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if you had free reign

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

and your other half told you they were happy for you to go out and 'have sex' with other people, if you felt the need to, would you take them up on their offer or not?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I would who wouldn't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, love is too strong a feeling to just go and shag someone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It depends what you are here to achieve. We said that play together stay together. We have 3 sums 4 sums and hopefully a gangbang shortly. We love both experiencing each others pleasures. You can always do separate rooms which is a great turn on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes and we both do.

But it's not like we shag about like tomorrows not coming.

We treat it like meets together, we find people, we have a chat and ifwe go ahead so be it.

OH comes with me on first meets, just for a drink to make sure im safe but he trusts my judgement.

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By *r Mahogany70Man
over a year ago

Leicester

If I had a free reign mine would be an absolute monarchy and as such I'd have a free rein to shag whoever I pleased. Even in the rain.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I would

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

No I wouldn't, I only feel safe when he's there, we embarked on this as a joint venture and it's the shared aspect of it that I enjoy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, and we do. Does not work for everyone but we have a really strong relationship, been together 11 years and are really happy. For me monogamy does not come naturally, I told my now husband this pretty much as soon as we met. What does come naturally is love, trust and respect. I am free knowing that I never have to lie to my best friend and that I can share everything with him. We both have one life and I do not feel marriage is a licence to dictate to another what they can or can't do with their own bodies, I want him to have as many life experiences as he chooses. Knowing that I can doesn't always mean that I do, in some ways it makes me more selective. I go to clubs alone sometimes and never get around to playing. I also like hearing about hubby's extra marital adventures, and not only for the kink but because I like to hear that he has had fun, sex is just another pleasure, love is the sticking point and that is what is special.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"and your other half told you they were happy for you to go out and 'have sex' with other people, if you felt the need to, would you take them up on their offer or not?"

Would you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, and we do. Does not work for everyone but we have a really strong relationship, been together 11 years and are really happy. For me monogamy does not come naturally, I told my now husband this pretty much as soon as we met. What does come naturally is love, trust and respect. I am free knowing that I never have to lie to my best friend and that I can share everything with him. We both have one life and I do not feel marriage is a licence to dictate to another what they can or can't do with their own bodies, I want him to have as many life experiences as he chooses. Knowing that I can doesn't always mean that I do, in some ways it makes me more selective. I go to clubs alone sometimes and never get around to playing. I also like hearing about hubby's extra marital adventures, and not only for the kink but because I like to hear that he has had fun, sex is just another pleasure, love is the sticking point and that is what is special. "

Exactly the same for me, almost verbatim. Right down to the discussion about monogamy being unimportant.

Thankfully my then boyfriend soon to be husband agreed 100%

Never looked back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

********disclaimer******Just read my post back, sounds a bit shouty, sorry, I am not saying in any way that others who do not play separately are dictators or there relationship is any less strong. Theses are just my reasons why I live the way I do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I wouldn't and neither would my OH and to be honest I can't get my head around playing alone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I had a free reign mine would be an absolute monarchy and as such I'd have a free rein to shag whoever I pleased. Even in the rain. "

couldn't agree more.....and yes we do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes and we both do.

But it's not like we shag about like tomorrows not coming.

We treat it like meets together, we find people, we have a chat and ifwe go ahead so be it.

OH comes with me on first meets, just for a drink to make sure im safe but he trusts my judgement."

so in your point of view,its seperate house swapping?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I was in love then no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"********disclaimer******Just read my post back, sounds a bit shouty, sorry, I am not saying in any way that others who do not play separately are dictators or there relationship is any less strong. Theses are just my reasons why I live the way I do "

I didn't read it as at all shouty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes and we both do.

But it's not like we shag about like tomorrows not coming.

We treat it like meets together, we find people, we have a chat and ifwe go ahead so be it.

OH comes with me on first meets, just for a drink to make sure im safe but he trusts my judgement."

I would like to have a drink with mr one day ; )

New pic, Hate Man U but it looks great on you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We joined this site after the topic came up in conversation one night, for us it's the freedom to explore sexually and I love to see my partner having fun and enjoying himself, as long as he's happy I am!

That said for me it's about expressing myself, I love sex and to be sexually free in a strong committed relationship is so liberating....mmmm

Hubby gets turned on by me having fun & vice versed, it's just another little extension of our sex-life but not something we do all the time, as & when we choose.

You only get one life, live it to the max!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes and we both do.

But it's not like we shag about like tomorrows not coming.

We treat it like meets together, we find people, we have a chat and ifwe go ahead so be it.

OH comes with me on first meets, just for a drink to make sure im safe but he trusts my judgement.

so in your point of view,its seperate house swapping?"

No it's not swapping. We have a non monogamous marriage.

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By *nfieldishCouple
over a year ago

Enfield

I have " permission"... But would find it no fun without my Susie........

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"********disclaimer******Just read my post back, sounds a bit shouty, sorry, I am not saying in any way that others who do not play separately are dictators or there relationship is any less strong. Theses are just my reasons why I live the way I do "

I chose to read it that way I knew you were putting your point of view and not implying anything about other people. We play the way we do because it suits us and like you we accept that different things suit other people. We've been together coming up for 34 years, know each other inside out warts and all and have a good strong relationship

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"********disclaimer******Just read my post back, sounds a bit shouty, sorry, I am not saying in any way that others who do not play separately are dictators or there relationship is any less strong. Theses are just my reasons why I live the way I do

I didn't read it as at all shouty."

Thanks just read it back after posting it and thought I had gone on a bit, the reason I did was to explain to people who 'can't get their head around it'. Personally I really don't understand why within a swinging couple they have to do it only as a couple. I can't get my head around that. But we are all different and thank god for that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"********disclaimer******Just read my post back, sounds a bit shouty, sorry, I am not saying in any way that others who do not play separately are dictators or there relationship is any less strong. Theses are just my reasons why I live the way I do

I chose to read it that way I knew you were putting your point of view and not implying anything about other people. We play the way we do because it suits us and like you we accept that different things suit other people. We've been together coming up for 34 years, know each other inside out warts and all and have a good strong relationship "

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"********disclaimer******Just read my post back, sounds a bit shouty, sorry, I am not saying in any way that others who do not play separately are dictators or there relationship is any less strong. Theses are just my reasons why I live the way I do

I didn't read it as at all shouty.

Thanks just read it back after posting it and thought I had gone on a bit, the reason I did was to explain to people who 'can't get their head around it'. Personally I really don't understand why within a swinging couple they have to do it only as a couple. I can't get my head around that. But we are all different and thank god for that!"

I never justify the way we do things on here and I don't expect anyone else to. There are quite a lot of things I don't understand but I don't need to if I'm not involved in it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes and we both do.

But it's not like we shag about like tomorrows not coming.

We treat it like meets together, we find people, we have a chat and ifwe go ahead so be it.

OH comes with me on first meets, just for a drink to make sure im safe but he trusts my judgement.

I would like to have a drink with mr one day ; )

New pic, Hate Man U but it looks great on you "

Haha, only put it on to take the Mickey on another thread.

Mr D is awesome. My best pal. Blokes who see me know him and he gets on with them. I don't need to look after his safety so I know who the ladies are but don't meet them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"********disclaimer******Just read my post back, sounds a bit shouty, sorry, I am not saying in any way that others who do not play separately are dictators or there relationship is any less strong. Theses are just my reasons why I live the way I do

I chose to read it that way I knew you were putting your point of view and not implying anything about other people. We play the way we do because it suits us and like you we accept that different things suit other people. We've been together coming up for 34 years, know each other inside out warts and all and have a good strong relationship "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"and your other half told you they were happy for you to go out and 'have sex' with other people, if you felt the need to, would you take them up on their offer or not?

Would you?"

i havent, and dont think i would.

see, just something that was said the other day.

to paraphrase, it went 'i love you so much i want you to be happy, even if that means sleeping with other women while im not there'

now, because we are in a long distance relationship we spend a lot of time apart, so she seems to think that i have desires that involve other women, which i dont, and ever have while we have been together.

even when i split from my ex i never did the whole sexual blow out/one night stand thing that some do when they become single again, its jsut never interested me.

she has offered me the opportunity to have sex with people we have met in the past, and they have also been up for it, but its just not something i am comfortable with, just wondered if others were the same, or whether im a little bit ghey lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have discussed all the possible variations you get in swinging, and the thing that sticks out more than anything is we get pleasure from watching each other with someone else more than the actual sex we are having, if that makes sense? So to meet alone just doesn't appeal to us because it's taking away the visual stimulation we get of seeing each other in action so to speak, and so would take away a lot of the fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"and your other half told you they were happy for you to go out and 'have sex' with other people, if you felt the need to, would you take them up on their offer or not?

