FabSwingers.com forum: (most) Single Guys.... why??!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why is it that most single guys dont have a clue of how to use this site and insisit on sending inappropriate or irrelevant messages to couples and Im guessing women too.

So much so that most profiles are littered with rules and "dont message this".. (ours included!)

Is it that hard to understand how this works?

This is a sex site but doesn't mean people are looking to see pictures of cocks thrusted in their face or 3 word mesaages asking things that are obvious

Grrrr, its so annoying!

As the male half of this writing let me give some advice.... very very few women or couples just want a guy for his cock. They want a bit of intrigue, flirting, teasing, laughter first. "Fuck peoples minds then people".

Its a marathon not a sprint. Look at the bigger picture.. and dont be pushy.. no one will respond well to that!

Weve started blocking lots of people now as its getting ridiculous. I think fab should introduce restrictions for single men ie. Max messages sent to 1 person (I know there's a warning but this isnt enough)

Interested to hear others thoughts?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have put it so well already. Totally agree xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cheer up its Saturday

Gimp

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't do this so think it would be unfair if I was to be restricted because of other users

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

It won't change, it will always be the way some people decide to message.

There are lots of threads about it, they won't change the behavior of the people you are directing your angst to.

Block all guys and you do the searching, it may be less frustrating when you start the conversation, rather than them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the replies..

We are on top of this now. Just seems a shame as so many guys could do much better on here

Perhaps I should start a business like in the film Hitch.. but "Sexual Hitch"

hahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a sex site. Photos of cocks and pussy and fucking. They see adverts on porn sites offering free sex. It's the same thing... in their eyes.

Like View says- block and search yourself. Much less stressful.

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

"Why is it that most single guys dont have a clue of how to use this site and insisit on sending inappropriate or irrelevant messages to couples and Im guessing women too.

Interested to hear others thoughts? "

I know it must be galling to get so many irritating messages, but then there may well be a fair number of single guys who just get on with doing the right thing of thoroughly reading profiles, appraising likes and dislikes, preferences, deciding whether or not to send a message, then constructing an appropriate one (just the one)and, in time, getting a favourable response that leads to more flirtation and banter, and an eventual meet..

This sort of successful interchange rarely gets reported on the forum.

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By *onnie and JohnCouple
over a year ago

andover

we set the filters to stop single males posting, then if we fancy a mmf we spend a little time finding one. chatroom a good place to look plenty wanking in there .Connie

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By *eKoopleCouple
over a year ago

Germany / Manchester

We don't have much of a problem with single guys. The occasional few don't read but fortunately we're not bombarded. Our issue is in one of our favourite clubs, we end up having to tell guys 3-4 times in the night to back off because the can't keep their uninvited hands to themselves. On the whole single guys are great, but the few spoil it for the genuine majority. We're really not suprised quite a few profiles have very strict rules.

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By *p4funCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

take it with a pinch of salt still get " one liners" some times "one word" messages and the totally random "friends requests " some have been amusing "have you been shopping?"

"is it raining there ?"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's a sex site. Photos of cocks and pussy and fucking. They see adverts on porn sites offering free sex. It's the same thing... in their eyes.

Like View says- block and search yourself. Much less stressful.

We do this but out of principle we shouldnt have to. We like the excitement of receiving a message rather than looking all the time.

Mayb it calls for more sofisticated software but should be better filters that could help

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We don't have much of a problem with single guys. The occasional few don't read but fortunately we're not bombarded. Our issue is in one of our favourite clubs, we end up having to tell guys 3-4 times in the night to back off because the can't keep their uninvited hands to themselves. On the whole single guys are great, but the few spoil it for the genuine majority. We're really not suprised quite a few profiles have very strict rules. "

We haven't been to a club but certainly heard of this happening. When we were at a lifestyle resort this happened to my friend "come and fuck my wife" over and over. Luckily hes a 6ft 4 marine so he can handle himself!!

