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As a wife or girl friend. If your man said a enough of swinging Will you Carry on regardless.

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By *ieutenant OP   Man
over a year ago

london

A group of friends were charting about this topic in a house party. Infact opinion were divided on this issue.what is your opinion?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would depend on what you agreed. If he is happy to let you carry on then fine, but if he wanted to stop completely then it stops surely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If either of us felt that way we would stop no problem. I would delete our account in a heartbeat if hubby asked me to. Swinging is an extension to our sex life not an essential part. Our relationship comes first, always has always will.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

If my OH asked me to stop, even though a part of me would miss it id stop! The relationship we have is much more important to me than.any cheap thrill ever could be

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If my OH asked me to stop, even though a part of me would miss it id stop! The relationship we have is much more important to me than.any cheap thrill ever could be "

Ditto

S x

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds


"If my OH asked me to stop, even though a part of me would miss it id stop! The relationship we have is much more important to me than.any cheap thrill ever could be

Ditto

S x"

Exactly this.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

a relationship is worth more than swinging..... full stop...

if i got into swinging as a couple, and we were doing this together, and either of us (me or them) wanted to stop.... I'd stop.... no ifs... no buts

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Some will carry on some won't. It's a matter of the dynamic of the relationship and the reasons the man wants to stop really.

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By *ixie69Woman
over a year ago

leicester


"If my OH asked me to stop, even though a part of me would miss it id stop! The relationship we have is much more important to me than.any cheap thrill ever could be

Ditto

S x

Exactly this. "

Agree with bells on. Well said.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"If my OH asked me to stop, even though a part of me would miss it id stop! The relationship we have is much more important to me than.any cheap thrill ever could be "

Lol your meets are cheap thrills?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Since I'm poly this would be a dealbreaker.

If any of my parnters wanted me to stop sleeping with other people, they know that they may as well just walk away now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If either of us felt that way we would stop no problem. I would delete our account in a heartbeat if hubby asked me to. Swinging is an extension to our sex life not an essential part. Our relationship comes first, always has always will. "

Yup - exactly how it should be

S x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If either of us felt that way we would stop no problem. I would delete our account in a heartbeat if hubby asked me to. Swinging is an extension to our sex life not an essential part. Our relationship comes first, always has always will. "

This, definitely this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our only rule....if one isn't happy with anything we don't do it. It's a simple but effective rule.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I don't think it's a case of one partner asking the other to stop and that partner immediately acquiesing, discussion should take place or it's just one person making the decision. Communication is the main thing surely.

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By *ench and StripeCouple
over a year ago

Stenalees


"Since I'm poly this would be a dealbreaker.

If any of my parnters wanted me to stop sleeping with other people, they know that they may as well just walk away now."

Wasp you are 1 of the most interesting people I've seen on here. Hope 1 day we can meet and I can talk to you about your world. Would love to know how you really tick.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since I'm poly this would be a dealbreaker.

If any of my parnters wanted me to stop sleeping with other people, they know that they may as well just walk away now.

Wasp you are 1 of the most interesting people I've seen on here. Hope 1 day we can meet and I can talk to you about your world. Would love to know how you really tick."

Thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Monogomy is just sooooooooo boring.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Monogomy is just sooooooooo boring. "

Is it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Monogomy is just sooooooooo boring.

Is it? "

I don't find it boring, but I certainly don't find that it works for me.

Each to their own.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Monogomy is just sooooooooo boring.

Is it? "
Wow that is a strong statement ! Have to disagree with that one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Monogomy is just sooooooooo boring.

Is it? Wow that is a strong statement ! Have to disagree with that one."

Same.

Anything can be boring - even swinging..

It's like saying sex is boring - it takes more than one person to make it good...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely by definition if we weren't bored with what our partners did for us we wouldn't be seeking it elsewhere. variety is the spice of life. It keeps us fresh and attentive. Being on a swinging website, however you dress it up means you are not happy in monogamy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Monogomy is just sooooooooo boring.

Is it? Wow that is a strong statement ! Have to disagree with that one.

Same.

Anything can be boring - even swinging..

It's like saying sex is boring - it takes more than one person to make it good..."

