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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Does anyone else get more nervous at having a social meet than getting their clothes off? I'm far more comfortable getting naked and playing instead of sat chatting over dinner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does anyone else get more nervous at having a social meet than getting their clothes off? I'm far more comfortable getting naked and playing instead of sat chatting over dinner "
yeah I'm the same lol I go shy at socials haha xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're the opposite, would rather get naked n naughty with people we'd met socially beforehand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love socials and defo a must before any fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always have a social meet first to see if there is a click, I am a bit nervous but everyone says I never show it and am really good at relaxing people..... My job has taught me something that comes in handy after working hours lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Phew thank god it's not just me then...was thinking i was bit weird being nervous at social haha and no nerves getting kit off.

Hr n half to go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does anyone else get more nervous at having a social meet than getting their clothes off? I'm far more comfortable getting naked and playing instead of sat chatting over dinner "

We won't have dinner with Someone till we have had sex at least three times I know it's old fashioned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we get nervous either way anyway lol.

OP, cant see how you would be more nervous when having a drink rather than shaggin, unless you can shag better than drink lol

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By *ombshellWoman
over a year ago

islington

loves the social side of swinging

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"we get nervous either way anyway lol.

OP, cant see how you would be more nervous when having a drink rather than shaggin, unless you can shag better than drink lol"

No idea...just the way i am i guess

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By *picyspiregirlCouple
over a year ago

chesterfield

We get nervous before socials but soon calm down once we have started chatting.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Mmm was all good, nerves went within five mins

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does anyone else get more nervous at having a social meet than getting their clothes off? I'm far more comfortable getting naked and playing instead of sat chatting over dinner

We won't have dinner with Someone till we have had sex at least three times I know it's old fashioned

"

how i met your mother reference?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like a chat with a prospective partner. I love the moment you realise the attraction is mutual and you know where it is heading

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We're the opposite, would rather get naked n naughty with people we'd met socially beforehand. "

Ditto

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By *oveSlutForUseCouple
over a year ago

Brighton


"Does anyone else get more nervous at having a social meet than getting their clothes off? I'm far more comfortable getting naked and playing instead of sat chatting over dinner "

Yes, we have no wish to attend such things as socials. They add an extra dimension that we feel doesn't need adding, to this scene. Socialising is built around groups of people who have something specific in common. Sex is not under this definition, if it were, we'd have 5 billion people at socials.

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By *eddonistikMan
over a year ago

Manchester

I think this splits into two camps of definition.

To some, myself included it means where a largeish group of swingers of all the many varieties get together in a club or pub, drink and chat. Some may end up playing somewhere that night with others, others not. Sex isn't the main purpose of the evening, more mixing with like minded people, a chance to let your hair down. I've only ever been to ones in Manchester, all of which have been in the Village where all sorts of shennanagins can go on without people batting an eyelid.

To others it means meeting others, couples, singles whatever in smaller numbers, maybe just two couples, a couple and a single or maybe two single people meeting up. At this it's more like an ordinary 'first date' in the 'conventional world.' Just getting to know each other before deciding on whether to have a meet where you will have sexual contact.

Some prefer to meet up and get down to fun early on in the meet, they know before the meet that sex is pretty much on the agenda / menu. I certainly wouldn't class these as socials and don't think many or any others would either.

I've been to the first type quite a few times, some on my own, others with a partner. Sometimes sexual encounters have occurred, sometimes not. I have had a small number number of the second group, mostly it's ended up with sex in one form or anther happening on the same night. The times when it's been a purely social meet with sex to perhaps follow on a subsequent meet, I think it's only once that there has been a second meet with sex.

To my mind I think it comes down to what I consider should be the main rule of swinging, 'whatever floats your boat.' Personally I'm keener on meets where all parties expect to have sex or sexual contact at that meet. This view is possibly explained by the fact that I host a few gang bangs, I'd hate to have a room full of horny men and the woman to say no I don't think I'll bother. Personally I find the idea that within a minute of meeting someone you might be fucking a turn on, it obviously doesn't appeal to everyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Strangely enough, the only meets we didn't take further were the 2 that we had a social with first.

All the meets we ever had without a social meet, just phone calls and emails, for the most part were great with repeat meets.

XXXX

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By *eddonistikMan
over a year ago

Manchester


"Strangely enough, the only meets we didn't take further were the 2 that we had a social with first.

All the meets we ever had without a social meet, just phone calls and emails, for the most part were great with repeat meets.

XXXX"

Nice to know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We won't do anything without a social meet first. For us, it just works better. We have talked (via messaging)to loads of people where there is NO chemistry whatsoever, and they are easy enough to out.

However, there often seems to be great chemistry during messaging, but then there may be none when meeting face to face. Better to find out then, instead of later in a hotel room! AWWK-WARD!

-JD

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By *a petite madameWoman
over a year ago

London / Essex


"We won't do anything without a social meet first. For us, it just works better. We have talked (via messaging)to loads of people where there is NO chemistry whatsoever, and they are easy enough to out.

However, there often seems to be great chemistry during messaging, but then there may be none when meeting face to face. Better to find out then, instead of later in a hotel room! AWWK-WARD!

-JD"

. Totally agree with you on this one!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think this splits into two camps of definition.

