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is sexual promiscuity and swinging intertwined?

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By *ieutenant OP   Man
over a year ago

london

Me and my female friends where discussing this issue. some argue alot of people with sexual promiscuity hide under the banner of swinging. As for me. I see no difference between the two. Mosly when you look at the definition of sexual promiscuous.

What is your opinion on this.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville


"Me and my female friends where discussing this issue. some argue alot of people with sexual promiscuity hide under the banner of swinging. As for me. I see no difference between the two. Mosly when you look at the definition of sexual promiscuous.

What is your opinion on this. "

nah - if I have a girlfriend, I cant say I have ever cheated. If I am single I am a free agent.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Me and my female friends where discussing this issue. some argue alot of people with sexual promiscuity hide under the banner of swinging. As for me. I see no difference between the two. Mosly when you look at the definition of sexual promiscuous.

What is your opinion on this.

nah - if I have a girlfriend, I cant say I have ever cheated. If I am single I am a free agent. "

Where does cheating come into it? The OP didn't mention cheating? I think the two do go hand in hand....to swing is surely to be promiscuous?

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

I don't think they do.

I am less promiscuous than most of my single female friends (with the exception of my friend who married her childhood sweetheart, and its only ever each other)

I would rather wait for the right encounter than have some d*unken fumble - I have never had a one night stand, and have had less sexual partners than most people I know. (I have also had long periods of celibacy when I didn't meet anyone I liked)

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville


"Me and my female friends where discussing this issue. some argue alot of people with sexual promiscuity hide under the banner of swinging. As for me. I see no difference between the two. Mosly when you look at the definition of sexual promiscuous.

What is your opinion on this.

nah - if I have a girlfriend, I cant say I have ever cheated. If I am single I am a free agent.

Where does cheating come into it? The OP didn't mention cheating? I think the two do go hand in hand....to swing is surely to be promiscuous?"

Promiscuity to me, is not having your sexual appetite satiated. If I have a girlfriend, thats all I need or I wouldn't be with her, whether it lasts or not is a different matter - but obviously there are different reasons for break ups, not just sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think they do.

I am less promiscuous than most of my single female friends (with the exception of my friend who married her childhood sweetheart, and its only ever each other)

I would rather wait for the right encounter than have some d*unken fumble - I have never had a one night stand, and have had less sexual partners than most people I know. (I have also had long periods of celibacy when I didn't meet anyone I liked)"

One could argue then that you aren't actually swinging just having sex sometimes when the right guy comes along?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Me and my female friends where discussing this issue. some argue alot of people with sexual promiscuity hide under the banner of swinging. As for me. I see no difference between the two. Mosly when you look at the definition of sexual promiscuous.

What is your opinion on this.

nah - if I have a girlfriend, I cant say I have ever cheated. If I am single I am a free agent.

Where does cheating come into it? The OP didn't mention cheating? I think the two do go hand in hand....to swing is surely to be promiscuous?

Promiscuity to me, is not having your sexual appetite satiated. If I have a girlfriend, thats all I need or I wouldn't be with her, whether it lasts or not is a different matter - but obviously there are different reasons for break ups, not just sex."

Promiscuity is surely having sex with multiple partners?

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)


"I don't think they do.

I am less promiscuous than most of my single female friends (with the exception of my friend who married her childhood sweetheart, and its only ever each other)

I would rather wait for the right encounter than have some d*unken fumble - I have never had a one night stand, and have had less sexual partners than most people I know. (I have also had long periods of celibacy when I didn't meet anyone I liked)

One could argue then that you aren't actually swinging just having sex sometimes when the right guy comes along?"

You made a presumption there... I never said I only met single guys. I have met couples, and have also met couples with the partner (male and female) I have been with... just never had any one night stands - everyone I have played with has been more than a one off.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville


"Me and my female friends where discussing this issue. some argue alot of people with sexual promiscuity hide under the banner of swinging. As for me. I see no difference between the two. Mosly when you look at the definition of sexual promiscuous.

What is your opinion on this.

nah - if I have a girlfriend, I cant say I have ever cheated. If I am single I am a free agent.

Where does cheating come into it? The OP didn't mention cheating? I think the two do go hand in hand....to swing is surely to be promiscuous?

Promiscuity to me, is not having your sexual appetite satiated. If I have a girlfriend, thats all I need or I wouldn't be with her, whether it lasts or not is a different matter - but obviously there are different reasons for break ups, not just sex.

Promiscuity is surely having sex with multiple partners?"

That is why I said: 'If I have a girlfriend I am by no means sexually promiscuous; If I dont, it is a completely different matter.'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think they do.

