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taking you seriously

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough

I have been on this site for about twelve months now and have met with only two women from here. One has since left cause she is getting married but we still keep in touch. The other i still meet up with when time permits.

As i have only two verification would this be the reason Wy none of the women on here seem to take me seriously?

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By *uietlyKinkyUsCouple
over a year ago

midlands

Some people meet those without veris so in that sense id say no. I don't. I won't meet someone new without seeing met in person veris but i do look at the trail so that might be an issue?? Im sure others will just accept your verified & make a decision based on profile, message, attraction etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no Prof is fine but the person who Verified you is just on about snakes...???

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

only having one verification doesn't stop us from considering people, in our case the sticking point would be that you're only available weekdays in the day, we work during the week along with lots of others. Apart from that its probably a case of keep on trying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some people meet those without veris so in that sense id say no. I don't. I won't meet someone new without seeing met in person veris but i do look at the trail so that might be an issue?? Im sure others will just accept your verified & make a decision based on profile, message, attraction etc"

You should be a diplomat

OP I don't understand what you mean about being taken seriously? What reaction are you getting to make you think you're not? Isn't it just a case that youve not found a suitable match yet?

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"no Prof is fine but the person who Verified you is just on about snakes...???"

Lol that's what got my attention yr the story about the one eyed bed snake.

Liked her humor

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Verifications are not the only factors taken into account by prospective meets.

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"only having one verification doesn't stop us from considering people, in our case the sticking point would be that you're only available weekdays in the day, we work during the week along with lots of others. Apart from that its probably a case of keep on trying."

Can see your point , but i don't even get to have conversation. So maybe its just that i look like a minger!i lol

Can meet in evenings just have to arrange to stay over in a hotel

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That suggest you have a partner at home then and that would put a lot of people off too.

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough

@ 2innotts

Its when you have obviously read the profile and put a word in as requested o prove your serious or just to prove Uv read all there do and donts

And they still don't at least take the time to say thanks but no thanks?

I know they probably get a few messages a day so it it most likely the same old story, too many messages and not enough time a?

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"That suggest you have a partner at home then and that would put a lot of people off too. "

Well that is also true but only being honest after all. Better to do that than getting found out anyway, cause yet always will at some point and then the trust is lost isn't it?

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"Verifications are not the only factors taken into account by prospective meets. "

Yes i understand that, but never message people that i don't fit into their profile limits and likes.

May like pictures but not message them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That suggest you have a partner at home then and that would put a lot of people off too.

Well that is also true but only being honest after all. Better to do that than getting found out anyway, cause yet always will at some point and then the trust is lost isn't it?"

You don't actually state that though, so you're leaving people to add 2+2 together on that. Yes I agree that if you're playing away you should be honest. But it wont appeal to some people, so I'm saying that's going to be a big factor I'd suggest that would go against people being interested in you.

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"That suggest you have a partner at home then and that would put a lot of people off too.

Well that is also true but only being honest after all. Better to do that than getting found out anyway, cause yet always will at some point and then the trust is lost isn't it?

You don't actually state that though, so you're leaving people to add 2+2 together on that. Yes I agree that if you're playing away you should be honest. But it wont appeal to some people, so I'm saying that's going to be a big factor I'd suggest that would go against people being interested in you."

Yes i do see the point your making

Thank you for taking the time to give your views has enlightened me more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"@ 2innotts

Its when you have obviously read the profile and put a word in as requested o prove your serious or just to prove Uv read all there do and donts

And they still don't at least take the time to say thanks but no thanks?

I know they probably get a few messages a day so it it most likely the same old story, too many messages and not enough time a?"

I think you might be under estimating the amount of messages fems and couples get...it's not just a few. People on here are also on here for fun, that doesn't necessarily involve having to answer every flippin message. Every message sent, 99.9% of the time gets you another one back.

If you say thanks but no thanks, we've had abusive messages in the past like we had "yer well good luck cos you both look like fatties anyway". This is not uncommon from other threads I've read. If your message is unread, perhaps the recipient has checked your profile and decided you're not for them. Or if your message is not replied to, the same thing. Why do you need a message back to confirm this?

