FabSwingers.com forum: Verifications

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Lets be honest if you have been on this site for over 6 months and have no verifications whats the point on being on here? Its not difficult to get photo verified (allthough thats open to abuse)or even get verified by someone you have been chatting to, so why do people have profiles on here without verifications.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

combination of things is my guess , maybe they dont go to socials , only time they go into chat is to try and arrange a meet , they work away from home , they struggle to find anyone meeting their requirements , they dont put any effort in , they have had doubts over the whole thing who knows

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

they are fair comments, however the longer you have been on here with no sort of verification the more dubious your profile appears and the more difficult it will be to meet anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"they are fair comments, however the longer you have been on here with no sort of verification the more dubious your profile appears and the more difficult it will be to meet anyone. "

No not really,we met someone who had been on this site longer than 6months and had never been verified so dont agree with what you say.

We have never been photo verified either but that does not mean we are not genuine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And there isnt a time limit on here that you must have a meet within a certian amount of time or you are not genuine.

Like it has been pointed out there could be a number of reasons someone has not been verified,it does not make them fakes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there are exceptions to almost every rule.

The rule of "putting your head in a fire" still has little exceptions to being painfull and a little dangerous

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By *aravancoupleMan
over a year ago

A Secret Hideaway In the caravan of love

"they are fair comments, however the longer you have been on here with no sort of verification the more dubious your profile appears and the more difficult it will be to meet anyone.

No not really,we met someone who had been on this site longer than 6months and had never been verified so dont agree with what you say.

We have never been photo verified either but that does not mean we are not genuine."

WE agree with you we were on here 9 months before we met some one and got verified.

We have never been photo verified either.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree, we have no photo verification ,but as you can see on our profile ,we have met quite a few lovely couples and women and we are very genuine and do meet for real.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must admit Im always a little dubious of people who have been on here a period of time without verifications ... but then like its been pointed out there is sometimes very good reasons for this

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

could also be that they have met, but the other party doesn't give verifications

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"they are fair comments, however the longer you have been on here with no sort of verification the more dubious your profile appears and the more difficult it will be to meet anyone.

No not really,we met someone who had been on this site longer than 6months and had never been verified so dont agree with what you say.

We have never been photo verified either but that does not mean we are not genuine."

We also met someone that had been on here longer than 6 month with no verifications, met a few times since too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we must admit we are always a bit suspicious when we get contacted by someone who has been on over 6 months without verifications- we never accept friends invites from them unless they are prepared to have a fem to fem phone chat first- more often than not thats the last we hear from them so maybe our suspicions were right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

im suspicious of anyone longer than 6 months and no verifications or photos and in a massive friends list and the alarm bells go!

iv never been photo verified and i dont show my own verifications unless its to confirm am not a bloke with moobs and great taste in underwear!! xx

ps yes double standards are me!! xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

people should and do set there own pace as swinging goes,lots of people on here join fab to build there way up to swinging,so if it takes 6 months or a year every1 does it at there own speed!!

so as for verifications they maynot go to clubs like to cam i dont,they may not have had meets every1 has to have a first.but i do think people should have at least 1 face pic of each other if nothing more.we all like to know who is contacting us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I must admit Im always a little dubious of people who have been on here a period of time without verifications ... but then like its been pointed out there is sometimes very good reasons for this "

well i have verifys - and we r close xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Must admit, that does concern me where there are no verifications but i do have a chat with someone, i can often then sense whether they are okay or not I'm more concerned where one guy has one verification dating back almost a year but claims to have had a couple of meets, when i said why hadnt they left a verification, he said because hed asked them not to? So add that to the fact that the women who verified him last year (just a social meet not sex)couldnt actually remember him, makes me a little wary of meeting him, lets face it i'd like a memorable time, not unforgettable

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Lets be honest if you have been on this site for over 6 months and have no verifications whats the point on being on here? Its not difficult to get photo verified (allthough thats open to abuse)or even get verified by someone you have been chatting to, so why do people have profiles on here without verifications.