Would you?

i havent, and dont think i would.

see, just something that was said the other day.

to paraphrase, it went 'i love you so much i want you to be happy, even if that means sleeping with other women while im not there'

now, because we are in a long distance relationship we spend a lot of time apart, so she seems to think that i have desires that involve other women, which i dont, and ever have while we have been together.

even when i split from my ex i never did the whole sexual blow out/one night stand thing that some do when they become single again, its jsut never interested me.

she has offered me the opportunity to have sex with people we have met in the past, and they have also been up for it, but its just not something i am comfortable with, just wondered if others were the same, or whether im a little bit ghey lol"

What is it you do as a couple? If it's full swap then I would say you do have desires to have sex with other women but you want to share that desire with your partner, I have no desire to have one on one sex with another woman but love sharing and been shared with other women with Mrs liddy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have discussed all the possible variations you get in swinging, and the thing that sticks out more than anything is we get pleasure from watching each other with someone else more than the actual sex we are having, if that makes sense? So to meet alone just doesn't appeal to us because it's taking away the visual stimulation we get of seeing each other in action so to speak, and so would take away a lot of the fun"

This probably sums up our approach as well.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"and your other half told you they were happy for you to go out and 'have sex' with other people, if you felt the need to, would you take them up on their offer or not?

Would you?

i havent, and dont think i would.

see, just something that was said the other day.

to paraphrase, it went 'i love you so much i want you to be happy, even if that means sleeping with other women while im not there'

now, because we are in a long distance relationship we spend a lot of time apart, so she seems to think that i have desires that involve other women, which i dont, and ever have while we have been together.

even when i split from my ex i never did the whole sexual blow out/one night stand thing that some do when they become single again, its jsut never interested me.

she has offered me the opportunity to have sex with people we have met in the past, and they have also been up for it, but its just not something i am comfortable with, just wondered if others were the same, or whether im a little bit ghey lol

What is it you do as a couple? If it's full swap then I would say you do have desires to have sex with other women but you want to share that desire with your partner, I have no desire to have one on one sex with another woman but love sharing and been shared with other women with Mrs liddy"

no, we soft play.

have had no desire to take it any further with anyone we have met, or with those we havent on here lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have discussed all the possible variations you get in swinging, and the thing that sticks out more than anything is we get pleasure from watching each other with someone else more than the actual sex we are having, if that makes sense? So to meet alone just doesn't appeal to us because it's taking away the visual stimulation we get of seeing each other in action so to speak, and so would take away a lot of the fun"

I'm the same. I like to watch, be watched, share the experience. We're free to do whatever we want with other people. But one on one just doesn't appeal anymore.

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By *iggles and BeardyCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

We have had such an agreement for years, from before we started swinging, though it's rare we ever bother. Nobody wants beardy and wiggles is far to busy with mates if she goes out.

We also enjoy playing with others far to much and watching each other.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes, and we do. Does not work for everyone but we have a really strong relationship, been together 11 years and are really happy. For me monogamy does not come naturally, I told my now husband this pretty much as soon as we met. What does come naturally is love, trust and respect. I am free knowing that I never have to lie to my best friend and that I can share everything with him. We both have one life and I do not feel marriage is a licence to dictate to another what they can or can't do with their own bodies, I want him to have as many life experiences as he chooses. Knowing that I can doesn't always mean that I do, in some ways it makes me more selective. I go to clubs alone sometimes and never get around to playing. I also like hearing about hubby's extra marital adventures, and not only for the kink but because I like to hear that he has had fun, sex is just another pleasure, love is the sticking point and that is what is special.

Exactly the same for me, almost verbatim. Right down to the discussion about monogamy being unimportant.

Thankfully my then boyfriend soon to be husband agreed 100%

Never looked back."

same here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've given the wife the OK

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is something me and my OH have talked about I just worry about meeting alone with out him

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