Another thing I find is guys who message when we aren't actually looking to meet. And there's hundreds who do this. So what should we do with all these guys? Do we make a note of them all for when we meet? I have done this by the way and guess what - they are rarely ever free when we want to meet, so all the messaging has been a complete waste of time. It works much better for us when we post a Meet Today and then people who are free can contact us. This is what we did the other week and met some lovely new people. Mind you we did have one guy who sent 3 or 4 messages. I looked at his profile and didn't like what I saw, so I ignored the messages. I finally got a message with some abuse after he saw our updated status which said something like "looking forward to seeing everyone later". So he clocked that he wasn't our type and started with the abuse - so do you think i'm wrong to ignore people like this? It only confirmed to me he wasn't our type and thank god we didn't let him into our home.

None of us appeal to everyone, you just have to keep looking for a better match.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That suggest you have a partner at home then and that would put a lot of people off too.

Well that is also true but only being honest after all. Better to do that than getting found out anyway, cause yet always will at some point and then the trust is lost isn't it?"

So you've changed your profile to can accommodate I see. Well you obviously don't want people to know you're playing away from home (with or without permission)... what was you saying about honesty?

Honesty is really selective amongst cheaters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every day a new one appears

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That suggest you have a partner at home then and that would put a lot of people off too.

Well that is also true but only being honest after all. Better to do that than getting found out anyway, cause yet always will at some point and then the trust is lost isn't it?

So you've changed your profile to can accommodate I see. Well you obviously don't want people to know you're playing away from home (with or without permission)... what was you saying about honesty?

Honesty is really selective amongst cheaters "

He had that before I posted. I think his partner must work during the day so he can accommodate while she's out is what I concluded.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That suggest you have a partner at home then and that would put a lot of people off too.

Well that is also true but only being honest after all. Better to do that than getting found out anyway, cause yet always will at some point and then the trust is lost isn't it?

So you've changed your profile to can accommodate I see. Well you obviously don't want people to know you're playing away from home (with or without permission)... what was you saying about honesty?

Honesty is really selective amongst cheaters

He had that before I posted. I think his partner must work during the day so he can accommodate while she's out is what I concluded."

If I'm in error then I apologise for that error. Not for my statement about selective honesty for anyone who cheats though - and the OP needn't worry about THAT if he has permission BUT should put that on his profile in my opinion, so that members can make an informed decision

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"That suggest you have a partner at home then and that would put a lot of people off too.

Well that is also true but only being honest after all. Better to do that than getting found out anyway, cause yet always will at some point and then the trust is lost isn't it?

So you've changed your profile to can accommodate I see. Well you obviously don't want people to know you're playing away from home (with or without permission)... what was you saying about honesty?

Honesty is really selective amongst cheaters "

Im not aware it says that on my profile!

Will have to amend that thanks for pointing that out, it May be that i ment in a hotel if i did, not intentionally trying to miss lead honestly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you cheating?

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough

Technically you can say i am as i still live at home with the family, but not slept with partner for over six years now.

Its a long story , but the short answer would have to be yes i guess as still married

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your profile does not reflect your marriage!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want to know if you entertain meets at home during the day Dave?

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"Your profile does not reflect your marriage!"

Im sure it says on the profile i am married?

Wouldn't of put im signal cause im not

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"I want to know if you entertain meets at home during the day Dave?"

No i don't do meets at home cause always someone at home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I have more respect for guys / ladies that actually state their married. Profiles like yours just look like you're cheating on your wife and trying to get sex by deceiving other people as well. I don't think it sits well with a lot of people.

I might be wrong, but maybe this is part of the problem

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"I think I have more respect for guys / ladies that actually state their married. Profiles like yours just look like you're cheating on your wife and trying to get sex by deceiving other people as well. I don't think it sits well with a lot of people.

I might be wrong, but maybe this is part of the problem "

To be honest i thought my profile did say i was married.

Will have to sort that out cause that's not my intention. Sure iv not put single though.

Will check when i have time though thanks for pointing it out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 30/10/13 12:32:12]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would never give or ask for a very, I meet mostly married men, and am discreet, once you post verifications, it opens a whole can of worms, who have you met, when, do they have unsafe sex, a trail can go back via verifications,

It just takes one unhinged person to cause you a lot of damage and upset.