Like you have said... it's easy to get verified just by chatting to someone... so verifications mean feck all really don't they.

Couples who are thinking about swinging and want to take their time to work out what they want/feel comfortable trying ... do you think they also need to meet this 6 months or what's the point thing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is no 'requirement' to be verified, so cannot see what the problem is really.

If someone doesn't wish to be verified then surely that is up to them. If they suffer not having many / any meets by not being verified then the only people who are affected are themselves, so once again, don't see the problem.

But what would you rather see - someone who isn't verified or someone with a list as long as your arm: 'verified by phone' / 'verified by webcam' ? tbh both of those are as much use as nothing at all so far as we're concered

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

Some people, especially newbies are extremely nervous about taking the first step, it can take months and months of confidence building before they find the confidence to meet, so, not every profile has a question mark over them.

It's happened to us twice where “newbies” have backed out at the last minute

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Not everyone only uses one site as their source of fun.

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By *entadreadMan
over a year ago

Essex

I do not believe verifications are the ultimate way to judge whether someone is genuine or not. I have met people with no verifications and have turned down the offer of writing one about them.

I only accepted a verification in order to post on forums.

I prefer surprising my meets, and those that do not meet me because I do not have verifications, well, there are worse things that can happen.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Gut instinct for us.

We don't need verifications to make a decision of wether we like someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As we all have different taste what someone else thinks about a member means nothing to me.

I don't want to meet "hardened" swingers or people who are verified by so many people I get RSI or fall asleep before I get to the end. I've met people with no verifications who've been a delight and I play with and I've met some with verifications that I wouldn't touch with someone elses barge pole that made me wonder what sad, deluded fool verified them. But the reality is they probably acted differently and it could be me!

We all have different methods in choosing playmates: personally verifications is not top of the list for me.

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By *uton_coupleCouple
over a year ago

luton

some people might not want verifications on there profile even if they had them to put on

just because they are a swinger doesnt mean they should have a list of conquests on the back of there T shirt as they stroll around town ( this site )

also theres been many people on here who have said how ridiculous it is to hold up a piece of paper saying this is me to be photo verified / seems nuts to me

if we had no verifications im sure we would still get mail

i would say one thing though , if you are a single male you should do all you can to promote yourself , and that would be by verifications

having said that we have met males that have not been verified

verifications in some ways can be detramental , as one looks at all the profiles of the people a person has met they might have fetishes etc that you might find distastefull , and that might put you off meeting the person , or indeed might say they indulged in a certain act with them also putting you off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we really like verifications as it gives us a chance to say how lovely the people we have met and are friends with are - far from bragging about conquests a couple are from people we are just very honoured to call great friends and we havent played with - we like reading them as its nice to have someones opinion of someone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"and I've met some with verifications that I wouldn't touch with someone elses barge pole"

Excellent Sassy!

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"they are fair comments, however the longer you have been on here with no sort of verification the more dubious your profile appears and the more difficult it will be to meet anyone. "

Lol why are they dubious? Some people hide their verifications (for whatever reason). Also let's say you have been on here for 6 months but due to whatever reason you don't get much time to play. However you have had 2 meets in that 6 months and got 2 verifications. Then the people who you met and verified you delete their profiles and leave the site. When they delete thier profile the verification they gave you also gets deleted. So you have now been on the site for 6 months but no longer have verifications on your profilr thus leaving you looking dubious.

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By *arandjasCouple
over a year ago

glasgow

must say, hubby and i are relatively new to this and have a couple of verifications on our profile and are photo verified, which we done because i for one wouldnt be keen to meet someone who had no verifications on their profile, but it isnt the be all and end all for us, if we had chatted to them either by phone or in chat rooms it wouldnt matter to us if they had no verifications, but that is just me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You can still be verified and not have to publish it on your profile, however as suggested verifications can be misleading (especailly photo ones) but I believe they are the best way to judge somebody before you meet them. It cant be any coincedence that the more active people on here have a number of verifications. I realise that there are exceptions to every rule but in my experience the majority of older profiles without them appear dubious and in most cases are either fake or timewasters

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"You can still be verified and not have to publish it on your profile, however as suggested verifications can be misleading (especailly photo ones) but I believe they are the best way to judge somebody before you meet them. It cant be any coincedence that the more active people on here have a number of verifications. I realise that there are exceptions to every rule but in my experience the majority of older profiles without them appear dubious and in most cases are either fake or timewasters"

Then use your gut instinct and avoid those profiles.

