FabSwingers.com forum: should we not have feelings

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

someone i got on with really well told me she could'nt meet today or last monday due to normal life stuff.boyfriend trouble and work

Thats fine,i can get that

So when i see the other "life stuff" were meets i was very offended.

this got me thinking

just because we are swingers does that mean we don't get offended when we are lied to?

i hope not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"someone i got on with really well told me she could'nt meet today or last monday due to normal life stuff.boyfriend trouble and work

Thats fine,i can get that

So when i see the other "life stuff" were meets i was very offended.

this got me thinking

just because we are swingers does that mean we don't get offended when we are lied to?

i hope not"

Man up lol..

you have 3 options

Either carry on as is, and continue to be offended, or carry on as is and enjoy yourself on here too..or if you think you can't trust her (interesting that you, yourself are are on a swinging website lol) find yourself another fuck buddy...

Sounds more like you want a relationship with her

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

oh how wrong can someone be haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would you have been ok if she said I'm already meeting someone Monday? I don't feel the need to tell anyone what I'm doing and with whom,but if they can take the truth I will tell them I'm meeting someone else that day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No see I would feel annoyed at being lied too.

Told sorry busy or even got a meet already... Not an issue.

But lied to I would be a bit miffed... More so If it was someone I had started to consider a friend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would you have been ok if she said I'm already meeting someone Monday? I don't feel the need to tell anyone what I'm doing and with whom,but if they can take the truth I will tell them I'm meeting someone else that day. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did she lie? Did you say are you meeting someone else on Monday?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No see I would feel annoyed at being lied too.

Told sorry busy or even got a meet already... Not an issue.

But lied to I would be a bit miffed... More so If it was someone I had started to consider a friend "

Which was why I said man up lol...if you don't like then finish it...simples...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

honesty is the issue here

She can meet whoever whenever

Really no need to lie

Thats what has pissed me off

We swing we meet others thats fine

Just don't tell me you are walking the dog .

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"someone i got on with really well told me she could'nt meet today or last monday due to normal life stuff.boyfriend trouble and work

Thats fine,i can get that

So when i see the other "life stuff" were meets i was very offended.

this got me thinking

just because we are swingers does that mean we don't get offended when we are lied to?

i hope not"

We tend not to get offended but we do avoid that person in future. We try to be as honest as is wise and possible ourselves.

I think that feeling offended isn't something we can help though but it might be a good idea to ask your self why

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just to throw another side to this discussion into the melting pot...she is already in a relationship and cheating...so you know what you are getting yourself into....

I don't meet cheaters, as that is what they always do...so why would she have any qualms about deceiving you...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd be offended too, not because she met someone else but because she lied.

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By *eithoWoman
over a year ago

Chatham

You mention her boyfriend. Is she honest with him? If not, why would you expect honesty from her?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So this issue is instead if saying I have another meet she Saud normal stuff maybe she didn't want to offend so felt easy to just say the latter perhaps ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"someone i got on with really well told me she could'nt meet today or last monday due to normal life stuff.boyfriend trouble and work

Thats fine,i can get that

So when i see the other "life stuff" were meets i was very offended.

this got me thinking

just because we are swingers does that mean we don't get offended when we are lied to?

i hope not"

If we had already arranged a meet with someone then they canceled and met someone else and we had arranged a babysitter, Shaz had got ready and so on yeah we would be a little annoyed as an evening wasted.

If we wanted to meet with someone and they said no, no matter what reason, we wouldn't be annoyed no.

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

"No see I would feel annoyed at being lied too.

Told sorry busy or even got a meet already... Not an issue.

But lied to I would be a bit miffed... More so If it was someone I had started to consider a friend "

same

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By *rank EinsteinMan
over a year ago

Burton upon stather

I'm with the majority here. No point lying about being busy when you're really meeting.

Of course she genuinely might have had plans then had an offer that changed her mind...

To put another side in there's a local lass I've been chatting to a bit and not being pushy which I pride myself on.

We were talking yesterday then suddenly she stopped and a verification popped up on her profile later in the day from a 5 day old unverified profile.