You probably know that all decent clubs have strict rules so next time just speak to the staff and that will be the end of it x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is it that most single guys dont have a clue of how to use this site and insisit on sending inappropriate or irrelevant messages to couples and Im guessing women too.

Interested to hear others thoughts?

This sort of successful interchange rarely gets reported on the forum."

Well said Sir!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sites like these attract all the wrong`uns tbh

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By *dventuroususCouple
over a year ago

sunderland

"Why is it that most single guys dont have a clue of how to use this site and insisit on sending inappropriate or irrelevant messages to couples and Im guessing women too.

So much so that most profiles are littered with rules and "dont message this".. (ours included!)

Is it that hard to understand how this works?

This is a sex site but doesn't mean people are looking to see pictures of cocks thrusted in their face or 3 word mesaages asking things that are obvious

Grrrr, its so annoying!

Its a marathon not a sprint. Look at the bigger picture.. and dont be pushy.. no one will respond well to that!

Interested to hear others thoughts? "

its actually a swingers site not a sex site but people use it for what they like as its easily accessible, including using it as a sex site, its easier to ignore those you arent looking for and concentrate on those you are.

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

I don't have a problem with single men. By and large if I reply with a 'not interested' I get a polite message back. If not, I block.

I get as much, if not more grief/abuse/shitty messages from couples.

There is good and bad in all groups.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is the same with some women as well, I get some very poor messages. You, as a couple or single female, will always get more as there's lots more men.

Personally I think the messages I send are considerate and tailored to a profile, with my own personality in somewhere. But I don't often send many out.

I'd bet a decent amount of money that the guys who send those kind of messages rarely use the forums.

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By *eKoopleCouple
over a year ago

Germany / Manchester

You probably know that all decent clubs have strict rules so next time just speak to the staff and that will be the end of it x"

The one club it happens in has an exemplary policy for cutting the BS. As most clubs know a bad rep' is bad for business.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As someone said above be the hunter not the hunted. It works for us.

For every bad apple there are several good ones having a great time on here just doing what they do!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"As someone said above be the hunter not the hunted. It works for us.

For every bad apple there are several good ones having a great time on here just doing what they do!

And we do this. With good results. We are happy with lots of the site I'm just expressing our frustration with this part of the site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once again we seem to be the odd ones out !

We go out twice a week for spontaneous sex , mainly at a local dogging spot .

A face pic , a cock pic and a fancy some fun message work perfectly for us !

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

I wouldn't say most... but it is a high percentage to be fair.

It's all part of entitlement culture, on Fab it gets flipped on it's head somewhat and the moronic "wanna fuk?" lot can't handle it.

A similar thing happens with some couples when they contact single guys, they seem to think it's okay to list demands and treat them as a stunt cock.

Just follow the one rule for life: don't be a dick

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't get that many to bother us really.

Couples seem almost as bad as single men for not taking no for a answer in my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It is the same with some women as well, I get some very poor messages. You, as a couple or single female, will always get more as there's lots more men.

Personally I think the messages I send are considerate and tailored to a profile, with my own personality in somewhere. But I don't often send many out.

I'd bet a decent amount of money that the guys who send those kind of messages rarely use the forums. "

I have to agree. Any messages I have received from guys who regularly contribute to the forums have always been well considered and much longer than three words

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is it that most single guys dont have a clue of how to use this site and insisit on sending inappropriate or irrelevant messages to couples and Im guessing women too.

So much so that most profiles are littered with rules and "dont message this".. (ours included!)

Is it that hard to understand how this works?

This is a sex site but doesn't mean people are looking to see pictures of cocks thrusted in their face or 3 word mesaages asking things that are obvious

Grrrr, its so annoying!

Its a marathon not a sprint. Look at the bigger picture.. and dont be pushy.. no one will respond well to that!

Interested to hear others thoughts? "

The problem with your rant it that you assume that everyone wants to use the site the way you do, and are looking for the same, and that is the "correct " way to use it.

