FabSwingers.com forum: Clubs with to not enuf real swingers!!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

we've found having been swinging for over 5 years now and been to a fair few swinging club over the country that seems nowadays that is not enough real swingers in the clubs today!

You have to expect newbies of course and couples have to start somewhere but these last 2 years we've noticed a decline in what we think are 'real swingers who have intention to talk to to others in the club!..

There's to many couples that prefer to sit down all nite with no intention of interacting or there's couples there that are soft or full swap and still walk past you in the club like passing ships in the nite then leave a bad review for that club when we know exactly what it was like that night!.

Real swingers we find are not having as much fun these days in club as i think there's to many wannabes leaving the real couples wondering what they've done with there nite.

Does anyone else seem to think there's a band wagon people are joining and going to clubs for something to do as we think so?

It not that we want to see things happen in the club like all the rooms being taken up but having been to may clubs over the years were finding that people are just drinking and smoking and that's it!

Has anyone else noticed this or are been to judgemental??

would love to hear couples thought's and singles too?

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By *he ProletariatMan
over a year ago

axminster

i have found them to be a bit clicky at times...

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"we've found having been swinging for over 5 years now and been to a fair few swinging club over the country that seems nowadays that is not enough real swingers in the clubs today!

Real swingers we find are not having as much fun these days in club as i think there's to many wannabes leaving the real couples wondering what they've done with there nite.

Does anyone else seem to think there's a band wagon people are joining and going to clubs for something to do as we think so?

Has anyone else noticed this or are been to judgemental??

would love to hear couples thought's and singles too?

want a frank and blunt answer... okay.. here it comes!..

judgemental!!!!!

I hate the term "Real Swingers"... it is one of those phrases that gets people's backs up and the people who use it tend to think of themselves on some sort of higher plain then the rest of us mere mortals.....

just because i am at a club... playing isn't the be all and end all... and to be honest some of the best nights I have experienced have been those chatting to people and the time just flies by!

I don't see chatting to people I have no intention of playing with as "wasted conversation"....

they may walk past you like ships in the night.... but then again... it still takes two!!... it bothers you that much, there is a solution... go up to people and talk to them!!!

brilliant phrase: "if everyone waits on someone else to do something, invariably nothing gets done!"

a club night is what you make of it.... you want to play... go play....

you want to watch... go watch...

Exhibitionists, Voyeurs, BDSM, Gloryholes, Chat with people in the smoking areas.... there is normally something for everyone...

the fixation on people who may approach their swinging in a different way is astonishing... just concentrate on the things you control, rather then trying to control what other people do

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By *amanthaSexCouple
over a year ago

Leicester

"Real swingers we find are not having as much fun these days in club as i think there's to many wannabes leaving the real couples wondering what they've done with there nite."

Really?

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By *rymeplsMan
over a year ago

manchester

If you enjoy yourselves what difference does it make

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we've found having been swinging for over 5 years now and been to a fair few swinging club over the country that seems nowadays that is not enough real swingers in the clubs today!

Real swingers we find are not having as much fun these days in club as i think there's to many wannabes leaving the real couples wondering what they've done with there nite.

Does anyone else seem to think there's a band wagon people are joining and going to clubs for something to do as we think so?

Has anyone else noticed this or are been to judgemental??

would love to hear couples thought's and singles too?

Comgratulations for being 'real swingers.'

For what it's worth, in our opinion, some people will go to a club to socialise, others will go to play, others will go to socialise and play. If the majority are having fun, then who cares? Look after yourselves and make sure you have a great time. Why worry what others are doing? You can't amd won't change it.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"we've found having been swinging for over 5 years now and been to a fair few swinging club over the country that seems nowadays that is not enough real swingers in the clubs today!

Real swingers we find are not having as much fun these days in club as i think there's to many wannabes leaving the real couples wondering what they've done with there nite.

Does anyone else seem to think there's a band wagon people are joining and going to clubs for something to do as we think so?

Has anyone else noticed this or are been to judgemental??

would love to hear couples thought's and singles too?

want a frank and blunt answer... okay.. here it comes!..

judgemental!!!!!

just because i am at a club... playing isn't the be all and end all... and to be honest some of the best nights I have experienced have been those chatting to people and the time just flies by!

I don't see chatting to people I have no intention of playing with as "wasted conversation"....

they may walk past you like ships in the night.... but then again... it still takes two!!... it bothers you that much, there is a solution... go up to people and talk to them!!!

brilliant phrase: "if everyone waits on someone else to do something, invariably nothing gets done!"

a club night is what you make of it.... you want to play... go play....

you want to watch... go watch...

Exhibitionists, Voyeurs, BDSM, Gloryholes, Chat with people in the smoking areas.... there is normally something for everyone...

the fixation on people who may approach their swinging in a different way is astonishing... just concentrate on the things you control, rather then trying to control what other people do

What Fabio said.

We won't have our club behaviour, choices and conversations dictated by anyone other than ourselves.

And if others don't like it............

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By *oowootooCouple
over a year ago

sutton

I love going to clubs. Sometimes it ends up being just me and my man getting naughty and sometimes with others. Personally I like to chat to people first rather than just jumping in, head first.

I never go to a club expecting anything and have never been disappointed.

One of the best nights I had ended up being a social, met an amazing couple who we ended up chatting to and flirting with for months. When we finally got to all play it was fucking awesome

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I love going to clubs. Sometimes it ends up being just me and my man getting naughty and sometimes with others. Personally I like to chat to people first rather than just jumping in, head first.

I never go to a club expecting anything and have never been disappointed.

One of the best nights I had ended up being a social, met an amazing couple who we ended up chatting to and flirting with for months. When we finally got to all play it was fucking awesome

You've just hit the nail on the head the best nights are the social's and not in the clubs that's my whole point!

I think people are having more fun away from clubs because they find themselves not in a swinging club..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love going to clubs. Sometimes it ends up being just me and my man getting naughty and sometimes with others. Personally I like to chat to people first rather than just jumping in, head first.

I never go to a club expecting anything and have never been disappointed.

One of the best nights I had ended up being a social, met an amazing couple who we ended up chatting to and flirting with for months. When we finally got to all play it was fucking awesome

You've just hit the nail on the head the best nights are the social's and not in the clubs that's my whole point!

I think people are having more fun away from clubs because they find themselves not in a swinging club..

I think 'Woowootoo' meant that the great night ended up being a social...in a club! Thus, hitting the nail on the head in that it doesn't all have to be sex sex sex for a great night to be had.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Really confused... Thought that's what Swinging Clubs was all about to have lots of FUN...