I am less promiscuous than most of my single female friends (with the exception of my friend who married her childhood sweetheart, and its only ever each other)

I would rather wait for the right encounter than have some d*unken fumble - I have never had a one night stand, and have had less sexual partners than most people I know. (I have also had long periods of celibacy when I didn't meet anyone I liked)

One could argue then that you aren't actually swinging just having sex sometimes when the right guy comes along?

You made a presumption there... I never said I only met single guys. I have met couples, and have also met couples with the partner (male and female) I have been with... just never had any one night stands - everyone I have played with has been more than a one off."

Unless you are having relationships with them then surely that is still on a casual basis making it promiscuous?

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville


"I don't think they do.

I am less promiscuous than most of my single female friends (with the exception of my friend who married her childhood sweetheart, and its only ever each other)

I would rather wait for the right encounter than have some d*unken fumble - I have never had a one night stand, and have had less sexual partners than most people I know. (I have also had long periods of celibacy when I didn't meet anyone I liked)

One could argue then that you aren't actually swinging just having sex sometimes when the right guy comes along?

You made a presumption there... I never said I only met single guys. I have met couples, and have also met couples with the partner (male and female) I have been with... just never had any one night stands - everyone I have played with has been more than a one off.

Unless you are having relationships with them then surely that is still on a casual basis making it promiscuous?"

She said, she doesn't meet all the time and can go for months without meeting. Promiscuity would be a little more often than that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How often makes it promiscuous then?

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)


"I don't think they do.

I am less promiscuous than most of my single female friends (with the exception of my friend who married her childhood sweetheart, and its only ever each other)

I would rather wait for the right encounter than have some d*unken fumble - I have never had a one night stand, and have had less sexual partners than most people I know. (I have also had long periods of celibacy when I didn't meet anyone I liked)

One could argue then that you aren't actually swinging just having sex sometimes when the right guy comes along?

You made a presumption there... I never said I only met single guys. I have met couples, and have also met couples with the partner (male and female) I have been with... just never had any one night stands - everyone I have played with has been more than a one off.

Unless you are having relationships with them then surely that is still on a casual basis making it promiscuous?"

Not sure we are working on the same definition here...


" Promiscuous

ADJECTIVE

1. Having or characterized by many transient sexual relationships

2. Demonstrating or implying an unselective approach; indiscriminate or casual"

My swinging relationships have been long lasting friendships, many I am still friends with even when we are not being sexual. Bar one ex, I am friends with all previous partners, so it is neither indiscriminate nor casual. So whilst they are not romantic and in love relationships (never done that even 1on1), and we don't all live together, but they haven't been casual at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think they do.

I am less promiscuous than most of my single female friends (with the exception of my friend who married her childhood sweetheart, and its only ever each other)

I would rather wait for the right encounter than have some d*unken fumble - I have never had a one night stand, and have had less sexual partners than most people I know. (I have also had long periods of celibacy when I didn't meet anyone I liked)

One could argue then that you aren't actually swinging just having sex sometimes when the right guy comes along?

You made a presumption there... I never said I only met single guys. I have met couples, and have also met couples with the partner (male and female) I have been with... just never had any one night stands - everyone I have played with has been more than a one off.

Unless you are having relationships with them then surely that is still on a casual basis making it promiscuous?

Not sure we are working on the same definition here...

Promiscuous

ADJECTIVE

1. Having or characterized by many transient sexual relationships

2. Demonstrating or implying an unselective approach; indiscriminate or casual

My swinging relationships have been long lasting friendships, many I am still friends with even when we are not being sexual. Bar one ex, I am friends with all previous partners, so it is neither indiscriminate nor casual. So whilst they are not romantic and in love relationships (never done that even 1on1), and we don't all live together, but they haven't been casual at all."

So back to my previous point of this not actually being swinging.

Definition of swinger:

"Swing·er   (swngr)

n.

1. One that swings: a good swinger of baseball bats.

2. Slang

a. A person who actively seeks excitement and moves with the latest trends.

b. A person who engages freely in promiscuous sex.

c. A member of a couple, especially a married couple, who exchanges sexual partners."

Hence my point that the 2 go hand in hand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a tough one isn't it. I have met couples who admit that swinging helps keep them together, or have tried it as a last chance / attempt.

If a couple couldn't walk away from swinging, forever, would that mean they aren't fully in love - I'd say it just might. If one person, or both, in the relationship couldn't stop wanting others and acting upon it, it's either being unfaithful or being promiscuous, by definition I think?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its the same thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Me and my female friends where discussing this issue. some argue alot of people with sexual promiscuity hide under the banner of swinging. As for me. I see no difference between the two. Mosly when you look at the definition of sexual promiscuous.