You are setting a trap to ensnare by the way. You are trying to go down the route of you must be a boring lover Bla Bla Bla. Perhaps I am. I like a bit of help now and again. That is not what OP was trying to get at.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Speak for yourself !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Misery loves company

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If either one of us wanted to stop. It stops. No need for explainations.

Same as if we met a couple and one of us didnt find one of them attractive. It stops. No taking one for the team.

Swinging is about a partnership, if you are a couple, its not a solo sport. (unless of course thats whats good for you)

x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not bored one bit. Just a bit liberated and enjoy watching/being watched and very occasionally having sexual experiences with other couples. Its not something we need nor something to compensate for a lack of anything between us. Its just a bit of mutual fun between consenting adults and I can honestly hand on heart say that it wouldn't bother me in the slightest if we stopped swinging. Maybe this is why it works well for us as its not something we feel we need rather something we like to do for fun sometimes. Each to their own but please don't make assumptions about our relationship based on yours.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"If my OH asked me to stop, even though a part of me would miss it id stop! The relationship we have is much more important to me than.any cheap thrill ever could be

Lol your meets are cheap thrills?"

One of my regular meets refers to himself as my cheap thrill often we have a good laugh about it.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Surely by definition if we weren't bored with what our partners did for us we wouldn't be seeking it elsewhere. variety is the spice of life. It keeps us fresh and attentive. Being on a swinging website, however you dress it up means you are not happy in monogamy.

"

That's quite a cynical view in my opinion. It wasn't boredom that brought us here. If we go on holiday it isn't because we are bored or unhappy with home but because we want to experience new things and places together and just as you can't feel the Spanish sun on your back on Eastbourne beach you can't experience a threesome with only two of you.

Boredom might be your motivation but you shouldn't assume it's everyone's.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"If either one of us wanted to stop. It stops. No need for explainations.

Same as if we met a couple and one of us didnt find one of them attractive. It stops. No taking one for the team.

Swinging is about a partnership, if you are a couple, its not a solo sport. (unless of course thats whats good for you)

x"

I agree with what you say except the no need for explanations. I would want to know why out of concern, I would happily accept "I just don't want to do it any more" but having talked long and hard about swinging in the first place I think stopping deserves discussion too.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots


"Surely by definition if we weren't bored with what our partners did for us we wouldn't be seeking it elsewhere. variety is the spice of life. It keeps us fresh and attentive. Being on a swinging website, however you dress it up means you are not happy in monogamy.

That's quite a cynical view in my opinion. It wasn't boredom that brought us here. If we go on holiday it isn't because we are bored or unhappy with home but because we want to experience new things and places together and just as you can't feel the Spanish sun on your back on Eastbourne beach you can't experience a threesome with only two of you.

Boredom might be your motivation but you shouldn't assume it's everyone's."

Quite agree! This is a journey that we are on together...why on earth would I want to be on it without Paul??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I had a girlfriend and she stopped because I asked her to, due to my loving devotion to her. I would feel on top of the world because she would love me. Jealousy has nothing to do with wanting to stop.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"If my OH asked me to stop, even though a part of me would miss it id stop! The relationship we have is much more important to me than.any cheap thrill ever could be "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I had a girlfriend and she stopped because I asked her to, due to my loving devotion to her. I would feel on top of the world because she would love me. Jealousy has nothing to do with wanting to stop. "

In my world, loving someone is about being happy that they are doing what makes them happy. Not being happy because they obey you and call obeying you 'love'.

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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago

Wakefield

If either told the other enough of swinging it would make no difference the other would carry on.

We are equals not possessions of the other.

If however one of us said to the other he/she no longer enjoyed swinging and wanted to stop we would both agree to stop.

It all to do with respect.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Monogomy is just sooooooooo boring. "

I got bored of swinging a lot quicker than I got bored of monogamy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Surely by definition if we weren't bored with what our partners did for us we wouldn't be seeking it elsewhere. variety is the spice of life. It keeps us fresh and attentive. Being on a swinging website, however you dress it up means you are not happy in monogamy.

That's quite a cynical view in my opinion. It wasn't boredom that brought us here. If we go on holiday it isn't because we are bored or unhappy with home but because we want to experience new things and places together and just as you can't feel the Spanish sun on your back on Eastbourne beach you can't experience a threesome with only two of you.

