FabSwingers.com forum: Good/Bad Verifications

By *lkmazabuka OP Man
over a year ago

bristol

Admin should maybe allow 1 or 2 bad verifications to be displayed on people's profiles. All veris are good because we have option to display them or not. Personally I think they can be biased/misleading as well as helpful. I know it would affect many people's meets but maybe just 1 bad veri, just to show we're human

Just an idea by the way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Even some "positive" verifications may not be what someone wants on their profile. I would rather receive no verifications at all, rather than be forced to display them.

My verifications are personal, like photos, and I certainly don't display personal photos.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

You can show bad veris.

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By *lkmazabuka OP Man
over a year ago

bristol

"You can show bad veris.

Can you??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You can show bad veris.

Can you??

Same way as you show good ones

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"You can show bad veris.

Can you??

Same way as you show good ones "

This. I have 2 bad veris myself which would be normally on show. One says I'm a shit shag. Who cares? It's a measure of my reality not a measure of how good at sex I am.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That could be open to all sorts of abuse. People being turned down getting bitter and sending a bad made up veri.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You can show bad veris.

Can you??

Same way as you show good ones

This. I have 2 bad veris myself which would be normally on show. One says I'm a shit shag. Who cares? It's a measure of my reality not a measure of how good at sex I am. "

Really, someone veri'd that !??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never had a bad veri

do people really write them, seems a bit heartless to me, why would someone slag someone off they've had sex with? I just don't get it. Maybe I've just been lucky......or careful, I've only ever met nice women. Just proves to me, the way I'm playing the game is right for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would rather not write a veri at all then write a bad one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its up to yourself what veris you show - love all of ours but show a few only - occasionally swap them about to show a latest one maybe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would rather not write a veri at all then write a bad one. "

same - never had to write a bad one yet Sx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I won't get a bad one anyway. I'm great

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never had a bad veri

I agree, why would you go out of your way to be nasty? I think that says more about the person writing it than the person receiving it. If you have nothing nice to say then say nothing at all.

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

"Never had a bad veri

I don't think anyone on here will ever had a bad veri. After all, a bad veri will never get displayed so why would anyone ever write one?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Should be like eBay

It would show up the time wasters, the impolite and the abusive etc

If fab has evidence via a record of messages that the bad feedback is correct it should be displayed automatically; it would improve the site greatly for genuine folks and deter the nuisances.

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By *lkmazabuka OP Man
over a year ago

bristol

Might be good for sussing out time wasters or rude/abusive people..

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

Might be good for sussing out the bitter twisted folks.

Leaving a negative veri says more about the person leaving it than the person on the receiving end. After all, it takes 2 people to make a good meet, and there are already ways to report a no show.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Might be good for sussing out time wasters or rude/abusive people.."

Very much so, the site is far too lenient on such fools.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Might be good for sussing out the bitter twisted folks.

Leaving a negative veri says more about the person leaving it than the person on the receiving end. After all, it takes 2 people to make a good meet, and there are already ways to report a no show."

It may get reported bug folks never get to see it, it's like saying the person reporting a crime is worse than the perpetrator.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Admin should maybe allow 1 or 2 bad verifications to be displayed on people's profiles. All veris are good because we have option to display them or not. Personally I think they can be biased/misleading as well as helpful. I know it would affect many people's meets but maybe just 1 bad veri, just to show we're human

Just an idea by the way"

And a good one

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

"I won't get a bad one anyway. I'm great

Just sent you one; display that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sometimes you meet someone its not as if they were a bad person or nasty but you just didn't like them though for one reason or lots of reasons, other people they have met maybe more tolerant or easly pleased.

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

I won't verify at all if the meet was bad, I don't want to mislead anyone, and I will only display veris if I am happy to meet them again generally.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications."

Yes they should be displayed by default

The bad verifications would have to be backed up by evidence obtained from a message history etc

They could be informative without being abusive or insulting by simple means if moderation.