I am a real person, I have meets, and I am discreet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!! "

I saw it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would never give or ask for a very, I meet mostly married men, and am discreet, once you post verifications, it opens a whole can of worms, who have you met, when, do they have unsafe sex, a trail can go back via verifications,

It just takes one unhinged person to cause you a lot of damage and upset.

I am a real person, I have meets, and I am discreet."

and a good example of someone happy to meet married guys - so there's no reason for people to hide this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

I saw it "

bugger I didn't.......I wanna see

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think I have more respect for guys / ladies that actually state their married. Profiles like yours just look like you're cheating on your wife and trying to get sex by deceiving other people as well. I don't think it sits well with a lot of people.

I might be wrong, but maybe this is part of the problem

To be honest i thought my profile did say i was married.

Will have to sort that out cause that's not my intention. Sure iv not put single though.

Will check when i have time though thanks for pointing it out"

You have to compose your relationship status in the body of your profile, not tick a box.

if you have time to read and write in the forum then you have time to amend your profile, IF you want to.

Like I stated before, it's about letting others make an informed decision about meeting you (some will, some will run a mile).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

I saw it

bugger I didn't.......I wanna see "

Some ancient Chinese thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

I saw it

bugger I didn't.......I wanna see

Some ancient Chinese thing"

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!! "

I didnt see it! Don't know how it got deleted mate, feel free to post again if not want lol

Freedom me speech and all that lol

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By *uietlyKinkyUsCouple
over a year ago

midlands


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

I didnt see it! Don't know how it got deleted mate, feel free to post again if not want lol

Freedom me speech and all that lol"

except site rules do not permit a variety of things & the mods will be quick to remove any posts or shut the thread down/remove it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

I didnt see it! Don't know how it got deleted mate, feel free to post again if not want lol

Freedom me speech and all that lol

except site rules do not permit a variety of things & the mods will be quick to remove any posts or shut the thread down/remove it"

Which I fall foul of on a semi regular basis

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By *uietlyKinkyUsCouple
over a year ago

midlands


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

I didnt see it! Don't know how it got deleted mate, feel free to post again if not want lol

Freedom me speech and all that lol

except site rules do not permit a variety of things & the mods will be quick to remove any posts or shut the thread down/remove it

Which I fall foul of on a semi regular basis "

Naughty step don't worry most of us have been there, & you're not a 'pukka' forumite until you have

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

I didnt see it! Don't know how it got deleted mate, feel free to post again if not want lol

Freedom me speech and all that lol

except site rules do not permit a variety of things & the mods will be quick to remove any posts or shut the thread down/remove it

Which I fall foul of on a semi regular basis

Naughty step don't worry most of us have been there, & you're not a 'pukka' forumite until you have "

It's a shame it's virtual. Imagine how easy it'd be to arrange mass socials if we were all transported to THE naughty step.

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"I think I have more respect for guys / ladies that actually state their married. Profiles like yours just look like you're cheating on your wife and trying to get sex by deceiving other people as well. I don't think it sits well with a lot of people.

I might be wrong, but maybe this is part of the problem

To be honest i thought my profile did say i was married.

Will have to sort that out cause that's not my intention. Sure iv not put single though.

Will check when i have time though thanks for pointing it out

You have to compose your relationship status in the body of your profile, not tick a box.

if you have time to read and write in the forum then you have time to amend your profile, IF you want to.

Like I stated before, it's about letting others make an informed decision about meeting you (some will, some will run a mile)."

Just amended my profile to say im married

Just so you can see im not trying to trick you girls, not my way.

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By *uietlyKinkyUsCouple
over a year ago

midlands


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

I didnt see it! Don't know how it got deleted mate, feel free to post again if not want lol

Freedom me speech and all that lol

except site rules do not permit a variety of things & the mods will be quick to remove any posts or shut the thread down/remove it

Which I fall foul of on a semi regular basis

Naughty step don't worry most of us have been there, & you're not a 'pukka' forumite until you have

It's a shame it's virtual. Imagine how easy it'd be to arrange mass socials if we were all transported to THE naughty step. "

You know when an en mass naughty step event has happened.... chams is busier (although I've been good for like a year now )

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By *udistnorthantsMan
over a year ago

Desborough

"You're gonna need a bigger step" to misquote Jaws

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By *estfrienddave OP   Man
over a year ago

wellingborough


"Best not write that in case I get banned again!!