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By *kin BohnerMan
over a year ago

derby

[Removed by poster at 03/01/15 10:21:33]

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By *kin BohnerMan
over a year ago

derby

A marathon that seems to go on for bloody ever. I have been on here for a couple of years now and have only had a couple of meets! I have made friends with one couple though are yet to meet due to distance. I only message people looking to meet single guys my age or I may send a polite respectful compliment with no expectations of a meet or even a reply. Why is it single men always get the bashing, how about forcing others to reply to a polite well thought out message. Or what about the people that string you along with a few messages and just when you think its going well they start to ignore you. Or what about those that agree a meet and don't turn up with no explanation. Don't get me wrong I know SOME single guys give the rest of us a bad name but I am sure many of us are genuine nice guys needing a chance to prove it. There are plenty of ignorant and arrogant couples and single women on here!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Why is it that most single guys dont have a clue of how to use this site and insisit on sending inappropriate or irrelevant messages to couples and Im guessing women too.

So much so that most profiles are littered with rules and "dont message this".. (ours included!)

Is it that hard to understand how this works?

This is a sex site but doesn't mean people are looking to see pictures of cocks thrusted in their face or 3 word mesaages asking things that are obvious

Grrrr, its so annoying!

Its a marathon not a sprint. Look at the bigger picture.. and dont be pushy.. no one will respond well to that!

Interested to hear others thoughts? "

no offence.... you should see the stuff I get from some couples....... they seem not to be able to read either....

and have the teremity to thing I should be at their call anytime I am bestowed a meet.......

oooh.... it goes both ways.......

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Why is it that most single guys dont have a clue of how to use this site and insisit on sending inappropriate or irrelevant messages to couples and Im guessing women too.

So much so that most profiles are littered with rules and "dont message this".. (ours included!)

Is it that hard to understand how this works?

This is a sex site but doesn't mean people are looking to see pictures of cocks thrusted in their face or 3 word mesaages asking things that are obvious

Grrrr, its so annoying!

Its a marathon not a sprint. Look at the bigger picture.. and dont be pushy.. no one will respond well to that!

Interested to hear others thoughts? "

I only meet single guys. In seven years I've encountered the occasional clueless one, but it's a rarity, so your experience is a marked contrast to mine!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We blocked all single guys because we got fed up of their one liners, which is something we state on our profile we don't want sent to us as well as the random friend invites without even a wink or a message ( something else we state that we don't like )

It's a shame because we do like playing with guys too but they make it so hard and the majority ruined IT for the good ones

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm currently not meeting my profile says that. I still get messages from men, couples & women (who I'm not even looking for).

The only way to stop this is to turn on all filters but as it doesn't bother me I don't do this.

If it's becoming a problem for you then that's the solution you should adopt.

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By *ncutgemMan
over a year ago

Bath ish

It why the spammers keep on and on and on because one in a million hits they get lucky and it wotks

They should do sex education lessons for guys but I dont complain its the main reason i have been so fortunate over the years to have met and seduced so many beautiful couples and women and I mean beuatiful - I talk to them

And treat them as if they were human beings

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

i think the point is that an arse is arse regardless of whether that is a single couple..... shock.... a couple..... or heaven forbid.... a single woman!!!!

thread like this just look like people hoping on the bashing single guys bandwagon, when the funny thing is that when i go to clubs, you see most of the "arsey" behaviour made by couples........the getting d*unk, the touching without permission, actually the odd arguement i have seen....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there should be a little welcome message when single guys sign up telling them the way this place works.

"Welcome and thank you for joining the fab swingers community, you are now one of 19 thousand males on the site, if one of the 5 thousand single females or couples are your preference then be prepared for rejection. If you send a message and it is deleted without a response please take that as "not interested" and move along to someone that is. If you are successful with women in your normal day to day life and get lots of attention then you should do well on here. Have pictures on your profile, if you don't want to display a public face picture those who send face pictures with their message tend to do better than those who don't. Have fun and don't get too disheartened"

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"i think the point is that an arse is arse regardless of whether that is a single couple..... shock.... a couple..... or heaven forbid.... a single woman!!!!

Some of the worst messages we've ever had are from couples.

Some of the worst behaviour we've seen in clubs has been that of single women.

Gender is no guarantee of behaviour.

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By *rsIdiotWoman
over a year ago

Bedworth

"Why is it single men always get the bashing "

I think mainly due to the simple fact that the largest proportion of the site membership is single men, meaning it leads to the largest proportion of these types of messages coming from them. Yes, women and couples can be just as bad, or sometimes worse. It's just that there are less of them on here, hence it doesn't happen as often so is not perceived as a problem

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By *oadrunner1000Man
over a year ago

coventry

Hello all

As a single guy on here I have to agree with you it's really difficult on here to make any progress because 99% of men ruin it for the 1% of us that can actually read a profile!!

Like had been mentioned before blocking everyone and searching is one solution. But from the other side of the fence it's hard to make yourself known in a polite and respectful way.

The chase, flirting and banter makes the whole experience far more exciting for everyone. I deliberately haven't got pictures of my manhood on my profile as I'm sure if anyone wanted to see they would ask not have it rammed in their face....

I think what would be a better solution would be a strike system if someone is blocked by 5 users in 6 months then they are banned for life and profile deleted or their profile pics are put into a name and shame list so at least you can avoid them at a club too if you happen to bump into them...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most of the single guys I have come across have been fine there are however the few that think they have chosen you and that guarantees action big family fortunes style cross there . This is a swinging site though some assume it is a meet fuck and don't speak site for you sexual pandas out there (eats shoots and leaves) that ain't swinging . It's about the social side aswell as the play my ex was a panda that's why I have gone solo x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hello all

As a single guy on here I have to agree with you it's really difficult on here to make any progress because 99% of men ruin it for the 1% of us that can actually read a profile!!

Like had been mentioned before blocking everyone and searching is one solution. But from the other side of the fence it's hard to make yourself known in a polite and respectful way.

Completely agree just wish there was more of the chase flirting and banter rather than the "Hey" brigade. This site would be more fun.

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By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

When I worked in retail, I kept in mind 2 sayings and I think they are relevant here.....

1. The masses are asses.

And 2. Never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hello all

As a single guy on here I have to agree with you it's really difficult on here to make any progress because 99% of men ruin it for the 1% of us that can actually read a profile!!

Like had been mentioned before blocking everyone and searching is one solution. But from the other side of the fence it's hard to make yourself known in a polite and respectful way.

That wouldn't work, a lot of people block after a polite no thanks to avoid further contact, not necessarily because they've been rude, pushy or abusive. Name and shame is open to abuse by some bitter people who have been politely turned down etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Argh! !!!!! Will you all stop saying that the idiots ruin it for the nice guys. They really really don't! !!! Only the unintelligent think that because one guy behaves like an arse that they are all the same. Grrrrr......

As you were. Turns out i need coffee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a couple who look for single males, we can honestly say that we have never once felt frustrated or angry with the quality or quantity of messages we get. Maybe we're a bit too chilled and need to stress out a bit more.

On the question of receiving cock pics, Op, when you plaster pics of your genitalia on your profile, it's a bit rich complaining when people send you pics of theirs. Maybe they think that's what you like.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Hello all

As a single guy on here I have to agree with you it's really difficult on here to make any progress because 99% of men ruin it for the 1% of us that can actually read a profile!!

I knew someone would say the "excuse de jour" at the moment.. and it really grinds my gears...

sorry.... the above it a kop out..... you don't determine my fate on the site... and I certainly do not determine yours!

its an easy way to excuse yourself... I am blameless and innocent... its all those nasty pasties other mens fault!!!

if it helps ya sleep at night.. keep thinking that, but it wont help your issue..... sometimes the hardest thing to do is look yourself in the mirror and ask:

"what can i do to make me better!

to make me stand out!

to be the best me i can!!!"

think of it like this...

I kinda like it how it is now... because the silly/stupid/arsey people do stand out.... the site give you the tools to make it work for you....to help you stand out!!! it is a huge jigsaw!!!

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Argh! !!!!! Will you all stop saying that the idiots ruin it for the nice guys. They really really don't! !!! Only the unintelligent think that because one guy behaves like an arse that they are all the same. Grrrrr......

As you were. Turns out i need coffee

White no sugar ta!!

Don't forget though - without this excuse people would have to accept that it's their own actions that affect the outcomes of their interactions on here!

And that'll never happen!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hello all

As a single guy on here I have to agree with you it's really difficult on here to make any progress because 99% of men ruin it for the 1% of us that can actually read a profile!!

I knew someone would say the "excuse de jour" at the moment.. and it really grinds my gears...

sorry.... the above it a kop out..... you don't determine my fate on the site... and I certainly do not determine yours!

its an easy way to excuse yourself... I am blameless and innocent... its all those nasty pasties other mens fault!!!

if it helps ya sleep at night.. keep thinking that, but it wont help your issue..... sometimes the hardest thing to do is look yourself in the mirror and ask:

"what can i do to make me better!

to make me stand out!

to be the best me i can!!!"

think of it like this...

I kinda like it how it is now... because the silly/stupid/arsey people do stand out.... the site give you the tools to make it work for you....to help you stand out!!! it is a huge jigsaw!!!

I agree with you on this one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can only speak from personal experience but I know I have had messages deleted in the "bulk delete" that some people carry out due to being bombarded with loads of similar one sentence messages that some send. It is frustrating when once you have read someone's profile and tailor a well thought out, respectful introductory message that you hope will be different from the norm and stand out that it just gets deleted without being read. I found out this happened after later chatting to a couple of people that had included me in the bulk delete and they explained why it had been deleted. I do feel sorry for the single women and the couples that do get bombarded with messages, a friend on here showed me her message inbox one night, it had over 80 unread messages from that day alone and the first 20 were all extremely similar - one sentence, no thought, no manners etc, I can understand why some would get fed up of reading message after message like that.

Having said that, I have also sent messages to people introducing myself, being a bit flirty, trying to stand out only to receive a reply saying "this is obviously a copy and paste" and then blocking me. Frustrating when you have actually made an effort but what can you do? It just seems to be the way of fab. If anything it has actually put me off messaging people.

I have seen many forum posts like this and I can't see there ever being a solution. Just have to hope that the nice folk out there that have manners and are here for the right reasons keep patient and read messages and give them their individual merit. These are the sort of people I would want to meet anyway.

Happy messaging everyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Something very funny about the initial post, the set of rules and then describing yourself as 'laid back' ??.

Joking apart, yes, it would be great if everyone on here was more selective and didn't spoil it for those of us that are more choosy, write a long message tailored to show how we match with the selected profile and then get the dreaded "unread deleted" and not even a look at our profile.

In your position I think I would simply block single males and go looking when you want one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is it that most single guys dont have a clue of how to use this site and insisit on sending inappropriate or irrelevant messages to couples and Im guessing women too.

So much so that most profiles are littered with rules and "dont message this".. (ours included!)

Is it that hard to understand how this works?

This is a sex site but doesn't mean people are looking to see pictures of cocks thrusted in their face or 3 word mesaages asking things that are obvious

Grrrr, its so annoying!

Its a marathon not a sprint. Look at the bigger picture.. and dont be pushy.. no one will respond well to that!

Interested to hear others thoughts? "

Good post OP, often wondered, do the 'want a fuck' brigade ever get anywhere?

It is a sex site, but sex isn't just about 'filling a hole' (not for me anyway) so much more to be had, the tactile sensual side of things, touching, rubbing, stroking, the passionate kissing, and yes, the hard dirty fucking.

.....Sorry, carried away with myself, feeling particularly horny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Something very funny about the initial post, the set of rules and then describing yourself as 'laid back' ??.

In your position I think I would simply block single males and go looking when you want one."

Can you not have rules and preferences if you're laid back then ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Something very funny about the initial post, the set of rules and then describing yourself as 'laid back' ??.