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By *lkmazabuka OP Man
over a year ago

bristol

"Should be like eBay

It would show up the time wasters, the impolite and the abusive etc

If fab has evidence via a record of messages that the bad feedback is correct it should be displayed automatically; it would improve the site greatly for genuine folks and deter the nuisances."

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By *ittle Pocket PerveWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

So for an example, If I've gone on a social but I don't fancy the meet and say no thankyou... That person then goes and writes me a bad veri, I have to show it? Even though it's down to personal choice, I've now got a negative veri against me!

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I've got two bad ones on show

i n fact my last very is a bad one

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

"I've got two bad ones on show

i n fact my last very is a bad one

No, it is not bad at all; that is just his 'preference'

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"why would someone slag someone off they've had sex with?"

I might not necessarily have had sex with them though. What happens if we have a social meet and they turn up sweaty and wearing dirty clothes? Or they behave inappropriately? Or they turn out to be completely bonkers?

I've had bad meets and so haven't verified the guy. Just because I don't get on with them, doesn't mean they're bad people. But sometimes you do meet some people who really shouldn't be on Fab.

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

"This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications.

Yes they should be displayed by default

The bad verifications would have to be backed up by evidence obtained from a message history etc

They could be informative without being abusive or insulting by simple means if moderation."

So if someone meets you, you all have a miserable time, and they send you a message detailing that they miserable time, and write you a verification detailing the same, that constitutes proof?

Can't see that being open to abuse at all.

It's a terrible idea, for obvious reasons. Amazing that people are even giving it the time of day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications.

Yes they should be displayed by default

The bad verifications would have to be backed up by evidence obtained from a message history etc

They could be informative without being abusive or insulting by simple means if moderation.

So if someone meets you, you all have a miserable time, and they send you a message detailing that they miserable time, and write you a verification detailing the same, that constitutes proof?

Can't see that being open to abuse at all.

It's a terrible idea, for obvious reasons. Amazing that people are even giving it the time of day."

Because some people have no common sense and they need other people to baby sit them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've got two bad ones on show

i n fact my last very is a bad one

Mine are all shit. I like to meet people with a sense of humour.

Some people take themselves way too seriously.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications.

Yes they should be displayed by default

The bad verifications would have to be backed up by evidence obtained from a message history etc

They could be informative without being abusive or insulting by simple means if moderation."

I don't get what the 'evidence' from message history would be though?!

I've got on really well with people on here via messaging, arrange to meet because I liked what I saw and then it's a big No because there's either no chemisty or they weren't how I thought they'd be in reality.

If that's the case I don't veri people, no need to leave a bad one.

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

"This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications.

Yes they should be displayed by default

The bad verifications would have to be backed up by evidence obtained from a message history etc

They could be informative without being abusive or insulting by simple means if moderation.

So if someone meets you, you all have a miserable time, and they send you a message detailing that they miserable time, and write you a verification detailing the same, that constitutes proof?

Can't see that being open to abuse at all.

It's a terrible idea, for obvious reasons. Amazing that people are even giving it the time of day."

I'm glad it's not just me that can see this is not a good idea and could not work in practice...proving the authenticity of the verification is the first major hurdle

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By *omethingSoGoodAboutSofiaWoman
over a year ago

Blackburn/Preston

"I would rather not write a veri at all then write a bad one. "

Same here! A shit shag for some is a great shag for others so unless the person being verified was rude etc and you're stating that, there's no point!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would rather not write a veri at all then write a bad one. "

Same! I just wouldn't leave one at all!!

