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Swinging club etiquette.

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By *om and Lisa OP   Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

We've been to a couple of clubs, but only a couple of times. But even from that, it seems that there are a lot of people who really need a drink before they feel comfortable doing anything.

That's totally fine, but after they've had a drink, they tend to get a bit loud and some of the guys get a bit boisterous.

Also, no that much of an issue, in the bar areas.

But when it extends to the rooms, it's just a bit off putting.

A few times now, we've been in a room with a couple or a small group, and things have been moving slowly, and as we're really starting to get in to it, a group (really tends to be at least two couples) come in and start chatting on, doing a running commentary.

Again, it's cool. we should really get organised and suggest going to a private room, where we can lock the door. But often, another couple has started things alone and others have just joined them, so it would really break things up to get dressed, head somewhere else (downstairs, or up) then try to recreate the mood...

feeling like a real Victor Meldrew at the minute, and I really don't mean to, but it was just a bit over the top last night. Totally off-putting.

Had to listen to a woman going on about squirting ("AYE, AN' 'E FRIGGED IZ SO FUCKIN' HARD A' SQORTED ALL OWER THA WALL")for about 20 minutes.

Again, it wouldn't have been so bad, but it was the same 20 second story, repeated about 40 times. Seriously.

Maybe swinging clubs could intro a 'quiet' room?

Or maybe people who want to cackle on like witches and blast their mouths off about SQORTING ON WALLS could just stay in the social areas and get as d*unk as they like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha, this made me chuckle.

Hope your next experience is better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We've been to a couple of clubs, but only a couple of times. But even from that, it seems that there are a lot of people who really need a drink before they feel comfortable doing anything.

That's totally fine, but after they've had a drink, they tend to get a bit loud and some of the guys get a bit boisterous.

Also, no that much of an issue, in the bar areas.

But when it extends to the rooms, it's just a bit off putting.

A few times now, we've been in a room with a couple or a small group, and things have been moving slowly, and as we're really starting to get in to it, a group (really tends to be at least two couples) come in and start chatting on, doing a running commentary.

Again, it's cool. we should really get organised and suggest going to a private room, where we can lock the door. But often, another couple has started things alone and others have just joined them, so it would really break things up to get dressed, head somewhere else (downstairs, or up) then try to recreate the mood...

feeling like a real Victor Meldrew at the minute, and I really don't mean to, but it was just a bit over the top last night. Totally off-putting.

Had to listen to a woman going on about squirting ("AYE, AN' 'E FRIGGED IZ SO FUCKIN' HARD A' SQORTED ALL OWER THA WALL")for about 20 minutes.

Again, it wouldn't have been so bad, but it was the same 20 second story, repeated about 40 times. Seriously.

Maybe swinging clubs could intro a 'quiet' room?

Or maybe people who want to cackle on like witches and blast their mouths off about SQORTING ON WALLS could just stay in the social areas and get as d*unk as they like. "

we agree with you. hate it when they have to get d*unk to play too.

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By *om and Lisa OP   Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

I'm sure it will be.

Earplugs. Earplugs are the future.

You've heard of the silent disco, now try the silent swingers club.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

See I would tell them to be quiet or go back to the social areas or the bar because they were making my fanny dry up with their inane chat

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"I'm sure it will be.

Earplugs. Earplugs are the future.

You've heard of the silent disco, now try the silent swingers club. "

This has made me laugh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kind of have to agree. We were in the couple room with friends last night, enjoying each others company, when a couple of girls came in with their 'catches' and headed to separate areas of the room. From then on all four of them were cackling and holding a loud conversation right across the room, which put us off.

To cap it, one of the girls was on the same play bed as us and was so fake and objectionable. At one point telling the guy in a loud voice "your cocktail is too big for me!" (He wasn't that big from what we saw.)

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By *om and Lisa OP   Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

I'd love to tell someone to be quiet, and in most other situations, I'd be the first to do so.

But, I just imagine it escalating, especially with horny d*unks.

And then my mind flashes to me trying to argue with my willy flapping about... And so I NEVER say anything.

it's what scares me most about being burgled. Having to confront someone in the nudey, while fun in the local paper, would be difficult to take serious in the moment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"See I would tell them to be quiet or go back to the social areas or the bar because they were making my fanny dry up with their inane chat "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd hate my fanny to dry up

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By *layfull pairingCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Totally agree with the inane loud conversation comments... Even in private rooms (which are often just partitioned off with plasterboard) you can still overhear conversations outside... i recall being in a private room with another couple where we all ended up giggling like kids listening to a group outside discussing their views on bdsm (who clearly had never done it) ... Funny tho....

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By *ilke0131Couple
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Totally agree. And the music! What happened to slow, sexy and seductive? All the loud techno just doesn't compare to the slinky. J and A.

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By *orn_To_PerformCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

We have visited several clubs and all seem to have the same problems; A fifty-something wannabe superstar DJ playing the latest Ministry of Sound drum n bass tunes. Interior design styling cues taken from a Skegness funfair and a slum landlord (complete with a pervasive smell of damp and mould). Drinks at hotel mini bar prices - with a similar amount of choice. A number of d*unken customers who would consider Magaluff to be an upmarket holiday destination...

Ok, that's a little OTT , but all the clubs we've been to seem to lack any sort of erotic atmosphere. Definitely Fifty Sheds of Grey...

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By *nterracial2Couple
over a year ago

Ribble Valley

Completely understand. Our local club has put signs up to stop this from happening, non compilers are told off and sent away from the said areas. A gentle comment saying we really don't want to hear about your speeding fine etc, please keep it down for the mood also does the trick, they quickly realise they're in the wrong!

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By *dventuroususCouple
over a year ago

sunderland

Have had similar on one occasion, didnt no if they were couples or singles meeting up, but a large group sat in the bar all night, (nothing wrong with that) but then late on the whole group together, (about 10 people) proceeded to tour the club room by room, loudly entering, laughing messing about, spoiling the atmosphere, then leaving and moving on to the next room, probably made for a good night for them but spoilt it for everyone else.

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By *kyhighstilettoCouple
over a year ago

Cheltenham

We had a situation where we were in a locked room with another couple, but there was a viewing window made of mesh so you could clearly hear people outside.

One woman spent 5 minutes at the mesh loudly begging to be let in.

She was clearly inebriated so we did our best to ignore her but it was really unedifying. Thankfully we were rescued by someone who turned out to be her husband literally dragging her away, heckling us as as she went.

No, we're not down with drinking in these situations

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree it is frustrating when: clothed couples or groups use the clubs as a social night out and in the open play rooms start talking about the action or start talking in loud voices about something completely relevant. Additionally when in open play rooms foursomes having finished playing start doing the socialising and getting to know each other whilst others are playing.

This is different I would suggest to people about what they are doing when they are doing it in private rooms, as we all get off in different ways. I was rendered with my partner incable of continuing due to the loud male and female animal noises coming from the adjacent private room, but that is there right, some people do animal noises, others like running commentary. It is not a library! But in public play areas discretion and less is more should be the case.

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