FabSwingers.com forum: How safe are you really?

By *ilthygorgeous1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

Ok! So we all like to play and some of us play regularly and play safe. But even wearing condoms we still come into contact with various bodily fluids and goo via fingers,mouths and whatever else floats your boat. This contact with multiple partners obviously leaves you wide open to the risks of STI's/ STD's. So what are people on here doing about it?

Now we get fully tested every 3-6 months just for peace of mind and because we respect and care for ourselves and the people we play with. So far we've been very lucky!

What we really want to know is- How many other do this? Have you given it any thought? Do people care?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes i get tested regulaly but have been lucky as i had unprotected sex with a couple of men, just depends who you have sex with because not everyone is going to catch something, GUM clinics are good for your peace of mind and you get free condoms.

the thing i dont get is men say they use condoms only then they rub their cocks which are oozing pre cum up against a womans pussy lips, well i always thought that is just as risky as having intercourse without using a condom?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

Sadly some think "It wont happen to me"!!!

And the ignorance of saying "They look clean"!!!...........

There will always be risk involved...

Play as safe as you can and get regular check us, its all you can do......

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sadly some think "It wont happen to me"!!!

And the ignorance of saying "They look clean"!!!...........

There will always be risk involved...

Play as safe as you can and get regular check us, its all you can do......

yes even doctors dont use condoms, but i think anything is possible and it could happen to you, hopefuly not though.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilthygorgeous1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

For us unprotected sex is a big no no!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

its a risk we all take

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilthygorgeous1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

[Removed by poster at 25/09/13 20:41:46]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get tested every couple months,just had all clear,i get bags full of durex,i go to clubs and not many men actually have them,too expensive i ve bin told,cba to carry them abt,oh ive forgot,there in my locker. So always make sure ive got them or no rumpypumpy x wouldnt say im completely safe as other bodily fluids,its a risk we all take

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilthygorgeous1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

It's nice to hear other people are being grown up and making the effort. We feel its a subject that should be discussed more.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *azyOldGitMan
over a year ago

leicestershire

I have a bag in the car, contents, tube of lube, sachets of lube and 20 odd condoms. I take 5 into the club with me, if I need more and the club doesn't supply them I go back and collect more from the car.

I restock it at the GUM clinic on a regular interval, every 2nd check up.

My clinic issues 30 for a 3 month period and if playing in a larger group that can deplete stocks very quick, so I pay my money and buy fresh. Healthy doesn't cost as much as illness does

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We get checked out regularly for peace of mind. Which is a big thing for me as it takes 2 people sitting on me to keep me still enough to get a needle in my arm. Until I pass out that is

I am a natural born worrier so hate the 5 days waiting for the results

We always use condoms as well.

Have to say if we met someone and they didn't have condoms because they "were too expensive" that would be the end of that playtime!! You can pick them up on special offer in any supermarket on any day!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My only gripe with this subject is testing intervals.. I don't think every 6 months is enough for some..and then people saying they have the all clear..

Only way your all clear is if you are tested but leave a good few months between any sexual contact and then get tested again.

Testing is a bit like an mot only done in arrears.. i.e. only valid on the day of the test and actually testing previous to the test...

I go every 4 to 6 weeks... Sometimes more frequently with times of celibacy if there have been incidents..

I certainly wouldn't like to go 6 months without a test.. imagine how many people by association you could have been in contact with.

So how safe am I... I'm as safe as I am happy with, knowing all the facts, same weighing up everything.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Checked every 3 mths. And now go together with my FB. And we're booking in for the hep B jabs next week on the advice of the clinic. We told all about our activities - they were as non judgemental as every clinic I've ever used and it'll be a date in the diary from now on for both of us to go together!

Can't see why anyone on site wouldn't!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *_MariusMan
over a year ago

Currently Faraway

"Ok! So we all like to play and some of us play regularly and play safe. But even wearing condoms we still come into contact with various bodily fluids and goo via fingers,mouths and whatever else floats your boat. This contact with multiple partners obviously leaves you wide open to the risks of STI's/ STD's. So what are people on here doing about it?

Now we get fully tested every 3-6 months just for peace of mind and because we respect and care for ourselves and the people we play with. So far we've been very lucky!

What we really want to know is- How many other do this? Have you given it any thought? Do people care? "

I get tested regularly. I think the billion ££ question would be 'why do some people NOT care?' It just frustrates me x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My only gripe with this subject is testing intervals.. I don't think every 6 months is enough for some..and then people saying they have the all clear."

