FabSwingers.com forum: Top tips repository

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Leave your FAB top tips here. Also any lifestyle tips or ingenious ideas are welcome.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Don't shout 'Ra-Haaaarr, me hearties!' at gangbangs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

always carry baby wipes with you!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I made a home made flogger out of a dozen long cable ties secured at the top with another cable tie. You can move the cable tie like a collar up and down to spread out the rest. Also doubles up as extra restraints. But have some scissors on standby!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"always carry baby wipes with you!

and condoms. At a club recently I was surprised how many guys where asking for them. The owner was selling them a pound at a time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do not attempt to seduce a woman at a club or party with a condom from your previous fuck still attached to your cock

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you copy and paste message remember to at least change the names on the message

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"If you copy and paste message remember to at least change the names on the message

lol, you've had that too?

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

if you are going to rant about leaving this fucking useless site, go with a scraping of dignity left....

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By *nigmatic1Woman
over a year ago

A seaside town near you!

If you're going to lie to someone then make sure you have a good memory and write down what you said in the first place just in case you drop yourself in it!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

always wipe your cock on an inconspicuous part of the courtains.

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By *nigmatic1Woman
over a year ago

A seaside town near you!

"If you copy and paste message remember to at least change the names on the message

lol, you've had that too?

Me three! Numpty's eh? haha!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you copy and paste message remember to at least change the names on the message

lol, you've had that too?

Got one this morning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't eat yellow snow

Shut the door after you've left

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you choose to have a shouty sweary ranty profile then expect shouty sweary ranty responses to it

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

if you do find yourself blocked by someone, smile and move on...

it helps the blood pressure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

don't claim to be 1 thing when your veries says your another! mainly a man claiming to be a couple thing or claims to be a certain sexuality

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

women like sex as much as men and they have every right so to do. It doesn't make them anything other than women who like sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never say awwww that looks like a cock only smaller

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"If you copy and paste message remember to at least change the names on the message

lol, you've had that too?

Me three! Numpty's eh? haha!"

Let's not forget the one's addressed to "the two of you" - last time I looked there was only one of me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"always carry baby wipes with you!

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

jumping up and down like a sulky baby akin to a 4 year old not getting a kinder egg, if they can't open it and find the goodies.....

a pair of legs won't...

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"women like sex as much as men and they have every right so to do. It doesn't make them anything other than women who like sex

that should have said remember in front of it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Remember that there is a very informative website called Google.

Most of your forum questions are easily answered by using your own common sense.

If you need feedback on your profile, then your profile is probably already rubbish.

If you're struggling to meet people on an anonymous sex website, try going outside more often. Interact.

Being crass is not the same as being sexy.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

If you are so disillusioned by this site that you feel the need to post on the forums about 'bitches up themselves and the guys who smarm up to them to get meets', it might be time to remove yourself from the site.

Outside someones age/sexuality/gender preferences? Move on to the next profile. Do not post on the forums expecting sympathy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Remember that there is a very informative website called Google.

Most of your forum questions are easily answered by using your own common sense.

If you need feedback on your profile, then your profile is probably already rubbish.

If you're struggling to meet people on an anonymous sex website, try going outside more often. Interact.

Being crass is not the same as being sexy."

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Do not make getting sex the main objective in your life. It's a bit sad and you look desperate. Try logging off the internet and doing something you used to enjoy before you got into internet porn.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont claim to be a "Proffessional, Proffesional or profeshinal until you can at least spell the fucking word!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Learn to use spellcheck. Even if you're the village idiot, there is no excuse for not being able to spell. It's 2014.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Google reverse image is your friend on sites like these

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

Assuming that because a woman is fat and or older that she will be grateful for Amy attention and say yes to any offer is a mistake - mature heffalumps are in high demand and can pick and choose!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its good to talk..

But not with your mouth full

Gimp

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

only approx 1% read the forums, the education of the other 99% may be better via another communication channel...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Google reverse image is your friend on sites like these

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

don't get annoyed when most people skip through your profile just to perve at your pics

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Constantly belittling people over spelling or grammar is not attractive or particularly intelligent

Gimp

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't take a piss facing the wind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Constantly belittling people over spelling or grammar is not attractive or particularly intelligent

Gimp"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Constantly belittling people over spelling or grammar is not attractive or particularly intelligent

Gimp"

You forgot the period at the end of that sentence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Constantly belittling people over spelling or grammar is not attractive or particularly intelligent

Gimp"

Maybe not, but spell check is free and illiteracy is not sexy.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

if this place brings endless drama into your life, it may not be the best place for you....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Constantly belittling people over spelling or grammar is not attractive or particularly intelligent

Gimp

You forgot the period at the end of that sentence. "

It was free period.

Gimp

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

Never leave all of your favourite toys at your fuck buddy's place so you can avoid the awkward 'can I have them back' conversation when you decide to stop fucking them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Google reverse image is your friend on sites like these

already reported today's to fabbed pic because it's from a number of porn sites

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Google reverse image is your friend on sites like these

already reported today's to fabbed pic because it's from a number of porn sites"

The system works it's no longer there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do not attempt to seduce a woman at a club or party with a condom from your previous fuck still attached to your cock

Eww, people really do that ?

