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"Too much like Hard work, I'm going for a wank" I totally agree | |||
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"Do not start a normal conversation/chat and turn it as sexual as possible in as short a time possible! " I've made the mistake several times of wanting to say 'good morning?' but it's come out as 'good masturbate?' by accident. | |||
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"you are kinda preaching to those guys who are successful..... they are not the ones who are starting the "oh woe is me, i am not getting anywhere posts...." and actually in a unwitting ways.... you are doing two negative things.... 1) you are making it harder for those people who do understand and "get it" so to speak to make them stand out..... 2) you are making it harder for those who are trying to do the picking then trying to differentiate who is genuine and being honest... and those who are saying what you actually just want to hear...... in effect... you just gave someone a tablet and a blow by blow idea of how to fool people........ see....i kinda like the way it is now, because at least this way there are tell tells, and red flags, and ways you can go about picking the people who are suitable for you...... everyone uses that.... what next?" You could use the same argument with any form of education, right? I mean why train new doctors and nurses, that just makes it harder for those already qualified to find jobs doesn't it? Is educating people really giving them the tools to fool people. Or is it, er, educating them on how to conduct themselves so they become better people? Truth is probably somewhere in between ... | |||
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"Do not start a normal conversation/chat and turn it as sexual as possible in as short a time possible! " I would have agreed with you totally a few months ago. Funny thing is, I've found that increasingly a "normal conversation" gets totally ignored - even when it demonstrates that the profile has been read and that you are making an effort to find out more about the other person. Which begs the question, what the heck do people want, lol | |||
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"Do not start a normal conversation/chat and turn it as sexual as possible in as short a time possible! " Some are very good at to take it to sexual chat quickly. Very impressive. I should introduce him and ask for tips | |||
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"A good read. I enjoyed it and would recommend as a user guide for new users when they join up. They should have a tick box to say it's been read Hopefully people will actually take it on board too " Thank you Yes, Fab User's guide was in my mind And I KNOW many won't bother to read...same as profile, haha. | |||
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"It's long but it's a well thought out and well constructed post and I think it's entirely sensible and pretty much spot on. Where I naturally struggle is with the subtle flirting etc, some people are naturals at it whereas for me it's always more of a struggle! When I'm engaged in my limited number of PMs I always find it easier to talk like I would over a social coffee with a mate, as a result I tend to waffle on about everyday things but I guess on this site it's really more about sexy flirts and the like! I get the impression that everyone else is enjoying naughty dirty flirtatious convos and that's a skill I need to master. Any tips anyone? It always feels a little forced to me .. " I understand your frustration... I know few men have similar to you. Probably you need someone can lead you a bit, maybe? Or...di you want to practice with me? | |||
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"Do not start a normal conversation/chat and turn it as sexual as possible in as short a time possible! I've made the mistake several times of wanting to say 'good morning?' but it's come out as 'good masturbate?' by accident. " Was it really “accident“...? I doubt it | |||
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"you are kinda preaching to those guys who are successful..... they are not the ones who are starting the "oh woe is me, i am not getting anywhere posts...." and actually in a unwitting ways.... you are doing two negative things.... 1) you are making it harder for those people who do understand and "get it" so to speak to make them stand out..... 2) you are making it harder for those who are trying to do the picking then trying to differentiate who is genuine and being honest... and those who are saying what you actually just want to hear...... in effect... you just gave someone a tablet and a blow by blow idea of how to fool people........ see....i kinda like the way it is now, because at least this way there are tell tells, and red flags, and ways you can go about picking the people who are suitable for you...... everyone uses that.... what next?" Thanks for your consideration. I've read many posts about “not getting meet“ and its comments. Then thought about create Manual would be fun. In my very personal opinion, non successor never read profile. So, same to Manual. So this post shouldn't be read by them... Am I mean? | |||
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"I agree with what you've posted op, I'd hope people did this anyway. my only reservation in giving it my 's up..... if they follow these tips it's just going to be harder to spot the good from the bad. " Thank you I'll post Tip for “perfect first message“ next then | |||