Some of us don't mind no verifications.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I do now, but i must admit was a bit naive at first

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"I do now, but i must admit was a bit naive at first

Probably like all of us....but we all figure it out in the end what suits us

I would still say though that we have met people without verifications and they sure were real

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

Surly the only verifications worth having are the ones that say “I/we have met”.

Not all people that meet leave feedback, and I for one have only ever asked for verification once and that was on another site.

Does the fact that I have only one verification after nearly a year mean I am iffy, or does it mean that I only appeal to a small number of people because I am looking for something more than 1 night only notch on the bedpost and move on swinging.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Not all people that meet leave feedback, and I for one have only ever asked for verification once and that was on another site.

It means neither, it just helps to prove that you are genuine. I hate asking hypothetical questions lol, but would you rather meet someone who is verified (meet in person) or someone who is not but has been on here for over 6 months?

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By *woBiTwoCouple
over a year ago

north manchester

Must admit, as newcomers to Fab, we find some of the biblically extensive lists of verifications (and friends!) a bit daunting!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yes some of the verifications are a bit OTT, but its a good indicator on how genuine someone is

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

“but would you rather meet someone who is verified (meet in person) or someone who is not but has been on here for over 6 months?”

To be honest I have not given it any real thought, after all human nature being what it is people will only publish thing that they think make them look good so when I look at verifications and friends lists all I do is check ages and types (couples/males/females/tvs). After that I make my own mind up.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Fair commment, maybe iam a bit to cynical but sometimes you have to be on here

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"Fair commment, maybe iam a bit to cynical but sometimes you have to be on here

Thats very true,we always use gut instinct,never take any of it too seriously and if anything no matter how small gets my alarm bells ringing then we go no further............it works well for us

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By *eprobatepairCouple
over a year ago

london

"they are fair comments, however the longer you have been on here with no sort of verification the more dubious your profile appears and the more difficult it will be to meet anyone.

We were verified by a playmate who then left the scene due to a new relationship, she deleted her profile and so too our verification.

Not everyone wants to meet or have all and sundry know who they have played with. Discretion doesn't equal dishonesty.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I never said it did, being verified helps you to prove who you say you are and in the long run helps you to get the most out of this site. Having no verifications will allways cast doubt, whether thats right or wrong is debatable but for most people it is a fact.

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By *eprobatepairCouple
over a year ago

london

"I never said it did, being verified helps you to prove who you say you are and in the long run helps you to get the most out of this site. Having no verifications will allways cast doubt, whether thats right or wrong is debatable but for most people it is a fact.

Fair comment. Experience has shown us that it can be misused. Can accept that verifications do mean that others have met you. But that's it. It is not necessarily a recommendation. The real issue is the liars and tiemwasters etc.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

True they are only one persons view point about another , but often the liars and time wasters are the ones with out verifications.

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

"True they are only one persons view point about another , but often the liars and time wasters are the ones with out verifications. "

LoL,

I have had a number of failed meetings where the only comment made to me as a couple has done a runner is “you are just like your profile”, I have also had many couples and single guys contact me saying “we are/ I am Bi” but their profiles say strait. Honesty seems to be in short supply, as a result I now contact everyone that sounds or looks good to me (most come to nothing and that is fair enough), but I am more lightly to trust those that say they are male bi bareback players as they place themselves beyond the pail for many.

