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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi good afternoon fellow swingers hope your all well does anyone else find it rude how u take the time to introduce yourself to people and they simply delete your message with out so much as a no thank you if someone has the time to message me I will always reply even if it's a thanks for your message but it's a no thanks I no people do get a lot of messages me to ( on average around 35 a day) but always respond does anyone else feel like this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No

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By *trawberry-popWoman
over a year ago

South East Midlands NOT

This subject comes up time and time again. You will always get people who think it's rude and those who don't. I try to reply to all my mail but sometimes it's not worth the hassle!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wondered where today's one was

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Good afternoon James.

I hope you havent paid to be a member as if you had I would be demanding a full refund.

I think its bad behaviour on the recepients part, almost as bad as my spelling.

I'd report them, bloody time wasters

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Was just a thought that's all it takes just as long to type no thanks than it does to delete the message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I say in my profile...if I dont reply your not what im looking for so I dont think im being rude lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Lol yep my spelling is pants

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yes I can see that in your profile so it would alert me not to message you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi good afternoon fellow swingers hope your all well does anyone else find it rude how u take the time to introduce yourself to people and they simply delete your message with out so much as a no thank you if someone has the time to message me I will always reply even if it's a thanks for your message but it's a no thanks I no people do get a lot of messages me to ( on average around 35 a day) but always respond does anyone else feel like this"

If I got 35 messages a day I'd probably reply to them. But it's not unrealistic for single women and some couples to get ten times that many.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's ruder not to read a profile to see if you fit the bill in our opinion tbh

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By *ickomxxxMan
over a year ago

Oxfordshire

Welcome to the real world!

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Lol yep my spelling is pants "

I was on about my spelling

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I wouldn't message them if I didn't think I fitted there bill

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't message them if I didn't think I fitted there bill"

Thing is James you may think you fit their bill but they may think you don't,if they did they would get back to you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi good afternoon fellow swingers hope your all well does anyone else find it rude how u take the time to introduce yourself to people and they simply delete your message with out so much as a no thank you if someone has the time to message me I will always reply even if it's a thanks for your message but it's a no thanks I no people do get a lot of messages me to ( on average around 35 a day) but always respond does anyone else feel like this

If I got 35 messages a day I'd probably reply to them. But it's not unrealistic for single women and some couples to get ten times that many. "

We used to get 70 plus per day!

If they fit our profile they get a polite reply - even if it is no.

On the other hand why do people deserve any response if they cannot show us the courtesy of even a brief scan of our profile?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yes I agree but what I'm saying is even if I've no interest in the person who messages me I still reply to them just think it's polite I went away last weekend I came back to 225 messages I still replied to them all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I say in my profile...if I dont reply your not what im looking for so I dont think im being rude lol"

same here - if our messages are deleted we simply write in our notes - sometimes folk mass delete so if we really like we will try again at a later date and often get a positive response -

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Good point jimp end of the day I always read all the profile because how would u no what the person was looking for if you hadn't read it

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By *r and mrs sanddancerCouple
over a year ago

BOLDON COLLIERY

from owners in FAQ

It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks horney couple never thought of that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you messaging people using hackneyed, cheesy or disrespectful language? Personally, I refuse to answer messages that are very poorly written (usuall when pissed), in txtspk, or have not even read my profile.

Just remember politeness on your part is always worth it. Why degenerate into another rude ignoramus. Stick to your standards, its worth it in the end.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes I agree but what I'm saying is even if I've no interest in the person who messages me I still reply to them just think it's polite I went away last weekend I came back to 225 messages I still replied to them all"

225 messages? Wow! My life is not long enough,ill be considered rude by those I don't reply to and adorable by those I do reply too,im happy with that

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Good point jimp end of the day I always read all the profile because how would u no what the person was looking for if you hadn't read it"

Quite right. If you dont read to the end you won't see the bit that says if you do message us make sure you put 'blah de blah' in the heading, they still just read and delete. Fuck sake single women, sort it out

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Good response I get probably 60-40 in favour of replies must be just me who is to nice and always replies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry I didnt see in the terms and conditions I HAVE TO REPLY TO EVERY MESSAGE.

if this has changed can someone let me know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was up to 189 messages when I woke up today

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having looked at your profile we are really wondering why you get 35 messages per day. We delete messages where we can see the sender has neither read our profile nor meets our criteria.