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"you are kinda preaching to those guys who are successful..... they are not the ones who are starting the "oh woe is me, i am not getting anywhere posts...." and actually in a unwitting ways.... you are doing two negative things.... 1) you are making it harder for those people who do understand and "get it" so to speak to make them stand out..... 2) you are making it harder for those who are trying to do the picking then trying to differentiate who is genuine and being honest... and those who are saying what you actually just want to hear...... in effect... you just gave someone a tablet and a blow by blow idea of how to fool people........ see....i kinda like the way it is now, because at least this way there are tell tells, and red flags, and ways you can go about picking the people who are suitable for you...... everyone uses that.... what next? You could use the same argument with any form of education, right? I mean why train new doctors and nurses, that just makes it harder for those already qualified to find jobs doesn't it? Is educating people really giving them the tools to fool people. Or is it, er, educating them on how to conduct themselves so they become better people? Truth is probably somewhere in between ... " | |||
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"Do not start a normal conversation/chat and turn it as sexual as possible in as short a time possible! I would have agreed with you totally a few months ago. Funny thing is, I've found that increasingly a "normal conversation" gets totally ignored - even when it demonstrates that the profile has been read and that you are making an effort to find out more about the other person. Which begs the question, what the heck do people want, lol" I suppose it all depends who you send messages too, Am not very good at getting my point across on here or in private messages, Thank good some people can see past that and take the time to get to know me personally | |||
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"I think for new people joining it's a good heads up for them." Only if they read...it's same as profile, never be read, haha. | |||
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"It's long but it's a well thought out and well constructed post and I think it's entirely sensible and pretty much spot on. Where I naturally struggle is with the subtle flirting etc, some people are naturals at it whereas for me it's always more of a struggle! When I'm engaged in my limited number of PMs I always find it easier to talk like I would over a social coffee with a mate, as a result I tend to waffle on about everyday things but I guess on this site it's really more about sexy flirts and the like! I get the impression that everyone else is enjoying naughty dirty flirtatious convos and that's a skill I need to master. Any tips anyone? It always feels a little forced to me .. I understand your frustration... I know few men have similar to you. Probably you need someone can lead you a bit, maybe? Or...di you want to practice with me? " Darn, I was going to ask if he wanted to practice on me | |||
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"Nice thread OP, I am not in a hurry for a meet but a good read. its just to much effort. I am happy to just use the forum and chat room " Thanks We all have our own hands and fingers anyway. Quick solution. I do use them | |||
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"It's long but it's a well thought out and well constructed post and I think it's entirely sensible and pretty much spot on. Where I naturally struggle is with the subtle flirting etc, some people are naturals at it whereas for me it's always more of a struggle! When I'm engaged in my limited number of PMs I always find it easier to talk like I would over a social coffee with a mate, as a result I tend to waffle on about everyday things but I guess on this site it's really more about sexy flirts and the like! I get the impression that everyone else is enjoying naughty dirty flirtatious convos and that's a skill I need to master. Any tips anyone? It always feels a little forced to me .. I understand your frustration... I know few men have similar to you. Probably you need someone can lead you a bit, maybe? Or...di you want to practice with me? Darn, I was going to ask if he wanted to practice on me " Ha well I'm very happy to practice with either of you. However I'm you'll soon tire of talking about your favourite chocolate or pets or whatever | |||
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"Do not start a normal conversation/chat and turn it as sexual as possible in as short a time possible! I would have agreed with you totally a few months ago. Funny thing is, I've found that increasingly a "normal conversation" gets totally ignored - even when it demonstrates that the profile has been read and that you are making an effort to find out more about the other person. Which begs the question, what the heck do people want, lol I suppose it all depends who you send messages too, Am not very good at getting my point across on here or in private messages, Thank good some people can see past that and take the time to get to know me personally " Yes, some need time some don't or won't. Finding right audience is the hardest part, how beautifully composed message never work to wrong target... | |||
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" Darn, I was going to ask if he wanted to practice on me " Aww, sorry I might step over the line... Please you two practice until pro level...so I can take over... | |||