In your position I think I would simply block single males and go looking when you want one.

Can you not have rules and preferences if you're laid back then ?"

Think the point is that someone who is laid back wouldn't let it bother them enough to create a thread moaning. ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Something very funny about the initial post, the set of rules and then describing yourself as 'laid back' ??.

In your position I think I would simply block single males and go looking when you want one.

Can you not have rules and preferences if you're laid back then ?

Think the point is that someone who is laid back wouldn't let it bother them enough to create a thread moaning. ...."

This place can make the most laid back people moan at times !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because most men are clueless without a woman in their life

Hex

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Because most men are clueless without a woman in their life

Hex"

yeah right... I am cool single.

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By *oveSlutForUseCouple
over a year ago

Brighton

"Because most men are clueless without a woman in their life

Hex"

Please don't be a sexist cliche, it's insulting to anyone with a modicum of intelligence.

OP, you are entirely correct. Why don't single males make much effort?

Well, have you asked them? Occasionally, we do and the answer is always the same:

"Because noone ever replies anyway"

So it's become a little chicken and egg, really.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Something very funny about the initial post, the set of rules and then describing yourself as 'laid back' ??.

In your position I think I would simply block single males and go looking when you want one.

Can you not have rules and preferences if you're laid back then ?

Think the point is that someone who is laid back wouldn't let it bother them enough to create a thread moaning. ....

This place can make the most laid back people moan at times !"

Not me

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Well, have you asked them? Occasionally, we do and the answer is always the same:

"Because noone ever replies anyway"

So it's become a little chicken and egg, really."

100%

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Something very funny about the initial post, the set of rules and then describing yourself as 'laid back' ??.

In your position I think I would simply block single males and go looking when you want one.

Can you not have rules and preferences if you're laid back then ?

Think the point is that someone who is laid back wouldn't let it bother them enough to create a thread moaning. ....

This place can make the most laid back people moan at times !

Not me"

Oh I bet you do moan sometimes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From my experience in this site I thing most men have the wrong attitude towards it. I'm not here to have sex with anybody and everybody like a lot of the guys on here. I'm here at the off chance of meeting people I am genuinely attracted too. Fully understand that's unlikely because I have very high standards but I'm not bothered, I enjoy reading the forums etc anyway as it's interesting. Maybe if a lot of guys took this attitude instead they'd have a bit more luck. Quality not quantity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Something very funny about the initial post, the set of rules and then describing yourself as 'laid back' ??.

In your position I think I would simply block single males and go looking when you want one.

Can you not have rules and preferences if you're laid back then ?

Think the point is that someone who is laid back wouldn't let it bother them enough to create a thread moaning. ....

This place can make the most laid back people moan at times !

Not me

Oh I bet you do moan sometimes

If the guy hits the right spot

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

"Something very funny about the initial post, the set of rules and then describing yourself as 'laid back' ??.

In your position I think I would simply block single males and go looking when you want one."

I don't see any inconsistency in describing oneself as laid back and having preferences...

Profiles can be _iewed in stealth mode which may then often trigger message deletion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think the point is that someone who is laid back wouldn't let it bother them enough to create a thread moaning. ...."

Precisely!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Because most men are clueless without a woman in their life

Hex

yeah right... I am cool single."

i am sorry _iew, being a clueless single man... that went over my head...

in fact just learnt not to scrape my knuckles on the floor when i walk.. the joy of pain walking!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel your frustration.

As a single guy on here I get very frustrated with the guys you refer to because they make it so much more difficult for the genuine guys on here.

I always take time to read and understand a woman's or a couples profile and if I think I do not match their criteria I do not get in touch! why bother because they will not reply and thats what a lot of guys on here need to understand.

I've been on here a few years and yes I've sent a hell of a lot of messages, the majority of which dont get replied to, but I understand that if couples and ladies replied to every message they get they wouldnt actually have time for playing. I just take it as they are not interested. I dont take offense at that. At the end of the day everyone as their own taste which is a personal thing and people shouldnt be offended if they are not to someone else's taste.

