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etiquette for checking referral?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

What do you think the etiquette is to confirm or ask for more details on a referral?

Specifically if you are considering a meet person A and see that they have a one line referral from person B, can you reach out to person B and ask for more information?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my opinion absolutely not completely inappropriate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldnt personally

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By *renchbambi xWoman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

Thats just not the done thing! Bad bad taste and will earn you a permanent block from me!

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By *rimal1968Couple
over a year ago

derbyshire

I have had that done to us and it just makes us mad and not want to speak to the person at all.

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By *iceguydaveMan
over a year ago

Monmouth

I'd agree with the above responses (i.e not a good idea) but with the proviso: if you already know 'person B', then I don't think it would be inappropriate to say to them "Hey, I see you've met A, what are they like?"..

But I don't think that's the situation you're talking about here.. I wouldn't want a total stranger messaging me asking about someone I'd met/verified through here, it comes across as rude/intrusive at best, creepy/stalkerish at worst!

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By *aughtywifeandhimCouple
over a year ago

bedford

Can't see any problems with this if your only talking with people you have previously. Met.can help to warn people of time wasters or creeps lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you ask person A if you may talk to person B about it you might be ok - but in no way should you ever go to person B out of the blue.

Genuine people will understand your caution - and really shouldn't have anything to hide

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you can do what you like, its your choice, but you have none of your own, so others have to take you at your word, can you not afford them a similar courtesy?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"you can do what you like, its your choice, but you have none of your own, so others have to take you at your word, can you not afford them a similar courtesy?"

Thanks for all the feedback - that's why I asked the question.

Interesting that the US forum had a different response to this question.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you mean the fact that more people bothered replying on this forum than the american one?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"you mean the fact that more people bothered replying on this forum than the american one?"

That the one us person said they totally do it. However it is only one person who can't represent the entire country.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Simple answer - just don't!

Anytime I've been asked about someone i know I've informed them - and they've promptly blocked the other party.

If you want to know something about someone - ask them themselves!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't agree with approaching people for information about others, discretion is key.

This is not trip advisor

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, never. Someone did that about me once and person B told him to sod off and find out for himself like he had to. Person B had left me a lovely veri so he just couldn't understand why! I was pissed off to say the least!

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

If someone I didn't know contacted us asking about someone we'd left a veri for then I'd treat it like unsolicited market research i.e. lie like a cheap chinese watch.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did have a lady message me to ask about one of my veri's as she lived a long way away and wanted to know if it was "really" worth the effort - plus she was very new - like been on a week - so I answered her question but I wouldnt do it myself x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did have a lady message me to ask about one of my veri's as she lived a long way away and wanted to know if it was "really" worth the effort - plus she was very new - like been on a week - so I answered her question but I wouldnt do it myself x "

We agree with this as an exception .

We would have done the same , but would never dream of asking anyone ourselves .

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