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" Darn, I was going to ask if he wanted to practice on me Ha well I'm very happy to practice with either of you. However I'm you'll soon tire of talking about your favourite chocolate or pets or whatever " Lindor. Cat. Bourbon. pizza. | |||
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" Ha well I'm very happy to practice with either of you. However I'm you'll soon tire of talking about your favourite chocolate or pets or whatever " I can talk cars, planes, trains, buildings, travel, my pets, my job can be pretty amusing too | |||
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" Darn, I was going to ask if he wanted to practice on me Ha well I'm very happy to practice with either of you. However I'm you'll soon tire of talking about your favourite chocolate or pets or whatever Lindor. Cat. Bourbon. pizza. " Lindor. Cat. Bourbon. Curry. Have you tried Elijah Craig bourbon from Heaven Hills distillery? lovely | |||
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"you are kinda preaching to those guys who are successful..... they are not the ones who are starting the "oh woe is me, i am not getting anywhere posts...." and actually in a unwitting ways.... you are doing two negative things.... 1) you are making it harder for those people who do understand and "get it" so to speak to make them stand out..... 2) you are making it harder for those who are trying to do the picking then trying to differentiate who is genuine and being honest... and those who are saying what you actually just want to hear...... in effect... you just gave someone a tablet and a blow by blow idea of how to fool people........ see....i kinda like the way it is now, because at least this way there are tell tells, and red flags, and ways you can go about picking the people who are suitable for you...... everyone uses that.... what next?" That's a pretty good point! | |||
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" Lindor. Cat. Bourbon. pizza. Lindor. Cat. Bourbon. Curry. Have you tried Elijah Craig bourbon from Heaven Hills distillery? lovely" Oh my favorite is Maker's Mark. It sealed with red wax and taste sooooooo good But I must try your recommendation! Thank you | |||
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" Oh my favorite is Maker's Mark. It sealed with red wax and taste sooooooo good But I must try your recommendation! Thank you " I have been to the Makers Mark distillery, and seen the bottling and wax dipping. They start the fermentation in 100 year old wooden vats and use a lot of charring on the barrel, their used barrels are sent to Laphroaig for their whisky. Elijah Craig and Evan Williams are much lighter and almost vanilla tones, Heaven Hills are my favourite distillery. Im not an expert but we toured the Bourbon distilleries of Kentucky a few years ago and tasted them all, fabulous | |||
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"A well thought out post with some very good points which will help most of the new guys here if the truly want to improve and not just pop up posts about not getting a meet with a week of being here. Will have to order in some Makers Mark now is that has the desired effect x" You seem to know EXACTLY how to get me interested Mmm, I should put [Reading between the line and beyond] in next manual | |||
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"Bugger! As if I didn't have enough competition in here already! " | |||
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"Tips - How to get a meet or two It's totally my personal biased opinion Objection, suggestion or modification all welcome [Attraction] Face and body pics - show who you really are with confidence. Smile and full physique are always good to see. Aware that your avatar, username also are your “face“ at Fab. [Effort] Indicate your interest by reading profile before message and you need to have something for them to read. It's not enough just say “I've read your profile“ but mentioning something from the profile is good enough. [Intelligence, Attention to the Details] Well composed and carefully chosen words message is not only easy to read but also showing your engaging ability, caring nature and fun to be around. [Humour, Personality] Wit is something well worth having. Subject line is that's for. Avoid offensive language in any case. Sarcasm or skeptical are rarely match to taste. [Manner] If the person wasn't your type by the sound or appearance after initial contact, tell gently as soon as possible to avoid misunderstanding and disappointment. No point hiding and carry on. Honesty is the key. [Communication] Sincere and meaningful message is looking forward to read. Let it flow naturally. Tell them about you, make the person want to tell you about themselves. Be honest, it's no point hiding anything. If you “want“, you might “give“ first. Building trust is main focus. Trust can't be build on false and lies. [Sexy] The balance between general “getting-know-each-other“ and sexy talk is difficult to measure but discuss about both likes and dislikes in bed also knowing each other's sexual tendency are very important for compatibility. It's as well as good foreplay. Enjoy flirting message exchange. Making agreed scenario is fun to discuss, also fun to execute. [Respect] It's all about respect others boundary, limits, situation, likes and dislikes etc. [Push] Sometimes a little push is enough to make thing happening. But it's all about timing. Read the situation. Know the person. Not too be pushy. [Meet up arrangement] Then arrange first social meet (if it is with me ! ) Maybe more...but that's all for now Good luck everyone " fucking hell its meant to be fun and not a clinical procedure | |||