Can't argue with that but I think I would rather hear someone went every six months than just never bothered. At least it shows there is some awareness there and they are taking some steps to protecting themselves and others

It amazed us that they took no notice when we said why we were there. Nice not to be judged for once. Apart from the big wink from the 50 year old female doctor when she said "have fun" as I said goodbye

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

There are risks with most things sexual, but I'm guessing that a slight touch from someone's fingers, where there's no open cuts etc on the recipient, would mean that it's a much smaller risk than, say, being fucked furiously without condoms being worn. What definitely reduces risk is if people are checked very frequently - I never think it's too frequent. Thankfully it seems that HIV transmission is fairly difficult, and guess that this has slowed its progression, alongside safer sex. Maybe swinging makes things safer, as there are more people involved, overlooking protection? I'm just glad that something like crabs isn't prevalent, as they'd move around and spread easily.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perfectly healthy guy here and don't need tests to prove it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now we get fully tested every 3-6 months just for peace of mind and because we respect and care for ourselves and the people we play with. So far we've been very lucky!

What we really want to know is- How many other do this? Have you given it any thought? Do people care? "

A lot more claim to than actually do so its always a risk.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I go on mass with all my work colleagues every three months. It gets you a morning off work and the banter in the waiting room is awesome . Our clinic has recently told us they will only do bloods every 6 months now due to cost, which I think is ridiculous.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilthygorgeous1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

"My only gripe with this subject is testing intervals.. I don't think every 6 months is enough for some..and then people saying they have the all clear..

Only way your all clear is if you are tested but leave a good few months between any sexual contact and then get tested

Testing is a bit like an mot only done in arrears.. i.e. only valid on the day of the test and actually testing previous to the test...

I go every 4 to 6 weeks... Sometimes more frequently with times of celibacy if there have been incidents..

I certainly wouldn't like to go 6 months without a test.. imagine how many people by association you could have been in contact with.

So how safe am I... I'm as safe as I am happy with, knowing all the facts, same weighing up everything."

We agree with you, we only started getting tested about three and a half years ago and try to get a retest after most meets now.

Do you think as "Swingers" (hate that word) we should all ask to see up to date proof of test results before play? Would that make our comunity safer? We are all sleeping with each other in a way and we should protect one another.

Sorry it's such a grim and un-erotic subject but in light of the shake up in the L.A porn industry we think its worth thinking at least a little about.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I think everyone should be responsible for their own sexual health. That means regular testing, condoms etc, and notification if there is an 'incident'. I can't make others get tested, and I can't force them to fess up to anything they may have caught, therefore I have to rely on myself.

If I worried too much about it I'd never meet! The only 100% safe sex is no sex. As I want sex, I have to take a calculated risk.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most clinics charge for certificates.. some will send a text message but it's still not proof.

Some people also get tested too soon after risky play.. then think they are clear.

To be honest as long as people are getting tested that's one thing...

I am sometimes amazed when people say things like they are clean as they always use protection..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best form of safe sex would have to be not telling a girl where you live

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get tested every 3mnth, more often if there's been an "accident"

I like to be safe x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilthygorgeous1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

"Checked every 3 mths. And now go together with my FB. And we're booking in for the hep B jabs next week on the advice of the clinic. We told all about our activities - they were as non judgemental as every clinic I've ever used and it'll be a date in the diary from now on for both of us to go together!

Can't see why anyone on site wouldn't! "

Yes we find the whole G.U clinic experience really painless apart from the needles that is. Also it's nice to be open about what we do without being judged. Was funny watching Mrs FG squirm the first time we went after a big party as she explained how many women she had played with

Good to see you are taking charge

We recommend the Hep-B course for everyone.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If anyone has to have regular blood tests for anything else ask if you can have screening done at the same time.

Due to being very needle phobic.. I get all my blood tests done at the same time... But then go for the swabs etc same day but different place.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ibanditMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I find the attitude of some people who reckon they're definitely clean and won't get checked up completely irresponsible.

Things like chlamydia and gonorrhea don't necessary present symptoms in everyone and they could be unwittingly spreading it about.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ibanditMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

*necessarily

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I go on mass with all my work colleagues every three months. It gets you a morning off work and the banter in the waiting room is awesome . Our clinic has recently told us they will only do bloods every 6 months now due to cost, which I think is ridiculous. "

Now you have got up curious as to your job.....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *atelotmanMan
over a year ago

Chatham

As a diabetic I have blood test every 3 months,my doctor know about my life style.So makes sure part of the test also covers STIs.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was funny watching Mrs FG squirm the first time we went after a big party as she explained how many women she had played with

Along similar lines L lost her bottle when they asked why she was there the first time and didn't quite tell the truth. I then went in and told them exactly why I was there.

The Doc got up, left the room and dragged L back from the waiting room to tell her now they knew the real reason they needed to do a wider set of tests.

