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Let down ( possible rant )

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Maybe I haven't given it a chance by not being here long enough but am getting to the point where I'm thinking this is a gay site. Fed up with looking at my account and seeing more men message me/look at me than women. I came here for women but as a single guy, I can see the irony because as a swinging community there's a lot of closed minds. Men who want two women, couples blocking singles, age restrictions. Where is the culture? I thought that swinging was from free expression of love. Instead it seems that everybody is out for themselves, all for a fuck. I haven't had sex in 10 years. It seems more trouble than it's worth.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Switch on your message filters so you don't get any from single males. Getting them from females is a much harder task.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes we are all out for ourselves. Why else do you think people are on here? Thinking that this is an expression of free love or shag anything site you will be sadly disappointed. You may want to think about your expectations of this site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would you have sex with every woman who asked you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Swinging started as wife swapping thats what a lot of couples want. So the wife gets you, what does the husband get? Single women are outnumbered probably 100 to 1 by single men so getting one to meet you is like winning the lottery. This isnt a 1960's hippy commune. If you want a no strings garunteed shag call an escort!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The site gives you tools for success, use them.

Did you expect people to be here for others benefit? Your illusions are shattered, people are here for their own gratification first and foremost while bringing gratification to those they chose to have join them.

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By *onestjohn1962Man
over a year ago

Sheffield


"Swinging started as wife swapping thats what a lot of couples want. So the wife gets you, what does the husband get? Single women are outnumbered probably 100 to 1 by single men so getting one to meet you is like winning the lottery. This isnt a 1960's hippy commune. If you want a no strings garunteed shag call an escort!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

U have to put a lot off work in as a single male . Go to a club or swingers party Iv been on site for two years and am talkin to some lovely woman and couples . It takes time and effort and you will get lots off knock backs , it's part off swinging !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are your messages like this? If I received a message from someone saying they hadn't had sex in 10 years, I'd be put off.

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By *oo hotCouple
over a year ago

North West


"Maybe I haven't given it a chance by not being here long enough but am getting to the point where I'm thinking this is a gay site. Fed up with looking at my account and seeing more men message me/look at me than women. I came here for women but as a single guy, I can see the irony because as a swinging community there's a lot of closed minds. Men who want two women, couples blocking singles, age restrictions. Where is the culture? I thought that swinging was from free expression of love. Instead it seems that everybody is out for themselves, all for a fuck. I haven't had sex in 10 years. It seems more trouble than it's worth. "

You need to re-evaluate what this and why you are here. You will have far more chance of regular sex on a conventional dating site than on here.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Of course I'm out for myself. Who else would I be out for?

The problem with some people on the site is that they thing its all about sex, and that all they had to do was join and they would have willing partners on tap (I'm one of them by the way), but its hard work. Messaging, meeting, not clicking, messaging more, having them deleted, and so on. Best thing to do is concentrate on the social side. Get to any nearby socials, or save up for a club meet. Get known, and you'll get verified, then you'll get taken more seriously.

Posting 'woe is me' posts on the forum is not going to help at all.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Not much evidence of an alpha male person in your thread, OP. You can't tell if I've looked at you cos I'm in stealth mode. So might a lot of people be. It's a little immature IMO to seriously ask if the site is gay purely because you're not getting any action. Lots of people ARE getting meets on here.

You might have to re-evaluate your expectations - what did you want out of the site?

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By *rsIdiotWoman
over a year ago

Bedworth

What were you expecting, instashag? Did you think that you'd be knee deep in pussy, have them queuing up to meet you? Were you expecting to have them drop their knickers just because you like the look of them? It seems that you're going to be very disappointed if those are the case!

I think that a definite reevaluation of your expectations is in order! The ladies and couples here are not here for your pleasure, they are here for their own pleasure. They will all have preferences and know what they are looking for.

The sooner you realise that what you're expecting is nothing like swinging, the sooner you'll start to enjoy your time here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

do what I do

block who you don't want to talk to and don't search anyone,i don't I just wait for people to message me

don't give the ignorant ones a chance to blank you

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

"s. Men who want two women, couples blocking singles, age restrictions. Where is the culture? I thought that swinging was from free expression of love. Instead it seems that everybody is out for themselves, all for a fuck."