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By *omethingSoGoodAboutSofiaWoman
over a year ago

Blackburn/Preston

"I won't get a bad one anyway. I'm great

Hahaha! Me too, this thread doesn't apply to us, why are we even commenting on it?!?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've got two bad ones on show

i n fact my last very is a bad one

Haha but they are funny, I have a few like that, I had them on show and was asked how I could let someone write that about me!! It was a joke! I had left an equally bad one on theirs, some people do take this site too seriously

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if we got a bad one we would display it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've got two bad ones on show

i n fact my last very is a bad one

Agree. Serious swingers... yawn. It's depressing how stupid some people are. Or maybe they have no sense of humour.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've got two bad ones on show

i n fact my last very is a bad one

nearly choked on my coffee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications.

Yes they should be displayed by default

The bad verifications would have to be backed up by evidence obtained from a message history etc

They could be informative without being abusive or insulting by simple means if moderation."

And who is going to sift through and verify all of this evidence?

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

people often want all sorts of features from the site without really thinking through the consequences.

So you want to display bad verifications backed up by messages ? who are you paying to go through peoples messages day in and out ? equally if you get someone pretty sarcastic or just having a laugh how do you tell ? I have seen pretty obvious jokes go way over the majority of posters heads on here the community is too diverse, someone's funny joke is someone else's most offensive comment of 2015. There is no actual way to police any of this.

Then of course what's to stop someone being a total arse off the website, how exactly are you going to police that ?

All a verification proves is there is someone real at the end of the profile that is it, if you are looking for more meaning than that or the site to do more with that then you're not thinking it through properly.

As for time wasters, we have met people in the past had great meets and then had them "waste our time" (aka something more important came up

) at a later date, the truth is we all have lives outside of this site and at any time something more important than casual sex with strangers can pop up, often when reading these forums there seems to be a lot of frustrated people not getting meets who want other things to blame than the silly male to female ratio and their own profile and approach this might be why they encounter so many "time wasters".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have another profile on a different site. Any feedback good or bad is atomically displayed but I have the opportunity to add a comment or dispute anything That is not true or abusive. It a great way of doing it as it really helps me identify time wasters or undesirables.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications.

Yes they should be displayed by default

The bad verifications would have to be backed up by evidence obtained from a message history etc

They could be informative without being abusive or insulting by simple means if moderation.

And who is going to sift through and verify all of this evidence? "

I'll do it I'm a nosy bitch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications.

Yes they should be displayed by default

The bad verifications would have to be backed up by evidence obtained from a message history etc

They could be informative without being abusive or insulting by simple means if moderation.

And who is going to sift through and verify all of this evidence?

I'll do it I'm a nosy bitch

I was about to say that,someone would have to read every verification and judge them to be good or bad and then decide which bad ones to have on permanent display. All you have to do to get around this is delete your account and open a new one.

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

I only ever display a couple. And don't verify unless asked to (and never ask for them in return). Who I've met is irrelevant; the fact I have met people is all I need to prove I am real. And yes, I have had a shit veri. I also have a sense of humour and thought it was funny, since it was. And I met the guy again. Anyone who took it seriously would be someone I wouldn't want to meet anyway and if the sender wasn't now UNLOS I would probably now only display that one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This would work fine if the recipient had no choice whether to have it displayed, but then the floodgates would be opened to all manner of abusive comments and false verifications.

Yes they should be displayed by default

The bad verifications would have to be backed up by evidence obtained from a message history etc

They could be informative without being abusive or insulting by simple means if moderation.

And who is going to sift through and verify all of this evidence?

I'll do it I'm a nosy bitch

Good girl x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a daft idea when the 'quality' of a meet is entirely subjective. One person's bad is anothers good. I had one meet with a now ex fab member and she made it her business to slate me on the forums, private messaging folk about me trying to cause me trouble etc do damn straight she'd have made it her business to leave me a horrible veri. Yet it was the only meet I had where we ended up not getting on and I guarantee that folk would take note of the one bad one over the dozen or more good ones.

No, piss poor idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*so damn straight*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What a daft idea when the 'quality' of a meet is entirely subjective. One person's bad is anothers good. I had one meet with a now ex fab member and she made it her business to slate me on the forums, private messaging folk about me trying to cause me trouble etc do damn straight she'd have made it her business to leave me a horrible veri. Yet it was the only meet I had where we ended up not getting on and I guarantee that folk would take note of the one bad one over the dozen or more good ones.

