FabSwingers.com forum: How Soon is Too Soon to Chat on Phone?

By *hil_SW19 OP Man
over a year ago

Raynes Park

Hi All,

Hope everyone's enjoying the hot weather.

Over the past few months I've met and chatted to a number of people on the site - enjoying it a lot but one thing I've always wondered if how soon should you talk on the phone.

In the day of online chat / IM, it's very easy to get to know people but I like to speak on the phone.

Personally, I like to talk on the phone as soon as possible - so within a week or so but know people have busy lives.

So what do other people do - what after a few messages or a couple of weeks?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thats the thing isnt it, ive a guy that is persistently wanting to chat but i work, he doesnt care

then im sat in the car, he wants to ring me! he rang last night without warning, im in the middle of cooking dinner! wtf for is all i can say now as im seriously hacked off that he, even though i told him ive meets and work all week, still wants to chat!!

Quite frankly, id rather not

oh yes and i DID tell him that weekends were better, he got snotty "another one that doesnt want to chat"

sorry but ive a life outside of swinging, some people just dont realise that and becomes pushy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As long as someone is prepared for the call to be at a time convenient for us both then I have no problem speaking to someone within a few days.

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

not sure about "too soon", but if after 6 months the person isn't willing to... move on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you say chat on phone as soon as possible do you mean so you can get off over the phone kinda phone sex or just kinda get to know ya phone chat ? We only ask for mobile number if we intend to meet the person & that so if there's a problem we can contact each other

* Sits on coffin *.

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By *hil_SW19 OP Man
over a year ago

Raynes Park

I think some people forget people have lives outside of swinging.

I always text before I call to check it's okay try to make a firm "let's call at x pm". and like my learned fellow said after a few weeks / months I might think it's not going to happen.

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By *hil_SW19 OP Man
over a year ago

Raynes Park

"When you say chat on phone as soon as possible do you mean so you can get off over the phone kinda phone sex or just kinda get to know ya phone chat ? We only ask for mobile number if we intend to meet the person & that so if there's a problem we can contact each other

* Sits on coffin *.

I mean chat on phone about organising a meet / validating each other - not into phone sex - rather do that in person

Have fun on the coffin - you also think Twiglet vampires are wimps?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We insist on a phone call to confirm a meet,but we never give our personal numbers our we have a swing phone thats switched on if we are looking for a meet or expecting a call then its turned of that way we get no unwanted phone calls all hours of the day and night

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I speak on the phone right away. Im not here for pen pals.

If people fear using the phone then I don't think they are up to much sexually or even socially.

Oh ....and I don't use the phone to chat as a rule.

For me the 'net' and the phone are simply mediums to meet.

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

I usually chat on the phone after a couple of messages. Gives me a good feel about whether or not its worth even considering taking things further. And if someone cant hold a quick conversation, then Id probably not be that interested anyway.

Also Im too bleedin' lazy to keep typing all night...

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

oh the joys of "texts".... thats why i also text first to see if they are free to chat... also i can be really shy on the phone (oi you... no laughing at the back) basically i try not to make the phone call into being "an interview" because quite frankly I am shite at them.....

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

"oh the joys of "texts".... thats why i also text first to see if they are free to chat... also i can be really shy on the phone (oi you... no laughing at the back) basically i try not to make the phone call into being "an interview" because quite frankly I am shite at them..... "

So what skills do you feel you can bring to this post?

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

I am rubbish on the phone - truly awful, nobody would meet me based on a phone call!

So the answer to me is "as late as possible, ideally never"!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/07/10 20:44:50]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You also think Twiglet vampires are wimps ?

Erm........

* gets bk in coffin *

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By *hil_SW19 OP Man
over a year ago

Raynes Park

"You also think Twiglet vampires are wimps ?

Erm........

* gets bk in coffin * "

Well compared to those in 'True Blood', 'Buffy', 'Daybreakers' and '300 Days of Night'

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By *ansue35Couple
over a year ago

yorkshire

I do not like it when people are pushy asking for phone chats after an message or two.

Do not mind phone chat a few days before a meet. can't see why weeks before a meet.

But am shy anyway

Sue

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

We only give out a number if we have all decided we want to meet and that is normally after a chat on MSN first. We don't give it out to have endless chats on it, it is literally just to confirm arrangements and to make sure we both have each others numbers in case one of us has to cancel.

We don't give it out to everyone we speak to and it is just a phone we use for swinging, so we don't get harrased by people just wanting to chat whenever they fancy it as it is usually switched off between meets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will you quit with the shy thing: I'm not buying it - lol!

This is not a one size fits all situation. Some people like to exchange loads of messages on site, progress to emails, then texts before talking on the phone.

Personally my life wont be long enough for that, and I have neither the time nor inclination to be forever ping ponging messages back and forth: the whole point is to meet.

Once I've decided I'll meet the person, usually after a couple of messages we talk on the phone til we can arrange a social meet.

What annoys is if they ring at 11pm at night when in bed feeling horny. No one has ever made the mistake of phoning me twice in the night and after I've finished tearing them a new one, a wank is the last thing on their minds!!

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