FabSwingers.com forum: What's your view on affairs?

By *rs Tooty OP Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

Do you think if people are willing to cheat that they are truly happy in their relationship?

Are they kidding themselves if they profess its just about sex as They 'don't get enough at home'?

Who do you think is to blame.. The married person or the 'other wo/man'

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Without knowing the story of the individual case it's hard to point the finger of blame.

I imagine affairs happen for all manner of reasons besides lack of sex, some want more sex, others want a friend to listen in a way the husband/wife doesn't, companionship......I guess the list could go on

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *anchestercubMan
over a year ago

manchester & NI

I think attitudes towards marriage have changed so much.

Something that I have noticed though through friends and friends of my parents is that often a woman will leave a marriage if she's unhappy and wants a different life.

But often times a man will wait until he meets someone to leave the marriage for before leaving.

I know that's not always the case, and I'm not stereotyping, but from the people I know that's the case a lot of the time (but not always of course).

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rs Tooty OP Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I find that interesting.. On another post I read the op was abused as she had fallen out with her FB. They were both married and the op was upset.

Made me wonder on people's _iews..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eforfuncplCouple
over a year ago

Morecambe

Why bother having an affair if your on here ?? Unless of course your bored shitless in a shit marriage an on as a cheating single ?

Oh well we all different but if that bored think I'd be single x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that these things are never black and white, but people are so quick to judge where they know nothing of the circumstances. Relationships are complicated and nobody is perfect.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Both are to blame if both know the other is married/committed and hide it from their partner.

But, there is a lot of pressure from society to be monogamous and not so much to marry I guess but still a lot of families and communities would pressure for marriage and commitment.

Personally I don't want any involvement with committed people, I like mature guys who know what they want and aren't afraid to go for it. Don't want anyone so immature they have to lie about their life and live a lie rather than take what they want from it. These kind of people are holding back society and the human race, we should be in control of our own lives and nobody else.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rs Tooty OP Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

"Both are to blame if both know the other is married/committed and hide it from their partner.

But, there is a lot of pressure from society to be monogamous and not so much to marry I guess but still a lot of families and communities would pressure for marriage and commitment.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

It is upto them what they do, if they just got on with it and didn't invite people to comment.

It always goes tits up when married people who are playing away ask for people's opinions, ask them to justify why they don't play with them and so on.

of course, it does differ if the person asking has a vagina between their legs opposed to a cock and a set of balls.....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

life is complicated, relationships are complicated and I never comment unless invited to do so. If a person chooses to disrespect their absent partner by tacitly blaming them or discussing them openly then I feel entitled to comment otherwise I have seen enough of life to know that nothing is ever what it seems and as long as I'm not expected to be involved every one must do what they need to do.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It is upto them what they do, if they just got on with it and didn't invite people to comment.

It always goes tits up when married people who are playing away ask for people's opinions, ask them to justify why they don't play with them and so on.

of course, it does differ if the person asking has a vagina between their legs opposed to a cock and a set of balls....."

That's only because there is that many single men On here desperate for a fuck.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every case is an individual one with valid reasons, greed, lust or even boredom driving them so its impossible to give a blanket call on cheating/adultery or what ever you wish to call it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ohnjones3210Man
over a year ago

Chester

Its a difficult question as no two people are the same.

My guesses as to why people would have an affair is that they are no longer in love with their other half or their other half does not pay attention to them PR show any interest in them.... Or the other half doesn't give the person what they need whereas the new person does.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/10/14 10:47:38]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you think if people are willing to cheat that they are truly happy in their relationship?

There are plenty of 'unhappily' married men who talk crap as well.

Most of them are still fucking their wives and happy in their relationship. My best mate has just dumped her husband for cheating on her, they were still having sex and had a very fun, happy relationship. She's really upset now and her confidence has taken a huge knock.

Some guys (and girls) just want their cake and eat it. Which is fine if both of the couple are happy with this, but she wasn't and he knew this so hid it from her.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Generally a bad thing and something I would never do.

But, that said, life is complex and without knowing a persons backstory it's not always that clear cut.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People have affairs for all sorts of reasons, none of which are my business, they can do as they please.

I only object if they start seeking sympathy if they've been caught.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/11/14 07:45:36]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People have affairs for all sorts of reasons, none of which are my business, they can do as they please.

I only object if they start seeking sympathy if they've been caught."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People have affairs for all sorts of reasons, none of which are my business, they can do as they please.

I only object if they start seeking sympathy if they've been caught.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Funny how it's again guys who are mentioned !! There are plenty of married women on here too but yawn let's forget that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

they are kidding themselves realy, its not a very good marriage, they should get a divorce. men often say they aren't getting any at home, most of the time its an excuse because they want to screw around.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

Some people have bad marriages and just aren't brave enough to leave so they seek solace in other places, other people do indeed want to eat their cake and everyone else's cake, informed choice is always a good thing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

"life is complicated, relationships are complicated and I never comment unless invited to do so. If a person chooses to disrespect their absent partner by tacitly blaming them or discussing them openly then I feel entitled to comment otherwise I have seen enough of life to know that nothing is ever what it seems and as long as I'm not expected to be involved every one must do what they need to do. "

as ever, well said..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only two people who really knows what goes on in a marriage are the married partners. Altho I have never had an "affair" I have known both men and women who have sought solace outside their marriage and it does not always have to be about sex. None of us is in a position to judge others choices since we are not in full possession of the facts.

That said I do not condone those who come on here and blatantly deride their partners and use that as an excuse for being here. As View says, go about your business quietly if you must, there is no need to draw attention to what you do.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

my _iew of affairs............ bad!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

Who do you think is to blame.. The married person or the 'other wo/man'"

The person in the relationship every time.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I see no wrong with it, and yes funnie how men are always mention here, the reason the WOMAN cheats could be for many reason, but mostly as he cant satisfy her in bed, so she is looking for younger fitter new meat to fuck - this

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *SweetVioletxWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Just grow a pair and leave. Life's complicated for everyone - so what you're married - deal with it. Nothing I hate more than people who complain about their situation but don't make a move to change it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I see no wrong with it, and yes funnie how men are always mention here, the reason the WOMAN cheats could be for many reason, but mostly as he cant satisfy her in bed, so she is looking for younger fitter new meat to fuck - this

Really ???????

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been the other woman and it's not something i'm proud of ...

The guilt I would feel due to being partially responsible for a marriage break down isn't something I want .....

jog on married cheaters go to councilling in or keep it in your pants !!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

shag at times you are a funny guy but with posts like this you exhibit a delusional and naïve side with little understanding of the issue's that some have within their relationships..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *obbytupperMan
over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

I must admit to having been a serial cheat in two relationships. After paying the price (2 houses,3 cars) I realised the error of my ways and have been happily single for the last 16 years.

The internet and swinging have been my saviour.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just grow a pair and leave. Life's complicated for everyone - so what you're married - deal with it. Nothing I hate more than people who complain about their situation but don't make a move to change it. "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

shag at times you are a funny guy but with posts like this you exhibit a delusional and naïve side with little understanding of the issue's that some have within their relationships..

"
lol I know, was trying to make it abit funnie you as with most married threads it tends to gear towards the man x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

once the sex goes out of a marriage for ever what reason.. then the marriage is doomed I think..? either one or both partners are going to look for sex elswere..? its not nice for anyone who has had a broken heart because of a partners love/fuck buddy affair..but sexual needs need to be met by most people..tis why I like sites like fab..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inkxRabbitWoman
over a year ago

Mostly in GU24

"once the sex goes out of a marriage for ever what reason.. then the marriage is doomed I think..? either one or both partners are going to look for sex elsewhere..? its not nice for anyone who has had a broken heart because of a partners love/fuck buddy affair..but sexual needs need to be met by most people..tis why I like sites like fab..

I'd be in deep depression without my fab friend.

I particularly meet married men on here because, and only because, they have as much to lose as I do. I don't want to wreck any marriages, that's not what I'm about.

We all have sexual and emotional needs. If these are not being met it takes a lot of courage to look elsewhere, especially if you've never even contemplated extramarital sex.

I'm happy for the first time in my life. I wash my husband's clothes and all wife things, we share a bed but are like like brother and sister.

He had never, in 25 years, noticed when I was happy or sad, shouted at me for getting upset or emotional. Until recently was 6 stone overweight and suffering from clinical depression.

Our marriage is happier now than it8s ever been. I've lost 3 stone, I'm happy and have a spring in my step, tons more confidence and I'm so much stronger than I've ever been.

For the first time I'm in control of my life asks I feel fantastic.

Now who thinks it's a bad thing?

My husband knows what I do and why. He chose to keep me, it's not changed anything at home and I'm very grateful for that. What is sad though is that he makes no effort to find out what is about. He'd be a much happier man if he joined in!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

shag at times you are a funny guy but with posts like this you exhibit a delusional and naïve side with little understanding of the issue's that some have within their relationships..

lol I know, was trying to make it abit funnie you as with most married threads it tends to gear towards the man x"
I typed wrong meant.....

"lol I know, was trying to make it abit more funnie and as you know as with most married threads its geared to the men"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have not long since come out of a relationship that I was in for 2 n half year. I started to fall out of love with her but cracked on regardless for a couple of months thinking that it was just a phase and that things would get better.. A few months past and they didn't get better and I was feeling very un happy and stuck in a rut for want of a better word. One day I thought to my self you know what I would rather be alone than un happy and I knew that I just had to leave her.. I did and she didn't take it very well but as I say I would rather be alone than unhappy and I was not....... I cant speak for any one else or any other situation but I personally never cheated on my former partner, nor she me. I chose to leave rather than be stuck in a relationship that I didn't want to be in.... I imagine that many people stick at something for the sake of it and then perhaps that is how affairs may start.... Not always for the sex either I would imagine.... Anyhow I didn't want to go down any of those routes so I personally chose to end things a I think that it was the best thing to do for both of us in the long run....... And now I am back on FAB and looking to have some NSA fun..... I am staying single forever now I think

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/11/14 14:59:00]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *onestjohn1962Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

I'd be in deep depression without my fab friend.

I particularly meet married men on here because, and only because, they have as much to lose as I do. I don't want to wreck any marriages, that's not what I'm about.

We all have sexual and emotional needs. If these are not being met it takes a lot of courage to look elsewhere, especially if you've never even contemplated extramarital sex.

I'm happy for the first time in my life. I wash my husband's clothes and all wife things, we share a bed but are like like brother and sister.

He had never, in 25 years, noticed when I was happy or sad, shouted at me for getting upset or emotional. Until recently was 6 stone overweight and suffering from clinical depression.

Our marriage is happier now than it8s ever been. I've lost 3 stone, I'm happy and have a spring in my step, tons more confidence and I'm so much stronger than I've ever been.

For the first time I'm in control of my life asks I feel fantastic.

Now who thinks it's a bad thing?

Good for you !!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plenty of happily married people have affairs. The person who instigates the affair is to blame, and so is anyone having one with the knowledge that a person is married.

I think it's fine to have one, but you're gonna break someones heart by having relationships based on lies. And not just affairs are based on lies either.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The only two people who really knows what goes on in a marriage are the married partners. Altho I have never had an "affair" I have known both men and women who have sought solace outside their marriage and it does not always have to be about sex. None of us is in a position to judge others choices since we are not in full possession of the facts.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread