FabSwingers.com forum: This is a great site but...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I love this site it's really alot of fun the only thing that annoys me is time wasters and I bet on not the only way that seems to find the.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"I love this site it's really alot of fun the only thing that annoys me is time wasters and I bet on not the only way that seems to find the. "

and with anyone that mentions the "t" word...

op.... Define "Timewaster".....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never have an issue with time wasters (to me they are people who agree to a meet then no show with no contact after you've travelled to the venue) This site has all the tools you need to avoid them, the rest is up to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Definitely need a definition of timewaster from the OP. So many different definitions.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This woman said to me come to mine it'll be a great night guarantee etc.. I didn't really want to go as it was like 60 miles away and I get there and she says can we just talk about it. Now I wouldn't of minded If she had said she just wanted to talk in the first place but hyping it up and it was just a waste of time....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This woman said to me come to mine it'll be a great night guarantee etc.. I didn't really want to go as it was like 60 miles away and I get there and she says can we just talk about it. Now I wouldn't of minded If she had said she just wanted to talk in the first place but hyping it up and it was just a waste of time.... "

So you met for real and she didn't want to take it further? Maybe she shouldn't have hyped it up but its either parties right to not want to go further.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

[Removed by poster at 14/09/14 13:27:58]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah I respect that she didn't want to do anything but I just wished she's of said from the start then I would have been happy to just chat and discuss things.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

so because it wasn't a guarentee.... you label her a timewaster....

okay!!!!!

if you didn't want to go... why the hell did you go!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah I respect that she didn't want to do anything but I just wished she's of said from the start then I would have been happy to just chat and discuss things. "

I think if you expect anything with a meet then you may be disappointed. If you go with no expectations then there's no pressure on either person and the fun tends to just happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah I respect that she didn't want to do anything but I just wished she's of said from the start then I would have been happy to just chat and discuss things. "

Surely it's common sense to discuss what sort meet its going to be! Is this a case of cock ruling head?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love this site it's really alot of fun the only thing that annoys me is time wasters and I bet on not the only way that seems to find the. "
NEVER MET ONE....seems its just men that come across timewasters,what are they anyway?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah I respect that she didn't want to do anything but I just wished she's of said from the start then I would have been happy to just chat and discuss things.

I think if you expect anything with a meet then you may be disappointed. If you go with no expectations then there's no pressure on either person and the fun tends to just happen."

This

never assume your entitled to anything just go with an open mind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love this site it's really alot of fun the only thing that annoys me is time wasters and I bet on not the only way that seems to find the. NEVER MET ONE....seems its just men that come across timewasters,what are they anyway?"

Time wasters don't meet do they???! She was real, she was there when he showed but for whatever reason, didn't want to play. I'd never agree to fun with someone I'd never met socially before as you just don't know if they're going to look anything like their pics or you're going to feel comfortable with them. Maybe she just felt uncomfortable?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are time wasters for sure we don't meet very often due to shift work and being parents. Although we do go on cam in chat most weeks and enjoy the forums.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and this is why this site should never allow name and shame. To me she wasnt a time waster. She may of mislead but the only person wasted time was yourself. No meet comes with a guarantee. Consent is always needed and people can and do change their minds. If you want a guarantee hire an escort.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is second post today about this first guy travelled 120 mile round trip now this guy travelled 60 miles didnt say if was round trip.

But hell travelling so far seems to us to be a little desperate.

Are you really that desparate you need to make that sort of journey for a stranger.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" This site has all the tools you need to avoid them, the rest is up to you. "

Its got a psychic premonition tool? Damn Ive missed that one, were is it

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

She met you.

For what ever reason she changed her mind. Maybe there wasn't any attraction ? Maybe something you said put her off? Maybe.......could be any one of a number of reasons.

If you'd got there and not found her attractive or changed your mind - would that make you a timewaster? Or would you have thought "fuck it, I've driven 60 miles, I'll give her a sympathy shag!" ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"seems its just men that come across timewasters,what are they anyway?"

No couples to we've been left sat waiting many times by couples and men and women. All fully varified all with pics one even did a fem to fem call then no showed. They are timewasters!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" This site has all the tools you need to avoid them, the rest is up to you.

Its got a psychic premonition tool? Damn Ive missed that one, were is it

Its called gut instinct. If something seems too good to be true, it probably is. If there's the slightest doubt in my mind then I won't pursue it but I only meet socially first which works very well for me, not been stood up or let down in 3 years.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We had way more no shows when we did socials first. I guess people couldnt be bothered to show up just for a coffee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We had way more no shows when we did socials first. I guess people couldnt be bothered to show up just for a coffee

I found it the other way around when I first came on here. I now take the view that if they can't be bothered to meet locally for a quick drink then would they actually show for anything else? Probably not. My selection process works well for me, time wasters are not an issue in my fab world, hurrah!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is second post today about this first guy travelled 120 mile round trip now this guy travelled 60 miles didnt say if was round trip.

But hell travelling so far seems to us to be a little desperate.

Are you really that desparate you need to make that sort of journey for a stranger."

Some people travel long distances for people they feel a strong attraction to. Not all people are desperate for sex on here and I suspect a lot more people meet than bail

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We had way more no shows when we did socials first. I guess people couldnt be bothered to show up just for a coffee

Lol we never garuntee anything will happen but dont rule it out either. Our way of avoiding timewasters is hold all meets at our home. If they no show we havnt wasted anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"She met you.

For what ever reason she changed her mind. Maybe there wasn't any attraction ? Maybe something you said put her off? Maybe.......could be any one of a number of reasons.

If you'd got there and not found her attractive or changed your mind - would that make you a timewaster? Or would you have thought "fuck it, I've driven 60 miles, I'll give her a sympathy shag!" ?

Not a timewaster in my book. OP it is all down to your expectations I - you expected a shag and did not get one - so the lady is then a timewaster. There are no guaranytees.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guarantees even - flaming phone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cant ever expect at all. Ive had meets that I've chose not to go ahead as nothing like their photos or personality online. I felt bad but I wasn't going to go through with it. If you want a better guarantee get a prostitute, but even then you cant guarantee that.

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By *ilthygorgeous1Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

Have you considered that in the plane light of day you may not have been what she was expecting?? No offence intended but people do have the right to change there mind and you should approach every meet expecting this to happen. People sometimes turn out to be very different from the picture you get from profiles and messages.

It may have been her way of saying thanks but no thanks

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By *ilthygorgeous1Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

[Removed by poster at 14/09/14 14:42:52]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think she was more horney when she typed but not that much when meeting lol.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I love this site it's really alot of fun the only thing that annoys me is time wasters and I bet on not the only way that seems to find the. "

Seven years: not encountered one...go figure.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We had way more no shows when we did socials first. I guess people couldnt be bothered to show up just for a coffee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are some strange women on here that's for sure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah I respect that she didn't want to do anything but I just wished she's of said from the start then I would have been happy to just chat and discuss things. "

Maybe you wasted her time as when you got there you were not as attractive to her as your pics suggest?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to do parties at my home.

My party invite list normally included approximately 20/30 invites to single guys - the reason - for every 10 you invite ONE will turn up.

Am not saying single guys are timewasters, most are just so nervous (which as a single fem walking into somewhere new not knowing people etc I completely understand) but guys tend to be under the impression that the minute they walk into the party they will be expected to strip and perform (which for anyone that has ever been to a house party will know that is so not the case) but when you have 8/10 single fems turn up at a party plus 10 couples then its very frustrating when guys have said Absolutely Definitely will be there and then NO SHOW.

Having said that the 3/4 single guys that did turn up well they had the best nights of their lives lmao in fact dont think they came downstairs for at least 5 hours and everytime they tried they were dragged back up haha

So GUYS dont expect Sex ever, its a Swingers Site not a Pay as you Fuck site and if you are lucky enough to be invited to meet up with people just remember that is not a guarantee of ANYTHING

Just saying like lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe you should clarify what type of meet you're having before you travel all that way next time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah I respect that she didn't want to do anything but I just wished she's of said from the start then I would have been happy to just chat and discuss things. "

It did waste your time but I think you've probably done better than most x chalk it up to experience and learn from it x

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By *rinterestingMan
over a year ago

London

"I love this site it's really alot of fun the only thing that annoys me is time wasters and I bet on not the only way that seems to find the.

Seven years: not encountered one...go figure."

To be fair it is a whole other experience on here for women. You have choice enough that you can make sure that you are picking someone real without feeling like you have to take a bit of a risk. Whereas sometimes men on this site generally have far less options so encounter far more risk.

I personally have encountered many timewasters but have worked out how to them out better and have certain procedures I go through before I meet doesn't mean a few don't still dropped through the net. I think you'll be surprised at the amount of legitimate looking fake profiles especially of women.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I love this site it's really alot of fun the only thing that annoys me is time wasters and I bet on not the only way that seems to find the.

Seven years: not encountered one...go figure.

I'm 53, hardly beating them off with a stick. The difference is I know what I want, set my own parameters for a meet and wouldn't contemplate travelling 60m out of my way let alone 60 miles.

There's also the definition of timewaster. I've met men who have been rude/creepy/pushy/boring/older than their pic etc who I haven't played with: one I didn't even sit down, I left he was so unpleasant. I wouldn't call any of them timewasters, they turned up. I've also met men who were on paper perfect but lacked sexual chemistry.

That's why I never "meet now" or arrange sex without a social meet first: if you don't fancy them no harm done. Could get tricky if you open the door to some bloke with a hard on you don't fancy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had two no shows in my time here. Had contact by text and messaging here the night before, they failed to show up. Reported and blocked.

I also consider people timewasters who chat saying yes I want to meet etc, but you can't pin them down to a actual date

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By *isty286Couple
over a year ago

Dorset

We are always trying to arrange couples to meet us at local dogging sites, lots don't bother turning up, but as we are there together and enjoy messing about with each other in the car .. our time is never wasted..lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I used to do parties at my home.

My party invite list normally included approximately 20/30 invites to single guys - the reason - for every 10 you invite ONE will turn up.

So GUYS dont expect Sex ever, its a Swingers Site not a Pay as you Fuck site and if you are lucky enough to be invited to meet up with people just remember that is not a guarantee of ANYTHING

Just saying like lol

Have found the same (though maybe only a 1 to 5 ratio). I now only invite guys I KNOW are genuine and that have been verified as such by myself or close friends.

Shame as I have never yet not turned up to an event.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've met people straight away for sex, but there has been that attraction both online and reality.

I've also met people face to face and found no spark or attraction.

Best just to arrange to meet, but be clear either party has the option to leave if they don't wish to carry on.

No expectations = no disappointments.

If your dick is making all the decisions and driving the agenda, then go somewhere where sex is more likely to happen like a sauna or club.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only ever when organising gangbangs have we encountered a no show from guys.

And only once have we not attended a meet due to illness - but we let them know, we were then called 'timewasters'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love this site it's really alot of fun the only thing that annoys me is time wasters and I bet on not the only way that seems to find the.

Seven years: not encountered one...go figure.

I'm 53, hardly beating them off with a stick. The difference is I know what I want, set my own parameters for a meet and wouldn't contemplate travelling 60m out of my way let alone 60 miles.

That's why I never "meet now" or arrange sex without a social meet first: if you don't fancy them no harm done. Could get tricky if you open the door to some bloke with a hard on you don't fancy!"

It's all about how you look at it. I've met people for initial social meets that didn't go further. And chatted to people online and it became clear we weren't matched. I don't see them as timewasters either. It's just all part of finding compatible people!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...

I also consider people timewasters who chat saying yes I want to meet etc, but you can't pin them down to a actual date "

How are they time wasters? If people do that they obviously aren't all that interested so just stop talking to them.

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