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By *ivilizedkinkCouple
over a year ago

harrow

Sorry but what is a "real swinger" ??? Just wondering as after 10 years on the scene we haven't come across this definition before .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry but what is a "real swinger" ??? Just wondering as after 10 years on the scene we haven't come across this definition before ."

Mmmmm this term 'real' .. Bit confused as aren't we all real? We are not made up or artificial.

It must be great to be as important and superior as the OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are the people you speak of. We go to clubs and sit there chatting to each other.

You may think we are not real swingers but the fact is, we are both very shy and not very confident.

You know what it might be. You say over the years people don't seem as into it as before. Maybe it's because you're getting older and attracting less attention.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think Clubs are amazing and each night can be different

we have had brill nights chatting and then nights filled with play

we are all different , and each night is different. Clubs offer a place to meet others maybe to play but also just to meet likeminded people.

As to what is a real swinger, no one knows its like asking what is normal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

didnt this thread already get closed once because it turned into an argument ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We are the people you speak of. We go to clubs and sit there chatting to each other.

You may think we are not real swingers but the fact is, we are both very shy and not very confident.

You know what it might be. You say over the years people don't seem as into it as before. Maybe it's because you're getting older and attracting less attention. "

thats harsh...

However is may be a confidence issue with the more experienced couple very confident with swinging scene and the new comers less so and being seen as stand off ish?

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By *et a roomCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

"didnt this thread already get closed once because it turned into an argument ? "

They posted twice and this has survived. Not sure the OP is still following it though. Things became quite nasty on the other thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We are the people you speak of. We go to clubs and sit there chatting to each other.

You may think we are not real swingers but the fact is, we are both very shy and not very confident.

You know what it might be. You say over the years people don't seem as into it as before. Maybe it's because you're getting older and attracting less attention. "

I have to agree here.... i have been to a few different clubs and i am quite shy so find it difficult to talk to new people (especially if the club is packed... and will get a drink and go sit in the smoking area - as its usually a bit quieter) i do eventually calm down and become quite sociable.

I do talk to people and have played on occasion but i dont expect to play when i do go, its a good way of meeting new people.

And as BaldersandBoss pointed out... what is a "real swinger"???

i am definitely real...

At the end of the day its each to there own...

just have fun your own way...

Sarah xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We are the people you speak of. We go to clubs and sit there chatting to each other.

You may think we are not real swingers but the fact is, we are both very shy and not very confident.

You know what it might be. You say over the years people don't seem as into it as before. Maybe it's because you're getting older and attracting less attention.

thats harsh...

However is may be a confidence issue with the more experienced couple very confident with swinging scene and the new comers less so and being seen as stand off ish? "

Or you turn up at a club, don't play all night because the couples that claim they are looking for bi women have chatted to couples on here, arranged to meet at the said club and spend all night playing with them. That doesn't make my friend and I any less swinger, in fact it was lovely to catch up whilst lazing in the jacuzzi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe the people you see who are chatting dont fancy playing with you !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes it can be difficult talking to people, especially if you don't want to lead them on. Also sometimes lots of the people there have arranged to meet and aren't that interested in other people.

Never really bothers me, just enjoy the facilities.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you get out of a club what you put in - if you are of the mind that you will be disappointed if you don't play with anyone, you are less likely to have a fun night, playing or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why would they be there if they didn't swing? We go to a club to have a laugh and a couple of drinks and meet good people if that's all that happens so be it.

The sex side of it " if it happens it happens" there has to be a connection, we certainly do not have sex for the sake of it.

If you just sit back and wait for it to come to you it won't.

The social side is our thing, don't mean we don't have sex, it has to be with the right people.

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've been to a club in France where it seemed that a lot of people came in, not to swing, but to observe - kind of like 'live porn'.

There was a steady stream of people moving around, pausing and moving on throughout the night in the playing areas and it felt very much like people were visiting a tourist attraction.

I think maybe the original question was suggesting this may be happening in clubs here too sometimes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there are vast numbers of curious people around that like the idea of swinging and like to be surrounded by swingers,enjoy the social aspect of it but they can't actually bring themselves to do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As many regular forumites will be only too aware , our view is the same as the op .

Swinging , and specifically clubs , is a lifestyle which embraces the inclusion of others in sexuel activity . By definition if you don't engage in any sexual activity with others , you simply can't be a swinger .

OK some may be voyeurs and just enjoy watching , and others exhibitionists ( so that sorts those two groups out ! ) .

But if you go to a swinging club , and no one is playing then wtf is going on that couldn't be done in a pub or a vanilla club ?

It used to annoy us until a few months back , then we thought sod it ..... If no one is playing we will start things off with each other ,and invariably from there it livens up .

To be honest , by the time we have arranged and paid for a babysitter , got dressed up and travelled to a club , the last thing we want is a club full of socialising wannabes . So shoot us down , and say the usual ' we prefer quality over quantity ' Or ' swinging is as much about the socialising ' ..... For us its about enjoying sex with others , especially at a club !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel quite depressed now i know we arnt real Swingers, Maybe we will have to bang the first people we meet on sunday evening so we can be bona fide members of the swinging association.

I hope everyones prepared to take one for the Team

Gimp

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hope everyones prepared to take one for the Team

Gimp

That assumes they get an offer to do so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We are the people you speak of. We go to clubs and sit there chatting to each other.

You may think we are not real swingers but the fact is, we are both very shy and not very confident.

You know what it might be. You say over the years people don't seem as into it as before. Maybe it's because you're getting older and attracting less attention.

thats harsh...

However is may be a confidence issue with the more experienced couple very confident with swinging scene and the new comers less so and being seen as stand off ish? "

It wasn't meant to be harsh. That is my opinion and tried hard to put it in a way that was not harsh. If I have offended anyone. Sorry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well that's me told then. I'm not a swinger as I go to clubs to socialise and only want to play with people I'm attracted to. Seems that I should be fucking tom, dick & Harriet wether I fancy them or not and all conversation should be left at the door.

A swinging club atmosphere is totally different to a pub or a club, I'd get arrested or at least thrown out for walking round in a basque & stocking or a towel in one & I'd be forced to wear swimwear in pools, jacuzzis and saunas. But that's not what they are for apparently, they are for fucking only.

Then again as a single a lot of people don't class me as a swinger anyway!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a funny thing to get all angry about!

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By *ivilizedkinkCouple
over a year ago

harrow

Oh ! Bloody hell ! Now we have to totally rethink our life as we are not real

we always thought that the swingers life style was a rich and varied combination of sex,socialising, fun and friendships.and now we find that all we can do is fuck every random person that walks up to us in a club otherwise we are pretend swingers.did realise we weren't aloud to have a preference or taste . WTF!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe the people you see who are chatting dont fancy playing with you !"

