FabSwingers.com forum: Does love even exist?

By *icole. OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Paisley

So I use this site to meet some gorgeous men and with my current life situation, no strings fun suits me perfectly...

Obviously meeting regulars, you find out more about them and i found something out today about someone that I just had to get this off my chest.

This guy has a long term gf. We've slept together twice. He's been sleeping with men regularly. He had a lads holiday and slept with 3 girls and is now on a romantic holiday with his mrs.... I feel really sorry for her and just makes me think that in this day and age love doesn't exist.

What do you think?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That doesn't mean love doesn't exist. It just means that he doesn't love her.

Sad story though.

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

Love most certainly exists in my Life, but it obviously doesn't in others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I does. I've had it and it was awesome

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By *anie1000Woman
over a year ago

Staffs

Or maybe he is an alpha male swinger who lives the way he has chosen ?

Janie x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a romantic at heart so for me love definitely exists regardless of age.

I do believe they're are different degrees of love which both parties need to work at to stand the test of time.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"So I use this site to meet some gorgeous men and with my current life situation, no strings fun suits me perfectly...

Obviously meeting regulars, you find out more about them and i found something out today about someone that I just had to get this off my chest.

What do you think?"

Not sure why you would think that one mans actions means that love doesn't exist in this day and age.

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By *icole. OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Paisley

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex."

It's doing it behind her back constantly that makes me feel this way. Also this is just one case of many men I've met over the years.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex.

It's doing it behind her back constantly that makes me feel this way. Also this is just one case of many men I've met over the years. "

Deceiving someone who loves you is wrong I agree but it still doesn't mean that love doesn't exist

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By *icole. OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Paisley

"So I use this site to meet some gorgeous men and with my current life situation, no strings fun suits me perfectly...

Obviously meeting regulars, you find out more about them and i found something out today about someone that I just had to get this off my chest.

What do you think?

Not sure why you would think that one mans actions means that love doesn't exist in this day and age.

This is one man of many others I've met.

When I say this day and age, I mean because there are so many options in front of us that why wouldn't we be tempted to just do whatever with whoever. Times were very different in the 50s.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love does exist. I know cos I've experienced it. I was married for 24 years. Guess I loved her but fell for someone that was only supposed to be fun. I was totally taken in by her. We both felt the same. Left my wife for her and now I'm not with this woman. Still love her so much even though it's been ended by her for 12 months. Kills me inside. So yes I know what love feels like and it bloody hurts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex."

I agree with this.

Sex just fulfils my need for sex and cumming.

Love is something way more than sex, in fact i don't even feel like i have loving sex with people i've loved, it's all just animalistic fucking and enjoying his cock up me. The love is everything else, the bond, the history we have and good times, the fact he cares about me and i care about him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So one guy cheats on his gf and that means love doesn't exist??? Really???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What has sex got to do with real love anyway? I rarely have sex with my hubby but He is the only man I have ever loved and that will never change!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd like to think it does. Thinking that at any moment in my everyday life I might meet someone who is exactly meant for me gets me through when I feel crap or let down by a man.

Not every man cheats on his wife and not every woman cheats on their husband.

If they truly loved one another there would be no need to go sneaking around.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think we'd all live very sad lives if we truly believed love didnt exist...

I had never been in love up until about 1 year ago, I truly thought i loved before but when I really fell I knew that what I experienced before wasn't it. I had my heart broken over and over so decided that I wanted fun ... I couldn't handle having my heart broken again , however .....

I believe in love ( haha I had the darkness' song in my head while writing that) . I think we should all believe in it because it is out there somewhere and when its the right time it'll find you.

For me, I'm happy having fun , should I one day find someone and fall in love again, great. I'm 25, I have plenty of time for that, right now I don't want to have to worry and stress over having my heart broken so I won't even think about it.

Don't let the actions of a minority cloud the appearance of the majority

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I believe that love and sex are two different things, that if with someone you love can be brought together.

Sex is something that if wished you can do with anyone, but to love someone takes a lot and needs the other persons deep involvement.

Thought i was in love recently but decided that it is more than sex at a club and the odd day out, its about honesty and sharing. So heres back to my dream world about love and back to a world of sex x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex."

Totally agree

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Depends on the person, depends on the type of love. I have no doubt at all that the guy who just took me for a mug and lied to me for three months loves his son unconditionally.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sure love exists...it's just 'sophisticated cum sluts' as you define yourself, prob won't get to see it too often.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and this is his side of the story - if hes out and about so much she might be doing the same as him - that might be just the way they work it

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Sure love exists...it's just 'sophisticated cum sluts' as you define yourself, prob won't get to see it too often."

Lol, oooh harsh!

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

It does .....

..... but perhaps not here

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex."

Very true, and who's to say she doesn't get off on hearing about his 'adventures'?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex.

Very true, and who's to say she doesn't get off on hearing about his 'adventures'?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Or maybe he is an alpha male swinger who lives the way he has chosen ?