No, piss poor idea. "

Not really anything to do with how the sex etc goes

More to do with if folks actually are what they say that are and if they turn up as promised etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely a veri is to say the person is who they say they are and genuine, not a character reference or sexual performance review??! Some seem so graphic they put me off but maybe that's just me. I prefer to make my own mind up about a person, not go by what a complete stranger has said. Also, as I mentioned earlier, what's to stop someone bitter who you politely turned down sending a made up veri slating you? If its automatically displayed its there for all to see until admin remove it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely a veri is to say the person is who they say they are and genuine, not a character reference or sexual performance review??! Some seem so graphic they put me off but maybe that's just me. I prefer to make my own mind up about a person, not go by what a complete stranger has said. Also, as I mentioned earlier, what's to stop someone bitter who you politely turned down sending a made up veri slating you? If its automatically displayed its there for all to see until admin remove it. "

Agree with the first bit.

The second observation/question is answered in previous posts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with the first bit.

The second observation/question is answered in previous posts."

My apologies, I've been dipping in and out of the thread so haven't read all posts.

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By *nknownCallerMan
over a year ago

Bath

Similar to some of the other threads - When I joined the site & read the destruction's etc etc; I thought 'Verifications' were to just verify someone was a genuine person, to save wasting time on some clown who had no intentions of ever meeting

I think the problem with giving someone 'Bad Press' is that it may be down to just that odd occasion & not just in general.

If someone isn't genuine, then maybe they should be named & shamed to save people wasting time

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By *eryBigGirlWoman
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

I think the problem with automatically showing bad veri's is that it leaves people very open to abuse. I have had a bad veri from a guy I met once and didn't want to meet again which he reacted badly to. He went on to leave me the most vile and hateful verification I've ever read. NowI've a very thick skin and am fully aware I'm not everyone's cup of tea but have enough friends I see regularly to know I'm not all bad. Had that veri been automatically shown I would have been horrified and very likely left the site so no I disagree with the OP's statement

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a difference between displaying a shit veri that's said in jest (you know you both had a good time) and one that's said without.

If I was a crap meet for whatever reason ~ I'd rather the person tell me to my face then leave a veri telling everyone!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Similar to some of the other threads - When I joined the site & read the destruction's etc etc; I thought 'Verifications' were to just verify someone was a genuine person, to save wasting time on some clown who had no intentions of ever meeting

I think the problem with giving someone 'Bad Press' is that it may be down to just that odd occasion & not just in general.

If someone isn't genuine, then maybe they should be named & shamed to save people wasting time"

Nail hit soundly in the head and the whole point if the issue, well put.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the problem with automatically showing bad veri's is that it leaves people very open to abuse. I have had a bad veri from a guy I met once and didn't want to meet again which he reacted badly to. He went on to leave me the most vile and hateful verification I've ever read. NowI've a very thick skin and am fully aware I'm not everyone's cup of tea but have enough friends I see regularly to know I'm not all bad. Had that veri been automatically shown I would have been horrified and very likely left the site so no I disagree with the OP's statement"

Completely agree, it just takes not getting on with one person and they could make you out to be awful on a veri you'd have to show. It's properly stupid.

What if you didn't get on and they decided to put you didn't turn up/timewaster etc?

How would admin police what was the truth and what went up and what didn't?...

The idea is leakier than a collander.

No, there are folk on here who can be bitter...they'd find a way to use the idea to cause negativity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a fantastic fuck. Cant bad veri that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Imagine the sccenario that you met someone, didn't get on and called off the meet, they become bitter about it and leave a veri saying you never turned up and were a timewaster....