What is your opinion on this.

nah - if I have a girlfriend, I cant say I have ever cheated. If I am single I am a free agent.

Where does cheating come into it? The OP didn't mention cheating? I think the two do go hand in hand....to swing is surely to be promiscuous?

Promiscuity to me, is not having your sexual appetite satiated. If I have a girlfriend, thats all I need or I wouldn't be with her, whether it lasts or not is a different matter - but obviously there are different reasons for break ups, not just sex.

Promiscuity is surely having sex with multiple partners?

That is why I said: 'If I have a girlfriend I am by no means sexually promiscuous; If I dont, it is a completely different matter.'"

If you and your girlfriend meet other couples for sex, then you are a swinger. If not, and you are exclusive with each other, then you look less like a swinger and more like Fab is Insta-Shag to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would see promiscuity as regular sexual contact with multiple partners. More or less the same as swinging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Promiscuity is the word used for immoral amounts of sex. It's actually quite a negative concept, although to some extent it's been appropriated into 'having lots of sex' without the negative connotations.

Swinging isn't a word with the same kind of negative connotations.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't feel negative connotations from the word personally. I quite like it

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville


"Me and my female friends where discussing this issue. some argue alot of people with sexual promiscuity hide under the banner of swinging. As for me. I see no difference between the two. Mosly when you look at the definition of sexual promiscuous.

What is your opinion on this.

nah - if I have a girlfriend, I cant say I have ever cheated. If I am single I am a free agent.

Where does cheating come into it? The OP didn't mention cheating? I think the two do go hand in hand....to swing is surely to be promiscuous?

Promiscuity to me, is not having your sexual appetite satiated. If I have a girlfriend, thats all I need or I wouldn't be with her, whether it lasts or not is a different matter - but obviously there are different reasons for break ups, not just sex.

Promiscuity is surely having sex with multiple partners?

That is why I said: 'If I have a girlfriend I am by no means sexually promiscuous; If I dont, it is a completely different matter.'

If you and your girlfriend meet other couples for sex, then you are a swinger. If not, and you are exclusive with each other, then you look less like a swinger and more like Fab is Insta-Shag to you. "

I am a single guy, who is reasonably promiscuous if I don't have a girlfriend. I am only promiscuous outside of a relationship. That's why I said no, as I am a swinger, but inherently not promiscuous when in a relationship. What other people do is not my concern. I didn't think the topic was on what you want to call single guys on Fab?

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By *ieutenant OP   Man
over a year ago

london

Thanks for the healthy discussion regarding this topic. To me personally both words share almost the same meaning.

Look at peoples profile and see their verifications from different people. That speak volume for me. Keep it up.

I like to hear your side of the argument

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think they do.

I am less promiscuous than most of my single female friends (with the exception of my friend who married her childhood sweetheart, and its only ever each other)

I would rather wait for the right encounter than have some d*unken fumble - I have never had a one night stand, and have had less sexual partners than most people I know. (I have also had long periods of celibacy when I didn't meet anyone I liked)

One could argue then that you aren't actually swinging just having sex sometimes when the right guy comes along?

You made a presumption there... I never said I only met single guys. I have met couples, and have also met couples with the partner (male and female) I have been with... just never had any one night stands - everyone I have played with has been more than a one off.

Unless you are having relationships with them then surely that is still on a casual basis making it promiscuous?

Not sure we are working on the same definition here...

Promiscuous

ADJECTIVE

1. Having or characterized by many transient sexual relationships

2. Demonstrating or implying an unselective approach; indiscriminate or casual

My swinging relationships have been long lasting friendships, many I am still friends with even when we are not being sexual. Bar one ex, I am friends with all previous partners, so it is neither indiscriminate nor casual. So whilst they are not romantic and in love relationships (never done that even 1on1), and we don't all live together, but they haven't been casual at all.

So back to my previous point of this not actually being swinging.

Definition of swinger:

"Swing·er   (swngr)

n.

1. One that swings: a good swinger of baseball bats.

2. Slang

a. A person who actively seeks excitement and moves with the latest trends.

b. A person who engages freely in promiscuous sex.

c. A member of a couple, especially a married couple, who exchanges sexual partners."

Hence my point that the 2 go hand in hand.

"

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By *ipsTeaserCouple
over a year ago

here and there, thereabouts

I don't think they do.

To me promiscuous is many sexual encounters, swinging do not necessarily always equate to lots of numbers does it?