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"Tips - How to get a meet or two It's totally my personal biased opinion Objection, suggestion or modification all welcome [Attraction] Face and body pics - show who you really are with confidence. Smile and full physique are always good to see. Aware that your avatar, username also are your “face“ at Fab. [Effort] Indicate your interest by reading profile before message and you need to have something for them to read. It's not enough just say “I've read your profile“ but mentioning something from the profile is good enough. [Intelligence, Attention to the Details] Well composed and carefully chosen words message is not only easy to read but also showing your engaging ability, caring nature and fun to be around. [Humour, Personality] Wit is something well worth having. Subject line is that's for. Avoid offensive language in any case. Sarcasm or skeptical are rarely match to taste. [Manner] If the person wasn't your type by the sound or appearance after initial contact, tell gently as soon as possible to avoid misunderstanding and disappointment. No point hiding and carry on. Honesty is the key. [Communication] Sincere and meaningful message is looking forward to read. Let it flow naturally. Tell them about you, make the person want to tell you about themselves. Be honest, it's no point hiding anything. If you “want“, you might “give“ first. Building trust is main focus. Trust can't be build on false and lies. [Sexy] The balance between general “getting-know-each-other“ and sexy talk is difficult to measure but discuss about both likes and dislikes in bed also knowing each other's sexual tendency are very important for compatibility. It's as well as good foreplay. Enjoy flirting message exchange. Making agreed scenario is fun to discuss, also fun to execute. [Respect] It's all about respect others boundary, limits, situation, likes and dislikes etc. [Push] Sometimes a little push is enough to make thing happening. But it's all about timing. Read the situation. Know the person. Not too be pushy. [Meet up arrangement] Then arrange first social meet (if it is with me ! ) Maybe more...but that's all for now Good luck everyone " I hereby promise to follow all your advice, so will you meet me now then | |||
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" I have been to the Makers Mark distillery, and seen the bottling and wax dipping. They start the fermentation in 100 year old wooden vats and use a lot of charring on the barrel, their used barrels are sent to Laphroaig for their whisky. Elijah Craig and Evan Williams are much lighter and almost vanilla tones, Heaven Hills are my favourite distillery. Im not an expert but we toured the Bourbon distilleries of Kentucky a few years ago and tasted them all, fabulous " Oh my...sounds marvelous...the thought itself makes me hot in sweet anticipation...the beautiful and excitement view of hot red wax dripping down on the thick bottle neck...oh...makes my mouth watering...I've never tasted that kind of vanilla before...I want to taste them all...onto my tongue till non droplet left...aahh... Dear Pinkcat, thanks very much! I'm really wanting to go to Kentucky now. And I must try your recommendation. I'm not a regular nor heavy drinker but my occasional Bourbon time is something very special xxx My Christmas present sorted xxx | |||
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"Generally great advice. To those naysayers, a wolf in sheep's clothing is still clearly a wolf. If they take on board the advice to be honest then they Will also open themselves up to make it abundantly clear just how they are. Whilst we're busy, most of us will really take the time to establish our greater certainty that others fit the bill. I like to be clear about what I need and where all of us have insufficient compromise then it's clear that it would be a fairly poor match. It can sometimes take a while and potentially on some occasions we need different things, but better to discover this on the days when you're poorly matched than when all sides are too optimistic or misjudge themselves or others' potential. " Thank you I like your expression of “wolf in sheep's clothing“ very much. If they honestly say they are wolf from the beginning, someone like wolf surely happy to take them, that the best mach. Compatibility is the key, isn't it | |||
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" fucking hell its meant to be fun and not a clinical procedure " I know... I really had fun writing this...a bit of overexcitement I must admit | |||
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" I hereby promise to follow all your advice, so will you meet me now then " You seem read this post correctly At least it works for me Alas, you are tad far from me | |||
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"I've followed this approach and failed many times " Whhhhyy, you look super cute, girls must need queue up to meet you! Please add me on your queue | |||
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" I hereby promise to follow all your advice, so will you meet me now then You seem read this post correctly At least it works for me Alas, you are tad far from me " I'm not as far as hull, how's about I come to you then | |||
