FabSwingers.com forum: Married !

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I am married and no my other half doesn't know ! I have been honest on my profile and said this, have not pretended to be single.....

Why is it that most of the ladies and lots of couples won't entertain the idea of playing with a married man , however they are more than happy to play with a married female in the same situation ??

what happened to sexualequality !!!lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cant believe you want to cheat on Princess Fiona!!! bet Donkey is in on this too!!!!

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By *imnher2Woman
over a year ago

watford

for us its not that its a single guy its the fact we only play with other couples we feel its best 2 play as a couple and we would also not entertain single ladies

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Donkey is the worst !!! he has even crossed same species borders.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you, i appreciate your honesty. There does however seem to be a certain amount of double standards on here as i said. I have a very good friend on here and she is married too, however no couple have ever turned her down for being married !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am married and no my other half doesn't know ! I have been honest on my profile and said this, have not pretended to be single.....

Why is it that most of the ladies and lots of couples won't entertain the idea of playing with a married man , however they are more than happy to play with a married female in the same situation ??

what happened to sexualequality !!!lol

Easy to explain there are loads of single males, and few single females .

Nothing really to do with what you said

We for instance dont have a problem with single married people (as long as they are honest and state this as you do) and neither do a lot of other couples

Your problem is the same for 99% of single males and is little to do with the fact that you are married

Chin up lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my opinion if you play with an attached guy they get they get caught!

Dont fancy some mad wifey knocking on my door, givin me grief! lol and im sure some would agree.

Women are clever you will get caught! haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Actually since i read and answered your post i have actually looked at your profile

You state in your post that on your profile you say you are married

When i actually read your profile you have removed the fact that you are married

I have to say that honesty is the best policy in our opinion and being as though we didnt at first know your marital status we all do now

Maybe you should have kept quiet from the start?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i would not play with married woman or man, ur all lying cheaters just one has a cock and other has fanny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kitty, that's a very sweeping statement to make when you arent aware of the reasons why married people choose to have sex outside their marriage.x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/05/09 23:36:20]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my opinion if you play with an attached guy they get they get caught!

Dont fancy some mad wifey knocking on my door, givin me grief! lol and im sure some would agree.

Women are clever you will get caught! haha "
have to agree with issy baby!!! iv had irrate wives n gfs ont fone to me!!! so i got sense and i no longer see attached guys!!!! x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would like to say that, as a married man, in a sexless marriage, I waited for over 18 months before thinking about looking elsewhere.

I am not proud of the fact, but have been honest on my profile, I am not pushy, nor agressive when I receive a thanks but no thanks,I have made some good friends on the site, even though as yet I have not mat with any of then, if it happens, it happens, if it doesn't, then so be it.

Only time will tell.

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By *1dKingColeMan
over a year ago

east london

May be jumping to conclusions but using the name ‘Gruffelo’ suggests an awareness of young children’s books.

Play away and in the end it will come back to haunt you, then what will you say to the children in your life?

As for double standards, it’s a case that for some guys something is better than nothing. Not double, lowered.

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By *igBunnyWoman
over a year ago

My Town

I am 100% single and wouldn't dream about asking if a potential "friend" is married.

I really don't care. I don't want to keep them afterwards!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I cant believe you want to cheat on Princess Fiona!!! bet Donkey is in on this too!!!!"

lmao, that made me laugh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kitty, that's a very sweeping statement to make when you arent aware of the reasons why married people choose to have sex outside their marriage.x"

dont care what the excuse is, they lie to their partners and are cheating on them so i dont see how its a sweeping statment more of a fact.

always makes me laugh when people say they are truthfull on their profile. try being truthfull to the person your cheating on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kitty, that's a very sweeping statement to make when you arent aware of the reasons why married people choose to have sex outside their marriage.x"

i wouldnt say its a sweeping statement, thats just kittys opinion, a lot of ppl feel like that. i agree with kitty on this one .

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By *olymanMan
over a year ago

south london

Originally posted in "Why do single attached guys..." thread... but think it may be relevant here....

First of all, I believe the original Q was "why do you supposedly single but actually attached/married guys do it?"... well as we've heard the reasons are probably as many as those doing it... but I think that part of the issue with the early part of the thread is the fact that the OP attempts to answer it's own question (A,B & C). The OP itself implies the anwser "because they're cheats" and perhaps pre-empts any genuine answers.

