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"i would not go there if i saw that many verifications " I think it all depends on if those veri's are actual sexual meets or a mix of sexual and social. But understand the apprehension with so many notches on that person's 'bedpost' if they were sexual meets. We like to meet people who have a life other than swinging. There's more to talk about then when on a social meet. Think some people can get a little obsessive about this lifestyle and wanting to meet every day. | |||
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"The person that I have in mind, their veris are actual sexual meets and with different people, didn't count the repeats or phone and web" See, that to me would scream 'obsessive', with no outside life or interests at all. I know we are all here for one ultimate purpose but surely there has to be priorities! | |||
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"Could be worse, someone with 5 verifications showing could have 200 hidden ![]() ![]() This,to us,is one of the problems with being able to hide verifications,you may end up meeting someone you would otherwise not entertain. ![]() ![]() | |||
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"We have only played with about a third of the people who have verified us, the rest are from socials etc, and our verifs span about 14 months. So, how often is "too often" for playing? Or, how many is "too many"? I wish someone would write the "Definative guide to swinging", with the rules and regulations all neatly laid out, as we seem to be going at it wrong. I didnt realise that we all had to be the same, conform to a standard number of "swing meets per month/year". Is there a limit to how many swing meets you can have before you have to retire as a swinger? Is it expected that we peruse others profiles and make "snap" judgements on them based on what we read, rather than trying to get to know them?" Second that. | |||
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"i'd like to give a different perspective here i was in a sexless marriage for a long time and have been having a wonderful time making up for it in here. i have very high standards and everyone i've met have had to work hard to meet me. everyone of them i have fancied too just because someone has had lots of meets doesnt make them obsessed, it means they're enjoying the site for its purpose! eaqch to their own - far too many judgemental people on this site!" Here here, I totally agree. Is it not a sex site? Just because I'm making up for lost time doesn't mean that I should be judged. | |||
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"Not sure whether it was Jed or Sasha that wrote that but whoever it was, point made perfectly. Mwah x" Thank you but it is always Jed on the forums unless otherwise stated (which has never happened yet because she could never get a word in edgeways ![]() | |||
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"We have only played with about a third of the people who have verified us, the rest are from socials etc, and our verifs span about 14 months. So, how often is "too often" for playing? Or, how many is "too many"? I wish someone would write the "Definative guide to swinging", with the rules and regulations all neatly laid out, as we seem to be going at it wrong. I didnt realise that we all had to be the same, conform to a standard number of "swing meets per month/year". Is there a limit to how many swing meets you can have before you have to retire as a swinger? Is it expected that we peruse others profiles and make "snap" judgements on them based on what we read, rather than trying to get to know them? Second that." Have to agree also ! Not all of our veris are from play meets - some are also social . We also occasionally meet guys that we originally met whilst on a previous site who aren`t on this one so there aren`t any veris from those ! Also , couples / guys that we`ve met from here on subsequent occasions we`ve not felt the need to verify for a second time etc . It`s all down to personal choices , preferences and percaeptions . Asl long as you`re happy with what you`re doing it`s no-one else`s business !!! | |||
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"I think what can be worse than a lot of verifications is verfications that go against the profile's preferences. To use a (made up) example, if someone said "no BBWs or smokers" then had verfications off both, well, that'd make us think for sure. " We say don't meet smokers, but if contacted by someone, we just ask politely if they smoke in the house? Many people these days won't or don't so we can easily meet them. Our problem only arises if I (Lynne) go into a smokey atmosphere, as I have asthma it can affect my breathing which rather ruins the evening somewhat!! ![]() | |||
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"Could be worse, someone with 5 verifications showing could have 200 hidden ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() But their is a simple way around your argument, once verified by a couple of people, tell others not to verify you. Also remember it's not only the amount of people you go with, it's the amount of people 'THEY' have been with too! | |||
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"so since i go to socials all over the country.. if I end up loads of varifications but they happen to be social... am I them being viewed differently by people? I reckon about half of mine are actually from social meets.... they may be from people that I have chatted to? am i looked at negitivly? serious question?" Yep...you're a tart!! ![]() ![]() | |||
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"so since i go to socials all over the country.. if I end up loads of varifications but they happen to be social... am I them being viewed differently by people? I reckon about half of mine are actually from social meets.... they may be from people that I have chatted to? am i looked at negitivly? serious question?" Fabio,we have chatted for a loooong time now on a couple of forums,I have to honestly say I have never even looked at your verifications,they hold no interest to me as I decide for myself about people and not what someone else tells me about them | |||
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"so since i go to socials all over the country.. if I end up loads of varifications but they happen to be social... am I them being viewed differently by people? I reckon about half of mine are actually from social meets.... they may be from people that I have chatted to? am i looked at negitivly? serious question?" Serious answer: Yes and No. Serious explanation: If someone gives your profile a once over and is worried about the *amount* of verifications, but cba to read them, then yes it'll work against you. No, if they can be bothered to read them, they will understand. | |||
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" it was from a single male and it said the things above but finished with "when I grow up I want to be just like Jed" " A poor mountaineer, barley kept his family fed ? Kirsty xxx xxx | |||
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"If I see a profile with verifications dated every week for a few months, then I begin to wonder when that person has had time to go for a check-up. In every case, I will ask for their check-up "history" and find out if they have any proof of their claims. A few weeks ago I asked a guy to go and have a check-up, and he came back positive for chlamydia !! Jane x" It only takes one meet to catch an STD .... Kirsty xxx xxx | |||
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"I will admit to avoiding profiles if a certain member has met them or is friends with them." Exactly,and that prerogative should not be taken away from you by being made optional. We all have preferences,people we'd rather not play with for whatever reason or the people they've met. So with us it's not really how many but who. It's doubtful there are many people on here who haven't been influenced in this way either,whether they admit it or not. XXXX | |||
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"If someone with loads of 'notches' practices safe sex - what's the problem? Or am I missing something?" no- you're not missing anything! What makes me smile is that some people think that the verifications here tell the full story! Like every meet peeps have are recorded here! May be true for some but................ get a grip! Z | |||
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"I will admit to avoiding profiles if a certain member has met them or is friends with them. Exactly,and that prerogative should not be taken away from you by being made optional. We all have preferences,people we'd rather not play with for whatever reason or the people they've met. So with us it's not really how many but who. It's doubtful there are many people on here who haven't been influenced in this way either,whether they admit it or not. XXXX" do you not think tho that you could be missing out on a good meet with a really nice person, to turn someone down because they have met someone you dont like just makes no sence at all to me ![]() | |||
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"Do you have a person on site, that if you see their name listed on someone else’s verifications, who has contacted you, you say “I’m not going there” because of the amount of people, the named person has been with in a short space of time, for example over 100 in six months? Sometimes, yes. It's one thing being "ethusiastic" and another having no real standards. That said, we shouldn't judge. Some people want to fuck anything anything with a hole or a cock, some don't." the assumtion you are making here is that that person plays with all present which may not be the case ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"i'd like to give a different perspective here i was in a sexless marriage for a long time and have been having a wonderful time making up for it in here. i have very high standards and everyone i've met have had to work hard to meet me. everyone of them i have fancied too just because someone has had lots of meets doesnt make them obsessed, it means they're enjoying the site for its purpose! eaqch to their own - far too many judgemental people on this site!" 2nd that! | |||
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"i'd like to give a different perspective here i was in a sexless marriage for a long time and have been having a wonderful time making up for it in here. i have very high standards and everyone i've met have had to work hard to meet me. everyone of them i have fancied too just because someone has had lots of meets doesnt make them obsessed, it means they're enjoying the site for its purpose! eaqch to their own - far too many judgemental people on this site! 2nd that!" me too and its always seems to be the couples who look down their noses at other, not all couples of course, i know lots of laid back nice couples, but lots of couples have their own ideas of what swinging should be like and lord be hold anyone who plays different!! | |||
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"Could be worse, someone with 5 verifications showing could have 200 hidden ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"I will admit to avoiding profiles if a certain member has met them or is friends with them. Exactly,and that prerogative should not be taken away from you by being made optional. We all have preferences,people we'd rather not play with for whatever reason or the people they've met. So with us it's not really how many but who. It's doubtful there are many people on here who haven't been influenced in this way either,whether they admit it or not. XXXX do you not think tho that you could be missing out on a good meet with a really nice person, to turn someone down because they have met someone you dont like just makes no sence at all to me ![]() But what if the person you turned down had been verified several times by someone who said on their profile that they "only did bareback with no exceptions". Would you still feel you were missing out,meet them and take the risk hoping that the condom didn't split,or simply say "No thank you!"? XXXX | |||
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"so just out of interest, a question for people who dont like no verifications but dont like to many, how many verifications is the right amount to have before your not judged for having none or for having to many? Its a swingers site, isnt the idea of this site to meet for NSA sex? there for your going to meet lots of people, and all because you have met lots of people does not mean you have no standards, theres thousands of people on this site so if you have met 50 thats nothing really, its quite easy to go thro the profiles and find 50 people your attracted to on here I think to many people read to much into swinging, im a single woman who has no intentions of getting into a relationship so i tend not to do regular meets because if you only meet someone once theres no much chance they are going to get attatched to you, thats just my opinion and my way of dealing with swinging, but i do have a sex drive and 1 meet a months not enough for me, so i do meet lots of different guys, i do not feel that means i have no standards tho or that i will fuck anything, because i wont" this is me - i came on looking for regular buddies and got a little greedy - lots of fantastic guys on here, socially and in the bedroom. i had lots of fun and will do again in future. that doesnt make me a slut who'll fuck anyone, it means i'm doing whats right for me. if people wanna judge me cos i have lots of verifications, thats their perogative, but its a sad day when someone decides you'll fuck anyone cos you enjoy sex and lots of it! | |||
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"Do you have a person on site, that if you see their name listed on someone else’s verifications, who has contacted you, you say “I’m not going there” because of the amount of people, the named person has been with in a short space of time, for example over 100 in six months? if i saw a large friends list with loads of versification yes i wouldn't go there also none verifications and long friends list i wouldn't go there Sometimes, yes. It's one thing being "ethusiastic" and another having no real standards. That said, we shouldn't judge. Some people want to fuck anything anything with a hole or a cock, some don't." | |||
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"hey cheeky little devil, don't let it worry you, do whats right for you, theres just as much if not more judging, bitching and back stabbing in the swinging world as there is outwith ![]() Hey i did let it worry me but i don't now. I don't let peoples opinions of me affect my decisions outside the site so I ain't gonna start now thanks hun ![]() | |||
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"hey cheeky little devil, don't let it worry you, do whats right for you, theres just as much if not more judging, bitching and back stabbing in the swinging world as there is outwith ![]() ![]() the thing is people who judge us by whats on our profile, who have never met us, probably arnt going to be the type of people we looking for anyway Im looking for fun, friendly people who i can have a no string relationship with while still maintaining a freindship NOT suck up people who are so wrapped up in themselves that they decide they dont like me because of something that written on the profiles of someone i have met ![]() | |||
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