I have found that being polite and friendly and answering the questions that are in a ladies or couples profile get me much further then one liners that tell them nothing about you! And whilst this is a sex site, people are human beings and needed to be treated with respect.

So to finish off.....single guys who read this, if you cant be respectful then please bugger off so you dont ruin it for the genuine single guys who are on here! Thanks

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By *ominantDogMan
over a year ago

Docklands, Exmoor, Manchester

Woah, woah, woah, sweet child of mine!

could everybody please stop advising single men of the best way to use this site.

I feel as though my competitive advantage is being eroded with every piece of well meaning advice...and I need all the advantage I can get...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyway, the point of the original is valid. If single males could be a little more selective these rules and stipulations wouldn't appear all over everyone's profiles.

I expected everyone on here to be 'laid back' and relatively uninhibited. Preferences are understandable but a list of rules before we have even communicated tends to put me off (so it works, then!) Lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A ton of single guys do not or cannot grasp the meaning of 'swinging'.

It isn't some pay-for-_iew (regardless of optional the subscription) cam site where people are obligated to reply.

Not just exclusive to guys, but it's mostly us. Respect all around, people

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

in fact just learnt not to scrape my knuckles on the floor when i walk.. the joy of pain walking!!!!

Keep up the good work

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

and along come the white knights...... the sound of hoofs was the giveaway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyway, the point of the original is valid. If single males could be a little more selective these rules and stipulations wouldn't appear all over everyone's profiles.

Do you really believe that? Those that feel the need to dictate how others should behave will always do it. ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Apologies if anyone found my post offensive, I didn't mean it to come across that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Apologies if anyone found my post offensive, I didn't mean it to come across that way."

I think we're all having a little light-hearted fun in here; I wouldn't take any of it too seriously, I don't. People get too easily upset nowadays.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why is it that most single guys dont have a clue of how to use this site and insisit on sending inappropriate or irrelevant messages to couples and Im guessing women too.

So much so that most profiles are littered with rules and "dont message this".. (ours included!)

Is it that hard to understand how this works?

This is a sex site but doesn't mean people are looking to see pictures of cocks thrusted in their face or 3 word mesaages asking things that are obvious

Grrrr, its so annoying!

Its a marathon not a sprint. Look at the bigger picture.. and dont be pushy.. no one will respond well to that!

Interested to hear others thoughts?

The problem with your rant it that you assume that everyone wants to use the site the way you do, and are looking for the same, and that is the "correct " way to use it. "

Firstly, we didn't wish for our comments to be seen as a "rant"

I accept that this site is a "vehicle" for many different wishes, expressions of thought and opportunities of experiences.

BUT my issue is people not taking any time to read what your individual wishes and thoughts are or ignore them and blatantly steam ahead with their own agenda. That is my issue and it can't be argued with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks for the replies..

We are on top of this now. Just seems a shame as so many guys could do much better on here

Perhaps I should start a business like in the film Hitch.. but "Sexual Hitch"

hahaha"
"sexual hitch is that a new STI lol xxxxx

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

...... and the point may by a hell of a lot of people who have commented on this thread is that it is not just single men who are guilty....

a lot of couples are guilty of the same thing....

a lot of single women are guilty of the same thing.....

but that is not acknowledged by you in the opening post.... or in any other posts you have put up in response in this thread........

I was tempted to say it was "bordering" on being extremely condescending.... but there is no bordering about it......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't have a problem with single men. By and large if I reply with a 'not interested' I get a polite message back. If not, I block.

I get as much, if not more grief/abuse/shitty messages from couples.

There is good and bad in all groups."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It why the spammers keep on and on and on because one in a million hits they get lucky and it wotks

And treat them as if they were human beings

'As if they were human beings'!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Something very funny about the initial post, the set of rules and then describing yourself as 'laid back' ??.

In your position I think I would simply block single males and go looking when you want one.

Can you not have rules and preferences if you're laid back then ?