Janie x"

Alpha male? selfish twat?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in love with someone, but it's unrequited and her love for me back is along the lines of family (so deep in the friend zone it's now family zone and I'm never getting out!) I have been for the last five years. I've tried to get over her, but I can't and when I've been in relationships I feel guilty, as I feel like I'm cheating in the one I love and also that im not putting 100% into the relationship of the person I'm with. So I decide to stay single, have sex with others and still be there for the one I love.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex."

Wise words and so true! Having sex with other people seems to complement and strengthen our married love - so far anyway it has all been positive. Allowing one's partner to act out their fantasies and to have the pleasure of multiple orgasms with multiple partners is a very generous, loving gesture.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So I use this site to meet some gorgeous men and with my current life situation, no strings fun suits me perfectly...

Obviously meeting regulars, you find out more about them and i found something out today about someone that I just had to get this off my chest.

What do you think?

Not sure why you would think that one mans actions means that love doesn't exist in this day and age.

This is one man of many others I've met.

When I say this day and age, I mean because there are so many options in front of us that why wouldn't we be tempted to just do whatever with whoever. Times were very different in the 50s. "

You reckon? It wasn't different - things are just out in the open now

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By *aneandpaulCouple
over a year ago

cleveleys

yes were very much in love

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE

It also implies that this is new behaviour for men (and women) because love existed at some point in the past.

Which we all know is not the case.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I met someone here just over 2 years ago. We finished finally just recently.

Imagine my horror at finding his profile back on here again with veris and then him admitting he'd been meeting people for months. I only came on here initially because his wife told me she'd found him on here a few months back. He cheated on her with me, now he's cheated on me.

Love doesn't exist when you meet someone off a site like this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's easy to get cynical on this site. Although there are loads of singles playing on here because they like being single and the freedom it offers, there are many who are here because they've been hurt in a previous relationship and won't contemplate another or those it to cheat because their relationship has broken down.

But love does exist. Suggest you watch 24 hours in A&E and you'll see it does.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im in this mess too.

How i see it is if they were truely 100% happy they wunt have to look else where. My tattooist has a fiancee and baby, were planning to sleep together next sat. Been talking for the last year as well..

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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago

Wakefield

Does love exist?

Yes, as do soul mates.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does love exist?

Yes, as do soul mates."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes. Love exists. Maybe not for everybody, but certainly for many.....and it isn't the same for everybody either so you can't possibly look at another couple and even begin to understand the complexities of their relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hubby and I swing separately but we don't love one another any less. In fact I'd say we are closer now than ever.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex.

I was assuming he was being deceptive and cheating.

I (personally) feel that love is a choice as well as a feeling. You can lust someone, feel really attracted to them, but for me, love is all of that and more, and inherently part of love (for me) is a choice, every day, to try and respect my partner, to not hurt him.

For me, I couldn't cheat on a guy, lie and sneak around behind his back and still say I love him.

However, I do have a couples profile on here and husband and I play solo and together. That's totally different. There is no deception, guilt and hurt floating about. That isn't love to me.

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By *rsIdiotWoman
over a year ago

Bedworth

"That doesn't mean love doesn't exist. It just means that he doesn't love her.

Sad story though.

It doesn't mean he doesn't love her, he may well love her very deeply. What it does mean is that he's a selfish twat who has no respect for her. Two very different things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes. Love exists. Maybe not for everybody, but certainly for many.....and it isn't the same for everybody either so you can't possibly look at another couple and even begin to understand the complexities of their relationship. "

This makes complete sense - thank you. m x

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By *icole. OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Paisley

"Sure love exists...it's just 'sophisticated cum sluts' as you define yourself, prob won't get to see it too often."

I guess I didn't make myself clear. I'm not looking for it. I'm happy sleeping around.

The question related to when my life slows down to accommodate a relationship. I'm just trying to figure out what the consensus is on how others lead their lives with a partner.

The fact that most of you agree that sex and love are two different things tells me it's okay to sleep around in a relationship.

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By *ovely CummingsWoman
over a year ago

Peaky Nipples

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex."

Love is an emotion, sex is a physical act, by doing the act it can strengthen the emotion

But they are two separate things and anyone with a long term loving relationship will tell you, love, real love, is there even when the sex isn't

And

When the love has developed and grown outside of sex, it's that that keeps people together

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

Yes it does. One person's actions does not define the existence of such things.

I do have to disagree with some of the coments on this thread though (after all, wouldn't it be boring if we all agreed with eachother all of the time?

Yes, I agree that love and sex can live blissfully apart, but I do not agree that love and deceit can go together.

If, as the O.P said, it IS behind her back...

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

"I (personally) feel that love is a choice as well as a feeling. You can lust someone, feel really attracted to them, but for me, love is all of that and more, and inherently part of love (for me) is a choice, every day, to try and respect my partner, to not hurt him.

For me, I couldn't cheat on a guy, lie and sneak around behind his back and still say I love him.