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By *ichaelangelaCouple
over a year ago

notts

never say, if that cock was an inch shorter it would be a clitoris

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do not attempt to seduce a woman at a club or party with a condom from your previous fuck still attached to your cock

Eww, people really do that ?

Yes it happened to me at the weekend.....It was a lovely surprise that had me walking off saying eeewwwwww no fucking way mate! Filthy minging man!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do not attempt to seduce a woman at a club or party with a condom from your previous fuck still attached to your cock

Eww, people really do that ?

Yes it happened to me at the weekend.....It was a lovely surprise that had me walking off saying eeewwwwww no fucking way mate! Filthy minging man!

What a guy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do not attempt to seduce a woman at a club or party with a condom from your previous fuck still attached to your cock

Eww, people really do that ?

Yes it happened to me at the weekend.....It was a lovely surprise that had me walking off saying eeewwwwww no fucking way mate! Filthy minging man!

What a guy! "

I know.....I don't know what I do to deserve such chivalry

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Constantly belittling people over spelling or grammar is not attractive or particularly intelligent

Gimp

Maybe not, but spell check is free and illiteracy is not sexy."

Ouch! I'm lucky reading and spelling came easy to me I have a brother to whom it did not and many friends who struggle with it, spell check only helps if you have some idea how to spell the word in the first place and are able to recognise it spelled correctly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lemon juice is good for removing lime scale.

But don't rub it in your eyes

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Lemon juice is good for removing lime scale.

But don't rub it in your eyes "

The limescale or the lemon juice?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Lemon juice is good for removing lime scale.

But don't rub it in your eyes

The limescale or the lemon juice?

Both. Lol

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Lemon juice is good for removing lime scale.

But don't rub it in your eyes

The limescale or the lemon juice?

Both. Lol "

and where are we removing the lime scale from

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

PHILANDERERS: Avoid the embarrassment of shouting out the wrong name in bed by having flings only with girls who have the same name as your wife.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I knew that despite being a 40 year old woman, my tragic love of Viz would eventually result in a thread I could call home.

ANGLERS: Attach a helium balloon to your line and bait the hook with an acorn. Then sit under a tree and "fish" for squirrels. An upturned laundry basket would make an ideal keep-net, but don't forget to throw the squirrels back into the tree at the end of the day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Read the whole profile from top to bottom before sending a message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A polite response to a compliment does not entitle you to inside knicker access

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Avoid premature ejaculation during intercourse by offloading during foreplay.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

BUS DRIVERS. If you see an attractive woman with a low cut top at the bus stop, accelerate and come to a halt 50 feet past the stop. You will then have a great _iew in your nearside mirror as she runs towards you. Finally, accidentally drop her change for a second look.

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

"Constantly belittling people over spelling or grammar is not attractive or particularly intelligent

Gimp

Maybe not, but spell check is free and illiteracy is not sexy."
nor is taking a spelling test before sex!

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Do not attempt to seduce a woman at a club or party with a condom from your previous fuck still attached to your cock

Omg this made me laugh so much!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Make striking firefighters leap into action. Set fire to a porn warehouse and see how quick they move.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do not attempt to seduce a woman at a club or party with a condom from your previous fuck still attached to your cock

Omg this made me laugh so much!

You should have been there! You would have been on the floor laughing

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

White socks are banned!

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

"I knew that despite being a 40 year old woman, my tragic love of Viz would eventually result in a thread I could call home. "

One of my favourite ever Viz Top Tips was along the lines of 'Can't afford the new Florence and The Machine album? Simply throw an owl into a wind chime shop'

I don't know why, but it still makes me roar with laughter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I knew that despite being a 40 year old woman, my tragic love of Viz would eventually result in a thread I could call home.

One of my favourite ever Viz Top Tips was along the lines of 'Can't afford the new Florence and The Machine album? Simply throw an owl into a wind chime shop'

I don't know why, but it still makes me roar with laughter.

Thats is funny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I knew that despite being a 40 year old woman, my tragic love of Viz would eventually result in a thread I could call home.

One of my favourite ever Viz Top Tips was along the lines of 'Can't afford the new Florence and The Machine album? Simply throw an owl into a wind chime shop'

I don't know why, but it still makes me roar with laughter.

I can see why, that's class!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

AIR GUITAR players. Become Air-Ukulele players by shortening the distance between your hands. For that added Formby feeling, substitute head moshing with a cheeky smile and the occasional wink.

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By *isa 59Woman
over a year ago

Newcastle

"If you copy and paste message remember to at least change the names on the message

lol, you've had that too?

Me three! Numpty's eh? haha!

Let's not forget the one's addressed to "the two of you" - last time I looked there was only one of me!

I find that hilarious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

RACISTS. Convince others that you are not a racist by saying 'I'm not a racist, but...' before saying something racist.

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

Switch your phone to 3G before checking Fab whilst at work at lunchtime in case of pervy IT department types giving you knowing looks when they check your wifi login.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When replying to Nigerian lawyers that offer millions in return for a £50.000 finders fee, only send half the money. Keep the rest until you get the paperwork.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

MURDERERS. Need to dispose of a body? Simply parcel it up and post it to yourself via DHL. You will never see it again.

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