FabSwingers.com forum: banned

By *mcouple1 OP Couple
over a year ago

nr warrington

we posted a review about a club and tbh it was a bit critical because it wasn the best night . then we got banned from there wtf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some clubs cant take criticism lol xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you were justified then they should have made their apologies and corrected the faults or explained, if you were not justified then they are quite right. If others agree with you they should all post the same criticism and then they would have no one going at all!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we posted a review about a club and tbh it was a bit critical because it wasn the best night . then we got banned from there wtf"

If I owned a club and someone did something damaging toward my business I might take the same action.

I'd like to think I'd be different but who knows.

If the customer didn't point out problems to me at the time and give me a chance to put things right I might be pissed off that they went public first.

Can't really comment as I don't know what you said or how you said it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Club owners invest a lot of their own money in these places and can get a bit peeved if their efforts are slagged off on sites like these where the lifeblood of the club - the swingers who visit it - are most likely to read your reviews. Did you not think that someone from the club also reads these reviews? Didn't you realise that in your eagerness to castigate the club that they would also have recourse to bar you from attending in future?

If you had a bad experience on one night but intended to go back another time then you certainly didn't do yourself any favours by criticising the club so publicly, whereas a simple email to the club in private may have yielded far better results - like an apology and free entry on your next visit.

If you had no intention of ever going there again then why post such a negative review of the place - one person's elixir is another person's poison etc. and maybe you should have simply stated why you had a bad night and toned down the criticism of the club overall.

I think they had every right to ban you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where did you post the review ?

Was it on the clubs own feedback forum on their website or was it on another site ?

If the club have their own feedback forum then they should accept all feedback good or bad, however if you've gone someplace else to vent your spleen without first contacting the club then I'm afraid that you've been the author of your own misfortune.

Perhaps you'll enlighten us with the details WITHOUT naming the club of course

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with other posters, however, that's only one route considered.

Personally if I was the club owner, I would want to know what exactly was the problem and if it was something I (the club) could change for the better then I would seriously look into it, in this case I would also offer you free entry one time.

However, if I felt there was little I could do about it then I would also contact you to find out the route of the problem, and maybe go the same route of offering you a free visit. or maybe not, depending on your reasoning for bad review.

To spit out your dummy as a club owner is a little weak and not clever business minded, IMO.

However, I don't know the full story but is it possible you could have handled things a little better?

Could you have spoke to or contacted the owners first with your complaint?

In the hope that they would resolve the problem.

Did you do a review straight away or wait a couple of days, always best waiting a couple of days so you post honestly rather than with passion.

With all due respect, you must have considered that the club may have took this route, not everyone takes criticism well at all, if you had a bad verification would you meet those that left you that veri again? problem is it's easier for you to hide that bad veri than a club to hide a bad review.

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By *ansue35Couple
over a year ago

yorkshire

This has happened before a few times. One club i can think of, where anyone giving a bad review gets banned.

When t his is happened the couple just wrote another review on the club section on here pointing out they ot banned. Which i think what you should do.

Ian and Sue

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This has happened before a few times. One club i can think of, where anyone giving a bad review gets banned.

When t his is happened the couple just wrote another review on the club section on here pointing out they ot banned. Which i think what you should do.

Ian and Sue"

Exactly why the club may have been better talking a different route, depending on the complaint and whether or not it's considered remotely justified.

If the club tried offered another chance for free they may then get a better review.

However, one would have to be clever how it was dealt with, wouldn't want complaints just so they get a free invite.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i would actually try to rectify things as the club owner in the hope that the person writing the critique would go on to post something positive on the forum.

banning you is not going to convince you to remove your earlier comment

but agree with a previous poster, should have approached the club first.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

If i go somewhere and dont enjoy myself for whatever easons, why on earth should i contact the club/where ever and spend my time on telling them what was wrong, they should listen to the negative feedback and make changes accordingly. If they cant take critismn then maybe they shouldnt have a feedback section. Sounds a bit pathetic that a club cant take a bit of negative response.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If i go somewhere and dont enjoy myself for whatever easons, why on earth should i contact the club/where ever and spend my time on telling them what was wrong, they should listen to the negative feedback and make changes accordingly. If they cant take critismn then maybe they shouldnt have a feedback section. Sounds a bit pathetic that a club cant take a bit of negative response. "

My thoughts exactly!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I am unhappy about something, I would either do something about it there and then, or grin and bear it and walk away never to return.

Not saying anything there and then, but to post negative comments in an open forum afterwards constitute towards cowardly behaviour IMHO!

One of my favourite campsites states clearly that if anyone has any problem, ring them on their mobile phone regardless of what time of the day, so that it can be delt with speedily. No point telling them afterwards when the evidence is lost etc...

Good job they live on site!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My thoughts exactly!"

somebody has asked if it was on the club sites feedback section or another forum. it hasnt been answered yet.

would also be interested to hear if they were disappointed by the facilities or the clientele...cant blame the club for the latter surely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are quite a few clubs out there and most of them meet the clientels requirements I am biased because I dont think you will find a better run more friendlier club than chams. I have visited a few over the year but always compare it to chams. Did'nt like the retro club at all. Ab fabs is very good enjoy the swimming pool and wet area. And only a few weeks ago cupids was knocked on here we all have different opinions. And if a club has a bad review its surely up to the club to work on that not to loose customers. But then if you've had a bad time why let it bother you move on and find another club.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just the same as bad restaurants you use

of you wasn't happy move on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think it would be helpful if the OPs came back and told us where they'd posted their negative review.

It would then be a lot easier to make considered comments!

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By *he BananamanMan
over a year ago

WORCESTERSHIRE

a few months ago a lady posted a bad report about the problem she had in gaining attention due to a broken bell at the club entrance and did get a bit of a slagging from a club employee on here,but later on a club official did come on here to apologise and sort things out with her,a bit of diplomacy and dialogue goes a long way.

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

A couple of years ago we posted a quite damming review of a club that was not a point of view but a fact based review.

The club contacted the swingers site we posted it on and asked them to remove it (site refused) the club then contacted us with threats of taking us to court as they said we had made it all up. We responded that we would welcome them taking us to court and provided them with the evidence we had.

Within 5 days we recieved a cheque for a couple of hundred pounds and a letter saying sorry.

We the club still exists although it now has different owners.

Dont know if they barred us but to be honest we would not want to go back.

Steve

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So using that anaolgy, if I rewire your house and you ain't happy with the job that I've done, would you complain to me or go straight to trading standards ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is a difficult one without knowing the nature of the complaint

Have to say I support most views that it works like a bad meal at a restaurantor a faulty product from a shop, common decency and your aggrieved rights say the club should be given the right to do something about the problem to your satisfaction.

There are very few businesses that get it right 100% of the time, it can be a lack of care or knowledge or it can be a genuine error, we, commenting here know niether the greivance nor the circumstances.

If someone didn't give me a chance to rectify the problem at the time and make amends or even put forward an explanation I think I would rather that person never used my business again as is thier right.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If any one or any club opens themselves up to be reviewed then they should take any negative comments as well as positive comments or what is the point in having a review section?

As adults, I'm sure we would read all the reviews and if a high percentage were good then that would out weigh the bad ones. Would also show that the contributions to the review section is fair and a broad spectrum of opinion.

Now, would we take all the positive reviews with a pinch of salt as people will be reluctant to leave negative reviews?

I'm sure the club in question encourage people to leave reviews when people have had a good experience but it's hardly fair when people can't use their democratic right to voice their opinion when it's not in the clubs best interest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is often said in these forums that people are expressing an opinion, and that they should be allowed to do so.

I would respectfully suggest that there is a difference between making a complaint and posting a review. A review is simply expressing an opinion, and surely that should be allowed. With regard to a business, in this case a club, surely the management should be mature enough to accept that not everybody is going to like what they are doing/providing. We still haven't heard from the OPs as to whether this review they posted was on a club's own website review section or in the clubs section on here maybe.

Not so very long ago, a lady posted a negative review on the clubs section on here, and her review was removed, and an arguement ensued with a mod who was defending the action of removing this lady's negative comments.

That is surely censorship, and what on earth is the point of having a review section if a person's negative comments are removed/disallowed. It simply makes a mockery of the whole system!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I run a bar not a club but I would like to think if there are problems that the customer would come to me and say and give me the chance not only to say sorry but to put things right.

I would not ban them or refuse them service but would get them back and have a chat with them then put things right where I can.

I do think you should have gone to the owner you will find most are more than happy to make things better its our life blood

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Iam afraid as a previous posting has stated if owners of clubs allow their clubs to be reviewed online or wherever then they have to take the rough with the smooth. I allways go on sites like tripadvisor when booking hotels , restaraunts etc and allthough you get the odd malicious review the best places usually have good reviews. To ban someobody for a bad review is on over the top reaction

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

as others have said it is an awkward one...

positive feedback lets you know you are doing something right, however negative feeback is what you truely tend to learn and improve yourself from.....

yes it is someones business, but so long as any criticism is constructive as opposed to vendictive then I don't see an issue with it.....

otherwise what we end up with is sometime the same as verfications, it what case you see all good, no bad and a system screwed too far......

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Dont know if they barred us but to be honest we would not want to go back.

Exactly. How do you find out you're barred? By turning up at a place you already know you don't like.

Maybe they have a really bad masochism room...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So using that anaolgy, if I rewire your house and you ain't happy with the job that I've done, would you complain to me or go straight to trading standards ?"

Perhaps a bad analogy as I would go straight to the trading standards as a potentially leathal situation could exist and that needs stopping.

We have had this exact same hting (with wiring), and the trading standards DID want to know!

With regards to the club, just banning a couple without finding more about the 'problems' is (IMHO) petty and unprofessional.

I was the helpdesk manager for a very large company and you always found out more about the problem and try to resolve it amicably. That does not mean just 'bowing down to the complaint'. It means seeing if there IS something wrong and if so correcting it.

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By *irtyduoCouple
over a year ago

nr stirling

if a club has a review page, then take the good with the bad simples....

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By *mcouple1 OP Couple
over a year ago

nr warrington

we removed the review from the club section on here x tbh couldn be bothered with the owners of the club calling us liars and askin us to remove it so just took it off and guess what xxxxxx no more messages from them but we r still banned x and a further note the things we put on our review have now been improved at the club x

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"as others have said it is an awkward one...

positive feedback lets you know you are doing something right, however negative feeback is what you truely tend to learn and improve yourself from.....

yes it is someones business, but so long as any criticism is constructive as opposed to vendictive then I don't see an issue with it.....

otherwise what we end up with is sometime the same as verfications, it what case you see all good, no bad and a system screwed too far......"

think _abio makes a good point (as always

)

so long as the review was worded constructively then the owners should take it onboard and look at the areas you were not happy with and maybe address them. you need to use the 'shit sandwich' style of appraisal writing - good comment, improvement area, good comment

that being said the owners of the club seem to have behaved childishly, not everyone is going to rave about your place, that is business and you need to be able to take that on the chin

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"It is often said in these forums that people are expressing an opinion, and that they should be allowed to do so.

That is surely censorship, and what on earth is the point of having a review section if a person's negative comments are removed/disallowed. It simply makes a mockery of the whole system!"

You are way out of line with your comments and what you say is a lie.

When anyone posts a review in the club section , mods CANNOT take them off. The only people who can take them off is Admin..but they don't remove club reviews wether positive or negative.

If a club complains about a review they have to go through Admin , and I or any other mods don't know what happens then, so don't you be posting lies on an open forum about mods arguing with anyone about their right to take a club review off.....as a mod can't do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its not very good that you cant tell the truth ,,,,,, I know we are all diffrent and cant all like same thing ,, but good and bad and i hope people would still go and make there own minds up not just read what others say ... its people that make clubs ... and even the best clubs have bad nights now and again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well i dunno, if i invited someone to my home and after they went round telling everyone bad things about it i dont think id invite them back lol

What i want to know is if the night was so bad why did you go back in order to find out you was banned?

If i went to a club i disliked to the point i left them a bad review i wouldnt be going back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well i think its good for clubs to have feed back from people that go,

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By *mcouple1 OP Couple
over a year ago

nr warrington

didn,t go back just got mail saying we r banned x ahh well never mind x

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By *drianukMan
over a year ago

Spain, Lancs

Ridiculous. It's a free world. You shouldn't have had to 'discuss' it with the owners or anything like that before you posted. You should just be free to speak out. Simple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I disagree!

I believe it is common courtesy to inform the recipent of potential bad reviews that he/she is about to get some for whatever reasons, to allow him/her to take action to address the issues.

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By *ansue35Couple
over a year ago

yorkshire

Shame you felt you had to remove the review. So guess its not worth you writing any more then !

Ian

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ridiculous. It's a free world. You shouldn't have had to 'discuss' it with the owners or anything like that before you posted. You should just be free to speak out. Simple"

It isn't as free as you think it is. With freedom of expression comes the obligation to use it wisely or else see it removed entirely. The club has a right to address the concerns of the visitor who had a bad experience so that it could a) ensure that the couple in question were satisfied that they'd been taken seriously, and b) ensure that nobody else suffered the same experience further down the line.

Complaining about a facility to anyone other than the owner isn't going to endear them to the proprietor, but maybe a wiser solution would have been to invite them back and discuss their concerns face-to-face.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a shame the reveiw was removed. It would have been better if it had been left as long as it was a contructive and well worded review.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a shame the reveiw was removed. It would have been better if it had been left as long as it was a contructive and well worded review. "
I look at it this way its a reveiw of a club ,,,,,, If you cant say good and bad things and say the truth whats it there for just to make club look good .... having feed-back is good as it keeps standeds high . I know as i have holday homes around Norfolk and have feed back from people that stay ,, so i make sure its Right ,,, you cant let things slip if people paying good money and that go for clubs ... I have been to lots of swing clubs over years and have to say most are ok but people make clubs really and staff and having the place nice a clean ,, jo xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That is surely censorship, and what on earth is the point of having a review section if a person's negative comments are removed/disallowed. It simply makes a mockery of the whole system!

You are way out of line with your comments and what you say is a lie......so don't you be posting lies on an open forum about mods arguing with anyone about their right to take a club review off.....as a mod can't do it."
. Just been told about this thread. Have read the contentious post and don't see where it says the complaint was about the MOD taking off the review.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And just for the record, it was my review that was removed from the club section. While I don't particularly want my posting history to be used to make a point be anyone else, I had good reason to suspect there. Were security issues with the site but after a 'discussion' with a mod and admin, those were discounted. I subsequently posted another word for word review, which stands, and had a host of fairly abusive messages left by regulars in the Review section. I see someone else has added an even more damming review there than mine and much the same happened to them. So, maybe the qustion should be, what's the point of Club reviews?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

scothisheather i think like you whats it there for if you cant say truth..... will put people of reading them knowing this is going on ,,

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By *ngieandMrManCouple
over a year ago

hereford

In general with a lot of business’s they seem to have an attitude of ‘If you don’t like it fuck off’ its as simple as that. Be it network providers, retail outlets etc. ‘The customer is always right’ is very much a thing of the past.

Its simple maths, if 1 in a 100 complains just get rid of them, in the long term it will not adversely effect the business profits, however fixing the problem could have very expensive ramifications.

I took on a company who were using misleading advertising. I pointed out the fact and said, “It’s perfectly simple, give me my £10 back and I’ll walk away” They refused to refund me and I never got my tenner back but I did stick to my guns and went to trading standards and the company had to change their advertising… how many multiple £1000’s did that cost them?

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By *rummiePartyManMan
over a year ago

birmingham

In certain parts of the country there is a lot of competition for the swinging "market" with a lot of clubs, especially in the Greater Manchester and West Midlands areas "competing" for their slice of the swinging cake.

You can understand club owners being paranoid over negative views being inspired or encouraged by "the competition", whether this is the truth of the matter or not. That said, there are probably just as many club owners who get their "pet punters" to fill review columns with glowing reports as well so who knows who to believe with these reviews?

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By *ilthythanetCouple
over a year ago

ramsgate

If the club was that bad, why did you want to go back?

Nothing wrong with given honest feedback, but being brutally honest can backfire.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

statement: i don't like your place

response: then don't come back

nothing wrong with that at all

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Well having followed this post for quite a while now and also been lucky enough to have read the original review i would say your post was very objective and very provable indeed. i note quite a few people seem to have the same view.

If the owner feels you have wronged him with your comments it would be very easy for him to prove you wrong but i doubt very much he will take up the opotunity to do so.

Steve

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Well having followed this post for quite a while now and also been lucky enough to have read the original review i would say your post was very objective and very provable indeed. i note quite a few people seem to have the same view.

If the owner feels you have wronged him with your comments it would be very easy for him to prove you wrong but i doubt very much he will take up the opotunity to do so.

Steve

if that is the case and i have no reason not to believe you at all.... then if it was taken down at someones request, then it means that the club reviews are in effect no better than varifications... in the sense that the good ones are put up and the bad ones are never known about!

whats the point of them if any bad ones are taken down?

as long as people are constructive about the criticisms rather than vendictive then what is wrong with bad reviews?

it is a persons business but i'd rather know the truth about a place and then make up my own mind... rather then be lied to....

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I am not sure the OP said their review was taken down?

But if you look at the club reviews, there are lots of "avoid " reviews as well as favourable.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"I am not sure the OP said their review was taken down?

But if you look at the club reviews, there are lots of "avoid " reviews as well as favourable.

Ah sorry, rewind on that, they took it down themselves.

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By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago

east cheshire

"I am not sure the OP said their review was taken down?

But if you look at the club reviews, there are lots of "avoid " reviews as well as favourable.

Ah sorry, rewind on that, they took it down themselves."

You losing the plot again honey?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

lol sometimes these threads all merge into one

Plus I was knackered so went to bed

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