Yes it was annoying that if she wanted a meet she could've asked me who's been putting the time in but just because we've been talking it doesn't mean she owes me anything.

That's kind of the point of the site right, nsa if you want to meet someone you can do... without having to explain yourself to anyone.

Shrug it off and move along, if you want commitment and truth get a relationship and stop talking to attached people.

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By *cottishsexgoddessWoman
over a year ago

Glenrothes

"honesty is the issue here

She can meet whoever whenever

Really no need to lie

Thats what has pissed me off

We swing we meet others thats fine

Just don't tell me you are walking the dog .

I totally get where you're coming from. I hate liars. Either tell me the truth or say nothing at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they already have a meet, or doing the washing or going out, whatever she was doing would be busy would it not? so not really told a lie.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

if she was sparing my feeling then posting the veri within 10 seconds of coming back maybe wasn't the right course of action??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if she was sparing my feeling then posting the veri within 10 seconds of coming back maybe wasn't the right course of action??"

Had you already arranged a meet with her and she let you down or you asked and she said she was busy?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

she did lie

she said monday was boyfriend trouble

today was too tired/walking dog

different kind of dogging maybe

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

"No see I would feel annoyed at being lied too.

Told sorry busy or even got a meet already... Not an issue.

But lied to I would be a bit miffed... More so If it was someone I had started to consider a friend "

Totally this. It's just manners

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd be pissed off at that as well. if i already have one i tell fbs, or guys i want to meet, who asks and they usually tell me to enjoy it or say thanks for letting me know.

Have had one guy hassle me to cancel a meet and meet him instead, felt that was out of order. if she gets a lot of guys like that then i'd understand her not saying anything.

Also, sometimes you don't feel like a meet and then a bit later on you do, especially with the right person. But yeah it would still piss me off and i'd feel messed around i think.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would be annoyed at being lied to

nobody on here owes me anything if they are meeting somebody else all they have to say is sorry I cant meet you Monday I already have a meet arranged, that's fine why say you are doing family stuff if your not, it's an unnecessary lie, all because we are on a swingers site that does not mean we have to forget our manners or what honestly is

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By *amparaWoman
over a year ago

biggleswade

"someone i got on with really well told me she could'nt meet today or last monday due to normal life stuff.boyfriend trouble and work

Thats fine,i can get that

So when i see the other "life stuff" were meets i was very offended.

this got me thinking

just because we are swingers does that mean we don't get offended when we are lied to?

i hope not"
i get were you are coming from with the honesty bit as i feel the same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"she did lie

she said monday was boyfriend trouble

today was too tired/walking dog

different kind of dogging maybe

I don't know what kind of relationship you have or why she lied. Ask her maybe and find out. If she didn't feel comfortable telling you she was meeting someone else and you're ok with it,let her know and next time she can be honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"she did lie

she said monday was boyfriend trouble

today was too tired/walking dog

different kind of dogging maybe

Ahh I see,

I wouldn't be annoyed though, just wouldn't bother asking her again

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By *aisy2012Couple
over a year ago

everywhere

Absolutely spot on. People can (& do) meet who they like but honesty is key. Sexy had a guy asking her to meet him SO many times. When she agreed & it was all arranged she had a last minute message saying the guy couldn't make it due to family problems. Later turned out (from verifications) he was meeting someone else. Fair enough, just blow him out & move on, but an honest approach would have been so much better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A couple of weeks ago we were out and got a message from a guy asking to meet us . He arrived twenty minutes later , we started chatting and his phone went . He said he had to go , fair enough we thought . Half an hour later he messaged back saying he went to meet a single woman on fab who didn't exist , he had been stood up . Did we meet him again , did we fuck . Karma is alive and well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh dear if that was a lady posting it would have been..he's loss..plenty more guys out there etc. Pathetic ladys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh dear if that was a lady posting it would have been..he's loss..plenty more guys out there etc. Pathetic ladys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you'd prefer honesty and I would too. You aren't wrong and I don't know where the feeling things came from

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I wouldn't tell people why we couldn't meet them on a certain date, but I wouldn't lie about it either.