After all anyone being deceptive is already going to feel judged and perhaps if you are being deceptive (to other site users) you aren't going to respond to the Q at all.

There have been a few responses from those who are open about their deception of their partners and they should be applauded for their openness and honesty to this community.. It is a shame for them that they find themselves to be in situations where they feel the need to decieve those they clearly love.

I am one of those users who chooses to play as single, while being attached, my profile clearly states this... However in my case I am Polyamorous, and the basis of my two committed relationships is one of an open sexual arrangement... However in one of those relationships (some 16 years duration) my partner chooses to be sexually monogamous with me despite her freedom to choose otherwise. In the other (4 1/2 years duration), my partner has a long distance relationship which consists of cybersex and occasional meets when her other partner visits this country.

She meets him alone with my consent and on a couple of occasions we've been in a 3, and a 4 with another of his "buddies". He himself is married and plays without his wife's knowledge (officially, though my suspicion is that she turns a blind eye). In his case this arose from his wife's loss of libido following a fatal (not to her, obviously) car accident many years ago.

With this second partner I have also attended (and intend to again) a rather excellent swingers club in Rotterdam. However because of her occupation, she chooses not to be involved with the scene in this country.

Along with my 2 commited relationships I have several NSA partners all of whom are aware of my polyamorous status, they are all very busy people and liasons with them are very occasional.

Each of my sexual relationships is unique, and there is a great deal of love and understanding involved (even in the more casual ones).

My own personal need for variety, due to my very wide range of of sexual appetites is for me the reason why i decided to join FAB, believing that here I could more easily find the type of partners that I seek. In general I have no difficulty in finding partners even in the street, and while some of my longer term casual relationships have come about this way, I got the idea that I can find partners with particular sexual interests more easily on a website (though I'm begining to question this... lol).

The point of all this... well I hope it helps to illustrate that we are all varied and all have our reasons for the choices we make in life, even the more questionable ones.

And finally that we should "Judge not lest we be judged ourselves" so to speak...

And NO I'm not at all religious....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wasn't going to reply to this thread but after reading your opening post then looking at your profile, I felt compelled to do so ....

Where in your profile does it say that you are married ??? I certainly cannot see any mention of it.

But your minor indiscretion apart, we wouldn't play with anyone if we knew that they were cheating. We are 100% honest in our relationship and therefore would not be very happy knowingly 'aiding and abetting' for the want of a better phrase, someone to hurt their by cheating on them - it's just not our style and I suspect a lot of other people will feel the same way

Cheating, in our opinion, is gutter behaviour - the lowest of the low, but that's only our opinion - one of many 1000's .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i wouldnt meet a married guy simply because i have been in a relationship in the past where my partner cheated on me, i remember how hurt i was and theres no way i could do that to another woman, swinging is about fun and cheating on someone is not fun, you say your honest but your being honest to the wrong people!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What about if spouse is unable to communicate/participate both verbally and physically due to illness? Open and honest discussions are unable to take place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with Redhot your profile does not say you are married at all. If you are in a sexless loveless marriage leave find someone else. I have had affairs with married men over the years but they were full blown affairs, not from the swinging scene.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

what i'd like to know is how comes you can accommodate if your married and meeting behind her back?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kitty, that's a very sweeping statement to make when you arent aware of the reasons why married people choose to have sex outside their marriage.x

dont care what the excuse is, they lie to their partners and are cheating on them so i dont see how its a sweeping statment more of a fact.

always makes me laugh when people say they are truthfull on their profile. try being truthfull to the person your cheating on. "

i 100% agree with you kitty, there is no excuse to cheat on your partner, i'm just sat here thinking of what excuse would be ok for me if i found out my hubby was playing away!! cant think of any that would make it ok!! id sooner him be honest to me and leave if he wasnt happy than be honest to everyone else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you accom when wife isnt there that nmust mean you have fun in the marital bed when she walks in early be ready for fireworks cos the bed is sacred ground id cut davids ball off if i caught him cheeting in our bed with out my consent xxxx

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"Kitty, that's a very sweeping statement to make when you arent aware of the reasons why married people choose to have sex outside their marriage.x"

We would never play knowingly with attached persons of either sex.