Or they were far to busy playing

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By *exxifun5Couple
over a year ago

NORWICH

"As many regular forumites will be only too aware , our view is the same as the op .

OK some may be voyeurs and just enjoy watching , and others exhibitionists ( so that sorts those two groups out ! ) .

But if you go to a swinging club , and no one is playing then wtf is going on that couldn't be done in a pub or a vanilla club ?

It used to annoy us until a few months back , then we thought sod it ..... If no one is playing we will start things off with each other ,and invariably from there it livens up .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just as expected , people suggest that we have no standards and we would fuck anyone !

Far from it - as every playmate we have had is equally as respected as we hope we are .

Clearly not here , by some folk but hey ho .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not enough genuine swingers in clubs or elsewhere, gosh, even on this site. Too easy to join/visit somewhere for titilation rather than to become involved. Swamps the genuine people.

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...

We do most (nearly all) of our swinging in clubs, and we much prefer action packed nights and love to be in the middle of it. So I suppose we are "real swingers".

We know people who go to clubs to socialise and meet other swingers and then arrange a meet for playing at home but they rarely (if ever) play in the club. Are they not "real swingers"? we think they are.

We also know people who regularly go to clubs but only play with someone who they really like and think are right for them, so on some nights they will play, on others they wont. Are they not "real swingers"? We think they are.

We do however meet some people who go to clubs just to see and be seen. We would call them exhibitionists, or voyeurs or even posers, but not "real swingers" but if they play only one time a year (as most at least do) then we would also call them "real swingers"

Going to a club isn't about fucking anyone that just happens to be there, but finding someone who you would like some good horny fun with. We usually do, but even we occasionally have a blank night. So by some definitions we would not be "real swingers"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you may have hit a few raw nerves hence the aggressively subjective replies.

I thought the original op was talking about social interaction, not compulsary sex.

I think society as a whole is less sociable now and suspect that is carrying over into clubs.

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By *orn_To_PerformCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

I understand what the OP means, although even with a lengthy post, they haven't explained themselves very well. We don't go to swinging clubs or parties for a social night. We have plenty of friends in our 'normal' life for that. Of course, we want to talk to others, but that's generally polite conversation to make sure everybody is comfortable. We'd much rather make good use of the time in a play room!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you may have hit a few raw nerves hence the aggressively subjective replies.

I thought the original op was talking about social interaction, not compulsary sex.

I think society as a whole is less sociable now and suspect that is carrying over into clubs.

Those raw nerves are funny to observe though.

I AM A REAL SWINGER

Are you insisting I have to fuck everyone

Roooaaaaarrrr

Maybe you're correct that people's social skills are not quite what they once were

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been to lots of parties and clubs

And things remain the same over the years

Socialising

Then things thin out as people wander off to play - if they wish !

I often socialise

And nothing else

Because I have a right to be picky

But because I am picky I shouldn't have to stop going to a club just to socialise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I understand what the OP means, although even with a lengthy post, they haven't explained themselves very well. We don't go to swinging clubs or parties for a social night. We have plenty of friends in our 'normal' life for that. Of course, we want to talk to others, but that's generally polite conversation to make sure everybody is comfortable. We'd much rather make good use of the time in a play room! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best laid plans change, even for real swingers. For example:

theyve arranged to meet someone specific so want to dedicate time to them;

like myself, they have social meets in clubs so they are in the right environment to both socialise and play if they want to with no obligation;

they recognise a large component of swinging is the build up and flirting;

they recognise its not a brothel and they are not obliged to fuck anyone if they don't want to;

they had every intention of playing but haven't seen anyone they liked (happens to me a lot);

theyve already had some fun and are taking a break;

theyre genuinely nervous and don't wish to feel pressured by real swingers.

Feel free to add your own to the list

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

I get more annoyed by the fact that others people are telling me what a "real swinger" is and dictating to others what they should or shouldn't be doing in any particular setting.....

"I play when I want when I feel comfortable with people I like....."

most important words in that statement... I!!!!

no one else gets to make those decisions... don't like it... tough!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Best laid plans"

The best kind of plans

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So if I go to a club with someone and only okay with them all night...am I a real swinger or not?

For the record I've had 3,4 and 5 suns in clubs and have also been with 6 people in one night, but that's not in every visit.

So would I be classed as a part time swinger?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So if I go to a club with someone and only okay with them all night...am I a real swinger or not?

For the record I've had 3,4 and 5 suns in clubs and have also been with 6 people in one night, but that's not in every visit.

So would I be classed as a part time swinger?

You are who you are

As am I

Whatever anyone else thinks is all bollocks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So if I go to a club with someone and only okay with them all night...am I a real swinger or not?

For the record I've had 3,4 and 5 suns in clubs and have also been with 6 people in one night, but that's not in every visit.

So would I be classed as a part time swinger?

The whole subject is getting silly now ... The op and ourselves are just saying that when a club has everyone in it just drinking and socialising , it can be a tad disappointing if you have gone with the intention of playing .

No one is saying you or anyone else is not a real swinger if you don't play every time you visit a club .

The frustration is when the night becomes no different to a visit to a vanilla club .

This can happen if there is an overall emphasis on socialising , or a lot of newbies , and the atmosphere doesn't lend itself to getting into playing .

We have always said too much chatting beforehand can lead to not feeling in the mood to play !

There seems a distinct division amongst the posterson this thread - all are equally swingers - just having different agendas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we've found having been swinging for over 5 years now and been to a fair few swinging club over the country that seems nowadays that is not enough real swingers in the clubs today!

Real swingers we find are not having as much fun these days in club as i think there's to many wannabes leaving the real couples wondering what they've done with there nite.

Does anyone else seem to think there's a band wagon people are joining and going to clubs for something to do as we think so?

Has anyone else noticed this or are been to judgemental??

would love to hear couples thought's and singles too?

It might be the way you dress/present yourselves if you are not getting the attention you got in the past.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have always said too much chatting beforehand can lead to not feeling in the mood to play !"

But surely some conversation is required, or is it just turn up get shagging you prefer?

We have been visitors in some clubs where on arrival everyone is already chatting in groups, and we have been blanked, only way to get into a conversation a lot of the time is to go and join the smokers. As we don't smoke that ploy is a little obvious.

Think the self declared real swingers need to make moe effort in the all important first hour then you may find more shyer people ready when you say the immortal words "want to play?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

maybe that's the downfall? At my local club we advise people go to without any expectations then you're never disappointed

or just play with yourselves if sex is that important to making your night out worthwhile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have always said too much chatting beforehand can lead to not feeling in the mood to play !