I didnt see it! Don't know how it got deleted mate, feel free to post again if not want lol

Freedom me speech and all that lol

except site rules do not permit a variety of things & the mods will be quick to remove any posts or shut the thread down/remove it

Which I fall foul of on a semi regular basis

Naughty step don't worry most of us have been there, & you're not a 'pukka' forumite until you have

It's a shame it's virtual. Imagine how easy it'd be to arrange mass socials if we were all transported to THE naughty step. "

Al least that way i would get to meet some of you! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 30/10/13 13:04:09]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But what about the instances when veris tell nothing like the full story? There's more to life and NSA sex than this site and veris on a profile.

I have no veris from one of the first women on this site I met and who I have overnited with at least once a week (and the occasional daytime meet when time allows) for over 7 months. She's always very pleased to see and 'have' me. I'm there tonight actually and looking at my work rota predict my next visit may well be Sunday. Just saying don't judge a man, or woman, by their veris alone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But what about the instances when veris tell nothing like the full story? There's more to life and NSA sex than this site and veris on a profile.

I have no veris from one of the first women on this site I met and who I have overnited with at least once a week (and the occasional daytime meet when time allows) for over 7 months. She's always very pleased to see and 'have' me. I'm there tonight actually and looking at my work rota predict my next visit may well be Sunday. Just saying don't judge a man, or woman, by their veris alone "

Absolutely and great to hear you're having a lot of success. But I've learnt very recently after giving out personal information to non-verified guys who then didn't show up, that veri's are a pretty good indicator to prove people have met and aren't just fantasists. I like to see at least 2 or 3 veri's from different people and I like to see that those people are "real" and not created if you get what I mean. The profiles that have all that are more likely to meet and not waste our time and mess us about. We waited an hour and half for 3 guys and a couple to show up that never did and never got in touch on here or on mobile to say why...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But what about the instances when veris tell nothing like the full story? There's more to life and NSA sex than this site and veris on a profile.

I have no veris from one of the first women on this site I met and who I have overnited with at least once a week (and the occasional daytime meet when time allows) for over 7 months. She's always very pleased to see and 'have' me. I'm there tonight actually and looking at my work rota predict my next visit may well be Sunday. Just saying don't judge a man, or woman, by their veris alone

Absolutely and great to hear you're having a lot of success. But I've learnt very recently after giving out personal information to non-verified guys who then didn't show up, that veri's are a pretty good indicator to prove people have met and aren't just fantasists. I like to see at least 2 or 3 veri's from different people and I like to see that those people are "real" and not created if you get what I mean. The profiles that have all that are more likely to meet and not waste our time and mess us about. We waited an hour and half for 3 guys and a couple to show up that never did and never got in touch on here or on mobile to say why..."

Use the veris as you will. Like this post, I like to see a few stating has met and they give a thumbs up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But what about the instances when veris tell nothing like the full story? There's more to life and NSA sex than this site and veris on a profile.

I have no veris from one of the first women on this site I met and who I have overnited with at least once a week (and the occasional daytime meet when time allows) for over 7 months. She's always very pleased to see and 'have' me. I'm there tonight actually and looking at my work rota predict my next visit may well be Sunday. Just saying don't judge a man, or woman, by their veris alone

Absolutely and great to hear you're having a lot of success. But I've learnt very recently after giving out personal information to non-verified guys who then didn't show up, that veri's are a pretty good indicator to prove people have met and aren't just fantasists. I like to see at least 2 or 3 veri's from different people and I like to see that those people are "real" and not created if you get what I mean. The profiles that have all that are more likely to meet and not waste our time and mess us about. We waited an hour and half for 3 guys and a couple to show up that never did and never got in touch on here or on mobile to say why..."

I've also lost a veri or 3 from girls who've left the site. A couple of them I'm still touch with. Have certainly had experience of fantasists as well. Whilst several months on the site with no veris is certainly not good it appears some of them leave and rejoin to almost always appear as 'new'.

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