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"you are kinda preaching to those guys who are successful..... they are not the ones who are starting the "oh woe is me, i am not getting anywhere posts...." and actually in a unwitting ways.... you are doing two negative things.... 1) you are making it harder for those people who do understand and "get it" so to speak to make them stand out..... 2) you are making it harder for those who are trying to do the picking then trying to differentiate who is genuine and being honest... and those who are saying what you actually just want to hear...... in effect... you just gave someone a tablet and a blow by blow idea of how to fool people........ see....i kinda like the way it is now, because at least this way there are tell tells, and red flags, and ways you can go about picking the people who are suitable for you...... everyone uses that.... what next?" I agree with this. It's good at the moment because you can filter people who message 'up for fun now babez???' or 'my cock is hard, want it?' etc etc. If they are they kind of person I want to know about it before I meet, not have them show up and be something I totally wasn't expecting. | |||
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".....and a blow by blow idea of how to fool people........" That's a very good point, however whilst I think it may get the individual to a social I think that in person it's pretty easy to filter out those who's real personalities don't match their projected image. I would also agree that whilst a little wordy the information was sound advice. | |||
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" I'm not as far as hull, how's about I come to you then " !!! (A bit of embarrassment) | |||
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"I even put a few tips on my profile" Single guys, bit of advice... don't hassle anyone, never hassle for a meet, actually make a conversation and you'll get to meet the elite people Agree. Elite people! Elite swinger !! | |||
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" I agree with this. It's good at the moment because you can filter people who message 'up for fun now babez???' or 'my cock is hard, want it?' etc etc. If they are they kind of person I want to know about it before I meet, not have them show up and be something I totally wasn't expecting." I personally prefer knowing person well before arrange any meet. This is one way. Follow hunch and do instant meet is another way. We all have some method of own | |||
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"you are kinda preaching to those guys who are successful..... they are not the ones who are starting the "oh woe is me, i am not getting anywhere posts...." and actually in a unwitting ways.... you are doing two negative things.... 1) you are making it harder for those people who do understand and "get it" so to speak to make them stand out..... 2) you are making it harder for those who are trying to do the picking then trying to differentiate who is genuine and being honest... and those who are saying what you actually just want to hear...... in effect... you just gave someone a tablet and a blow by blow idea of how to fool people........ see....i kinda like the way it is now, because at least this way there are tell tells, and red flags, and ways you can go about picking the people who are suitable for you...... everyone uses that.... what next? You could use the same argument with any form of education, right? I mean why train new doctors and nurses, that just makes it harder for those already qualified to find jobs doesn't it? Is educating people really giving them the tools to fool people. Or is it, er, educating them on how to conduct themselves so they become better people? Truth is probably somewhere in between ... " I agree. It sounds mean-spirited to withhold advice and help, and I would strongly support having this kind of advice manual as a "sticky" post permanently on display in at least one of the message boards here in the forum, so that many may then refer to it, and I hope we would then see fewer woe is me, it's not fair threads posted. Those that do continue to post could in any case be directed to such a manual, but I suspect a good many post griping moaning messages just to attract attention, and aren't interested in advice.. | |||
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" I'm not as far as hull, how's about I come to you then !!! (A bit of embarrassment) " I was joking, you had to be there I suppose | |||
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".....and a blow by blow idea of how to fool people........ That's a very good point, however whilst I think it may get the individual to a social I think that in person it's pretty easy to filter out those who's real personalities don't match their projected image. I would also agree that whilst a little wordy the information was sound advice." I'm not sure long chatting is the best way to find out for compatibility, but it works for me due to short of free time. I do agree that actual meet up is the quick way to “feel the vibe“ (err...not literary ). | |||
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"Ok while I agree that it's a well thought out post and some of the advice is very useful.... A well structured message can only take you so far. Single guys need that little bit extra if they are to be successful on here, due to the high numbers. Or like someone mentioned earlier..... Go to a club " I'm fully aware that some don't like writing or reading, not be able to express themselves in writing. Not fair, I know | |||
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" I'm not as far as hull, how's about I come to you then !!! (A bit of embarrassment) I was joking, you had to be there I suppose " Errrrr...... You know my secret... | |||
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"Nope. Doesn't always work. Or it could be just my face. " I know this is not for everyone, but at least work for one Finding the one is the hard part... | |||
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