Cheating is cheating, regardless of whether they are male or female.

There is no justifiable reason to cheat in my book. I've heard every excuse in the sun, from sexless marriage, illness, can't afford to divorce, not leaving cus of the kids........ blah blah.

If anyone who is in a relationship has to join a swinging/sex/dating site to 'get their leg over', they are in the wrong relationship.

You get one life and if there are aspects of that life that stink..... change them.

Don't infest the swinging world with cheating.......... Swinging is about truth, honesty, fun, sexual liberation.

Not about looking over your shoulder just in case some irate spouse comes looking for those that have corrupted their partner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I gave a reason (fact adduced argument) rather than an excuse (trying to lessen blame) as to why some people choose to have sex outside of marriage.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think the main reason most 'swingers' don't like 'cheaters' is because its not the same thing, as its already been stated swinging is about being open and honestly to the ones who matter!! i don't think swinging should be just for couples, i think singles play a very big part in swinging, but singles should be single, its all a matter of each to their own, i have a female friend who only meets married guys because she thinks they safer so far as they not want more from you than sex, i dont agree with that myself, i think if a guys in a marrage where hes willing to cheat he could fall for you just as easily as a single guy, i personally just feel that doing anything that could hurt another person is wrong and not what swinging is about, next time your considering meeting a married person behind their partners back just stop for 30 seconds and think how you would feel if you was that partner, treat others as you'd like to be treat yopurself

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"I gave a reason (fact adduced argument) rather than an excuse (trying to lessen blame) as to why some people choose to have sex outside of marriage."

Thats what makes us all so different and the world an interesting place.

I PERSONALLY, don't think that there can be a fact based reason why people cheat..... I PERSONALLY think that cheating will always be an excuse for not having the balls to get out of a relationship.........

But that's me. Each to their own as they say.

Life is about being happy...... not about looking over your shoulder or lying your way through the week.

Some people will play with marrieds (of either sex), some won't. It's freedom of choice which we should all be entitled to, the same as free will.........

But it just gets my goat that attached people think that swinging is an easy option.

It spoils it for those of us that swing because it's about sexual liberation, nothing more, nothing less.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I gave a reason (fact adduced argument) rather than an excuse (trying to lessen blame) as to why some people choose to have sex outside of marriage.

Thats what makes us all so different and the world an interesting place.

But that's me. Each to their own as they say.

Life is about being happy...... not about looking over your shoulder or lying your way through the week.

Some people will play with marrieds (of either sex), some won't. It's freedom of choice which we should all be entitled to, the same as free will.........

But it just gets my goat that attached people think that swinging is an easy option.

It spoils it for those of us that swing because it's about sexual liberation, nothing more, nothing less."

so its not about getting your end away

i knew there was more to it thanks

lol

to me if a guy wants to cheat why not go to a parlor or be honest with his wife and both join a club we have spoken to a few single guys on here who say they up for it but wife isnt makes me wonder why should my wife play with them when there wife is sat at home thinking he is working late i feel sorry for the women and men who have to do this id be a gibbering wreck if i found out my mrs was sneeking around and then saying she loved me when she got home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We always ask at clubs if the single guy who is talking to us is married or in a realationship

If they are honest all the better, not saying that that is right, and its not up too us to judge.

But thats our opinion.

AND THAT IS JUST AT CLUBS WE WOULD NEVER KNOWINGLY SEE AN ATTACHED PERSON AT ANY OTHER TIME

We respect people being honest with us above everything else

As we try to be honest with them

What has really pissed us off and its happened twice at chams and once at another club

In all instances we have asked the single male if he is in a relationship or married in all three cases they said yes so we said does your wife know you swing and does she swing

They all replied that their wife didnt know and they would never bring their wife to a place like this

All three found it puzzling when we walked away lol

Craig x

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"We always ask at clubs if the single guy who is talking to us is married or in a realationship

If they are honest all the better, not saying that that is right, and its not up too us to judge.

But thats our opinion.