She was a bit embarrassed

Much easier the next time as it is on the records anyway

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eddonistikMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Perfectly healthy guy here and don't need tests to prove it

Oh a virgin then

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rMrsAdriaCouple
over a year ago

Gosport

How many of you guys & girls use dental dams for oral

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ibanditMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

"How many of you guys & girls use dental dams for oral

My guess is very few - they don't sell them in Tesco, lol. Plus it's not very erotic. Which is why it's so important to go to the GUM for a sexual health MOT every few months.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *exxifun5Couple
over a year ago

NORWICH

We went this week for ours and was surprised when tom went in (as they see male and female separate) he was asked millions of questions .. but when I went in I was just asked had I had unprotected sex and that was it ... and then told to do my swab ... I was bit gutted as I was all ready with my speech and being open and honest but didn't get the chance !

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/09/13 23:35:43]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now you have got up curious as to your job....."

Lol I thought the uniform gave it away. But if you can image 20 squaddies tipping up at the gum clinic, and taking the piss about who's got what, then you get the idea x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure if it was good or bad when the nurse said " I remember you from last time

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was funny watching Mrs FG squirm the first time we went after a big party as she explained how many women she had played with

Along similar lines L lost her bottle when they asked why she was there the first time and didn't quite tell the truth. I then went in and told them exactly why I was there.

The Doc got up, left the room and dragged L back from the waiting room to tell her now they knew the real reason they needed to do a wider set of tests.

She was a bit embarrassed

Much easier the next time as it is on the records anyway

I cannot believe that this actually happened.....from what i've seen of the GUM clinic they are very professional and patient confidentiality is paramount. If this really did happen, it is shocking

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

"I think everyone should be responsible for their own sexual health. That means regular testing, condoms etc, and notification if there is an 'incident'. I can't make others get tested, and I can't force them to fess up to anything they may have caught, therefore I have to rely on myself.

If I worried too much about it I'd never meet! The only 100% safe sex is no sex. As I want sex, I have to take a calculated risk. "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What really annoys me is the attitude a lot of people have towards people who do catch something.

In the vanilla world its bad enough but I couldn't believe the attitudes some swingers have towards people with STIs in the community.

You can do everything possible to be safe and still catch something.

Looking down at people who do and are open about it will only make the problem worse because those people are less likely to be honest in the future with previous partners if they have caught something.

It may not be very nice, but surely our attitude should be that it is just "one of those things" that can't be helped if you have taken every precaution.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I worried too much about it I'd never meet! The only 100% safe sex is no sex. As I want sex, I have to take a calculated risk.

I'd have to say if you're really that worried then get another hobby.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nnyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

" ......

It may not be very nice, but surely our attitude should be that it is just "one of those things" that can't be helped if you have taken every precaution.

It SHOULD be but, as I've said before, some folks need someone to feel better than and how often and why you get checked is good enough ammo for that.

One thing, the HIV lobby is going hard on. 'this is no longer a death sentence' - which might or might not be the case but it leaves a bit of wriggle room for those who are less than sensible.

Not wise.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilthygorgeous1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

"What really annoys me is the attitude a lot of people have towards people who do catch something.

In the vanilla world its bad enough but I couldn't believe the attitudes some swingers have towards people with STIs in the community.

You can do everything possible to be safe and still catch something.

It may not be very nice, but surely our attitude should be that it is just "one of those things" that can't be helped if you have taken every precaution.

Very true!! I think the key is if you do/have caught something you need to be responsible enough to let any partners you have played with (not just recently) know so they can not only get screened but also let anyone they've played with on so on.

Anyone that ignores any symptoms or caries on playing knowing they have something is selfish and a threat to everyone in the scene.

We would be much happier if someone warned us rather than becoming part of a problem ourselves.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was funny watching Mrs FG squirm the first time we went after a big party as she explained how many women she had played with

Along similar lines L lost her bottle when they asked why she was there the first time and didn't quite tell the truth. I then went in and told them exactly why I was there.

The Doc got up, left the room and dragged L back from the waiting room to tell her now they knew the real reason they needed to do a wider set of tests.

She was a bit embarrassed

Much easier the next time as it is on the records anyway

I cannot believe that this actually happened.....from what i've seen of the GUM clinic they are very professional and patient confidentiality is paramount. If this really did happen, it is shocking

Believe me that is exactly what happened. They didn't announce why she had been called back. But they did call her back for extended tests. And if you think about it it was professional as they were looking after her health and ensuring the right tests were done.

The embarrassment stemmed from having them know she was embarrassed enough to have not quite told them why she was there. But they were cool about jt and we had a good laugh about it afterwards.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilthygorgeous1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Oxford

We're not worried! just a little curious as to how many other people genuinely give the subject any thought or even bother getting screened as It's not usually something that's brought up at a meet due to it being a bit of a turn off.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

[Removed by poster at 27/09/13 09:36:41]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread