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Etiquette in the 21st Century

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Well normally this is not something that I would do, complaining or disrupting the status quo. However I feel that this is necessary. To add context to this I have meet with more that my happy share of people from this website and from other sources.

My grievance comes from the lack of manners shown repeatedly by both parties of a conversation, do not be disillusioned this is aimed at all people who use this website.

To set the scene I am a young fit polite person in the employ of the Army I treat people the way I expect to be treated. I do not pretend to be something I am not. I do not deceive or lie, what I tell people is fact not conjecture and this fact alone is what gives me authority to speak on this subject.

To Conclude all I ask is that people take the time to be civil to each other yes we are on here because we are looking for more than friendship or one night stands. That does not except us from manners of common decency. Say "no thanks" to messages sent, I appreciate that most people have more messages than possible to reply to just do what you can. Everybody has feelings that deserve the same respect yours do. Do not lead people on, people who persist - use the block button and most importantly people are sociable creatures don't think the worst before you speak to someone.

I do not care what happens to me, but those I speak for deserve a voice.

Andy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What exactly do you think may happen to you? This isn't the mafia.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well normally this is not something that I would do, complaining or disrupting the status quo. However I feel that this is necessary. To add context to this I have meet with more that my happy share of people from this website and from other sources.

My grievance comes from the lack of manners shown repeatedly by both parties of a conversation, do not be disillusioned this is aimed at all people who use this website.

To set the scene I am a young fit polite person in the employ of the Army I treat people the way I expect to be treated. I do not pretend to be something I am not. I do not deceive or lie, what I tell people is fact not conjecture and this fact alone is what gives me authority to speak on this subject.

To Conclude all I ask is that people take the time to be civil to each other yes we are on here because we are looking for more than friendship or one night stands. That does not except us from manners of common decency. Say "no thanks" to messages sent, I appreciate that most people have more messages than possible to reply to just do what you can. Everybody has feelings that deserve the same respect yours do. Do not lead people on, people who persist - use the block button and most importantly people are sociable creatures don't think the worst before you speak to someone.

I do not care what happens to me, but those I speak for deserve a voice.

Andy"

Others can speak for themselves, soooooo you're just speaking for yourself!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Who are you speaking for?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And for a post entitled etiquette it's quite rude. Ironic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And your status update isn't very polite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And your status update isn't very polite "

The whole profile is pretty aggressive. Coupled with this "women should reply to me" post i reckon he may be having a bad night.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What exactly do you think may happen to you? This isn't the mafia."

Have you not met the swinging godfather? He wears a gimp mask and whacks people with his 10'' dildo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What exactly do you think may happen to you? This isn't the mafia.

Have you not met the swinging godfather? He wears a gimp mask and whacks people with his 10'' dildo "

Ooh! When can I meet him?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sexual frustration is a wonderful thing!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP is a gent and I salute him. x

People have lost their way admit it not in our 'new' digital world.

Were becoming robots.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What exactly do you think may happen to you? This isn't the mafia.

Have you not met the swinging godfather? He wears a gimp mask and whacks people with his 10'' dildo "

Well it's a good job the OP doesn't have any face pics or he might be wearing a concrete condom at the bottom of his local pond!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not here to reply to every message i get sent, i'm here to talk to those i wanna fuck and meet them and fuck them.

Everyone else can fuck off. A la my profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not here to reply to every message i get sent, i'm here to talk to those i wanna fuck and meet them and fuck them.

Everyone else can fuck off. A la my profile."

This

I'm currently considering deleting my profile info and replacing it with "SINGLE MEN CAN FUCK OFF"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not here to reply to every message i get sent, i'm here to talk to those i wanna fuck and meet them and fuck them.

Everyone else can fuck off. A la my profile.

This

I'm currently considering deleting my profile info and replacing it with "SINGLE MEN CAN FUCK OFF" "

I'm trying to delete my inbox while it was quiet and it's just getting filled up again. I got nice messages tbh, i think the fuck off is why though and helps.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a nice idea but it's never going to happen.

Too many morons on here - and yes the majority would appear to be single men who are only here to satisfy their own needs. Would be lovely if some could read profiles before messaging! Those that fail to do so, well I see no problem with giving them their just desserts. I'm done with being polite on here. I'm after a fuck not a Nobel Peace Prize.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Blimey. Lot of anger on this thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey. Lot of anger on this thread."

I'm antipathetic, a la my profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I thought this was going to be a thread about general behaviour these days and not just Fab messaging etiquette.

As a general principle I think society has become a lot more self-focussed - I'll often hold a door open and get absolutely no recognition for it (not that I'm after any) or see people in shops / restaurants ask for stuff with absolutely no 'please' or 'thank you's.

Ironically on Fab I'm less bothered as I understand the rules and appreciate the volume of messages people get.

