The same hormones create nervousness and excitement, sometimes it is hard to discriminate which feeling we are experiencing. Some nervousness is to be expected, as is excitement. Learning to relax is a skill, like any other behaviour. The more you do it, the easier it is. Slow deep breathing is one of the easiest ways to calm your nerves. As is managing your thoughts, so you are not obsessing etc. Get some stress hormones out of your system too - exercise is also great. Whether a walk,run,cycle or gym, it doesnt matter, it melts it away. Also, get to know your partners first, so that they are less like strangers. Chat, meet socially, whatever works for you all. I always speak on the phone first, so we all get a feel for each other. If you all have an agreed plan, it is also helpful. Believe in yourself and have a backup plan, should it not work - whether chat with friends, a film, whatever. And keep practising the relaxation. Eventually like all skills, it becomes a habit and unconscious. Good luck in your next meets. |
Sounds like you were! Were you meeting socially first or just diving straight in? A chance to just chat and relax before fun - a quick drink before fun (doesn't need to be alcoholic) often helps settle nerves, and breaks the ice.