But surely some conversation is required, or is it just turn up get shagging you prefer?

Think the self declared real swingers need to make moe effort in the all important first hour then you may find more shyer people ready when you say the immortal words "want to play?" "

Of course a bit of a chat is usually good to see if there is a connection .

But it's not always necessary - many a time a glance , a smile and a play has been really horny too !

Each of us has our own style , and I fully take your point regarding the fact that in a new club , newbies can find it difficult to engage with established groups . If we fancy a new arrival , we make a point of leaving the group to introduce ourselves . Sometimes this leads to a chat and later a play , other times just a social , depending on the chemistry . We never put pressure on anyone , and have a good reputation introducing newbies to the carnal delights of swinging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The ironic thing of this is, this post kind of discourages people who are genuine swingers who are thinking of visiting clubs...

It's something that no couple can change, maybe if someone felt strongly I'd suggest meeting a few good couples / singles, putting the money towards an apartment / hotel and have a party - problem solved??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not enough genuine swingers in clubs or elsewhere, gosh, even on this site. Too easy to join/visit somewhere for titilation rather than to become involved. Swamps the genuine people."

What makes a person 'genuine'?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What the fuck makes someone who isn't a swinger take ID, pay membership then pay an entrance fee go to into a swingers club if they are not swingers??? Is it me or is this thread seriously fucked up!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What the fuck makes someone who isn't a swinger take ID, pay membership then pay an entrance fee go to into a swingers club if they are not swingers??? Is it me or is this thread seriously fucked up!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes to what ever he says because he is hot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What the fuck is it about being called a swinger that makes people so angry if somebody they don't know dares to suggest they might not call them a swinger?

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By *ivilizedkinkCouple
over a year ago

harrow

"I get more annoyed by the fact that others people are telling me what a "real swinger" is and dictating to others what they should or shouldn't be doing in any particular setting.....

"I play when I want when I feel comfortable with people I like....."

most important words in that statement... I!!!!

no one else gets to make those decisions... don't like it... tough!!!!

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The ironic thing of this is, this post kind of discourages people who are genuine swingers who are thinking of visiting clubs..."

It's certainly put me off ever attending Swingfest due to some of the views expressed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The ironic thing of this is, this post kind of discourages people who are genuine swingers who are thinking of visiting clubs...

It's certainly put me off ever attending Swingfest due to some of the views expressed."

What is Swingfest ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does this mean we're not real swingers, because we never put our keys in a bowl?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are miserable virgins

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does this mean we're not real swingers, because we never put our keys in a bowl?

Don't recall anyone mentioning keys in a bowl , have you been to a club where this happens ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does this mean we're not real swingers, because we never put our keys in a bowl?

Don't recall anyone mentioning keys in a bowl , have you been to a club where this happens ?"

You mean you haven't?

Fake

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By *extoysareusCouple
over a year ago

kinky heaven

Seems to be too many people on here trying to control what other people get up to and to label them as such

Seems divide and conquer is truly happening

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does this mean we're not real swingers, because we never put our keys in a bowl?

Don't recall anyone mentioning keys in a bowl , have you been to a club where this happens ?

You mean you haven't?

Fake

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seems more like people getting angry about labelling themselves!

I couldn't give the teensiest toss what anybody else wants to call me. I like clubs and I like sex in my own way. Whatever anybody wants to call it is their issue, not mine.

I do think there was a potentially interesting debate about the 'swingers tourism/voyeurism' thing, but instead people prefer to dive in and make angry noises and be all indignated etc. etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seems to be too many people on here trying to control what other people get up to and to label them as such

Seems divide and conquer is truly happening "

Don't agree with this statement at all .

Simply differing opinions and thoughts as to what hoes on ( or not ) in clubs .

Certainly not trying to conquer anyone here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The ironic thing of this is, this post kind of discourages people who are genuine swingers who are thinking of visiting clubs...

It's certainly put me off ever attending Swingfest due to some of the views expressed.

What is Swingfest ?"

Blonde moment, I meant swingfields.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Keep Politics Out Of Swinging.

Do want you want and don't let others pressure you to do what you don't want to do.

WYWA - Wank Your Worries Away

If you don't like it, try it...You Might Like It...

Whatever you choose, the answer is correct, because you chose it.

End of.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We go to clubs often, sometimes we play sometimes we don't. we have met lots of people we enjoy spending time with either playing or just chatting at the bar. Real swingers are people who enjoy what they do when they do it and who they do it with. And if anyone tried to dictate what we did and when we do it then they truly do not understand the life style. Its about having fun however you want to and people who don't understand that would not be welcome in the clubs we use.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

First time at a swinger club I didn't do anything with others except for the partner I was with. Got blanked by other the other people. Second time last week i again only played with the couple I had arrived with. What defines a swinger? I thought I was getting into the lifestyle quite well being a single fem. But guess not as I never played with anyone I didn't already know within the club.

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By *asperthedogCouple
over a year ago

midlands

Agree with the OP. As much as most on here disagree, I think they're right. One of the reasons why we like the Private Club, mainly "real Swingers" there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The ironic thing of this is, this post kind of discourages people who are genuine swingers who are thinking of visiting clubs...

It's certainly put me off ever attending Swingfest due to some of the views expressed.

What is Swingfest ?

Blonde moment, I meant swingfields."

I don't know why you be put off by us as we aren't going to Swingfields !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with the OP. As much as most on here disagree, I think they're right. One of the reasons why we like the Private Club, mainly "real Swingers" there."

Out of interest what makes the customers at Private Club more "real" than those at any other club?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with the OP. As much as most on here disagree, I think they're right. One of the reasons why we like the Private Club, mainly "real Swingers" there.

Out of interest what makes the customers at Private Club more "real" than those at any other club?"

It's a sex club isn't, mainly aimed at single men and hostesses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with the OP. As much as most on here disagree, I think they're right. One of the reasons why we like the Private Club, mainly "real Swingers" there."

Often thought the Private club would suit us too , really must get up there soon

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

Agree with the OP. As much as most on here disagree, I think they're right. One of the reasons why we like the Private Club, mainly "real Swingers" there.

Out of interest what makes the customers at Private Club more "real" than those at any other club?"

isn't "private club" from what I remember in the past, one of those clubs what was alledged to have paid women there.......;-)

more to the point... still waiting of a defination on what a "real swinger" is....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with the OP. As much as most on here disagree, I think they're right. One of the reasons why we like the Private Club, mainly "real Swingers" there.

Out of interest what makes the customers at Private Club more "real" than those at any other club?"

Because. They are "customers" rather than attendees? Maybe I'm wrong but isn't that club mre likely to be paying the female attendees/guests?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never read such a load of bollocks ... been to Pleasures & Eureka & found plenty of swingers at both.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with the OP. As much as most on here disagree, I think they're right. One of the reasons why we like the Private Club, mainly "real Swingers" there.

Out of interest what makes the customers at Private Club more "real" than those at any other club?

Because. They are "customers" rather than attendees? Maybe I'm wrong but isn't that club mre likely to be paying the female attendees/guests?

I got that impression when I looked at their website. That was ages ago though - but I thought it was some sort of 'gentlemans club', so we've never tried it.

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By *asperthedogCouple
over a year ago

midlands

if you can handle the Private club, then I'd say you're a hard core swinger, you've seen it, done it, and bought the T shirt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if you can handle the Private club, then I'd say you're a hard core swinger, you've seen it, done it, and bought the T shirt."

Oh please...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if you can handle the Private club, then I'd say you're a hard core swinger, you've seen it, done it, and bought the T shirt."

Isn't it a bit ironic on a discussion about 'real swingers' to promote a club that pays women to attend? Or am I wrong on that?

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

You know, when I go to a club I don't spend my time watching others to make sure they visit the playrooms a requisite number of times. I am waylaying single men for rampant nookie. I don't consider it a good night til my hair looks like I've been dragged through a hedge backwards. Now I know why there are always a few couples sitting together whispering to each other - they're judging the rest of us for not being 'real swingers'. It's all so clear now!

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By *asperthedogCouple
over a year ago

midlands

"if you can handle the Private club, then I'd say you're a hard core swinger, you've seen it, done it, and bought the T shirt.

Oh please...

trust me, you wouldn't like it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if you can handle the Private club, then I'd say you're a hard core swinger, you've seen it, done it, and bought the T shirt.

Isn't it a bit ironic on a discussion about 'real swingers' to promote a club that pays women to attend? Or am I wrong on that?"

In fairness not all women are paid hostesses. And I believe that the hostesses have the right to say no.

But to me, how it markets itself and the clientele it targets itself at is far nearer to prostitution than any club I've been to. And that's not a criticism, if it suits all attending who am I to criticicise. But i will laugh in the face of anyone that tries to convince me that the ethos of the club is what "real" swinging is. If it is, then maybe all those single guys on here who think that this site is going to be a source of ever horny women willing to shag anything are maybe on to something

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if you can handle the Private club, then I'd say you're a hard core swinger, you've seen it, done it, and bought the T shirt.

Oh please...

trust me, you wouldn't like it"

Do you have to be so patronising?

No we wouldn't, but tell me how that makes us any less real or hardcore?

Or is it a case of pure elitism and how you play is the only way?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if you can handle the Private club, then I'd say you're a hard core swinger, you've seen it, done it, and bought the T shirt.

Oh please...

trust me, you wouldn't like it"

We would , and can't wait to get the t shirt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if you can handle the Private club, then I'd say you're a hard core swinger, you've seen it, done it, and bought the T shirt.

Isn't it a bit ironic on a discussion about 'real swingers' to promote a club that pays women to attend? Or am I wrong on that?

In fairness not all women are paid hostesses. And I believe that the hostesses have the right to say no.

I've never been but it looks and sounds like a brothel (which is why I've never been). Doesn't sound at all like a swingers club.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The very reason we don.t go to clubs. . . . Easier for us to decide in the comfort of our own home if others are for us. . . . And if not we move quietly along! !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The very reason we don.t go to clubs. . . . Easier for us to decide in the comfort of our own home if others are for us. . . . And if not we move quietly along! !!!!"

Where do you move along to - the dining room?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The very reason we don.t go to clubs. . . . Easier for us to decide in the comfort of our own home if others are for us. . . . And if not we move quietly along! !!!!

Where do you move along to - the dining room?

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By *asperthedogCouple
over a year ago

midlands

The Private club is very full on with lots of single men. If you can spend Saturday night in there and have relaxed, enjoyable night, I'd say you can handle any situation in swinging. Perhaps go and test yourself, see how you measure up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The Private club is very full on with lots of single men. If you can spend Saturday night in there and have relaxed, enjoyable night, I'd say you can handle any situation in swinging. Perhaps go and test yourself, see how you measure up

But what if our preference is a 4 sum ideally with plenty of bi action?

Or is being gangbanged, because it is your preference, what constitutes "real" swinging?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The very reason we don.t go to clubs. . . . Easier for us to decide in the comfort of our own home if others are for us. . . . And if not we move quietly along! !!!!

Where do you move along to - the dining room?

Or the kitchen over the washing machine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We eagerly look forward to our first visit .

We love the fact it isn't couples only and relish the opportunity for Sabrina to get busy with lots of single guys

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By *asperthedogCouple
over a year ago

midlands

real swinging perhaps not, but i'd say their hardcore swingers. I don't really like a gangbang to be fair, don't really like the help. Like the idea of some of the women being paid hostesses. Look at it a bit like the difference between ameuter and pro boxing, if you want to get in the ring with the pro's, you'd better know what you're doing if you want to impress them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never felt the need to 'measure up' or 'test myself' as a swinger - I do it for fun. Doesn't seem like much of a test anyhow if people need to be paid to give you company.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"real swinging perhaps not, but i'd say their hardcore swingers. I don't really like a gangbang to be fair, don't really like the help. Like the idea of some of the women being paid hostesses. Look at it a bit like the difference between ameuter and pro boxing, if you want to get in the ring with the pro's, you'd better know what you're doing if you want to impress them

Oh ok - I'm on a very different wavelength. You mean they're 'professionals' in every sense

Let me guess - you're the best they ever had?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In fairness we have seen and taken part in things at BDSM nights that would get us a ban if we mentioned them on the forums. We really don;t need to prove how hardcore we are...

But each to their own, if straight play in a club with paid hostesses and men who treat it like a brothel is your definition of hardcore play then knock yourself out (like my boxing analogy)...

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

If you are in a club where most women are hookers - who do you need to impress?

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By *asperthedogCouple
over a year ago

midlands

In fairness we have seen and taken part in things at BDSM nights that would get us a ban if we mentioned them on the forums. We really don;t need to prove how hardcore we are...

But each to their own, if straight play in a club with paid hostesses and men who treat it like a brothel is your definition of hardcore play then knock yourself out (like my boxing analogy)..."

I'm sorry, I didn't realise you we're so hardcore you can't mention it. Forgive me

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By *asperthedogCouple
over a year ago

midlands

If you are in a club where most women are hookers - who do you need to impress?

go try, if they remember you for the right reasons the second time, you'll have done well

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

If you are in a club where most women are hookers - who do you need to impress?

go try, if they remember you for the right reasons the second time, you'll have done well

If I'm paying for sex, why would I care if they remember it?