How would admin decide the truth with nothing but two people's words to go on?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"I've got two bad ones on show

i n fact my last very is a bad one

Hey! There's a coincidence! We have something in common! We could form a bad veri gang. Toshn can't join cos it's exclusive to those avec un mal de veri.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive had a bad one by accident of grammar.. could instead of could'nt

bless him, he tried. I would like to be able to drlete rather than just hide and retract or at least edit one Ive left

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"There's a difference between displaying a shit veri that's said in jest (you know you both had a good time) and one that's said without.

If I was a crap meet for whatever reason ~ I'd rather the person tell me to my face then leave a veri telling everyone!"

A very classy answer. Me and Diamondsmiles left each other amusingly bad verifications. Why? Cos we could, cos it was funny, cos we both have enough (38 for me) to prove we

are real and to create a little joie de vivre in da forums.

I'm actually pretty ok-ish. I mean excellent. Adequate in a superb sense, I'd say. Better than a wank. Definately.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did I mention I'm a fantastic fuck?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's a difference between displaying a shit veri that's said in jest (you know you both had a good time) and one that's said without.

If I was a crap meet for whatever reason ~ I'd rather the person tell me to my face then leave a veri telling everyone!

A very classy answer. Me and Diamondsmiles left each other amusingly bad verifications. Why? Cos we could, cos it was funny, cos we both have enough (38 for me) to prove we

are real and to create a little joie de vivre in da forums.

I'm actually pretty ok-ish. I mean excellent. Adequate in a superb sense, I'd say. Better than a wank. Definately.

Better than a wank and close.....all you need to be

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why would people send a bad veri? i think people would only veri if they liked what had happened and want everyone to know that.

have to say i would think it bad if someone was to send one like that, as if a meet was going bad you can stop and leave or not even start.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I've had one negative response about my bad veris, they said I should remove it(only had the one at the time)

So I told him to get a sense of humour and blocked him

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

"You can show bad veris.

Yup, we got one, but its a kinda " you had to be there" situation.

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By *lkmazabuka OP Man
over a year ago

bristol

I appreciate it's not for everyone, each to their own. Like most people I wouldn't leave a veri if the sex wasn't great or we didn't get on, but if they made me drive miles then pull out last minute then I would, for time wasting of course. What if you met a complete psycho, would you not wanna warn others?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even some "positive" verifications may not be what someone wants on their profile. I would rather receive no verifications at all, rather than be forced to display them.

My verifications are personal, like photos, and I certainly don't display personal photos. "

Totally agree. I've had this discussion a few times now, it's quite a contentious issue. Who would post a bad veri?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I appreciate it's not for everyone, each to their own. Like most people I wouldn't leave a veri if the sex wasn't great or we didn't get on, but if they made me drive miles then pull out last minute then I would, for time wasting of course. What if you met a complete psycho, would you not wanna warn others?

If everyone was completely honest yes, but how would admin police who was being honest about no shows and nutters and who was leaving bad veris for spite? They would only have one person's word against another's...totally un policeable, that's the problem....it would be prone to misuse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't you know everyone can last for hours in bed lol

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By *lkmazabuka OP Man
over a year ago

bristol

True..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In all honesty, would you meet someone if you had any reservations? Even when I've broken my rules and had a one off, or gone outside my age range, it's because I really liked her, I can honestly say, I've enjoyed every meet I've had. I don't think I'll ever be in a position to criticise and, God forbid I ever am, I wouldn't write anything, it all seems a little bit heartless to me.

I'm intrigued, do people really have shit meets? I just don't get it. I'm either very lucky, very particular or very careful.....or maybe I'm just that good

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By *nknownCallerMan
over a year ago

Bath

Thinking about it now, if I ever receive a bad veri' - cock to small/didn't get down & mow the lawn long enough etc etc I'd display it & only that one, then word my profile around it, just to highlight that 1 meet. Kinda reverse the psychology on the person who left it, for all to see & to make their own judgement on. Sounds a bit hectic & possibly OCD I know 'But' I'm sure it would get the point across

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