I have not had many partners, yet here I am on a swingers site. I still don't intend to have constant completely random partners that I haven't carefully considered. So I wouldn't consider myself promiscuous, adventurous perhaps.

Of course, that's just my interpretation ( and it suits me lol)

Always willing to be put on the right path! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To me, sexually promiscuous is suggestive of someone who has low or no standards when it comes to choosing sex partners. I don't think many swingers would wish to describe themselves in this way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To me, sexually promiscuous is suggestive of someone who has low or no standards when it comes to choosing sex partners. I don't think many swingers would wish to describe themselves in this way."

No of course they wouldn't wish to describe themselves as such. Others would though.

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley


"To me, sexually promiscuous is suggestive of someone who has low or no standards when it comes to choosing sex partners. I don't think many swingers would wish to describe themselves in this way.

No of course they wouldn't wish to describe themselves as such. Others would though."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I believe true swinging is an activity confined to those in a relationship and that single people are just promiscuous, but I do think for a couple to swing, there must be some level of promiscuity if your definition of promiscuous is multiple partners. Just my view though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me, I'd define someone being sexually promiscuous as a kind of scattergun approach. Someone swinging is different in their mind and how they approach it. Possibly more a hobby than a need.

But then I see people as being swingers in how they think and act, not defined by relationship status. Single people can be swingers. Some are, some aren't. Just as some couples aren't swingers, no matter how much they love to describe themselves that way.

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

... and then there are those who are the celibate swingers and the celibate promiscious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/12/14 07:03:04]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Philosophically, "Whether a person is promiscuous or not depends on current social standards and the moral codes in effect at the time."

So first of all we need to figure out what those standards are, at this time. Obviously on a site like this the standards are more likely to be different from the majority of society that doesn't partake in this stuff. But even on here there are many different ideas on what being promiscuous means, dictionary definition has been posted already and their seems to be 2 definitions, people who have casual sex (no romantic attachments) and people who are indiscriminate. If you want to go off the dictionary standards then anyone who has no control over their sex life is promiscuous, and i don't think this applies to that many people at all because we usually choose who we want to sleep with and when. But many people will sleep with others they have no romantic attachment to, and this is considered promiscuous as well (technically someone in a dead marriage who is still having sex with their partner could be considered promiscuous as well and we'd never think of them that way really coz they've only been with one person all their life).

"What sexual behavior is considered promiscuous varies between cultures, as does the prevalence of promiscuity, with different standards often being applied to different genders and civil status" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Promiscuity

I don't even think there is a moral societal standard for sexual promiscuity any more, unless you are part of a group that defines it (religion for example). So fuck knows if swingers are promiscuous, it's down to the individual themselves to decide what part of society they are really and then base it off that, if they really want to or care.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Neither I nor my wife have ever been promiscuous. No one night stands for either of us in our past sexual history.

We love swinging though.

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By *ort_AdmiralMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

I don't use the word promiscuous. I prefer gregarious.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't use the word promiscuous. I prefer gregarious. "

I prefer anal. Have I gone off topic again though?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all know words are very powerful! Sexually adventurous sounds very positive - promiscuous perhaps less so - yet they can describe the same lifestyle.

Another example is size - bbw/cuddly/'fabulous'all sound positive - obese doesn't.

Insatiable sounds good - nymphomaniac perhaps less so!

We can debate/argue words and phraseology as much as we like - but essentially we're on here because we like great sex with one or more people that we're not in a loving relationship with - aren't we? Xxx

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By *eakcoupleCouple
over a year ago

peak district

When we were young and starting off, we were both promiscuous - now we're swingers. Then, we were experimenting, now we know what we like and don't need to experiment. Either way, sex with plenty of other people is involved - and why not?

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By *ieutenant OP   Man
over a year ago

london

Is amazing to see different connotation regarding promiscuity and swinging. To clear up the controversy.let have a look at the definition of both.

promiscuity is the practice of having casual sex frequently with different partners or being indiscriminate in the choice of sexual partners

Swinging,is a non-monogamous behavior, in which both singles and partners in a committed relationship engage in sexual activities with others as a recreational or social activity.

Hope this will help both side of the argument

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To me, sexually promiscuous is suggestive of someone who has low or no standards when it comes to choosing sex partners. I don't think many swingers would wish to describe themselves in this way.

No of course they wouldn't wish to describe themselves as such. Others would though."

I used to disagree with most of your views in forums but over the last two weeks, I am agreeing with almost everything you say. Have you had a personality transplant or have I?

