FabSwingers.com forum: Is it ever truly NSA?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can have NSA yes !

I know what its about and i play by the rules.

Having had a few meets I'd say most ladies can aswell .

But i have met a cpl of ladies that have taken things to hart which i don't understand. If another verification appears they send shitty messages saying why didnt i meet them instead of meeting others or that usay your too busy but u find the time to meet others .

After consideration my thoughts are some people aren't emotionally strong enough for this !

But onthe other hand alot are thank god

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *it of fun cplCouple
over a year ago

village between York and Hull

Yes it can be. MrsH has had a long term lover and we all know the rules and it works out great.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sure everyone has feelings, but NSA for me just means all the fun without the hassle of a relationship. Everyone knows where they stand and anyone is free to say they'd rather not meet anymore without anyone getting upset.

I much prefer to meet people regularly, but it's not always doable, but when I do, we all understand what this is.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x "

I agree!

Especially if you are seeing someone on a regular basis. You get to know each other more, the sex gets better I don't see how you can't get some kind of feelings.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think for many it can be however for some it's very difficult to keep emotions out of it. Personally I would not want cold clinical sex. However the moment you do the snuggles after you risk developing some feelings. Little prangs of jealousy are then quite likely when the person meets others. It's all down to how you communicate. Sending shitty messages is out of line. Though sometimes there have maybe been some pretty mixed signals and it's a reaction. I doubt anyone is totally immune to it happening.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think for many it can be however for some it's very difficult to keep emotions out of it. Personally I would not want cold clinical sex. However the moment you do the snuggles after you risk developing some feelings. Little prangs of jealousy are then quite likely when the person meets others. It's all down to how you communicate. Sending shitty messages is out of line. Though sometimes there have maybe been some pretty mixed signals and it's a reaction. I doubt anyone is totally immune to it happening.

Some great points here and very well put !

Maybe mixed signals are involved.

But on the other hand i wouldnt start a relationship with someone i met on here .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

All my meets are NSA as far as I'm aware. I like them meeting other guys and hardly ever contact except for meet arrangements etc so all good from all concerned. good communication at the start sorted things.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It depends on what "strings" are. To see someone regularly I would need to have some kind of feelings. Friendship is also a relationship.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's perfectly easy to have fairly regular nsa arrangements. I have a couple of guys that I meet. In between we all do whatever we want, when we can schedule a meet we will. We chat occasionally in between meets but don't feel the need to chat everyday....or even every week. Now and then we meet up for sensational sex and then go about our lives until the next time.....i don't think everyone is capable of such an arrangement though, but when you find the right people it's great.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks everyone for your input into the discussion I can see that people have differing _iews on this but that is interesting to see x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't do regular meets

Problem solved

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't do regular meets

Problem solved

For some there is no problem

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

NSA means no long term commitment, you dont have to marry then , just fun buddies ,

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *L RogueMan
over a year ago

London

For some it's possible. For some it's not. I think it's about being honest with yourself and what you want and accepting that others may not feel the same way.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For some it's possible. For some it's not. I think it's about being honest with yourself and what you want and accepting that others may not feel the same way. "

^^Exactly this^^

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can do NSA, with affection as well.

For me, being in a relationship means having to give and take on everything, being considerate to someone else about most decisions in your life, as well as keeping in touch when you can't be together.

NSA is none of the above, it's just sex, and if you're friends as well then that's a nice bonus but it doesn't mean you're going to get involved in each others lives. Out of all the guys i've seen regular on here i only fell in love with one of them and he felt the same but i'm not ready to share my life with other people and be considerate of them, still enjoyed having those feelings for him though but i cut back on being intimate with him coz it wasn't fair to lead him on. If i do ever feel like sharing my life again then things might change wth the NSA stuff. Suppose it's how you feel yourself and what relationships you want that makes it NSA or not?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

yes........

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Yes but that doesn't mean it had to lack passion,lust,excitement and friendship at times

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would agree.