If one is paying, one can be as good or as bad as they like..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you are in a club where most women are hookers - who do you need to impress?

go try, if they remember you for the right reasons the second time, you'll have done well

You're so amusing. Really really really funny. Swingers Of The Century.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Follow the green arrow.....someone clearly has a chip here...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We only do gangbangs... so don't really consider ourselves swingers...

but we like to socialise and talk.

But to be quite frank, we don't give a damn what you all do.

Just be happy with what you do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Follow the green arrow.....someone clearly has a chip here..."

Need some more chips and some fish, plus a little curry sauce....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well thanks for the great replys ive picked up some great tips happy swinging guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

havent read the whole thread, but guessing that because some have knocked you back in your advances, then you are terming them to be 'not real swingers' whatever that may be.

just because people arent interested in talking to you personally, doesnt mean they have no interest in talking to others.

we have found some in clubs ignorant, tetchy and dare i say cliquey, at times, but then, you will get the regulars at these places, then you get the newbies that go every now and then, so have to start fresh every time.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"havent read the whole thread, but guessing that because some have knocked you back in your advances, then you are terming them to be 'not real swingers' whatever that may be.

just because people arent interested in talking to you personally, doesnt mean they have no interest in talking to others.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"havent read the whole thread, but guessing that because some have knocked you back in your advances, then you are terming them to be 'not real swingers' whatever that may be.

just because people arent interested in talking to you personally, doesnt mean they have no interest in talking to others.

"
knocked bk how do u know lol we always get knocked backed and never have any fun pmsl can u advise us how get fun guys ?

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

I do think swinging is what you make of it.

I think the difference between swinging and dating is the cross matching.

For example, if we use the general guy and girl trying to hook up. One has to like the other and the same in return. If not, then move on and try again etc.

In our scenario.

Liz needs to like him and her?

Mark need to like her.

So that's 3 so far... Before you even start talking to the other couple.

Then if she does not like Mark or Liz

Or he does not like Liz You can see it's far more tricky.

Liz will often say, I should just go up to someone and start talking to them, but just because I maybe interested. Liz may not. In the end I can understand why people don't just get up and start talking flirting as they don't want to make assumptions about their partner being into the same couple.

Once you get over that initial hurdle of talking to someone, whether you are interested in swinging with them or not, it does make the whole night more enjoyable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"havent read the whole thread, but guessing that because some have knocked you back in your advances, then you are terming them to be 'not real swingers' whatever that may be.

just because people arent interested in talking to you personally, doesnt mean they have no interest in talking to others.

knocked bk how do u know lol we always get knocked backed and never have any fun pmsl can u advise us how get fun guys ?

cant help you.

we arent real swingers as we dont go to clubs to jump on the first things to show any interest.

much prefer to sit back and take in the atmosphere.

if we do anything, we do, if not, we dont

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Clubs have changed,

well OK the people in clubs have changed,

There is good and bad in that.

Swinging is not what it was 5 years ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Clubs have changed,

well OK the people in clubs have changed,

There is good and bad in that.

Swinging is not what it was 5 years ago "
.

What was it like 5 years ago?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Clubs have changed,

well OK the people in clubs have changed,

There is good and bad in that.

Swinging is not what it was 5 years ago .

What was it like 5 years ago?"

Oh, you know, people were much younger, probably by about five years most of them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Clubs have changed,

well OK the people in clubs have changed,

There is good and bad in that.

Swinging is not what it was 5 years ago .

What was it like 5 years ago?

Oh, you know, people were much younger, probably by about five years most of them

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By *uietlyKinkyUsCouple
over a year ago

midlands

I agree the scene was. Very different 5 years ago.

But then we were all sat discussing this the other evening.

The scene has always changed slightly & swingers used to travel to venues. Now cheap ass imitation clubs have popped up everywhere & its just not the same anymore

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"havent read the whole thread, but guessing that because some have knocked you back in your advances, then you are terming them to be 'not real swingers' whatever that may be.

just because people arent interested in talking to you personally, doesnt mean they have no interest in talking to others.

knocked bk how do u know lol we always get knocked backed and never have any fun pmsl can u advise us how get fun guys ?

Yeah, don't go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only time I have been to a club I was put off due to the undercurrent feeling that if you are in a swingers club you'll fuck anyone who shows interest, because that's what happens at a club. I assumed clubs were not for me (despite really looking forward to going) since I wasn't prepared to be everyone's play thing.

I'd much prefer to go, chat with other swingers and if I click with someone then head off and play in a room. If it doesn't happen I don't want any pressure.

Maybe I'm not a real swinger though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why do people think that if you go to a club you will fuck anything ?

That's so far from the truth ... its no different to looking for a meet on here , except you actually get to see and chat with potential meets in the flesh .

And instead of arranging when you will play , you _et a room and it's all good .

If you don't fancy someone , you don't play .

Simple .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The only time I have been to a club I was put off due to the undercurrent feeling that if you are in a swingers club you'll fuck anyone who shows interest, because that's what happens at a club. I assumed clubs were not for me (despite really looking forward to going) since I wasn't prepared to be everyone's play thing.

I'd much prefer to go, chat with other swingers and if I click with someone then head off and play in a room. If it doesn't happen I don't want any pressure.

Maybe I'm not a real swinger though

In this case we are not real swingers, and dont know real swingers either, because a swinging club should have NO pressure to play with anyone.

We go with single females, and they have just chatted and not played. Other times they have gone off with someone to a private room or if no private rooms are available swapped details for here to meet later.

Only do what you are comfortable with when you are comfortable to do it.

Avoid gb's and gg's nights though, so there is an expectation for a 'yes' then, which we found out to our personal cost. Now we know better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do people think that if you go to a club you will fuck anything ?

That's so far from the truth ... its no different to looking for a meet on here , except you actually get to see and chat with potential meets in the flesh .

And instead of arranging when you will play , you _et a room and it's all good .

If you don't fancy someone , you don't play .

Simple .

thats what the OP seems to be saying, though.

those that go to clubs, but have no intention of putting out with anyone or everyone, arent real swingers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But there's a big difference between going to a club with no intention of playing with anyone at all , and the assumption that if you go you will play with anyone .

We go to clubs at least once a week , and obviously play if there's anyone that takes our fancy .

We wouldn't dream of going if we had no intention of playing at all , but if there's no one we fancy we don't play .