AND THAT IS JUST AT CLUBS WE WOULD NEVER KNOWINGLY SEE AN ATTACHED PERSON AT ANY OTHER TIME

We respect people being honest with us above everything else

As we try to be honest with them

What has really pissed us off and its happened twice at chams and once at another club

In all instances we have asked the single male if he is in a relationship or married in all three cases they said yes so we said does your wife know you swing and does she swing

They all replied that their wife didnt know and they would never bring their wife to a place like this

All three found it puzzling when we walked away lol

Craig x"

Ooohhh tell me about it. They are so fecking pious.

I was talking to a single male the other day, who told me that he was looking for a relationship with a (and I quote), "nice, normal girl."

When I asked was 'nice' and 'normal' was, he stated that it wouldn't be with anyone who had ever swung because that would mean they had been 'round the block' a few times.

I pointed out that I'd met Jason at a swinging club and he replied that obviously that was different cus Jason was a swinger!!!!!

I mean..... WTF??????

He then asked......"you're not going to meet me now are you?" He went on to ask why.

FFS......!!!!!!

I just deleted and blocked him on here and msn. Strangely enough, the hypocritical idiot still has meet requests up most days.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep Mad they dont think

We are not what everyone is looking for but if you look at our profile we are as honest as we can be

This is important to us

But unfortunatly in all our swinging years we have met some really sad liars

The majority of people are great but the bad apples are very sad

Hope that makes sence lol

Craig xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am in a very loving, but sexless, marriage. Although my hubby doesn't know what I am doing we have spoken about it several times. I know for a fact he would rather I do it quietly without it affecting our family life than leave him to do it. So although I am cheating on him, this is preferable to us both than splitting up our family for the sake of some sexual experiences that I choose to have. I am not intending on having a full blown affair with anyone. I just want some fun sex.

Also, I have met the OP, and he is a sweet guy who just wants some fun.

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"I am in a very loving, but sexless, marriage. Although my hubby doesn't know what I am doing we have spoken about it several times. I know for a fact he would rather I do it quietly without it affecting our family life than leave him to do it. So although I am cheating on him, this is preferable to us both than splitting up our family for the sake of some sexual experiences that I choose to have. I am not intending on having a full blown affair with anyone. I just want some fun sex.

Also, I have met the OP, and he is a sweet guy who just wants some fun."

No offence, but there are sites geared to chating husbands and wives.

why not use them? Why use a swinging site?

What you are doing is not swinging, it's cheating and for those of us that don't believe that cheaters should wear the swingers hat, that's generally what our problem is!

As I said, no offence meant but MaritalAffair.co.uk and Lonelywivesaffairs.com are both sites that would cater for your needs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am on a married dating site too. But have enjoyed some parties from this site too. I guess I like one on ones and group stuff, so want it all! I also want my husband (who incidentally has been unable to give me sex for 5 years)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Wow ! i thought it would be a good topic , however all i seem to have done is rubbed some people up the wrong way !!!

If your taking things to the letter of the law about relationships etc then surely swinging is also wrong ! albeit with each others agreement, by having sex with others is wrong too, no matter if they know or not.

I accomodate in hotels when i am away, never at m home. And for those still judging we did swing as a couple !

Thank you Helenshobbies XX

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

just checked my profile as you had me concerned that i had not indeed said i was married, however in the marital stauts bit it does say "married "

Also if i mail someone new i will also tell them upfront in the opening mail.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I can't see where it says you are married? maybe only you can see that bit of your profile and thast why it was questioned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can't see where it says you are married? maybe only you can see that bit of your profile and thast why it was questioned

I think it was written in ivisible ink ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wow ! i thought ....bla bla bla If your taking things to the letter of the law about relationships etc then surely swinging is also wrong ! bla bla ba "

Swinging isn't wrong provide all parties know anout it and are in agreement with it..

However Cheating and deciet is most certainly wrong in any form

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"just checked my profile as you had me concerned that i had not indeed said i was married, however in the marital stauts bit it does say "married "

Also if i mail someone new i will also tell them upfront in the opening mail."

Nowhere on your profile does it say married.

Strangely, one of your verifications actually says on her profile.......Not into marrieds!

Strange that!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my opinion if you play with an attached guy they get they get caught!

Dont fancy some mad wifey knocking on my door, givin me grief! lol and im sure some would agree.

Women are clever you will get caught!

haha "

lmao (hope its ok to join in im fairly new to here) have had the exp of a mad wifey knocking on my door not fun.

im in same situation and had a couple sort of have a go at me for it so dont think its just men it happens too

m xxx

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"In my opinion if you play with an attached guy they get they get caught!