Boredom might be your motivation but you shouldn't assume it's everyone's."
Not a lot of Eastbourne sun on our backs recently either lol

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

mywe don't swing much at the moment anyway but letsbe has repeatedly said that if I was to say stop then we stop, I feel exactly the same. My relationship is so much more than just swinging.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham


"If I had a girlfriend and she stopped because I asked her to, due to my loving devotion to her. I would feel on top of the world because she would love me. Jealousy has nothing to do with wanting to stop. "

What if she stopped just because she was bored of it and nothing to do with your loving devotion?

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By *ixmaMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Surely by definition if we weren't bored with what our partners did for us we wouldn't be seeking it elsewhere. variety is the spice of life. It keeps us fresh and attentive. Being on a swinging website, however you dress it up means you are not happy in monogamy.

"

Does that mean if hubby wanted to stop you wouldn't or pretend to go along to appease him but maybe play behind his back to satisfy your urges?

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By *ussexsocialMan
over a year ago

Billingshurst

if either of us asked the other to stop , firstly i guess we would ask why , then secondly stop swinging , we swing for fun , not for need , and if one of us isn't having fun then it would be time to call it a day .....

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By *ussexsocialMan
over a year ago

Billingshurst


"Surely by definition if we weren't bored with what our partners did for us we wouldn't be seeking it elsewhere. variety is the spice of life. It keeps us fresh and attentive. Being on a swinging website, however you dress it up means you are not happy in monogamy.

That's quite a cynical view in my opinion. It wasn't boredom that brought us here. If we go on holiday it isn't because we are bored or unhappy with home but because we want to experience new things and places together and just as you can't feel the Spanish sun on your back on Eastbourne beach you can't experience a threesome with only two of you.

Boredom might be your motivation but you shouldn't assume it's everyone's.Not a lot of Eastbourne sun on our backs recently either lol"
sun ? sun ? whats that ????

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Surely by definition if we weren't bored with what our partners did for us we wouldn't be seeking it elsewhere. variety is the spice of life. It keeps us fresh and attentive. Being on a swinging website, however you dress it up means you are not happy in monogamy.

That's quite a cynical view in my opinion. It wasn't boredom that brought us here. If we go on holiday it isn't because we are bored or unhappy with home but because we want to experience new things and places together and just as you can't feel the Spanish sun on your back on Eastbourne beach you can't experience a threesome with only two of you.

Boredom might be your motivation but you shouldn't assume it's everyone's.Not a lot of Eastbourne sun on our backs recently either lol"

Ain't that the truth!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If either of us felt that way we would stop no problem. I would delete our account in a heartbeat if hubby asked me to. Swinging is an extension to our sex life not an essential part. Our relationship comes first, always has always will. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I had a girlfriend and she stopped because I asked her to, due to my loving devotion to her. I would feel on top of the world because she would love me. Jealousy has nothing to do with wanting to stop.

In my world, loving someone is about being happy that they are doing what makes them happy. Not being happy because they obey you and call obeying you 'love'."

He said asked not ordered. And isnt your world all in your head?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If any of my partners wanted me to stop sleeping with other people, they know that they may as well just walk away now."
When I first was a Swinger I was similar. I couldn't see myself without the Swinging scene and the friends I had made.

Now, I'm in a different place and would swap visiting Swinging clubs for a loving relationship in a split second, given the opportunity!

I don't know how I will see it in the future, I could change again?

Monogamy is of no value to me but I wouldn't mind coupling up with a non-Swinger either.

I would hope I would always have plenty of sex, but life gives you no such guarantees!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I had a girlfriend and she stopped because I asked her to, due to my loving devotion to her. I would feel on top of the world because she would love me. Jealousy has nothing to do with wanting to stop.

In my world, loving someone is about being happy that they are doing what makes them happy. Not being happy because they obey you and call obeying you 'love'.

He said asked not ordered. And isnt your world all in your head?"

I suppose what I was getting at was that you could be totally in 'love' with someone and also not want to give up having sex with other people.

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By *biza007Man
over a year ago

Manchester

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When do you think it is the best time to ask for exclusivity then ?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

[Removed by poster at 10/02/15 22:07:06]

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria


"When do you think it is the best time to ask for exclusivity then ? "

2nd message, sent from your phone whilst you're hiding in the bushes outside his house

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