What annoys me is the assumption we would take one for the team ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been going to clubs on and off around the country for the past 8 years as a couple and single so find it so hard to generalise. So many great nights on a friendly and sexual basis then others where people are stand offish or rude. I put it down to there are some lovely like minded people who really love swinging then there are others who are just rude or critical. Anyway ... I am still enjoying myself

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By *orthwest_cplCouple
over a year ago

Stretford

We've been going to clubs very regularly for 14 years. Without doubt the attitude of people who go to clubs has changed in that time.

When we first started going almost all people went with the intention of playing at the club, mostly with other people. Very few people went solely to socialise.

Our impression is that many people now going to clubs use them as a place where they can have a night out in their underwear and then shag their partners at home.

The argument about what is a 'real' swinger is pointless and deflects from the OP point that clubs are no longer places where the majority of punters are actively looking to play.

Not saying this is a good or bad thing but just stating the impression we have from a long time on the scene and an awful lot of different clubs.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We've been going to clubs very regularly for 14 years. Without doubt the attitude of people who go to clubs has changed in that time.

When we first started going almost all people went with the intention of playing at the club, mostly with other people. Very few people went solely to socialise.

Our impression is that many people now going to clubs use them as a place where they can have a night out in their underwear and then shag their partners at home.

The argument about what is a 'real' swinger is pointless and deflects from the OP point that clubs are no longer places where the majority of punters are actively looking to play.

Not saying this is a good or bad thing but just stating the impression we have from a long time on the scene and an awful lot of different clubs."

You no what thats exactly the response ive been looking for since starting the thread! thank god were not the ones that feel the same...horrrayyyyy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But there's a big difference between going to a club with no intention of playing with anyone at all , and the assumption that if you go you will play with anyone .

We go to clubs at least once a week , and obviously play if there's anyone that takes our fancy .

We wouldn't dream of going if we had no intention of playing at all , but if there's no one we fancy we don't play .

What annoys me is the assumption we would take one for the team ....

suppose we kind of differ slightly as we have never been with the sole intention of playing with someone, as then you probably would end up 'taking one for the team' as it were, but rather with the open minded attitude that, if the situation arises, we are more than open to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't differ at all !

If as you say , the situation arises you are more than open to it with mutual attraction .

That's exactly how it is for us too .

However , the op and a few others are rightly suggesting that there are a lot of people attending clubs , with no intention of playing , no matter what .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We don't differ at all !

If as you say , the situation arises you are more than open to it with mutual attraction .

That's exactly how it is for us too .

However , the op and a few others are rightly suggesting that there are a lot of people attending clubs , with no intention of playing , no matter what .

ah ok, i read you wrong then lol.

but, a question arises, how does the OP, or anyone, know that all these people have no interest in playing with anyone at all?

just because the OP doesnt interest them, or anyone there at the time, doesnt mean they arent like us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

After reading some of the comments on here it has confirmed why we don't think clubs would be right for us.

Surely you are free to do whatever you want when going to a club without fear of being castigated as not a 'Real Swinger', for exercising your right not to play.

Surely there has to be some element of desire for the evening to be pleasurable. You shouldn't be expected to fuck everyone there just because it is a swinging club and the other members expect this as they are 'Real Swingers' and you don't want to let the other club goers down.

This is just ridiculous and wouldn't happen, or be expected from anyone, when having an evening out with your partner anywhere in the 'Real World', (whatever that is...).

Last time we checked we were allowed to choose the meal we wanted to eat, the film we wanted to watch, the band we wanted to see rather than having our choices dictated to us by the other patrons.

It's got to be about choice... swinging for us is about having mutual fun, enjoying glorious moments with others who you know are enjoying your company too. Would be awful to look into someone's eyes, whilst sharing an intimate moment, for them to look back at you with eyes glazed over, knowing that you were not the object of their desire and that they were going through the motions just because they didn't want to have to pay a babysitter for nothing.

So if you are under any pressure to fuck everyone, just because they have turned up on the same night as you, then clubs are definitely not for us.

But each to their own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"After reading some of the comments on here it has confirmed why we don't think clubs would be right for us.

Surely you are free to do whatever you want when going to a club without fear of being castigated as not a 'Real Swinger', for exercising your right not to play.

This is just ridiculous and wouldn't happen, or be expected from anyone, when having an evening out with your partner anywhere in the 'Real World', (whatever that is...).

Last time we checked we were allowed to choose the meal we wanted to eat, the film we wanted to watch, the band we wanted to see rather than having our choices dictated to us by the other patrons.

So if you are under any pressure to fuck everyone, just because they have turned up on the same night as you, then clubs are definitely not for us.

But each to their own"

Excellent post

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"After reading some of the comments on here it has confirmed why we don't think clubs would be right for us.

Surely you are free to do whatever you want when going to a club without fear of being castigated as not a 'Real Swinger', for exercising your right not to play.

This is just ridiculous and wouldn't happen, or be expected from anyone, when having an evening out with your partner anywhere in the 'Real World', (whatever that is...).

Last time we checked we were allowed to choose the meal we wanted to eat, the film we wanted to watch, the band we wanted to see rather than having our choices dictated to us by the other patrons.

So if you are under any pressure to fuck everyone, just because they have turned up on the same night as you, then clubs are definitely not for us.

But each to their own"

You do have choice!! The OP's views are just his. From my experience people in clubs are generally respectful. I think the OP's views are definitely in the minority. I woukdnt let that effect your decision to attend one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We often take newbies to clubs , and the mist common question we get is ' have you played with everyone here then ? '

So there is a real misconception amongst non club goers as the answer is a resounding no !

Like everyone who regularly attends clubs , we play with those who we are attracted to .

And in response to Venus and Hercules .... yes we agree that there is no way of knowing the answer on that point

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok my fresh point of view is this

I'm going to my first club tonight I was going on my own but was treated like a social pariah for doing so, as such I'm taking a FB with me, many times over the last few days while talking to people about the club etc I've heard the line oh I or we never swing at clubs I or we go for the social element, now that's up to them but frankly if everyone went with this attitude it would just be a poorly lit disco, so I get the OP's point. Of course everyone gets to choose who or what they do up to a point in life depending on your income and social standing and a swingers club is where everyone has a choice in what they do xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have attended alot of clubs in and around the Midlands and the Northwest.

Sometimes we go to play with others, sometimes we go for great kinky sex out of our bedroom and just to use there facilities.

Sometimes we go to get out of the house and use there wet area's, and don't have a intention to play but if the right couple came along we would.

Sometimes we use the club to meet others that we havn't met before in the hope of play in a safe and less pressured situation.

We have noticed a difference on the whole scene and they are many different reasons for that.

But guess what we move with the times and do what makes us happy and don't worry anymore if we fit in to a certain label or bracket.

