FabSwingers.com forum: Cheating

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Is it still cheating on your other half even if they know and say yes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Nobody got any thoughts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they know and say yes and actually mean yes for the right reasons, not because of fear? Then no not cheating.

If they say yes but don't actually mean yes and you play away and get al the fun? Not cheating, but makes you a prick.

If you just play away and don't even bother to tell them? Cheating scum.

IMO of course. C x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No its not, more fun when they sneak out behind hubbys back when he is at work and doesn't know

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

"Nobody got any thoughts"

Flipping heck, you are impatient...

If they genuinely know, are happy and its agreed - and you can prove it to anyone you meet, then not cheating - to my mind thats an open relationship.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married

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By *upcake68Woman
over a year ago

Ely

"Is it still cheating on your other half even if they know and say yes "

Sorry but if your other half is fully aware of you playing elsewhere & has consented to you doing so, how is it cheating or am i missing something!?!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thats nawty shag lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married"

You seem concerned.

Are you cheating?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thats nawty shag lol"
Yes it is red lol, but fun

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By *upcake68Woman
over a year ago

Ely

"So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married

You seem concerned.

Are you cheating?"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No just putting a debate out there??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It could be viewed as honest and open cheating I suppose if you want to put that slant on it...

If everything is open and honest then therein lies the taboo or kink of it all for many, the knowing and involving ones self with the process of a partener 'playing away' is a heck of a turn on...perhaps.

But if its all consensual I say no, cheating is an ugly inappropriate word for something so great....

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

If you are married and having sex with other people with your spouses approval then its not cheating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/01/15 16:22:53]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married"

Are you asking does it compromise your marriage vows having sex with others?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you're religious then it's cheating because you aren't allowed to have sex with anyone you're not married to. Not sure who you are cheating on, but yeah it is for them people.

Most people don't wanna have fbs who are attached though coz it means they aren't the priority.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you are married and having sex with other people with your spouses approval then its not cheating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married"

It probably is in the eyes of of the devoutly religious or the church...though I'm not particularly religious so that's just a generalised guess..

Point being, there will be several views on it....I motion that yours counts most to you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No just putting a debate out there??"

That's cool.

There seems an awful lot of mature guys on here recently who cannot accommodate due to living with family/house share/kids etc.

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds

Cheating is dishonesty and betrayal of trust. In our view if you are neither behaving dishonestly nor betraying trust then you aren't cheating. But "cheating" is just a word, it's the motivation, circumstances, and the effect on your partner that are most important.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

According to many of the wise posts I have seen over the years:

If you are a man without a couples profile, who's wife will not agree to talk to your prospective playmates, you are cheating.

If you are a man who has a single profile who says his wife doesnt want to know anything about your activities, you are cheating.

If you cannot accommodate, you are cheating.

If you are a woman, your husband drove you to it.

In the eyes of the law and in the eyes of most churches, sex outside of marriage is adultery.

Just because a couple choose to swing, it just changes it to infidelity with consent.

This is nothing more than my opinion in the interest of debate and in no way do I judge the opinion of others or their right to hold any or none of the above views.

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By *ngel n tedCouple
over a year ago

maidstone

I would imagine it still is cheating technically, "to forsake all others", but if it's yes between both parties....crack on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

cheating IS JUST AWFULL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married"

If it's done with consent, you're not cheating. You have an open marriage like my wife and I do.

However, if you got married in a church, you may have unleashed the wrath of whatever god you choose to believe in.

As far as the law goes, adultery isn't illegal, but it is grounds for divorce. However, this cannot be relied upon if you or your wife allowed or encouraged the infidelity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married

If it's done with consent, you're not cheating. You have an open marriage like my wife and I do.

However, if you got married in a church, you may have unleashed the wrath of whatever god you choose to believe in.

As far as the law goes, adultery isn't illegal, but it is grounds for divorce. However, this cannot be relied upon if you or your wife allowed or encouraged the infidelity."

Very sensibly put.

Your wife knows and consents, so how can you be cheating on her??