Sex is sex to me and if I have a friendship with the person then great.

Beware, sone people (men and women) associate good sex with emotions and can get attached.

Beware the crazies!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvybrunette91Woman
over a year ago

tidworth

"I can have NSA yes !

I know what its about and i play by the rules.

Having had a few meets I'd say most ladies can aswell .

After consideration my thoughts are some people aren't emotionally strong enough for this !

But onthe other hand alot are thank god

You said 'or that usay your too busy but u find the time to meet others.'

I don't think this preludes to someone not being 'emotionally strong enough for this'. They would probably just rather the honesty than being fobbed off with excuses.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"It depends on what "strings" are. To see someone regularly I would need to have some kind of feelings. Friendship is also a relationship."

Yes, people forget this sometimes - I give normal friends my loyalty and respect and compassion and would do/expect no less from someone I was intimate with on a regular basis! Nsa should not mean hard-hearted in my book.

Whether or not more occurs depends on the dynamic between you. I have met with one or two that were always going to be pure sex and nothing more, others might become friends even after the intimacy stops - like the FB I went to a gig with last week. I am very tactile, and I love having male friends I can touch and hug and dance close with without any awkwardness, it's lovely.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It depends on what "strings" are. To see someone regularly I would need to have some kind of feelings. Friendship is also a relationship.

"
this^^^

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's possible. However I would sooner have some form of conception with anyone I play with. I think NSA on here just implys your not looking for a relationship of any kind. It does not mean your after a quick fuck and go. Imho

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah there's someone i meet once in a While that's totally nsa, given that the end of our meets is a quick copper after playing followed by a "right get out and don't forget anything" :p

We only ever talk when it's to a range a meet. So its nsa FB set up

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x

I agree!

Especially if you are seeing someone on a regular basis. You get to know each other more, the sex gets better I don't see how you can't get some kind of feelings. "

Totally agree! Very difficult to not have any feelings at all when you see someone regularly

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x

I agree!

Especially if you are seeing someone on a regular basis. You get to know each other more, the sex gets better I don't see how you can't get some kind of feelings.

Totally agree! Very difficult to not have any feelings at all when you see someone regularly"

Its very easy if you are already in a loving relationship. My needs for love and affection are already fulfilled so I don't need it from anywhere else. In my opinion that makes it much easier to indulge in NSA. Of course I'm friends with the guys I'm not a heartless bitch but i have no desire whatsoever for anything other than a friendship with fantastic sex.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x "

I think you need to define what you mean by 'strings' because everyone means something different like that.

Do you mean no feelings at all? Because that would kind of suck. Everyone has feelings for someone else in some way, even if they're just friends.

Do you mean no relationship escalator? I have a number of partners who I see on a regularish basis, but we have no plans to move in, get married, have babies etc. And we never will. That's my idea of 'no strings'. But I quite like feeling something for people, I feel things for all my friends.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But on the other hand i wouldnt start a relationship with someone i met on here ."

Surely if you did you'd get the best of both worlds? A relationship AND the freedom to have sex with other people?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x "

Yes it's possible, I have a few regular playmates and not romantically attached to them at all, if theirs any feelings at all, it's just friendship feelings like I have with friends away from this site

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andy6677Man
over a year ago

crewe

Hard not to have feelings when you have sex xx But i respect boundaries and if someone only wants a nsa or fb arrangement then thats fine with me xxx I would like to think one day i will meet the one woman for me but we have an open realtionship so we swing with select othere xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...

Do you mean no feelings at all? Because that would kind of suck. Everyone has feelings for someone else in some way, even if they're just friends.

..."

This.

I think sometimes people assume 'feelings' has to mean love and romance. Affection and caring for someone is surely going to be there if you meet someone often. It doesn't mean bunny boiling.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But on the other hand i wouldnt start a relationship with someone i met on here .

Surely if you did you'd get the best of both worlds? A relationship AND the freedom to have sex with other people?"