Remember the recipient never asked for anyone to message them in the 1st place and its not rude, just wasting so much time continually saying no

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Jacqs there isn't no rule saying must reply I simply asked the question do people find it rude if there message gets deleted with out so much as a simple no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women do it cos they get spoilt for choice lol, so they can afford to do it

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

When our filters were off, 35 messages per day was a quiet one.

Even copying and pasting "No thank you" responses takes time and you've then got the replies to your replies, whether they're:

"Ok, thank you anyway".

"Why not?".

or simply abuse.

Not to mention the new messages that come in just as quickly as you can reply to and delete the old ones.

Some of us do have lives to live, you know.

The site rules clearly state that no response should be taken as a "No thank you".

If being polite and having manners means we have to waste our time responding to every Tom, Dick, Harry & Jane who messages us that we're not interested in, then we will happily take the "rude/ignorant/up ourselves" label.

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By *emon tart Double creamCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

You receive 35 messages a day....surely most of your time is spent replying to these messages then?

Then you probably get a response from your reply from at least half of them, unless you've said no thanks, so I think you must be too busy to worry about getting more messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry I didnt see in the terms and conditions I HAVE TO REPLY TO EVERY MESSAGE.

if this has changed can someone let me know "

Totally agree. Used to reply to all. Then more than not got abuse.

If I don't reply to a couple of word message then tbh take it as a no thanks not interested. Simples

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Flip flop why do you say that I've never had an issue and met some great people on here so never really struggled don't get much time to meet these days with work commitments

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe they read your profile and it isn't what they are after. Mind you one pic and a brief sentence isn't much to go on x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry I didnt see in the terms and conditions I HAVE TO REPLY TO EVERY MESSAGE.

if this has changed can someone let me know

Totally agree. Used to reply to all. Then more than not got abuse.

If I don't reply to a couple of word message then tbh take it as a no thanks not interested. Simples "

its why I dont reply to.all

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Some good points very well put must be just me that's to polite xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry I didnt see in the terms and conditions I HAVE TO REPLY TO EVERY MESSAGE.

if this has changed can someone let me know "

Its changed you should be ashamed of yourself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We do meet single guys and have some as friends but we do delete and block those who are crude or ignore our profile sorry but they deserve that treatment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No not rude at all really just move on and don't dwell on it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes I agree but what I'm saying is even if I've no interest in the person who messages me I still reply to them just think it's polite I went away last weekend I came back to 225 messages I still replied to them all"

i wish i got that many messages a year

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

There is an oft used comparison that bears repeating it likens messages on here to the type of mail that advertises pizza for instance. Dominoes frequently put a leaflet through our door one of us does eat pizza but neither of us would ever go to Dominoes I don't think it's rude of us if we don't write back and tell them. Dominoes wisely expend their energies on those that are interested in what they have to offer.

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

The only ones I ignore are off admin

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Some good points very well put must be just me that's to polite xxxx"

Amazed u had 225 msgs even i dont get anywhere near that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your averaging 35 messages a day and came home to 225 after a weekend !!!!!!! and your on here moaning about getting responses ?????????????

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts


"There is an oft used comparison that bears repeating it likens messages on here to the type of mail that advertises pizza for instance. Dominoes frequently put a leaflet through our door one of us does eat pizza but neither of us would ever go to Dominoes I don't think it's rude of us if we don't write back and tell them. Dominoes wisely expend their energies on those that are interested in what they have to offer. "

Damn you, I want Dominos now!

They've stopped doing the Meteora though.

- Amy. x

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Your averaging 35 messages a day and came home to 225 after a weekend !!!!!!! and your on here moaning about getting responses ?????????????"

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes I agree but what I'm saying is even if I've no interest in the person who messages me I still reply to them just think it's polite I went away last weekend I came back to 225 messages I still replied to them all

i wish i got that many messages a year "

most was deleted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry I didnt see in the terms and conditions I HAVE TO REPLY TO EVERY MESSAGE.

if this has changed can someone let me know

Its changed you should be ashamed of yourself "

come punish me sir

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I had 225 in a weekend not a day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi good afternoon fellow swingers hope your all well does anyone else find it rude how u take the time to introduce yourself to people and they simply delete your message with out so much as a no thank you if someone has the time to message me I will always reply even if it's a thanks for your message but it's a no thanks I no people do get a lot of messages me to ( on average around 35 a day) but always respond does anyone else feel like this"

I've just spent nearly 2 hours going through 102 messages just from the last 2 days. I replied to the 30-odd that had actually read our profile properly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why worry when you are behind a machine.

You will never meet, move on.

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So 11 months 35 a day thats 12495 messages since you joined and only one veri ???

Not that we should knock it but theres choosy then theres this

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"I had 225 in a weekend not a day "

Thats way more than i have ever had in a weekend woaw and heres me thinkin single guys hardly got any, not sayn ur lyin but i dont believe that for a second

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had about 5 messages since last week looooooooool.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"There is an oft used comparison that bears repeating it likens messages on here to the type of mail that advertises pizza for instance. Dominoes frequently put a leaflet through our door one of us does eat pizza but neither of us would ever go to Dominoes I don't think it's rude of us if we don't write back and tell them. Dominoes wisely expend their energies on those that are interested in what they have to offer.

Damn you, I want Dominos now!

They've stopped doing the Meteora though.

- Amy. x"

I've never been and it isn't me that likes pizza so I'm ok lol x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Muffin I'm not worried suppose it's how I've been brought up to be polite that's all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Good response I get probably 60-40 in favour of replies must be just me who is to nice and always replies"

Just because people don't reply, it doesn't mean they're not nice or polite! Read the sites FAQ and you'll see it's not rude not to reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always say no thank you. 35 messages a day? lucky then, lucky if I get 5

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Muffin I'm not worried suppose it's how I've been brought up to be polite that's all "

So! You imply that those who fail to reply have been brought up to be impolite.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Not lieing at all but a lot of them was from a party invite I put out on my status

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Good response I get probably 60-40 in favour of replies must be just me who is to nice and always replies

Just because people don't reply, it doesn't mean they're not nice or polite! Read the sites FAQ and you'll see it's not rude not to reply."

This

Maybe hes rude for not reading the FAQs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi good afternoon fellow swingers hope your all well does anyone else find it rude how u take the time to introduce yourself to people and they simply delete your message with out so much as a no thank you if someone has the time to message me I will always reply even if it's a thanks for your message but it's a no thanks I no people do get a lot of messages me to ( on average around 35 a day) but always respond does anyone else feel like this"

am i the only one who's finding it hard to believe that a single guy with only a cock shot and a two lined profile gets on average 35 messages a day?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"I always say no thank you. 35 messages a day? lucky then, lucky if I get 5 "

Us too. Apart from friends.

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Not lieing at all but a lot of them was from a party invite I put out on my status"

And i bet 90% were from males

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

I was also brought up to be polite but also not to be a doormat.

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Hi good afternoon fellow swingers hope your all well does anyone else find it rude how u take the time to introduce yourself to people and they simply delete your message with out so much as a no thank you if someone has the time to message me I will always reply even if it's a thanks for your message but it's a no thanks I no people do get a lot of messages me to ( on average around 35 a day) but always respond does anyone else feel like this

am i the only one who's finding it hard to believe that a single guy with only a cock shot and a two lined profile gets on average 35 messages a day? "

Nope dont believe it for a second lol not a chance in hell

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi good afternoon fellow swingers hope your all well does anyone else find it rude how u take the time to introduce yourself to people and they simply delete your message with out so much as a no thank you if someone has the time to message me I will always reply even if it's a thanks for your message but it's a no thanks I no people do get a lot of messages me to ( on average around 35 a day) but always respond does anyone else feel like this

am i the only one who's finding it hard to believe that a single guy with only a cock shot and a two lined profile gets on average 35 messages a day? "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

My face and full body pic was on until I took it off for personal reasons maybe that's y and before people start I'm not big headed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I was up to 189 messages when I woke up today "

i currently have 526 unready messages in my inbox, how long would it take to reply to all then, i don't even read them all, i skim them and just open ones from people i know or who's pic or first line catches my eye

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

It's a bit harsh to imply that the op is lying, he's explained why he got so many.

