothing more to be said.

If receive a written no thanks I reply with a "thanks for taking the time to write back, much appreciated, have fun." And that's the end of it.

Although on one occasion I got a reply to my reply saying "Cunt. Blocked".

I'm assuming it was an insult and not a medical condition.

It was a cry for help from me. Don't worry, I've managed to remove the cucumber from it now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get that quite regularly recently from couples to when i politely tell them they will have received a notice that im not looking to meet couples & also states men only on profile (if i want to meet a couple i seek them out myself)

Best one was a guy asked me how he could date me instead of just hooking up.

I replied that i wouldnt date or sleep with him (just that no reason why etc just that i wouldnt)

He proceeded to reply saying I was rude and that it shows that I was uneducated!

The last I checked me saying i wont date someone doesnt make me rude or uneducated but guys are so bad at handling rejection on here.

I dont bother replying to messages now just block them"

I get called a whore a lot when i politely say no. I really don't think men know the meaning of that word...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What gets me is the ones who after you ignore n delete put a status up naming and saying your rude! Point proven & blocked

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The last one said something like, well you only meet skinny runts with small cocks. Maybe one day you'll fancy real men. How rude! Maybe im partial to runty men with not much downstairs! Hahaha xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What gets me is the ones who after you ignore n delete put a status up naming and saying your rude! Point proven & blocked

I used to read all my messages and save the ones I was interested in replying to when I had more time then doing a bulk delete of my main inbox as its so much quicker than deleting individually. Some guy I was interested in and saved his message did just this thus showing his true colours and giving me one less message to reply to!

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"The last one said something like, well you only meet skinny runts with small cocks. Maybe one day you'll fancy real men. How rude! Maybe im partial to runty men with not much downstairs! Hahaha xx"

Bet your so disappointed you missed out on such a charmer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The last one said something like, well you only meet skinny runts with small cocks. Maybe one day you'll fancy real men. How rude! Maybe im partial to runty men with not much downstairs! Hahaha xx"

I said to one guy I don't like hairy backs he called me a silly girl because only "real men" have hairy backs........

Hmmmmm in the Twilight saga maybe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What gets me is the ones who after you ignore n delete put a status up naming and saying your rude! Point proven & blocked

Ya gotta love those single men!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Haha. I was then forced to tell him a few home truths!

jist no need for rudeness in my opinion xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't get abuse when i did this but i did get chancers message me again days later wanting to 'continue our conversation'. Lol.

Doubt it.

I've got a bad memory but i know who i definitely don't fancy on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well they should be lucky that you replied with a 'no thanks' at all, lol lol it's difficult getting a reply these days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You can't please all the people all the time.

What's reasonable for will be unreasonable for another.

I take a deleted as a polite no thanks. Nothing more to be said.

If receive a written no thanks I reply with a "thanks for taking the time to write back, much appreciated, have fun." And that's the end of it.

Although on one occasion I got a reply to my reply saying "Cunt. Blocked".

I'm assuming it was an insult and not a medical condition.

It was a cry for help from me. Don't worry, I've managed to remove the cucumber from it now

Was it a forced extraction, like when you go to the dentist?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If nothing further is going to happen between you and another person on here any message of any sort is not only a waste of your time, its a waste of their time in reading it, and it suggests you're more inteested than you actually are. Just like with cold calls... you are actually doing them a favour by hanging up on them. It allows them to move quickly on to the next person who may be more interested in what they have to offer.

That's our opinion and we're friggin lovey dovey hippy dippy good vibe people lol

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By *arkman69Man
over a year ago

Erdington

Ive had a few knockbacks.

Ive had a rejection after a social, Ive had a woman say no cos I was too short, lol!

But Ive never been abusive about it. Not everyone's gonna like me (Why not???) but I'm not gonna cry about it. I just say 'ah well', move on and forget about it. Simples

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