Think the point is that someone who is laid back wouldn't let it bother them enough to create a thread moaning. ....

This place can make the most laid back people moan at times !"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

completely agree with Op too many guys just ignore or don't bother reading profiles and then just act like horny teenagers ..it isn't sexy it isn't romantic or anything else.. we block all single guys who bother us now.. and the obviously half couples where the fem isn't even aware etc.once you do that though it sure quietens down so don't get mad get even Op..stay safe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couldn't agree more. One of our pet peeves is single guys who message us and address the female only...d'oh!

Highly disrespectful and always results in the block stick being used.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Couldn't agree more. One of our pet peeves is single guys who message us and address the female only...d'oh!

Highly disrespectful and always results in the block stick being used."

the best filter you have.. love ours

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

My thoughts are let the losers do what they do and use naff messages as a filter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ditto that. We've had that happen to us. Some guys have been so so pushy & haven't taken a polite hint. The worst being eurekas. It was like groups of guys acting together. Spoilt the night.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Behind every one line message is a person. They may be misguided,inexperienced or just horny,but they are still people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Behind every one line message is a person. They may be misguided,inexperienced or just horny,but they are still people. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Single Guy Experience...

You write a profile. Don't get any messages.

You follow the advice in the forums. Put up cock pics, remove cock pics. Be funny, be serious, readnprofiles, ignoe profiles. You try every trick in the book to generate interest, with a greater or lesser amount of success.

You read a profile you like, apparently tick all the boxes. You spend time writing a witty, well worded, non sexual letter of introduction.

It gets deleted. You move on.

Repeat, repeat, repeat.

Delete delete delete.

You sometimes get to the point where you try a quick, hi how are you? On the basis of:

A. You are probably going to get deleted.

B. If you do get a response, you will find that you probably, eventually not be what the couple are after

Yes, a thousand hi, how are you messages are dull, repetitive and boring.

But if every single guy was to turn round and not message anyone, there would be threads galore asking what is wrong with us.

I never send fancy a fuck messages, but now I won't send long messages as I know I won't get anywhere anyway...

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By *kin BohnerMan
over a year ago

derby

"The Single Guy Experience...

You write a profile. Don't get any messages.

You read a profile you like, apparently tick all the boxes. You spend time writing a witty, well worded, non sexual letter of introduction.

It gets deleted. You move on.

Repeat, repeat, repeat.

Delete delete delete.

You sometimes get to the point where you try a quick, hi how are you? On the basis of:

A. You are probably going to get deleted.

B. If you do get a response, you will find that you probably, eventually not be what the couple are after

Yes, a thousand hi, how are you messages are dull, repetitive and boring.

But if every single guy was to turn round and not message anyone, there would be threads galore asking what is wrong with us.

I never send fancy a fuck messages, but now I won't send long messages as I know I won't get anywhere anyway...

Very well put.

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By *rummiePartyManMan
over a year ago

birmingham

I love the way that SINGLE guys get the brunt of the blame.

Did you know that half of every couple consists of s GUY too? The number of "couples" I get messages off profiles where you just know that it's a bloke on an ego trip and who can get away with anything because there is (supposedly) a female in the background somewhere...

That's the problem for ya! BLOKES! Ban the lot of them. That'll sort it all out for you.

er, wait a minute, what am I saying???

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By *entleman JimmyMan
over a year ago

Hove

It's just "life is like that", people are people and they behave the way people do. No getting away from it no sense getting wound up about it. Oh, if only I could take my own advice....

Seriously, though, when people are anonymous, behind nicknames and avatars, their behaviour deteriorates - it's not just here or on similar sites - what about all the fuss about trolls on Twitter etc? It's a shame but it's also a fact.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah yeah yeah..... I bet you wouldn't block any single women and we know they can say fancy a fuck and most couples would say yes lol.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yeah yeah yeah..... I bet you wouldn't block any single women and we know they can say fancy a fuck and most couples would say yes lol."

True! But

If they were that blatant I would insist on verifying them straight away as something that seems too good to be true usually is.

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