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What would stop you

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By *habs OP   Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

...Making the first move? This probably more suited to the ladies but men aren't ruled out ofcourse.

I ask as I notice from time to time certain couples and women look at my profile repeatedly. Now anyone can look once or twice in a short space of time so I don't count those, but when a complete stranger looks repeatedly (3 -4 times a week) for what seems months then surely there's some curiousity on their part?

So what's stopping them sending a "Hello" message?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"...Making the first move? This probably more suited to the ladies but men aren't ruled out ofcourse.

I ask as I notice from time to time certain couples and women look at my profile repeatedly. Now anyone can look once or twice in a short space of time so I don't count those, but when a complete stranger looks repeatedly (3 -4 times a week) for what seems months then surely there's some curiousity on their part?

So what's stopping them sending a "Hello" message?"

Laziness?

Most of the time I find couples just wink, ladies message far more often.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well it cant be because of your friends list and verifications because you have hidden them. maybe they like your pics, or forgot they have looked at you before. I never send anyone a message.

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By *habs OP   Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

Its weird, a bit of reverse as usually the couples (that do message) tend to ask "how big is your cock" or "do you want to come watch us", while nothing at all from the single ladies (one person told me a single lady should not have to chase)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its weird, a bit of reverse as usually the couples (that do message) tend to ask "how big is your cock" or "do you want to come watch us", while nothing at all from the single ladies (one person told me a single lady should not have to chase)"

no a single lady should not have to chase.

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)


"Its weird, a bit of reverse as usually the couples (that do message) tend to ask "how big is your cock" or "do you want to come watch us", while nothing at all from the single ladies (one person told me a single lady should not have to chase)"

I'm not near you, but I don't see messaging as "chasing"

I do send first messages. This is my sex life, and like other areas of my life - I refuse to be passive and a spectator. If I see something I like, I will go after it - and message to see if there is any thing to work on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its weird, a bit of reverse as usually the couples (that do message) tend to ask "how big is your cock" or "do you want to come watch us", while nothing at all from the single ladies (one person told me a single lady should not have to chase)

no a single lady should not have to chase. "

That's a slightly arrogant way of thinking. It may well be true that due to the ratios of men and women here that a woman DOESN'T have to chase, but SHOULDN'T ....well that's a way of thinking that would never align to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No idea I look at a profile and if I don't like something about it I move on, I wouldnt keep looking, and don't understand why anyone else would, if you like mail if so!wthong is stopping you making that move move onto someone else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its weird, a bit of reverse as usually the couples (that do message) tend to ask "how big is your cock" or "do you want to come watch us", while nothing at all from the single ladies (one person told me a single lady should not have to chase)

no a single lady should not have to chase. "

Something worth having is always worth pursuing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They might fancy you but don't fit your requirements so don't see the point in messaging you. I know your profile says something about chatting to anyone but they might not see the point in that or just enjoy looking and are satisfied with that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have a few that do this, I have no idea why they don't say hi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes get loads of repeat lookers but never saying Hi?, I cant message them back or wink as they have their settings to block as out of specified age range? strange though.

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By *habs OP   Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex


"no a single lady should not have to chase.

Something worth having is always worth pursuing "

The problem i see is in thw "pursuing": normally the pursued is running away from the pursuer as doesnt want to be caught. If you were interested in 2 guys, one was forthright in his intentions while the other played hot and cold.. which would you be compelled to meet?

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By *habs OP   Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex


"They might fancy you but don't fit your requirements so don't see the point in messaging you. I know your profile says something about chatting to anyone but they might not see the point in that or just enjoy looking and are satisfied with that."

I don't know about that, the self elimination thing. I would find one wink more effective than being viewed a thousand times.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Possibly time constraints

I don't get in touch with lots of people I may like the look of because my playtime is limited and I feel like I'm wasting peoples time by starting up conversations that I know will lead to when are you free to meet

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I had noticed one or two who kept looking at me, so sent a polite message. They returned a message saying that they had wanted to get in touch, but couldn't because of my filters, so by looking at me and fabbing my pics would get my attention and it did

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I had noticed one or two who kept looking at me, so sent a polite message. They returned a message saying that they had wanted to get in touch, but couldn't because of my filters, so by looking at me and fabbing my pics would get my attention and it did "

yep i have to agree with that, theres a few in here I flirt and chat with but when you want to say hi privately you can't because of filters and yes I do know why people use filters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They might fancy you but don't fit your requirements so don't see the point in messaging you. I know your profile says something about chatting to anyone but they might not see the point in that or just enjoy looking and are satisfied with that.

I don't know about that, the self elimination thing. I would find one wink more effective than being viewed a thousand times."

Did you wink them? I don't look at winks so didn't think about them really. Might be all they need to push them into talking to you.

I think not self confident people might make any excuse not to contact you tbf.

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By *ench and StripeCouple
over a year ago

Stenalees

OK from our point. Certain profiles interest us but we are regularly chatting to more people than we currently have time to meet. We might want to chat to you but be waiting for a break.

We might be perving your pics but don't fit your criteria from your profile so just enjoying what you freely sharing.

Checking new pics if you update we tend to check.

The 1 that gets us is the couple we met at a party. Chatted and swapped friends then they stopped talking to us removed friends but still check us at least 2 times a week lol.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"Its weird, a bit of reverse as usually the couples (that do message) tend to ask "how big is your cock" or "do you want to come watch us", while nothing at all from the single ladies (one person told me a single lady should not have to chase)"

I never chase, the most I will ever do 'cold' is fab a pic if I really like it, though I might comment on something I found very amusing, and I will wink back if I like someone.

She may be assuming lack of interest on your part if you do not respond to her viewing.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"They might fancy you but don't fit your requirements so don't see the point in messaging you. I know your profile says something about chatting to anyone but they might not see the point in that or just enjoy looking and are satisfied with that.

I don't know about that, the self elimination thing. I would find one wink more effective than being viewed a thousand times.

Did you wink them? I don't look at winks so didn't think about them really. ."

Yes, I should qualify my point by saying someone has to have a damn good avatar to attract my attention in winks, no way I am viewing all the profiles, I just glance down them quickly before I delete. I think the only way for a fella to know is to send a message.

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By *eanut Butter CupWoman
over a year ago

B & M Bargains


"Possibly time constraints

I don't get in touch with lots of people I may like the look of because my playtime is limited and I feel like I'm wasting peoples time by starting up conversations that I know will lead to when are you free to meet "

Exactly this for me

I am already chatting to people who I want to meet but can't find the time to! I don't want to "make the first move" then feel under pressure to make time for someone new even if I do like the look of them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"no a single lady should not have to chase.

Something worth having is always worth pursuing

The problem i see is in thw "pursuing": normally the pursued is running away from the pursuer as doesnt want to be caught. "

This is true.

The pursued are trying to keep their distance. There'd be no distance if they wanted to be caught

S x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a few that have done this but one particular couple view my profile at least daily and often more for the past 18 months. I think of them as my "pet" stalkers. They (if it is indeed a "they") have no pics and have never met....therefore I won't message them. I have winked them...I think twice, but nothing back.

A few of my friends know of this and think it is a scream....a bit sad on their part tho? Nothing better to do with their time kinda thing....

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By *habs OP   Man
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex


"Its weird, a bit of reverse as usually the couples (that do message) tend to ask "how big is your cock" or "do you want to come watch us", while nothing at all from the single ladies (one person told me a single lady should not have to chase)

I never chase, the most I will ever do 'cold' is fab a pic if I really like it, though I might comment on something I found very amusing, and I will wink back if I like someone.

She may be assuming lack of interest on your part if you do not respond to her viewing."

Hang on,.. so she views my profile repeatedly,.. but if "I""! don't email her first them I'm the one not interested? How does that work? Why is the onus to send the firs email on the person that's been viewed, rather than the person repeat viewing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Possibly time constraints

I don't get in touch with lots of people I may like the look of because my playtime is limited and I feel like I'm wasting peoples time by starting up conversations that I know will lead to when are you free to meet "

This for me too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its weird, a bit of reverse as usually the couples (that do message) tend to ask "how big is your cock" or "do you want to come watch us", while nothing at all from the single ladies (one person told me a single lady should not have to chase)

I never chase, the most I will ever do 'cold' is fab a pic if I really like it, though I might comment on something I found very amusing, and I will wink back if I like someone.

She may be assuming lack of interest on your part if you do not respond to her viewing.

Hang on,.. so she views my profile repeatedly,.. but if "I""! don't email her first them I'm the one not interested? How does that work? Why is the onus to send the firs email on the person that's been viewed, rather than the person repeat viewing?"

Some people are mental. Just mail and sort a meet. Too many people play ridiculous games. Don't jump through hoops.

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

Maybe people forget that they've looked, and so relook every time they do a search.

Maybe they're checking for new pics in your profile

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