Back to OP's question? Why the need for the distinction? It seems an attempt to generate a hierarchy. What tends to follow hierarchies is judgements/snobbery. Like a burglar who thinks a mugger is the lowest of the low.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is amazing to see different connotation regarding promiscuity and swinging. To clear up the controversy.let have a look at the definition of both.

promiscuity is the practice of having casual sex frequently with different partners or being indiscriminate in the choice of sexual partners

Swinging,is a non-monogamous behavior, in which both singles and partners in a committed relationship engage in sexual activities with others as a recreational or social activity.

Hope this will help both side of the argument"

Weeeeeellll - as a single I do have relatively frequent casual sex - but i'm very choosy who it's with. I also engage in sex with others as a recreational/social activity - so what does that make me? - Oh yeah - a very happy lady!! xx (or a promiscuinger!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do swingers not have frequent casual sex with different partners? I think the key word here is indiscriminate to ascertain promiscuous behaviour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do swingers not have frequent casual sex with different partners? I think the key word here is indiscriminate to ascertain promiscuous behaviour "

I don't think the 'indiscriminate' implies they don't choose. More that choices are not defined by convention.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do swingers not have frequent casual sex with different partners? I think the key word here is indiscriminate to ascertain promiscuous behaviour

I don't think the 'indiscriminate' implies they don't choose. More that choices are not defined by convention."

What is a conventional way of choosing a sexual partner? A monogamous relationship usually has nothing to do with the sex. Swinging itself is unconventional,being discriminate means not being promiscuous and not having sex with everyone you meet. A gang bang where the woman doesn't choose who has sex with her and takes on all comers would be promiscuous by the definition quoted on here. Men who mail everyone with no concerns as to who says yes are being promiscuous too aren't they?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Swinging was invented so that married people could have sex with people that they arnt married too.

Promiscuity is sexual relations with multiple partners, it doesn't describe the decision making in the partner selection process.

So even if you only shag internet billionaires and footballers if you regularly have different partner you are promiscuous.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it sounds like some people are insecure about being swingers and need to find people they perceive to be doing something worse than they are to make themselves feel better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it sounds like some people are insecure about being swingers and need to find people they perceive to be doing something worse than they are to make themselves feel better."

Oh my....I actually find myself agreeing with you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Me and my female friends where discussing this issue. some argue alot of people with sexual promiscuity hide under the banner of swinging. As for me. I see no difference between the two. Mosly when you look at the definition of sexual promiscuous.

What is your opinion on this. "

I think there a lot who do its a promiscuous hobby after all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it sounds like some people are insecure about being swingers and need to find people they perceive to be doing something worse than they are to make themselves feel better."

I would rather not know about some things, so no it doesn't make me feel better about myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course there is a link but not necessarily both ways. Swingers are, pretty much by definition, promiscuous. But a promiscuous person isn't always a swinger!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think they do.

I am less promiscuous than most of my single female friends (with the exception of my friend who married her childhood sweetheart, and its only ever each other)

I would rather wait for the right encounter than have some d*unken fumble - I have never had a one night stand, and have had less sexual partners than most people I know. (I have also had long periods of celibacy when I didn't meet anyone I liked)

One could argue then that you aren't actually swinging just having sex sometimes when the right guy comes along?

You made a presumption there... I never said I only met single guys. I have met couples, and have also met couples with the partner (male and female) I have been with... just never had any one night stands - everyone I have played with has been more than a one off.

Unless you are having relationships with them then surely that is still on a casual basis making it promiscuous?

Not sure we are working on the same definition here...

Promiscuous

ADJECTIVE

1. Having or characterized by many transient sexual relationships

2. Demonstrating or implying an unselective approach; indiscriminate or casual

My swinging relationships have been long lasting friendships, many I am still friends with even when we are not being sexual. Bar one ex, I am friends with all previous partners, so it is neither indiscriminate nor casual. So whilst they are not romantic and in love relationships (never done that even 1on1), and we don't all live together, but they haven't been casual at all.

So back to my previous point of this not actually being swinging.

Definition of swinger:

"Swing·er   (swngr)

n.

1. One that swings: a good swinger of baseball bats.

2. Slang

a. A person who actively seeks excitement and moves with the latest trends.

b. A person who engages freely in promiscuous sex.

c. A member of a couple, especially a married couple, who exchanges sexual partners."

Hence my point that the 2 go hand in hand.

"

I agree with you Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it sounds like some people are insecure about being swingers and need to find people they perceive to be doing something worse than they are to make themselves feel better.

Oh my....I actually find myself agreeing with you "

It is the season of goodwill

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