But saying that we dont class our selves as swingers any more anyway we are kinksters having lots of different kink what ever it is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"After reading some of the comments on here it has confirmed why we don't think clubs would be right for us.

Surely you are free to do whatever you want when going to a club without fear of being castigated as not a 'Real Swinger', for exercising your right not to play.

This is just ridiculous and wouldn't happen, or be expected from anyone, when having an evening out with your partner anywhere in the 'Real World', (whatever that is...).

Last time we checked we were allowed to choose the meal we wanted to eat, the film we wanted to watch, the band we wanted to see rather than having our choices dictated to us by the other patrons.

So if you are under any pressure to fuck everyone, just because they have turned up on the same night as you, then clubs are definitely not for us.

But each to their own

Excellent post

I have never been to a club and felt as though anybody believed they had a right to fuck me.

I have never been to a club and cared one bit whether anybody else wished to categorise me as a swinger or anything else.

I have been to lots of clubs and had lots of good times. I wish I could go more.

I read a lot of nonsense on here by people assuming a great deal based on not very much.

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By *am789Man
over a year ago

Preston

Do People go to a restaurant and just look at the menu, go to a concert and listen to their headphones etc etc

There are so few clubs these days were people consistently swing.

And yes we know women/couples aren't bound to play with every one but come on time wasters are bound to get "real swingers" frustrated.

I've experienced many glorified wife swappers wandering around "SWINGERS clubs" looking down their noses at every one putting a downer on the night to mention.

Sadly it the way things are.

Real swingers I salute you xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mm Jaydees last night

The above post applies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do People go to a restaurant and just look at the menu, go to a concert and listen to their headphones etc etc

There are so few clubs these days were people consistently swing.

And yes we know women/couples aren't bound to play with every one but come on time wasters are bound to get "real swingers" frustrated.

I've experienced many glorified wife swappers wandering around "SWINGERS clubs" looking down their noses at every one putting a downer on the night to mention.

Sadly it the way things are.

Real swingers I salute you xxx

How is someone who attends a club a timewaster?

We don't go to clubs but surely those that do are not wasting anyone's time. You contradict yourself by stating their is an element of choice yet state that if people choose not to play then they are timewasting and pissing off the 'Real Swingers'

And as for 'consistently' swinging, are you insinuating that people have to be fucking constantly otherwise they are not 'Real Swingers' and are then to be considered timewasters?

You comments about glorified wife swappers seems a little revealing too. Could it be that any woman who exercises her right not to play with you, and subsequently, you believe, is looking down their nose at you, is in fact not attracted to you enough to play with you.

Everything within the whole gambit of swinging hinges on one thing. Choice. Who are you to say that unless they behave the way you expect them to they are timewasters, not real swingers and just glorified wife swappers.

Anyone is free, for whatever reasons, to be free to choose when, where and with whom they play. It seems you are the one looking down your nose at those who choose not to play with you.

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

"Do People go to a restaurant and just look at the menu, go to a concert and listen to their headphones etc etc

There are so few clubs these days were people consistently swing.

And yes we know women/couples aren't bound to play with every one but come on time wasters are bound to get "real swingers" frustrated.

I've experienced many glorified wife swappers wandering around "SWINGERS clubs" looking down their noses at every one putting a downer on the night to mention.

Sadly it the way things are.

Real swingers I salute you xxx

How is someone who attends a club a timewaster?

And as for 'consistently' swinging, are you insinuating that people have to be fucking constantly otherwise they are not 'Real Swingers' and are then to be considered timewasters?

Anyone is free, for whatever reasons, to be free to choose when, where and with whom they play. It seems you are the one looking down your nose at those who choose not to play with you."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do People go to a restaurant and just look at the menu, go to a concert and listen to their headphones etc etc

There are so few clubs these days were people consistently swing.

And yes we know women/couples aren't bound to play with every one but come on time wasters are bound to get "real swingers" frustrated.

I've experienced many glorified wife swappers wandering around "SWINGERS clubs" looking down their noses at every one putting a downer on the night to mention.

Sadly it the way things are.

Real swingers I salute you xxx

What is it that is frustrating to you? That somebody doesn't want to fuck you?

'Real swingers' know the reality that not everybody wants to fuck them - even in a club or at a party. And what is a 'glorified wife swapper?'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do People go to a restaurant and just look at the menu, go to a concert and listen to their headphones etc etc

There are so few clubs these days were people consistently swing.

And yes we know women/couples aren't bound to play with every one but come on time wasters are bound to get "real swingers" frustrated.

I've experienced many glorified wife swappers wandering around "SWINGERS clubs" looking down their noses at every one putting a downer on the night to mention.

Sadly it the way things are.

Real swingers I salute you xxx

well, vicariously, you havent a leg to stand on, as a single person, you also do not fall under the banner of a 'real swinger' so what the hell are you doing at a swingers club?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do People go to a restaurant and just look at the menu, go to a concert and listen to their headphones etc etc

There are so few clubs these days were people consistently swing.

And yes we know women/couples aren't bound to play with every one but come on time wasters are bound to get "real swingers" frustrated.

I've experienced many glorified wife swappers wandering around "SWINGERS clubs" looking down their noses at every one putting a downer on the night to mention.

Sadly it the way things are.

Real swingers I salute you xxx

well, vicariously, you havent a leg to stand on, as a single person, you also do not fall under the banner of a 'real swinger' so what the hell are you doing at a swingers club?"

Says the "Soft" swop swinger...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Wow is this interesting thread still going lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if i go to a club i go to socialise to and if someone i like and converse and the connection is there GREAT

but i woulnt just go with anyone just as i am a swinger

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By *.nottsbloke..Man
over a year ago

the vale

Threds wit no enuf good spieling iritate me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do People go to a restaurant and just look at the menu, go to a concert and listen to their headphones etc etc

There are so few clubs these days were people consistently swing.

And yes we know women/couples aren't bound to play with every one but come on time wasters are bound to get "real swingers" frustrated.

I've experienced many glorified wife swappers wandering around "SWINGERS clubs" looking down their noses at every one putting a downer on the night to mention.

Sadly it the way things are.

Real swingers I salute you xxx

well, vicariously, you havent a leg to stand on, as a single person, you also do not fall under the banner of a 'real swinger' so what the hell are you doing at a swingers club?

Says the "Soft" swop swinger..."

whats that got to do with the price of eggs?

in the 'age old' explanation of what a swinger is, its wife swapping.

guess what, we have a wife to swap, no matter the level of which that swap is.

a single, whether male or female, doesnt.

so, 'real swingers' can only be couples (going by the proper historical version of the passtime)

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