Dont fancy some mad wifey knocking on my door, givin me grief! lol and im sure some would agree.

Women are clever you will get caught!

haha

lmao (hope its ok to join in im fairly new to here) have had the exp of a mad wifey knocking on my door not fun.

im in same situation and had a couple sort of have a go at me for it so dont think its just men it happens too

m xxx "

Welcome to the forums....

The mad wifey's are a nightmare. I think many of us have had one at some point.

Women are vicious, unbending and blind and deaf to the fact that their husbands are the cheaters... they always want to blame the 'other' woman.

Which is why I don't believe cheaters, of either sex, should join swinging sites.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i thought i would add my pennys worth!!

i have started a few threads like this and answered in many others i joined fabs on recommendation from a couple who said that there is a lot of couples who prefer to play with married men as we are safe and won't cause them any hassle!!

i cheat for the thrill, i'm addicted to that and my mrs knows how i feel and we have discussed many times over many years, about swinging as a couple but she just dosen't want to, so i made the decision to go behind her back and meet people, yes its wrong and i fully respect peoples opinions and if i start talking to a couple or female and they say no because i'm married then i respect that and walk away, i do have on my profile that i'm married and always check with people they know i'm married before we go any further.

But maybe one good thing to come from joining fabs is i have realised that its not all about sex and i get a thrill now out of chatting to new people and making some great friends, including some ladies who hate married men !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

everyone is entitled to there opinion but i think sometimes in life things arent that easy. i would have never believed that i could cheat until about 4 yrs ago. what i dont need as a married fem playing here alone is a lecture which ive had ppl message me and do lol

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"everyone is entitled to there opinion but i think sometimes in life things arent that easy. i would have never believed that i could cheat until about 4 yrs ago. what i dont need as a married fem playing here alone is a lecture which ive had ppl message me and do lol"

No one has the right to verbally abuse you, especially in private mail.

However, you must expect a certain amount of backlash on the forums, after all, it is a debating area.

I've been the worlds worst for having a pop at people for being married. I don't believe that cheaters should join swinging sites, but thats me.

I just wish that people would be honest. I've been married 3 times because my two previous marriages were unhappy. I've got 3 grown up children who went through 2 divorces with me.

But I don't regret a thing. I've married a swinger who I met in a club and I've never been so happy.

I just wish people would see that we all have one life and we ALL deserve to be happy in every area of our lives.

I may have been, and I still may be a lot of things, but one thing I have never been is dishonest. My dignity is intact and I can look at myself with pride.

Something, I suspect, that cheaters can't do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if only life was that simple! but yes i expect the debate in forums not in private messages to me. still there is te delete button lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just wish some people would give their opinions, but also respect what choices we have made. I have my opinions on single and married people swinging!! good and bad, but i respect they made that decision and would never dream of abusing someone for it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"just wish some people would give their opinions, but also respect what choices we have made. I have my opinions on single and married people swinging!! good and bad, but i respect they made that decision and would never dream of abusing someone for it"

why dont ur respect your wifes choice of choosing to be in a faithfull marrage and stop cheating on her? or is she the only person u choose to disrespect?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

proves my point!!! its my life and i made that choice!!

Kitty we have had our run ins in the past, but would never dream of attacking u for the way u live your life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"proves my point!!! its my life and i made that choice!!

Kitty we have had our run ins in the past, but would never dream of attacking u for the way u live your life"

now now, u stated about respect and stuff and i just wondered why the only person u are disrespecting is the person who you made vows to. what makes her less important for u to cheat on and disrespect but u speak onpenly about respecting people on a swingers site.

its not an attack its a quiestion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"proves my point!!! its my life and i made that choice!!

what about your wifes choice? she made vows with you vows to be faithful. the only choice u made was to marry your wife then you choose to ignore your vows so your not very good at makeing choices are you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most married men on here without their partners consent wouldn’t dream of letting anyone else near their wives, and that’s FACT, flame if you wish, they are selfish and only care about themselves, funnily enough they all describe themselves as honest and respectful, just never understood why some people can be honest to every tom, dick and harry but fail to be honest to the people that supposedly mean the most to them, notice we said some, that's because the rest lie full stop.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Most married men on here without their partners consent wouldn’t dream of letting anyone else near their wives, and that’s FACT, flame if you wish, they are selfish and only care about themselves, funnily enough they all describe themselves as honest and respectful, just never understood why some people can be honest to every tom, dick and harry but fail to be honest to the people that supposedly mean the most to them, notice we said some, that's because the rest lie full stop. "

I suppose it is their conscience if they have one that they have to live with.