This says it all to me. Why else would we be on here??? I didn't join to fuck anyone that asked even if I didn't find them attractive. Some couples only want to meet couples so why wouldn't they block singles? Would you rather be able to take the time to send them a message to be told no thanks. And I hate to point out that you have age restrictions on your profile too!!!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Maybe I haven't given it a chance by not being here long enough but am getting to the point where I'm thinking this is a gay site. Fed up with looking at my account and seeing more men message me/look at me than women. I came here for women but as a single guy, I can see the irony because as a swinging community there's a lot of closed minds. Men who want two women, couples blocking singles, age restrictions. Where is the culture? I thought that swinging was from free expression of love. Instead it seems that everybody is out for themselves, all for a fuck. I haven't had sex in 10 years. It seems more trouble than it's worth. "

if thats the attitude you are coming in with... i am guessing not a lot will come out....

you aren't owed just because you are here..... and yes... grumbles after 2 weeks does make me wonder what the expectation is... people don't just drop their knickers because you glanced in their direction!

and now you have made a grumble... more men will look at your profile... its self fulfilling really.....

swinging isn't a service where people are duty bound to give to whoever wants it..... you get out what you put it... the site gives you the tools to make it work and work for you....

use all, use some, use none!!! that at the end of the day is on you!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe I haven't given it a chance by not being here long enough but am getting to the point where I'm thinking this is a gay site. Fed up with looking at my account and seeing more men message me/look at me than women. I came here for women but as a single guy, I can see the irony because as a swinging community there's a lot of closed minds. Men who want two women, couples blocking singles, age restrictions. Where is the culture? I thought that swinging was from free expression of love. Instead it seems that everybody is out for themselves, all for a fuck. I haven't had sex in 10 years. It seems more trouble than it's worth. "

Free expression of love does not mean shag anything!!? Or should people on here just give it up freely to anyone?

Why would people not be out for themselves on here? It's not a charity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So you haven't had a shag for 10 years ?

If you can't get one anywhere else, what makes you think you'll get one here ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So you haven't had a shag for 10 years ?

If you can't get one anywhere else, what makes you think you'll get one here ?"

Because he is Alpha!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men complaining about stuff like this just makes me giggle... Welcome to life as a woman, men staring, unwanted make attention, unwanted comments.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Men complaining about stuff like this just makes me giggle... Welcome to life as a woman, men staring, unwanted make attention, unwanted comments.

"
nice legs x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't think of much worse than a guy who describes himself as "alpha".

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

I see the OP has not come back online to acknowledge or answer any of the comments made. I don't knoow what reaction he is expecting in declaring he hasn't had sex in ten years...maybe multiple sympathy shags from day one? As that has not happened straight away, then those who have denied him have "closed minds" with preferences and age restrictions....how selfish of them!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Second woe is me post from the OP and he's only been here 2weeks. I'm putting my money on UNLOS by the end of the week.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe I haven't given it a chance by not being here long enough but am getting to the point where I'm thinking this is a gay site. Fed up with looking at my account and seeing more men message me/look at me than women. I came here for women but as a single guy, I can see the irony because as a swinging community there's a lot of closed minds. Men who want two women, couples blocking singles, age restrictions. Where is the culture? I thought that swinging was from free expression of love. Instead it seems that everybody is out for themselves, all for a fuck. I haven't had sex in 10 years. It seems more trouble than it's worth. "

So who are you here for if it isn't yourself?! You have had offers of sex from the sounds of it, so who's fault is it you haven't had any, after all of your looking for a free expression of love why should sexuality stop you from getting some action? Or are you allowed preferences whereas everyone else is closed minded?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all get lots of guys looking at our profiles but its the fun meets with the glorious hot ladies, couples and parties that makes your day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Moans about men checking your profile out and saying your not interested in men. But then in the next breath you say everybody has closed minds.

Just a suggestion open your own mind and meet the men who have been checking you out.

You then get to have sex. Win win!!

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By *SweetVioletxWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I'm sorry is that the sound of the world's smallest violin?

So are you saying that being on a swinger site requires an open mind which will fuck anyone who asks?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reaching for the 'yawn' emoticon Zzzz

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By *oger ThatMan
over a year ago

essex

grow some balls

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if tis more trouble than its worth to you dont bother yourself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is a lot of people on here that are bi not gay so get it right op , bet you wouldn't mind seeing two BI women playing . Use your filters

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I'm sorry is that the sound of the world's smallest violin?

So are you saying that being on a swinger site requires an open mind which will fuck anyone who asks? "

No.....this is

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I'm sorry is that the sound of the world's smallest violin?

"

You mean this one?

A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm sorry is that the sound of the world's smallest violin?

You mean this one?

A"

I think that is due to be a very heavily used smiley!!