She could have just said she was busy, would you have been ok with that or would you have asked what she was busy doing? Be honest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No see I would feel annoyed at being lied too.

Told sorry busy or even got a meet already... Not an issue.

But lied to I would be a bit miffed... More so If it was someone I had started to consider a friend "

This!

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I be a bit miffed that someone felt the need to lie ,especially if i met them a few times.I'd just move on and probably not meet them again,as i hate any kind of deceit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh dear if that was a lady posting it would have been..he's loss..plenty more guys out there etc. Pathetic ladys

I agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Absolutely spot on. People can (& do) meet who they like but honesty is key. Sexy had a guy asking her to meet him SO many times. When she agreed & it was all arranged she had a last minute message saying the guy couldn't make it due to family problems. Later turned out (from verifications) he was meeting someone else. Fair enough, just blow him out & move on, but an honest approach would have been so much better. "

This REALLY get on my nerves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You mention her boyfriend. Is she honest with him? If not, why would you expect honesty from her?"

My point exactly! If she cheats already with you and obviously other meets, then she is lying to him...why would she be honest with a meet?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I be a bit miffed that someone felt the need to lie ,especially if i met them a few times.I'd just move on and probably not meet them again,as i hate any kind of deceit."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No see I would feel annoyed at being lied too.

Told sorry busy or even got a meet already... Not an issue.

But lied to I would be a bit miffed... More so If it was someone I had started to consider a friend

Totally this. It's just manners

But she has no manners...she is already lying to her boyfriend which OP already knew about when he got involved with her...OP is just a meet to her so why should she be honest?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No see I would feel annoyed at being lied too.

Told sorry busy or even got a meet already... Not an issue.

But lied to I would be a bit miffed... More so If it was someone I had started to consider a friend

Totally this. It's just manners

But she has no manners...she is already lying to her boyfriend which OP already knew about when he got involved with her...OP is just a meet to her so why should she be honest?"

I'd still want a meet to be honest with me regardless! I can't abide liars! It's a sex site there is no reason to lie!

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Apparently not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some swingers are emotionless robots that trawl the world desperately looking for sex and don't give a fuck about human feelings....

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By *L RogueMan
over a year ago

London

"No see I would feel annoyed at being lied too.

Told sorry busy or even got a meet already... Not an issue.

But lied to I would be a bit miffed... More so If it was someone I had started to consider a friend

Totally this. It's just manners

But she has no manners...she is already lying to her boyfriend which OP already knew about when he got involved with her...OP is just a meet to her so why should she be honest?"

She should be honest because people make plans.

Imagine if he had booked a room and it was too late to cancel?

Yes, she cheats and is a liar. We get that. But this is still Fabs. There's no need for that kind of behaviour.

Though I agree that the OP shouldn't meet her again. She's a sloppy liar. One day, her BF is going to catch her and you don't want to be THAT guy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So when i see the other "life stuff" were meets i was very offended.

this got me thinking

just because we are swingers does that mean we don't get offended when we are lied to?

How has she lied?..

Other life stuff could entail meeting someone else.

She HASN'T said "I'm working" or insert whatever reason you like.

How has she lied?..

Lying would be giving you a false excuse, she hasn't done that imo.

She didn't lie to you, she just didn't meet you.

..and before anyone says it, my response would be exactly the same if a single fem had posted this thread too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some swingers are emotionless robots that trawl the world desperately looking for sex and don't give a fuck about human feelings...."

I don't like that sort.

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

"No see I would feel annoyed at being lied too.

Told sorry busy or even got a meet already... Not an issue.

But lied to I would be a bit miffed... More so If it was someone I had started to consider a friend

Totally this. It's just manners

But she has no manners...she is already lying to her boyfriend which OP already knew about when he got involved with her...OP is just a meet to her so why should she be honest?"

The OP doesn't actually say what kind of relationship she has with her boyfriend. 'Boyfriend trouble' could mean they've had a falling out and he's fully aware that she is on here.

At no point has the OP said that she's cheating on anyone. I'm not saying she isn't, but folk round here are far too quick to just assume, aren't they?

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