However, I do have a couples profile on here and husband and I play solo and together. That's totally different. There is no deception, guilt and hurt floating about. That isn't love to me."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We been together since 1986 and I still love jools as much now as I did the moment I saw her, I would say our love is deeper now and we have a bond that can only be made through sharing moments of extreme happiness and sadness. Like a friendship it has its ups and downs, but we have learned to except that it's not always going to be fluffy and sometimes it's craggy and uncomfortable.

I think once you realise that a relationship is not always going to be perfect and if you can get over the small issues then if you truly love someone it doesn't matter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It doesn't mean he doesn't love her.

Sex is not love.

Why do so many people think that someone having sex with someone else mean they don't love their partner?

Love is so much more than sex."
I think it means he doesn't love her. Fact he is decieving and lying and not revealling his actions. If you love someone then you don't do that. Love and sex are not the same thing. Love involves trust and truth.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There seems to be more than one sort of love people talk about.

But romantic love is a crock

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I think that people confuse obsession and love, sex and love, ownership and love and hurt and love.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There seems to be more than one sort of love people talk about.

But romantic love is a crock

In your opinion. Which is your right, couldn't disagree more tho.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There seems to be more than one sort of love people talk about.

But romantic love is a crock

In your opinion. Which is your right, couldn't disagree more tho.

if you loved me you wouldnt disagree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There seems to be more than one sort of love people talk about.

But romantic love is a crock

In your opinion. Which is your right, couldn't disagree more tho.

if you loved me you wouldnt disagree

I would, but then give you a cuddle.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

people will do what they have to do to get what they want....

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

Love exists but so does selfishness and betrayal.

Of all my close friends not one gas been untrue to their partner in the last 18 year's.

50% of marriages end in divorce but 50% don't. So one experience does not make a pattern.

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By *andy6677Man
over a year ago

crewe

Love does exist between true soulmates xxx The reason why so many relationships end is because they were not true soulmates xxx. I believe that xxx

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

Also ever relationship is different.

The dynamics of why people get together and get married are vast.

Some people get married without even discussing kids, careers, family, etc.

There are many forms of love and lust isonly on form.

I was my partners friend before we were romantic,

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Love does exist between true soulmates xxx The reason why so many relationships end is because they were not true soulmates xxx. I believe that xxx"

What do you mean by soul mate?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The problem isn't with love it's with the word....it means 'nothing' these days, we love our gadgets, love certain foods, love holidays, the word is banded around willynilly so it has no meaning and feels totally detached from the act of actually loving 'someone' in an exclusive devoted way so when it's said, there's no real deep attachment to the word like there is with hate, I think a lot of us ironically 'love the idea of love' but unfortunately the word love doesn't cover what its intentions and achievements should be...

just my tuppence worth

Lots of love.x

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

"The problem isn't with love it's with the word....it means 'nothing' these days, we love our gadgets, love certain foods, love holidays, the word is banded around willynilly so it has no meaning and feels totally detached from the act of actually loving 'someone' in an exclusive devoted way so when it's said, there's no real deep attachment to the word like there is with hate, I think a lot of us ironically 'love the idea of love' but unfortunately the word love doesn't cover what its intentions and achievements should be...

just my tuppence worth

Lots of love.x"

Exactly.

It's over used. The ancient Greeks had multiple words for love. Each love being different.

I refused to tell bunny I loved when it was simply lust and romance. It was hard to do when she got to loving me before I loved her.

But it was important to me. It brought with it a level of trust. Beyond I just like the look of you and want to fuck.

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By *andy6677Man
over a year ago

crewe

"Love does exist between true soulmates xxx The reason why so many relationships end is because they were not true soulmates xxx. I believe that xxx

What do you mean by soul mate?"

These reasons are what make a soulmate

1. Your soul mate is endlessly loyal to you.

2. Your soul mate is always supportive of you.

3. Your soul mate has a similar guiding compass.

4. Your soul mate sparks an intense passion in you.

5. You can communicate comfortably with your soul mate.

6. Your soul mate makes you feel special.

7. Your soulmate transcends spiritual boundaries with you.

8. Your soul mate appreciates your affection.

9. Your soul mate thinks you’re just irresistible.

10. Your soul mate helps you feel safe.

11. You feel like you can completely trust your soul mate.

12. You don’t just experience their endless love, you feel it.

13. You’re spiritually connected more so to your soul mate than

anyone else.

14. You can spend time sitting in silence but know what your soul

mate is thinking.

15. Even in times of tragedy, you find strength in your soul mate.

16. Your soul mate turns to you with all their secrets, hopes and

dreams.

17. Your soul mate has the same ideas about raising children as you.

18. Your soul mate always includes you in major and minor life

decisions.

19. Your soul mate pushes you to be better and you return that favor.

20. As people, in terms of being happy and successful, you and your

soul mate thrive together.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are so many ways to give and receive love .

Sex is but a small part of the sharing of love between two people in a special relationship.

Sex for a release or to scratch an itch is not love .

If it's the doing it behind a partners back that makes you question it , perhaps it's the doing it this that preserves the loving relationship ?

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE

People change over time. Love is not a given and transient in nature.

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