Not all people are capable of ployamory. While they may be happy with multiple sexual partners thw idea of multiple emotional partners is not something they would enjoy or seek.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x

I agree!

Especially if you are seeing someone on a regular basis. You get to know each other more, the sex gets better I don't see how you can't get some kind of feelings.

Totally agree! Very difficult to not have any feelings at all when you see someone regularly

Are your needs for sex met by others? Do you not

have sex with your husband?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But on the other hand i wouldnt start a relationship with someone i met on here .

Surely if you did you'd get the best of both worlds? A relationship AND the freedom to have sex with other people?

Not all people are capable of ployamory. While they may be happy with multiple sexual partners thw idea of multiple emotional partners is not something they would enjoy or seek. "

Ployamory - Freudian slip ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x

I agree!

Especially if you are seeing someone on a regular basis. You get to know each other more, the sex gets better I don't see how you can't get some kind of feelings.

Totally agree! Very difficult to not have any feelings at all when you see someone regularly

Are your needs for sex met by others? Do you not

have sex with

your husband? "

My needs for sex are met by my husband. The sex I have with others enhances what I have with my husband for both of us. It's like the icing on the cake.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not all people are capable of ployamory. While they may be happy with multiple sexual partners thw idea of multiple emotional partners is not something they would enjoy or seek. "

I didn't suggest that. I suggested that starting a relationship with someone on a swinging site would mean that they could continue swinging.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But on the other hand i wouldnt start a relationship with someone i met on here .

Surely if you did you'd get the best of both worlds? A relationship AND the freedom to have sex with other people?"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x "

Yes it's possible to meet people regularly and it still be nsa. That doesn't mean we are cold or unfriendly, we have been meeting some people for a few years.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"It's perfectly easy to have fairly regular nsa arrangements. I have a couple of guys that I meet. In between we all do whatever we want, when we can schedule a meet we will. We chat occasionally in between meets but don't feel the need to chat everyday....or even every week. Now and then we meet up for sensational sex and then go about our lives until the next time.....i don't think everyone is capable of such an arrangement though, but when you find the right people it's great."

This pretty much sums us up.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never had reg nsa, just one offs lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeh always nsa for us

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *L RogueMan
over a year ago

London

Not all people are capable of ployamory. While they may be happy with multiple sexual partners thw idea of multiple emotional partners is not something they would enjoy or seek.

I didn't suggest that. I suggested that starting a relationship with someone on a swinging site would mean that they could continue swinging."

Makes sense. But sometimes that's not the case. Some people get very attached...and possessive.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *L RogueMan
over a year ago

London

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x

I think you need to define what you mean by 'strings' because everyone means something different like that.

Do you mean no feelings at all? Because that would kind of suck. Everyone has feelings for someone else in some way, even if they're just friends.

Now that makes sense!

While I'm not ruling out the "escalator," I'm not pursuing it here.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *.nottsbloke..Man
over a year ago

the vale

No strings but sometimes rope or cuffs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning Everyone!

I have never had a NSA arrangement, it has always been relationships of a one time thing.

My questions is, can there ever be NO strings attached when people meet on a regular basis. Has anyone done this in the past and how did it work out? Surely everyone is susceptible to feelings? x "

To be absolutely honest , we doubt there can be a truly nsa relationship if it's a regular thing . We are all people with feelings , which will inevitably develop when more time is spent with another person on a regular basis .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

NSA is the only way for me. I have a few regular FB's and I consider them friends but there is absolutely no attachment! My hubby is the only guy I love and that will never change

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...

Do you mean no feelings at all? Because that would kind of suck. Everyone has feelings for someone else in some way, even if they're just friends.

...

This.

I think sometimes people assume 'feelings' has to mean love and romance. Affection and caring for someone is surely going to be there if you meet someone often. It doesn't mean bunny boiling.

Totally agree^

Friendship and caring about someone is hard not to do when you see someone a lot! It doesn't mean your in love or wanting a relationship!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread