FabSwingers.com forum: Hassle

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Unfortunately yesterday afternoon I was involved in a car crash. I had a meet arranged for today but due to the fact i was otherwise engaged (strapped to a spinal board) I forgot to contact the person yesterday evening. Got a text late last night from guy and replied i had to cancel and explained why. I then got the third degree what hospital i was in could he come and visit me. then a tirade about am i getting cold feet and putting him off. For god sake sometimes shit happens and you just have to accept it. I dont explain myself to my parents so why should i explain myself to a stranger. Would you let a stranger come and visit you in hospital. I dont think so. Well he certainly put me off now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have to do what feels right for you hun......don't be pushed shoved and pestered into doing anything which you are not comfortable with. If this guy is really interested in you he will have the decency to wait until you are back on top form xx

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By *unterslickCouple
over a year ago

tullamore

just dont reply,,,we wouldnt family/your health first,

hope your ok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He probably thought you were taking the piss and making up an excuse but unfortunately things like this to sometimes actually happen. Hope your ok xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unfortunately yesterday afternoon I was involved in a car crash. I had a meet arranged for today but due to the fact i was otherwise engaged (strapped to a spinal board) I forgot to contact the person yesterday evening. Got a text late last night from guy and replied i had to cancel and explained why. I then got the third degree what hospital i was in could he come and visit me. then a tirade about am i getting cold feet and putting him off. For god sake sometimes shit happens and you just have to accept it. I dont explain myself to my parents so why should i explain myself to a stranger. Would you let a stranger come and visit you in hospital. I dont think so. Well he certainly put me off now.

lol..he sounds blooming CRAZY..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You do have to admit though, it could easily have been made up.

Of course that doesn't give anyone the right to give you hassle, but people do make things up.

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Hunny, your health is paramount and yes he may have thought it was a cold feet situation or got a better offer.

As long as you know unfortunately you did end up flat on your back in the worst way rather than the nicer form, then if he doesnt believe you then dont worry.

If you mum didnt believe you and thought you were lying to get out of doing something then that is a different matter but friends wont do that.

This person clearly isnt a friend yet so concentrate on yourself, and recovery. xx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

You can understand why sometimes people don't believe a reason of why they were stood up, especially when they don't get any word , or very late notification from the people you are meeting.....as it is littered all over the forums about people alledgedly doing the very same thing.

But no, if something had happened like that to us, we wouldn't invite the stranger to come and make sure we are telling the truth, if they don't believe us, tough.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

PS, don't forget he is a member on here, so please keep this clean.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You do have to admit though, it could easily have been made up.

Of course that doesn't give anyone the right to give you hassle, but people do make things up."

Maybe for some sick people it might have been but it never even occured to me that i would be questioned. believe me i would have much preferred to be having a meet today that laid up with concussion and whiplash.

And i am feeling a bit sore but will be better in a week or so probably. He wont get a look in though.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

i used to get so affected when someone questioned my reasons for cancelling a meet- worried i would be labelled a dreaded 'time waster'

but at the end of the day the only person you have to answer to is yourself - so long as you know (and i'm pretty sure you did!) that the reason is genuine then thats all that matters

if they cant cope with that then tough, block and move on

p.s. hope you are feeling ok after the car crash xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

blocked and moved on. just needed to get it off my chest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The OP was doing well until he said "would you let a stranger visit you in hospital".

This being Fabswingers we presume that you were meeting to see if you were compatible for sex ?

So what is the difference between meeting a stranger for sex and a stranger visiting you in hospital to wish you well and perhaps offer some comfort ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and sorry for referring to you as "he" my bad lol

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"The OP was doing well until he said "would you let a stranger visit you in hospital".

This being Fabswingers we presume that you were meeting to see if you were compatible for sex ?

So what is the difference between meeting a stranger for sex and a stranger visiting you in hospital to wish you well and perhaps offer some comfort ?"

Hmmm so a first meet with a man who could turn out to be an axe murderer, and you want them to turn up at a hospital where they will be able to see your surname and where you live?

I am assuming when I write this post that everyone takes lots of precautions about safety when meeting someone new?

If it was me in hospital and I was single, I would want my family around me not a stranger I am meeting for NSA sex.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

ok the op as in me is a she not a he. I had my mother popping in and out bruises on my face concussion and whiplash would you be in the mood for that. Well maybe you would by i wasn't and I am allowed to say no. I prefer to be at my best when I meet someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

purplejin hun hope ur feeling better soon

but u gotta understand why he was asking

Q's lol u do hear some pish off ppl i got

stood up last ngt an his excuse was he got

2 d*unk fs then had the cheek 2 ask if i

was free 2day..yea right a new pair a

earings he be getting lol

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By *unterslickCouple
over a year ago

tullamore

dont think anyone is blaming you,and if they are tough,life happens and people have emergencies so if people cant come to terms with that its simple,blosk them or at least dont reply

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No I dont have to understand at all. I told him the truth if he chose not to believe it thats his problem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No I dont have to understand at all. I told him the truth if he chose not to believe it thats his problem. "

purplejin i didnt mean u need 2

understand i ment just in genral

u need 2 calm down u put up this

post so expect ppl 2 have there say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The OP was doing well until he said "would you let a stranger visit you in hospital".

This being Fabswingers we presume that you were meeting to see if you were compatible for sex ?

So what is the difference between meeting a stranger for sex and a stranger visiting you in hospital to wish you well and perhaps offer some comfort ?

Hmmm so a first meet with a man who could turn out to be an axe murderer, and you want them to turn up at a hospital where they will be able to see your surname and where you live?

I am assuming when I write this post that everyone takes lots of precautions about safety when meeting someone new?

If it was me in hospital and I was single, I would want my family around me not a stranger I am meeting for NSA sex."

A valid point but Sasha has been in hospital twice recently and the only identifying information available for anyone passing her bed or sitting besides her was her first name.

I was in hospital in Kilmarnock for a couple of months many years ago, my family lived in the midlands and could not get up to visit me, I was very greatfull for all the visitors I got who had actually come to the ward to visit others and when they realised I didnt get any visitors always made a point of coming over and spending a little time with me.

Back in the 80s I spent 2 years in hospital and again had many strangers come and visit me, I was greatfull to them all.

So I appologise to anyone who doesn't agree with me but thats life, I never expect everyone to agree with me and whilst I will not agree with everyone else I do respect your right to have your views.

I do sympathise with the OP because it does seem (from one side of the story of course) that she was being given the 3rd degree and virtually being called a liar but sadly that is something that the many timewasters on the internet have brought into our train of thought when people cancel meets.

Meanwhile, hope your better now or soon after your ordeal hun.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No I dont have to understand at all. I told him the truth if he chose not to believe it thats his problem.

purplejin i didnt mean u need 2

understand i ment just in genral

u need 2 calm down u put up this

post so expect ppl 2 have there say

No need for me to calm down because I am calm. I fully expect people to have their say. If I didn't I wouldn't have posted. Maybe I am just not as cynical as most and am an honest person. I give honesty and expect respect for that honesty not the third degree from someone I have not yet met.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think its creepy that he would want to visit you in hospital,and i would sever all contact with him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

get well soon honey.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

thanks feeling better today but a little sore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel you've done the right thing.

Even if he DID have suspicions about whether or not you were telling the truth he should have done the right thing and took it on the chin, wished you well, and asked you to contact him if and when you were well enough.

I personally don't think he should have questioned you knowing that you were laid up in hospital, why give you something else to deal with (inviting a stranger to come and visit you) when you should just be focussed on getting yourself sorted.

But then I'm not him, we all have different ways of dealing with things.

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Its good to hear your slowly feeling better.

If I had an accident and was in the same situation then would not want to meet this man in a hospital as want to look my best not laid up on a hospital bed looking pale and in pain from an accident. I would want to have nice smelling hair and everything shaved and feel good about myself.

Not sure why anyone would want a stranger from a swing site to come visit me and start having a ok so why do you swing conversation in hospital in public when beds are very close. Just seems to be a bad idea.

If it was a friend from a swing site that I had met before then wouldnt mind them visiting me, but a stranger, no. Not for me.

The main thing is your recovery xx

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