FabSwingers.com forum: Definition of cheating??

By *angtidy10 OP Couple
over a year ago

wolves

I went out with my girly friends a couple of weeks ago and as usual we ended up with our tongues down each others throats at the end of the night lol.

Obviously I told my husband when I got back (he wasnt surprised) and its never bothered him. He would however be bothered if id been doing that with another man without him there and would class that as cheating (and so would I) and its not something I wud wana do with another guy without hubby there anyway.

His mate however has said that me kissing my girly mates is also cheating and he wudnt have it if it was his gf (thank fuck im not!)

Just wondering what other peoples opinions are?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To me, cheating is doing something behind your partners back that you know they wouldn't consent to and that would hurt them.

If your husband has told you that its okay for you to do that and you are always honest about it then no, I don't think what you did was cheating xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To me, cheating is doing something behind your partners back that you know they wouldn't consent to and that would hurt them.

If your husband has told you that its okay for you to do that and you are always honest about it then no, I don't think what you did was cheating xx

"
i concur

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your man's mate needs to get a life.

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By *r Mahogany70Man
over a year ago

Leicester

Your man's mate needs to get a life. "

Why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your man's mate needs to get a life.

Why? "

Because it's none of his business? Because he sounds like a boring old fart moaning about a couple of girl mates having a laugh? Because it sounds like he just wants to shit stir?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To me, cheating is doing something behind your partners back that you know they wouldn't consent to and that would hurt them.

If your husband has told you that its okay for you to do that and you are always honest about it then no, I don't think what you did was cheating xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

agree with reggie06

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your man's mate needs to get a life.

Why?

Because it's none of his business? Because he sounds like a boring old fart moaning about a couple of girl mates having a laugh? Because it sounds like he just wants to shit stir? "

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By *uited staffs guyMan
over a year ago

staffordshire

Cheating is if it's secret in my view hence swinging isn't cheating

It's adultery and against marriage vows without a doubt, but not cheating, in my view

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

In my eyes cheating is doing something that would hurt someone who loves you.

Its interesting that in general people are more ready to accept two women interacting sexually outside of a main relationship than a man and a woman.

As to the disapproving friend I guess he was told about the incident so was entitled to express his view.

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By *its The Spot AlotMan
over a year ago

Plymouth

I agree,doesn't matter male of female fun with either of us.

My other half knows exactly what i do and i know exactly what she does,

So that's NOT cheating at all, what ever she or i do from kissing to fucking.

she normally checks before playing but there has been the odd time when she has surprised me with a chance encounter say at work, where she has sneaked into a stationary cupboard and sucked a cock.

which made me soooo horny when she told me after.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your man's mate needs to get a life.

Why?

Because it's none of his business? Because he sounds like a boring old fart moaning about a couple of girl mates having a laugh? Because it sounds like he just wants to shit stir? "

not everyone likes the idea of their partners kissing someone else, man or woman, you may just see two women having a snog as them having a laugh but to some their wife/girlfriend kissing anther woman is the same as them kissing a man, would you be ok with your partner going out and snogging others when she was out alone?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plus if its none of his business maybe they shouldn't be telling him what she gets upto on her night out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I went out with my girly friends a couple of weeks ago and as usual we ended up with our tongues down each others throats at the end of the night lol.

His mate however has said that me kissing my girly mates is also cheating and he wudnt have it if it was his gf (thank fuck im not!)

Just wondering what other peoples opinions are?"
..Same as yours it's not cheating snogging your girl-friend if its ok with your partner,Your hubby's mate seems to have the green eye if you ask me.

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

"I went out with my girly friends a couple of weeks ago and as usual we ended up with our tongues down each others throats at the end of the night lol "

This stuck out to me far beyond the cheating question posed in the OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As has been said, cheating is doing something without your partners knowledge/consent. What is allowed will differ from person to person so whilst your husband is fine with you kissing other women, that doesn't make his friend in the wrong when he says he feels kissing anyone, whether male or female, is cheating as that is his boundary. A lot would view swinging as cheating, even though it is fully consensual but that is because some people believe in monogamous sex. So long as you stay within the boundaries you have set in your relationship and remain honest with each other then it isn't cheating...as soon as you need to lie it is

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By *exymixedcouple7Couple
over a year ago

london

Question is would you be ok if your hubby went out and snogged another woman? Weather it be a friend or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Question is would you be ok if your hubby went out and snogged another woman? Weather it be a friend or not."
..He would have to kiss a man,She said she kissed a girl not a man.

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By *angtidy10 OP Couple
over a year ago

wolves

Just to make it clear. I didnt say his friend was wrong or not entitled to his opinion.

I was just curious what other peoples opinions were thats all!

Me and hubby dont see it as cheating, we are happy so that's all that matters to me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Question is would you be ok if your hubby went out and snogged another woman? Weather it be a friend or not."

I suppose to ask the question fairly you'd have to ask if she would be ok if he went out and snogged another man

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By *ohnjones3210Man
over a year ago

Chester

For me, if my gf was kissing women, I'd find it a real turn on and I'd allow it. Assuming that these were clean, classy women.

I'd probably encourage it to be fair so that I could watch ans join in.

I wouldn't like it if she was going off with random men if I wasn't there. One, because I'd worry that she's in danger - I don't like the idea of some random potential weirdo being alone with my gf without me being there to protect her in the event that something kicked off. Two, I'd feel let down by the fact that she never even told me.

Xxx

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By *angtidy10 OP Couple
over a year ago

wolves

"Question is would you be ok if your hubby went out and snogged another woman? Weather it be a friend or not...He would have to kiss a man,She said she kissed a girl not a man."

Well thats one scenario I dont have to worry about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

doing something with someone else without the knowledge of your partner is cheating whether wit the same or opposite sex.

have to say, i wouldnt mind if V did what you did on a night out, as long as we had discussed it beforehand.

to report back and tell me after the fact would be a little off, to my mind.

see, my brother didnt mind his missus being bisexual as he got his little 3somes out of it every now and then, but it backfired as she struck up a relationship with one of her conquests, so you really do have to be careful what you let your partner away with

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By *extoysareusCouple
over a year ago

kinky heaven

I think that's up to you and your partner to define what cheating is in your eyes.

and don't worry of your friends perception

We all have different perceptions of cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I don't think most men see girl on girl as real sex, they just see it as a bit of fun or something to turn them on so see no threat in their woman copping off with another female, where as they see a man as a threat so dont view it the same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Personally I don't think most men see girl on girl as real sex, they just see it as a bit of fun or something to turn them on so see no threat in their woman copping off with another female, where as they see a man as a threat so dont view it the same

any sexual contact with another without the consent of the partner is cheating, whether the same sex, opposite sex, or different species

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

any sexual contact with another without the consent of the partner is cheating, whether the same sex, opposite sex, or different species

I didn't say it wasn't cheating I just said I think most men wouldn't view their wife with a woman the same as they would a man

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By *extoysareusCouple
over a year ago

kinky heaven

any sexual contact with another without the consent of the partner is cheating, whether the same sex, opposite sex, or different species

I didn't say it wasn't cheating I just said I think most men wouldn't view their wife with a woman the same as they would a man "

Lol how can you say that!!

It may be a fantasy to some people but it has destroyed families on the other

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

any sexual contact with another without the consent of the partner is cheating, whether the same sex, opposite sex, or different species

I didn't say it wasn't cheating I just said I think most men wouldn't view their wife with a woman the same as they would a man

Lol how can you say that!!

It may be a fantasy to some people but it has destroyed families on the other"

its true though, in the animal kingdom, the alpha male has his female, but he will only attack another male, not another female,

its about territory and ownership of the woman.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

any sexual contact with another without the consent of the partner is cheating, whether the same sex, opposite sex, or different species

I didn't say it wasn't cheating I just said I think most men wouldn't view their wife with a woman the same as they would a man "

knowing what i know, and have posted, i agree with you, although i think its more that its still seen as cheating its only the reaction thats different.

woman on man it would be arguments and crying, possibly lead to a break up

woman on woman, it would probably be preceeded with 'can i watch?'

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