To some, myself included it means where a largeish group of swingers of all the many varieties get together in a club or pub, drink and chat. Some may end up playing somewhere that night with others, others not. Sex isn't the main purpose of the evening, more mixing with like minded people, a chance to let your hair down. I've only ever been to ones in Manchester, all of which have been in the Village where all sorts of shennanagins can go on without people batting an eyelid.

To others it means meeting others, couples, singles whatever in smaller numbers, maybe just two couples, a couple and a single or maybe two single people meeting up. At this it's more like an ordinary 'first date' in the 'conventional world.' Just getting to know each other before deciding on whether to have a meet where you will have sexual contact.

Some prefer to meet up and get down to fun early on in the meet, they know before the meet that sex is pretty much on the agenda / menu. I certainly wouldn't class these as socials and don't think many or any others would either.

I've been to the first type quite a few times, some on my own, others with a partner. Sometimes sexual encounters have occurred, sometimes not. I have had a small number number of the second group, mostly it's ended up with sex in one form or anther happening on the same night. The times when it's been a purely social meet with sex to perhaps follow on a subsequent meet, I think it's only once that there has been a second meet with sex.

To my mind I think it comes down to what I consider should be the main rule of swinging, 'whatever floats your boat.' ."
this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like going to a social listed in the clubs/meets section or going to a club.

To be faced with a 1-1 social terrifies me. I'd rather stick with what I do, ok I may have had couple meets where there was no chemistry, but, I have taken a risk and met a few people I wouldn't normally meet and had some of the best sexual encounters.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Does anyone else get more nervous at having a social meet than getting their clothes off? I'm far more comfortable getting naked and playing instead of sat chatting over dinner "

I like both. Not shy about getting naked and not shy about chatting over coffee. I don't do dinners or meals though until I know someone better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always ask for a social meet first, then there's no pressure. I've taken it further when the attraction and chemistry was as good and better than expected But I've also walked away when men haven't looked like their pictures and conversation has dried up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I always ask for a social meet first, then there's no pressure. I've taken it further when the attraction and chemistry was as good and better than expected But I've also walked away when men haven't looked like their pictures and conversation has dried up "

Well you wouldn't walk away if you met me.... I look exactly like my pics!!! They were taken 32 year ago lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We haven't tried the social side yet. We much prefer the stranger bit about it as it adds to the excitement

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley


"I love socials and defo a must before any fun "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We haven't tried the social side yet. We much prefer the stranger bit about it as it adds to the excitement "

We agree .... We are not here to socialise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We haven't tried the social side yet. We much prefer the stranger bit about it as it adds to the excitement

We agree .... We are not here to socialise "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm going to my first social next week, I'm looking forward to it!

I love the socialising with people part and socialising with like mined people is better, I don't want to sleep my way through the site just looking for quality not quantity and the socials might help me find that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes thats why i prefer to just meet for sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We haven't tried the social side yet. We much prefer the stranger bit about it as it adds to the excitement "
most defiantly

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By *itSamCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham


"loves the social side of swinging "

How about a karaoke at a swinging club. Would you be more nervous singing before shagging lol.

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By *eddonistikMan
over a year ago

Manchester


"loves the social side of swinging

How about a karaoke at a swinging club. Would you be more nervous singing before shagging lol."

No but the other people should be nervous if they're going to hear me sing

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By *unPeteMan
over a year ago

Near Bristol

I do get a little nervous before a social meet. Not knowing what to expect. Also I think it's because I'm hoping it will go well and might lead to some playtime!

It's a pleasant nervousness if you know what I mean.

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By *an and wifeyCouple
over a year ago

n lincs

Always nervous but don't show it. But we are getting into the socials. Fun way of getting to know like minded peeps and have a giggle and maybe a dance too lol

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By *itSamCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Always nervous but don't show it. But we are getting into the socials. Fun way of getting to know like minded peeps and have a giggle and maybe a dance too lol "

And for those wanting a dance and a karaoke look at the forums under events for karaoke on the 28th June at xtasia.

Should be a good night.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same for us guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We love the social side of this lifestyle. It feels very liberating to talk with likeminded people.

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I don't really do social meets, after all the mailing and flirting I am ready to meet the guy properly and I have been very lucky that I usually pick well and we all have a good time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm going to my first social soon and a its a whole weekend affair so feeling a little anxious myself. ...is it wrong to expect any playtime from this!? also any tips would be appreciated thanks

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By *eddonistikMan
over a year ago

Manchester


"I'm going to my first social soon and a its a whole weekend affair so feeling a little anxious myself. ...is it wrong to expect any playtime from this!? also any tips would be appreciated thanks "

Regarding playtime, if it'll happen it'll happen. Just go along and enjoy time with like minded people. If it'll happen anywhere it'll happen there.

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By *an and wifeyCouple
over a year ago

n lincs

Never expect fun at a social then you won't feel let down when you get nothing. If play occurs then bonus. We done a few socials now and stopped over at hotels for some. But still never played at them. We use them to letour hair down and have a bit of Craic/ flirt/ laugh with like minded peeps. If we get on. Sure we can meet up for fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have had socials where we have built a rapport first and clearly we have things in common. We have looked forward to those ones.

There have been a few with just a handful of messages and they can make us nervous but on the whole, we see it for what it is - a drink or a meal with no pressure of sex.

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By *uestandpinkCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

Can not agree more....always best to see if the chemistry is right before play .....a few messages on fab 1st.......a chat on mobi.......then a social .......best way 100%

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks for the advice and will take that on board with me when i go

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