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By *SweetVioletxWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Ha ha damn you both & your fancy pant violins

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you have sex with every woman who asked you? "

Sadly, no woman has.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would you have sex with every woman who asked you?

Sadly, no woman has. "

a different attitude might alter that maybe

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Would you have sex with every woman who asked you?

Sadly, no woman has. "

Cheer up, Gazza....

Have a more positive outlook

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I see the OP has not come back online to acknowledge or answer any of the comments made. I don't knoow what reaction he is expecting in declaring he hasn't had sex in ten years...maybe multiple sympathy shags from day one? As that has not happened straight away, then those who have denied him have "closed minds" with preferences and age restrictions....how selfish of them!

"

Honestly I was expecting to be laughed at. Perhaps this thread was a reaction to the clique feel of the site. Maybe I'm nieve. There is an overwhelming reaction from alot of people who think that "you get out what you put in and I have to work for pussy so why shouldn't you." And people are "entitled" to their beliefs, no I am not one of those men who feels "entitled to pussy". My declaration was not meant to be shocking. In fact it's something that I never talk about. In terms of expectation, I'd be happy if there was one woman in the world who would say yes, which goes against the notion of swinging unless I shared her, which would be mutually discussed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I see the OP has not come back online to acknowledge or answer any of the comments made. I don't knoow what reaction he is expecting in declaring he hasn't had sex in ten years...maybe multiple sympathy shags from day one? As that has not happened straight away, then those who have denied him have "closed minds" with preferences and age restrictions....how selfish of them!

Honestly I was expecting to be laughed at. Perhaps this thread was a reaction to the clique feel of the site. Maybe I'm nieve. There is an overwhelming reaction from alot of people who think that "you get out what you put in and I have to work for pussy so why shouldn't you." And people are "entitled" to their beliefs, no I am not one of those men who feels "entitled to pussy". My declaration was not meant to be shocking. In fact it's something that I never talk about. In terms of expectation, I'd be happy if there was one woman in the world who would say yes, which goes against the notion of swinging unless I shared her, which would be mutually discussed. "

Emily says yes if you can be here before midnight tonight feel any better??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Single men threads are just not good for anyone, I just hope you take on board positive comments. There's plenty of guys on here who get what you're looking for, a real variety, so it's a lot easier if you try to progress things the right way.

Effort and understanding equals results

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would a more vanilla dating site then not work better for your needs?

This site serves our needs very well but ours are lot different to yours. We are happy having sexy meets with no strings and little kinks and deviations that we come across. You want a girlfriend which whilst not impossible on here is quite rare.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not had sex for 10 years yet you're an alpha male ..........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perhaps use the site to find out what's happening at swinging clubs or socials.

get out there rather than relying on cyberspace is present yourself

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By *r and mrs sanddancerCouple
over a year ago

BOLDON COLLIERY


"grow some balls"

if he hasn't had sex in 10yrs he will have them in a wheelbarrow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ive been on and off here for 18months...not had a single shag,had acouple of social meets...but thats it......

i soon learned early on that pussy wouldn't come flying at me like frisbees...i think a vast majority of single guys have that idea when they sign up....

so re evaluate your expections,get involved on the forums,be respectful,have a laugh with everyone....and if something happens it will.....and if not then hey...god loves a tryer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe I haven't given it a chance by not being here long enough but am getting to the point where I'm thinking this is a gay site. Fed up with looking at my account and seeing more men message me/look at me than women. I came here for women but as a single guy, I can see the irony because as a swinging community there's a lot of closed minds. Men who want two women, couples blocking singles, age restrictions. Where is the culture? I thought that swinging was from free expression of love. Instead it seems that everybody is out for themselves, all for a fuck. I haven't had sex in 10 years. It seems more trouble than it's worth. "

we are a couple and members of 10 swingers clubs. but would have to say if this site or any swingers site was the only way I could get pussy I would cut my fucking dick of .as its a waste of time it really is and we are saying that as a couple that have been swinging for over 10 years

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By *corpio67Man
over a year ago

hillingdon

I'm reliably informed that a hot shower is better than sex, !

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By *dam_TinaCouple
over a year ago

Hampshire

If you haven't had sex for 10 years I sure hope you've been wanking because when you eventually do you'll blow the poor girls head off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Second woe is me post from the OP and he's only been here 2weeks. I'm putting my money on UNLOS by the end of the week."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Second woe is me post from the OP and he's only been here 2weeks. I'm putting my money on UNLOS by the end of the week."