I do kind of get where the OP is coming from - how many times are we told to write detailed personalised messages and can spend 20-30 minutes on them only for them to be instantly deleted with no reply. At first it can be frustrating / demoralising but once you accept that as the way the site is, your experience on here becomes a whole lot better!

Good luck OP, it sounds like you have good wholesome values in you - but I think you'll need to accept the site etiquette that no reply means 'not interested' and that people can change their minds even after a longer dialogue then move on to get the most from your experience here!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What exactly do you think may happen to you? This isn't the mafia."

We might be

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On another site we were on in the past there was a button on messages that said 'politely say no and delete'

That site appeared to be based on the same forum software as this so wonder if that us an option to add admits for?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

A no reply is a 'no thank you' on Fab.

Etiquette develops....it would be an exciting and fun afternoon to see if there is a positive correlation between the development of manners and the development of machine guns.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe if people read profiles first that would be a good starting point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How dare I not reply to messages like "Come sit on my face" and Ride this young cock"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How dare I not reply to messages like "Come sit on my face" and Ride this young cock" "

Sorry about that, won't happen again..........

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

A no reply IS a no thanks.

People do not owe you a reply just because YOU chose to message them.

Plus, another reason we choose not to respond to all messages is because, unless we block everyone after saying no, if we decide we want to filter single guys for a while, the guys we have responded to are excluded from our filters.

Of course anyone who pestered after being told "No" would be blocked anyway, but still.

Nobody is owed anything on this site and people who display a sense of entitlement are a huge turn off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe if people read profiles first that would be a good starting point."

This!!! I delete ANY message where they haven't bothered looking and I don't see that as ignorant when I've taken the time to add a good selection of photos and list just 3 preferences. They can't be arsed, I can't be either.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How dare I not reply to messages like "Come sit on my face" and Ride this young cock"

Sorry about that, won't happen again.........."

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By *dam_TinaCouple
over a year ago

Hampshire

Your post talks about lack of manners, being polite and civil to each other........

and your status says 'Posted my views as advised, you don't like it then FUCK YOU!'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey. Lot of anger on this thread."

It's the ego's talking...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought this was going to be a thread about general behaviour these days and not just Fab messaging etiquette.

As a general principle I think society has become a lot more self-focussed - I'll often hold a door open and get absolutely no recognition for it (not that I'm after any) or see people in shops / restaurants ask for stuff with absolutely no 'please' or 'thank you's.

Ironically on Fab I'm less bothered as I understand the rules and appreciate the volume of messages people get.

I do kind of get where the OP is coming from - how many times are we told to write detailed personalised messages and can spend 20-30 minutes on them only for them to be instantly deleted with no reply. At first it can be frustrating / demoralising but once you accept that as the way the site is, your experience on here becomes a whole lot better!

Good luck OP, it sounds like you have good wholesome values in you - but I think you'll need to accept the site etiquette that no reply means 'not interested' and that people can change their minds even after a longer dialogue then move on to get the most from your experience here! "

Great post.

OP think of it as a filter. Would you really want to meet a rude person with a massive ego problem?

There are tools to reduce and even stop mail. Some people don't use those tools. It's obvious why they don't....

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

[Removed by poster at 10/05/15 09:00:59]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey. Lot of anger on this thread."

I'm looking at the thread and don't see any anger, more so frustration. If someone has the stupidity to send me a message when they clearly haven't looked at my profile, that's their problem.

Oh and I've met some belters on here (who have inboxed me) so why change my filters?

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By *ristol_MTB_cplCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

As we're not looking for single men (preferences set, profile says looking for couples) I don't see much problem ignoring messages we get from single guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having read the extensive OP......

Is it just another 'why won't you reply to me whine'?

Zzzzzz

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having read the extensive OP......

Is it just another 'why won't you reply to me whine'?

Zzzzzz"

Lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well normally this is not something that I would do, complaining or disrupting the status quo. However I feel that this is necessary. To add context to this I have meet with more that my happy share of people from this website and from other sources.

My grievance comes from the lack of manners shown repeatedly by both parties of a conversation, do not be disillusioned this is aimed at all people who use this website.

To set the scene I am a young fit polite person in the employ of the Army I treat people the way I expect to be treated. I do not pretend to be something I am not. I do not deceive or lie, what I tell people is fact not conjecture and this fact alone is what gives me authority to speak on this subject.

To Conclude all I ask is that people take the time to be civil to each other yes we are on here because we are looking for more than friendship or one night stands. That does not except us from manners of common decency. Say "no thanks" to messages sent, I appreciate that most people have more messages than possible to reply to just do what you can. Everybody has feelings that deserve the same respect yours do. Do not lead people on, people who persist - use the block button and most importantly people are sociable creatures don't think the worst before you speak to someone.

I do not care what happens to me, but those I speak for deserve a voice.

Andy"

You lizard! Accept they aren't interested and move on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well normally this is not something that I would do, complaining or disrupting the status quo. However I feel that this is necessary. To add context to this I have meet with more that my happy share of people from this website and from other sources.

My grievance comes from the lack of manners shown repeatedly by both parties of a conversation, do not be disillusioned this is aimed at all people who use this website.

To set the scene I am a young fit polite person in the employ of the Army I treat people the way I expect to be treated. I do not pretend to be something I am not. I do not deceive or lie, what I tell people is fact not conjecture and this fact alone is what gives me authority to speak on this subject.

To Conclude all I ask is that people take the time to be civil to each other yes we are on here because we are looking for more than friendship or one night stands. That does not except us from manners of common decency. Say "no thanks" to messages sent, I appreciate that most people have more messages than possible to reply to just do what you can. Everybody has feelings that deserve the same respect yours do. Do not lead people on, people who persist - use the block button and most importantly people are sociable creatures don't think the worst before you speak to someone.

I do not care what happens to me, but those I speak for deserve a voice.

Andy

You lizard! Accept they aren't interested and move on"

'Lizard'! Hahahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well normally this is not something that I would do, complaining or disrupting the status quo. However I feel that this is necessary. To add context to this I have meet with more that my happy share of people from this website and from other sources.

My grievance comes from the lack of manners shown repeatedly by both parties of a conversation, do not be disillusioned this is aimed at all people who use this website.

To set the scene I am a young fit polite person in the employ of the Army I treat people the way I expect to be treated. I do not pretend to be something I am not. I do not deceive or lie, what I tell people is fact not conjecture and this fact alone is what gives me authority to speak on this subject.

To Conclude all I ask is that people take the time to be civil to each other yes we are on here because we are looking for more than friendship or one night stands. That does not except us from manners of common decency. Say "no thanks" to messages sent, I appreciate that most people have more messages than possible to reply to just do what you can. Everybody has feelings that deserve the same respect yours do. Do not lead people on, people who persist - use the block button and most importantly people are sociable creatures don't think the worst before you speak to someone.

I do not care what happens to me, but those I speak for deserve a voice.

Andy"

You seem to cofuse etiquette with entitlement. Who are you to tell people how they should and shouldn't use the site?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP.

If you lose the entitlement (of which it is strong) you'll lose your frustration.

You certainly don't speak for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I see more profiles and forum posts whinging about people messaging than any other subject. Frustration or anger it's the same negative emotion. Don't get me wrong I understand why.

One day I'm going to put a post on here saying all single females fuck off just to see if I can beat the reply record. O wait no I'm not cos that would be fucking stupid of me. Yet it's cool the other way round for some reason.

In summary take your own advice. You tell people who don't get replies to ignore and move on. You do the same block the dodgy 1 line Messagers who don't read your profiles and move on.

Or maybe scarlet had a point??

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Lizard?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey. Lot of anger on this thread."

Yes. And it's a big part of the reason why Fab isn't working anymore. Some people haven't got a clue how to deal with others. Absolutely no clue at all.

Massive chips on shoulders show just how ugly people's souls are...and that simply cannot compensate for them looking nice on the outside.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Blimey. Lot of anger on this thread.

Yes. And it's a big part of the reason why Fab isn't working anymore. Some people haven't got a clue how to deal with others. Absolutely no clue at all.

Massive chips on shoulders show just how ugly people's souls are...and that simply cannot compensate for them looking nice on the outside."

Ouch. But I think you maybe right in some cases.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always said there should be a thanks but no thanks button for unread messages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just to bring it back to nice territory, I've made 2 very good friends on here. That's 2 more than I expected, so I don't think fab is broken.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've always said there should be a thanks but no thanks button for unread messages. "

I'm not sure. I've sent a fair few messages and got no reply. That's fine. The ones that have replied with a no thanks I've felt compelled to reply with a thank you for replying message. Take me ages to reply to all the no thanks messages Lmao.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"most importantly people are sociable creatures don't think the worst before you speak to someone.

"

Sometimes tho you don't need to speak to someone before knowing the worst ~ a quick look at a status update message can confirm it.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've always said there should be a thanks but no thanks button for unread messages. "

What will that solve? ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've always said there should be a thanks but no thanks button for unread messages. "

I believe that one was trialled, people complained it was too impersonal and that it if they subsequently put filters on, it meant the person could then bypass the filter

In the end, we do tend to reply because we don't get masses of mail but this seems to be seen as a sign to open up dialogue and why would I waste my time interacting with someone I'm not interested in? I don't do that in my own time in real life, so why should I do it here?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've always said there should be a thanks but no thanks button for unread messages.

What will that solve? ...."

Absolutely nothing. I'm on a site that has that button and the same guys just message over and over or send some abusive message telling how they didn't want to fuck you anyway. It's not the kind of response that gets sent, it's the kind of person the response goes to. The block button is your friend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's not the kind of response that gets sent, it's the kind of person the response goes to. The block button is your friend "

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