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By *oulou45Woman
over a year ago

Bucks

O
"Was just a thought that's all it takes just as long to type no thanks than it does to delete the message"
when you reply with thanks but no thanks, do they keep sending more messages? .Some don't know the meaning of the word no. Hence why a lot of us female's don't reply to all mail sent to us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I was up to 189 messages when I woke up today

i currently have 526 unready messages in my inbox, how long would it take to reply to all then, i don't even read them all, i skim them and just open ones from people i know or who's pic or first line catches my eye"

im.the same x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" OWas just a thought that's all it takes just as long to type no thanks than it does to delete the message when you reply with thanks but no thanks, do they keep sending more messages? .Some don't know the meaning of the word no. Hence why a lot of us female's don't reply to all mail sent to us."

this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Muffin I'm not worried suppose it's how I've been brought up to be polite that's all "
I can fully understand that, but it is not a face to face rudeness, they are so different.

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

225? Deluded.

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By *otandtasty7Woman
over a year ago

wakefield

I tried the reply thank u but no thanx in a nice way then ended up with a long line of messages

why u not interested

was it something I said

you dont even know me lets chat and see

and lots more so sorry I hold up my hands I dont reply to all nothing personal just not wasting your time or mine its easier to delete without a reply sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wow you ladies need have a job in itself trying to keep up with messages. If you need a pa to help reply to all of these for you I am more that happy to say no on your behalf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I tried the reply thank u but no thanx in a nice way then ended up with a long line of messages

why u not interested

was it something I said

you dont even know me lets chat and see

and lots more so sorry I hold up my hands I dont reply to all nothing personal just not wasting your time or mine its easier to delete without a reply sorry "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"225? Deluded. "

most successful single males get messages on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"wow you ladies need have a job in itself trying to keep up with messages. If you need a pa to help reply to all of these for you I am more that happy to say no on your behalf "

awww ta, I'm skint thought so will have to be payment in kind

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By *itten-xxxWoman
over a year ago

North West

I reply if their nice messages. I stopped replying to all when I started getting nasty abusive messages back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I tried the reply thank u but no thanx in a nice way then ended up with a long line of messages

why u not interested

was it something I said

you dont even know me lets chat and see

and lots more so sorry I hold up my hands I dont reply to all nothing personal just not wasting your time or mine its easier to delete without a reply sorry "

You know what this is a perfect example and I still don't understand once a lady has taken the time to say thanks but no thanks would you continue to waste there time and yours trying to find a reason why?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

My mindset is that if they delete my message without replying then that's up to them. It's not rude not to reply. I don't check to see if they've read it as it seems pointless - after all, what if they have? What if they haven't?

Maybe they won't delete really really good messages. Who knows?

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

After a bit of investigating on your behalf James It seems they love an attached cock pic with the message. Try that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not actually replying is sometimes the least rude way of saying no.

In a number of cases if I was being totally honest I would be replying for example saying that "since they were exceptionally ugly with the spelling level of a retarded 4 year old there is no way in this life we would ever consider a meet with them".

Probably better just to delete & say nothing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When we first joined we thought that the single guys were taking time to look at our profile then right a lovely message.... then we realised that they were copy and paste messages

The other one is do you want a f**k message.

If your message is the one true written one amoungst them we have to figure out which it is

Hence why they get deleted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"After a bit of investigating on your behalf James It seems they love an attached cock pic with the message. Try that "

OMG I think he has found the golden ticket

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I always say no thank you. 35 messages a day? lucky then, lucky if I get 5

Us too. Apart from friends."

maybe one or two

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I send a minimum of 300 fancy a fuck messages a day, if I get no reply I just think up yours it's your loss darling and move on.

Gimp

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It doesn't bother me the slightest if I don't get a reply to me that's clear enough answer they are not interested so I leave it and move on I won't keep pestering like some people do on here it's very annoying and if I do get a message from someone that's not my type I block straight away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perhaps your so polite it puts people off

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"Yes I agree but what I'm saying is even if I've no interest in the person who messages me I still reply to them just think it's polite I went away last weekend I came back to 225 messages I still replied to them all"

lol - really? Z

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