This.

These kind of posts are getting a real drag.

Why are they often from guys who call themselves "studs" or "alphas"? Maybe that very fact shows their "entitlement" attitude. Then they have the cheek to call themselves swingers.....usually can't accommodate either so provably more correctly called cheats...goes with the whole attitude really.

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

If I may suggest you put up Photos that appeal to women . Nothing exciting or entising in the profile. Maybe write a little about yourself.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If I may suggest you put up Photos that appeal to women . Nothing exciting or entising in the profile. Maybe write a little about yourself. "

What photos appeal to women? What exciting things should I write about? I have no idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I may suggest you put up Photos that appeal to women . Nothing exciting or entising in the profile. Maybe write a little about yourself.

What photos appeal to women? What exciting things should I write about? I have no idea. "

Do you want people to write your profile for you? Seriously if you can't write about yourself then how do you expect others to tell you what to put.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn


" Instead it seems that everybody is out for themselves, all for a fuck. "

why wouldn't they be...

I am only interested in my enjoyment within this world, now if I meet people I am want pleasure to be achieved by both but I don't own the other person's enjoyment. It's upto them

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)


"If I may suggest you put up Photos that appeal to women . Nothing exciting or entising in the profile. Maybe write a little about yourself.

What photos appeal to women? What exciting things should I write about? I have no idea. "

There's no magic wand people can wave, there's loads of threads offering advice e on profiles it's generic advice read them then use that information and put your personality into the text.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take a look around the forums there are loads of posts where people have been given advice on their profiles. Some take the advice and enjoy the site more others re post the same subject a few months later. You need to sell your self more and let people know what you bring to the party. Good luck hopefully it will work out for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll add my bit as yet another single male who the site IS working for...

Get yourself some new pics, ladies don't just want to see your cock and a hastily lifted shirt torso pic...use a bit of thought and take the time to get some half decent pics taken, your mobile with the self timer is your friend here, I'd make at least one of them a face pic, obscure part of you wish but have a clear one you can send with a message...

Get onto the chat rooms on camera taking the time to have a laugh, you'll probably find someone will verify you happily if you've chatted to them Ann hour or so....and yes...new profile text time, your profile is your billboard, sell yourself, ladies here like to chat and if you've not put any effort into your profile then they're likely to assume you won't in conversation...

Joining in the forums helps too, but only if you do it by joining the banter, moaning your lack of success is kinda pitiful

So put on your big boy pants, dry your eyes and do something positive with your profile....oh...and stop whining

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I may suggest you put up Photos that appeal to women . Nothing exciting or entising in the profile. Maybe write a little about yourself.

What photos appeal to women? What exciting things should I write about? I have no idea. "

Do a forum search to read previous threads on how to improve profiles would be a start. As above have said, you've only been on here for 2 weeks...your posts on this thread are longer than what you've put on your profile (little effort into your profile suggests liffle effort during a meet); you state you're 'straight', but you have men on your friends list (suggests to some that you're not straight); can't accommodate (suggests to some that you're not single) - all of these are 'red flags' to some who will past you by. Furthermore, whining about it in the forum won't get you any sympathy.

You need to 'sell' yourself by making your profile more appealing - a 'shop front' as it were. It's not for us to tell you what you should have on your profile, but to write a little more about yourself (not too personal), explain why can't you accommodate, what you could bring to a meet (without being too explicit) and what are your likes would be a start. In regards to pics, look on other profiles to get ideas. 2 same cock pics isn't much..

P

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe I haven't given it a chance by not being here long enough but am getting to the point where I'm thinking this is a gay site. Fed up with looking at my account and seeing more men message me/look at me than women. I came here for women but as a single guy, I can see the irony because as a swinging community there's a lot of closed minds. Men who want two women, couples blocking singles, age restrictions. Where is the culture? I thought that swinging was from free expression of love. Instead it seems that everybody is out for themselves, all for a fuck. I haven't had sex in 10 years. It seems more trouble than it's worth. "

what a silly immature op.

of course everyone is out for themselves on here. We certainly aren't on here for others enjoyment and just have to fuck anything that moves to keep others happy. We are on here for our enjoyment and if others enjoy our company then it's a bonus.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, you've only been on this site two weeks and have yet to write yourself a profile of any worth.

If you put some effort into your profile, avoid filling it with cock pics and send out carefully crafted messages to ladies whos profiles seem to match you, then the fun will begin.

Good luck and welcome to instashag, better known as Fab

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thank you.

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