We don't meet with married men for a few reasons, we wouldn't meet with married women either if that was what we were looking for.

We don't like the fact they might only get out for an hour when they are meant to be walking the dog, we don't like the fact they may be clock watching , We don't really care what married people do with their lives, but we didn't want to be the people who caused a lot of hurt if a wife found out.

So we do try and stick with single men. I say try because we did get our fingers burnt once by a man who said he was single, acted single, stayed over for fun, could get away at short notice etc etc, but it turned out he had a partner who he lived with and who messaged us one day to let us know.

Now I know I just said it is their conscience they have to live with if they get caught, but our conscience took a battering that day even though we had done all the checks we thought of to accept he was telling the truth and he was single.

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"proves my point!!! its my life and i made that choice!!

Kitty we have had our run ins in the past, but would never dream of attacking u for the way u live your life"

Actually, Kitty has a very valid point.

How can any cheater state that they are honest and respectful when they are downright dishonest and disrespecting the person they took vows to love, honour and cherish?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'forsake all others' are vows that married swingers probably made!

Regardless of them agreeing to swing as a joint decision, that part of the vow is still broken!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

durrrr they not forsaken all others they fucking all others together LOL

i see your point, but no one is getting hurt when they agree to do it together. to cheat behind your loved ones back is breaking the vow they made to THEM. very diffrent then breaking the vow they made to 'god'

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"'forsake all others' are vows that married swingers probably made!

Regardless of them agreeing to swing as a joint decision, that part of the vow is still broken!"

I never said the words, 'forsaking all others.' We wrote our own vows.

Regardless of that fact.....

Yes.....we choose to break that vow but we swing as a couple, are honest and trustworthy in our relationships. You can't justify cheating by stooping so low as to make us out to be the ones who are going against our vows. Piousness and hypocrisy from cheaters is almost as unattractive a trait as dishonesty!

Technically, married couples who swing are breaking their vows, however, cheaters are breaking a moral, ethical and social vow by doing it behind their partners back.

Far better that swinging is between consenting adults, who believe in trust and honesty, than between those who's moral and ethical codes stick two fingers up to their partners, their friends and the world.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i feel like sitting back and singing and song, _adchick has said that needs to be said and to be honest there is nothing you can come back to that.... except bullshiiiiiiiiiiiiit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is nothing I can come back with, but.....

I want sex, but don't wanna leave my hubby and he doesn't want me to leave. Simple as that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am married and no my other half doesn't know ! I have been honest on my profile and said this, have not pretended to be single.....

Why is it that most of the ladies and lots of couples won't entertain the idea of playing with a married man , however they are more than happy to play with a married female in the same situation ??

what happened to sexualequality !!!lol

Like the others said, I also can't see where it says you are married in your profile.

If the said person was married or just courting we wouldn't meet him/her, nothing to do with the vows the said person took with there partner but simply because we think its cheating there partner and wrong.

How we see it, is we would find it heartbreaking if I found shaz was cheating - or Shaz found I was cheating, so we wouldn't want to be part of bringing that pain onto someone else.

And, for us anyway (note i said for us) if we had a problem where we felt the need to cheat on each other, we would talk about it together, if we couldn't solve it then we would seek help from a professional, and if they couldn't help it then we would find it alot fairer to call it a day rather than cheat.

Thats just us though

Tony

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There is nothing I can come back with, but.....

I want sex, but don't wanna leave my hubby and he doesn't want me to leave. Simple as that!"

to me that's a very fair point as my reasons are similar but I am afraid that you will always get a bit of stick on here because you do not fit into the same slot as the majority of members on here.

I know I have had a few comments and such but I don't really let it get to me .

The one thing in your favour is that you are female and so will not really go without as there are lots of horny guy's on here that will readily jump at the chance to get to know you so don't take peoples negative comments to much to heart

I will prolly get a little more flak from this posting as I have before but hay that's life hehehehehehehe!!!!!

best of luck in your search.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There is nothing I can come back with, but.....

I want sex, but don't wanna leave my hubby and he doesn't want me to leave. Simple as that!

to me that's a very fair point as my reasons are similar "

fair point???? to who? the hubby she is cheating on?? i am sure her hubby wont say thats a fair point LMAO

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My hubby would rather I do what I do quietly without it affecting our family life than leaving him to pursue it.

Should I live the rest of my life with no sex because my hubby is unable? Yes I did make vows to him. But to leave him and devastate our family would be harder on him than doing what I do quietly and carefully in the background without it impinging on us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There is nothing I can come back with, but.....

I want sex, but don't wanna leave my hubby and he doesn't want me to leave. Simple as that!

to me that's a very fair point as my reasons are similar

fair point???? to who? the hubby she is cheating on?? i am sure her hubby wont say thats a fair point LMAO"

Maybe he would maybe he would not but to slate someone who is making her/his own decisions in life without really knowing them in my eyes is wrong also.

He would have to be really green not to realise that his wife/partner has feelings and needs too and if he cannot will not provide for those needs for whatever reason then even if she loves him it will happen in the end.

The only thing I would say is better to keep it quiet and all behind closed doors than to be seen out by friends or people who know you both.

And yes I have been on the receiving end of a partner that has enjoyed extra activities without my knowledge LoL but at least they had the good manners to keep it quiet and not go out on the town showing off.

On Another note I have yet to meet a woman who in the past has been cheated on that will accept that at least part of what happened was her said because she in some way was neglecting her man or trying to make all of the rules, and reading some of the responses in these forums it seems to be a case of woman power and men will do what they are told LoL.

Now that I have lit the touch paper I will stand back and watch the fireworks hehehehehehehe!!!!!!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yea big man, you have the balls to front it out behind a computer screen and put your views accross but you aint got the balls tell your wife you have no respect for her and are fucking behind her back.

now thats what i call a real man!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yea big man, you have the balls to front it out behind a computer screen and put your views accross but you aint got the balls tell your wife you have no respect for her and are fucking behind her back.

now thats what i call a real man!"

;)

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

I have an answer typed out for that....

Do you know what? That kind of drivel doesn't even deserve an answer.

If you have to justify YOUR cheating by blaming YOUR wife....... then you are with the wrong wife.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"proves my point!!! its my life and i made that choice!!

Kitty we have had our run ins in the past, but would never dream of attacking u for the way u live your life

its not an attack its a quiestion"

call me stupid but wheres the question in that????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"proves my point!!! its my life and i made that choice!!

and u have never made a wrong choice in your life??? yes i made the decision to cheat!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

now thats what i call a real man!"

The number of guys I have had message me and "been honest" up front and told me they are married.

I've said Thanks but no thanks - not interested in married guys. But can we still chat??? FFS!!! Ask your wife.....

Go Kitty!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

hang hang on lets not tar everyone with the same brush, i have and never will blame my mrs for me being on here, it was my decision

but the whole point of the thread was people's opinions, which we have all answered, but there still people who wanna start the name calling, i thought we was all adults on this site !!! fuck me i didn't realise the the word swinging only belonged to certain people ,

we all on here for mostly same reasons a laugh, make some mates and sex, so if people on this 'swinging' site still wanna meet 'cheating, low life, scum of the earth' people like me!! wheres the problem???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and the actual OP point was, how come married men are frowned upon but married women don't get the same amount of flak?!

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Im going to stop this now before it degenerates further...I think everyone has had their say and im sure the subject will come up time and again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a married cheating woman I have to say I enjoy having sex outside of my marriage, for various reasons my hubby and I havent had a sexual relationship in our marriage (of 25 years)for more than 5 years . I choose to do what I do and I also choose not to tell him of

my exploits, why make him feel more inadequate than he does already . Many of you will be reading this thinking it's disgusting immoral and many other verbs you can all come up with. My views on couples swinging may vary differently to other peoples but I respect the fact they are adults and are able to make their own decisions. All you other married site members-don't be ashamed of what you and I do.. for every member who doesn't want you there are several more who do. Xxx

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