Also, as has been said, unlike many of the so-called 'single' guys on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"cheating IS JUST AWFULL "

just noticed your avatar is almost a mirror image of the op's avatar....hmm...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it still cheating on your other half even if they know and say yes "

That's all part of swinging in our view - no harm done and all above board

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married"

Only you and your partner can define the terms of your relationship, not others...work it out with them would be my suggestion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married

Only you and your partner can define the terms of your relationship, not others...work it out with them would be my suggestion"

Very true, providing of course, the partner is given a choice rather than being lied to or cheated upon.

Back to the beginning really, cheating only comes round by dishonesty.

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

If someone's partner knows and is happy for them to meet, its not cheating

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Have not got a partner i cant accomodate because i have daughter and grandson living with me god there r some deep thoughts about this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, married and bareback, is the hot topics here.

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

"Is it still cheating on your other half even if they know and say yes "

The important thing is, do you think it is cheating?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have not got a partner i cant accomodate because i have daughter and grandson living with me god there r some deep thoughts about this "

As a fella you have to explain yourself in front of a jury of your peers, and otherwise stand up to scrutiny as its taken for granted your cheating if you can't accommodate or some other such thing....or not, i've never needed to explain before.....but then, I chat with nice folk who haven't got so jaded yet... so they are out there, just take your time and you'll meet some nice folk, loads abou

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So its not cheating even if u r married and taken vows when u married"

If you are married with vows it is cheating.

The wedding ceremony does not include a legal rider to the effect "Keeping only unto him (unless otherwise agreed between the parties, acting reasonably) as long as you both shall live".

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By *lex 1971Man
over a year ago

telford

god no:;)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am in a relationship ok we are not married. But we have been together 16 months and in that time andy has met single women from fab while I have been at work. We have an agreement as long as we tell each other before hand,who and where it is fine. If we tell each other after we see it as cheating and that would be the end of our relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it still cheating on your other half even if they know and say yes "

Lol it sounds lke you are cheating but want to convince people on fab you have consent from your wife/partner to meet people on fab.

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By *4nc3rCouple
over a year ago

Clacton-On-Sea, Essex

If your supposed wife agrees to you playing away, why not talk to her and ask her how she feels about it and where the line between having fun and cheating is.

But, hypothetically, if she has agreed to it just because she is afraid to lose her marriage if she doesn't - or some other silly reason that means she's just dealing with something she doesn't like instead of her being knowledgable and enjoying it, then it doesn't really matter if her verbal consent is given - you're still being a twat to make someone feel like that lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

of course its not cheating if its consensual thats the whole point .. . i'm not particularly a swinger - polyamory is the thing for me/us and its great. . . theres an element nof thrill in cheating . or at least doing something that you shouldn't and avoiding getting caught . . the other day when i went off and did something that i enjoy . purely selfish pleasure for me . . my gf said don;t do it and don';t get caught . .. but didnt mean it she'd already given me permission . if thats the word . as we both "allow" total freedom within our relationship --- it should be about honesty and negotiation .. Cheating is definately bad !!

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By *harlieandangel39Couple
over a year ago

Nr Gloucester

I might get shot down here:

My hubby loves the idea of my playing and being involved.

However the shoe is now on the other foot; and I'm not keen on the idea; always thought I would be. He's had a few socials with 1 person but a few things have happened and im not happy; but have given the acceptance because he wants to try. But driving me mad!

I'm just being selfish

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I might get shot down here:

My hubby loves the idea of my playing and being involved.

I'm just being selfish

No, it has to be fine with both parties....if your not happy, talk to him...

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By *harlieandangel39Couple
over a year ago

Nr Gloucester

"I might get shot down here:

My hubby loves the idea of my playing and being involved.

I'm just being selfish

No, it has to be fine with both parties....if your not happy, talk to him..."

Have done; but he wants to try! I've had fun for a while; so can I say no?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it still cheating on your other half even if they know and say yes "

No...

Cheating is lieing and being deceptive x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it still cheating on your other half even if they know and say yes

No...

Cheating is lieing and being deceptive x"

I'd agree with this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I might get shot down here:

My hubby loves the idea of my playing and being involved.

I'm just being selfish

No, it has to be fine with both parties....if your not happy, talk to him...

Have done; but he wants to try! I've had fun for a while; so can I say no?! "

You can always say no.

But then I think you would both need to sit down and discuss whether this lifestyle is for you.

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