We all need to realise that adds here are like second hand car adds, most exaggerate, few point out faults and many are downright lies. So when you go shopping remember “caveat emptor” and ask for a test ride! LoL

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

lol i cant realy argue with any of that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always been a firm believer that anyone who fails to take any profile or any picture or any verification on here with a big pinch of salt is inevitably heading for a fall

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By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

"Always been a firm believer that anyone who fails to take any profile or any picture or any verification on here with a big pinch of salt is inevitably heading for a fall

I seem to be following you around today agreeing with you!!! There, your own personal stalker!!! lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

verification to say they are genuine and decent...yes i look for that

Verification to say how goood they r in bed or what a good ride they were.......means nowt........would rather see for myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Always been a firm believer that anyone who fails to take any profile or any picture or any verification on here with a big pinch of salt is inevitably heading for a fall

I seem to be following you around today agreeing with you!!! There, your own personal stalker!!! lol"

Being stalked by you pair, now that would be tough to bear

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't be too hasty about knocking the verification system on here. It is probably the single most important reason for the mass migration from another Swinging web site community over the last 18 months or so.

The other site claims to have more than a million members - but can't say how many are active nor how many are genuine people.

Must agree that it should be used just to verify that they are who they claim to be and not how reliable or good in bed they are.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I'd sooner meet someone because I have spoken to them and suss'ed them out for myself rather than rely on what someone else said about them in the past... even if it was last week.

In the past I have met and verified people who then went on to mess me and other people around... no-shows, timewasting and so on.

I have met people who had verifications saying "wow.. so sexy and great in bed"... they weren't!

At best ALL a (meeting in person) verification can tell you is they met that person in the past. Who knows how many people they fucked-about between the verifications? New day, new chance for them to be a tosser

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

PS... if someone really wanted to... what's to stop them having a second profile, getting verified by cam or phone and then verifying their other profile as meeting them in person? I think you'll find the answer is "fuck all"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course nothing stops someone from making another profile and verifying someone else - there is no fool proof system but there is also another way of looking at verifications.

Not only is it a good chance to say what you think about someone but it also gives you an idea of who they have met. We always look at the verifications to look at who they have met and look at their previous meets verifications too. It gives you a pretty good idea of what peoples likes and dislikes are. In order to have a good meet you tend to want the same interests and be happy with the same things. Some people like to socialise - some want sex straight away - most want a combination but surely knowledge is both power and equips you with a better idea of what you would like in the future and the opportunity if you so wish to try something different. For us it is more difficult to assess who we may like if we have less information rather than more.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"verification to say they are genuine and decent...yes i look for that

Verification to say how goood they r in bed or what a good ride they were.......means nowt........would rather see for myself."

couldn't have said it better myself....

I don't need to see a running comentary of what happened on a meet, all I need to know is that they are genuine! they showed up, they were nice people!

In fact really graphic verifications tend to send me running in the opposite direction.....

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Of course nothing stops someone from making another profile and verifying someone else - there is no fool proof system but there is also another way of looking at verifications.

But can't a person find out that knowledge themselves?

We never go on what other people say about anyone, in life or verifications, we like to make our own minds up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course nothing stops someone from making another profile and verifying someone else - there is no fool proof system but there is also another way of looking at verifications.

But can't a person find out that knowledge themselves?

We never go on what other people say about anyone, in life or verifications, we like to make our own minds up."

knowledge is gained in many ways but surely the more you have the better - obviously we all make up our own minds but the less information you have the worse in our opinion.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I agree, I just meant we find the information ourselves.....by asking the people when we chat.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

That is a very rash generalisation.

You have been on her for 3 months and have 4 verifications. Lets say in 3 months time you still have only 4 verications and suddenly all the people who verified you delete their profiles. When they delete their profiles you would then lose all your 4 verifications on your profile. So you would now have a 6 month old profile with not verications. Would you then suddenly like to be classed as dubious, fake or a timewaster?

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

Not all people that meet leave feedback, and I for one have only ever asked for verification once and that was on another site.

Everybody starts of with no verifications. We all have to get our fist meet and verification. If everybody thought your people would never get a meet.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

That is not true. Verications doe not always prove who you are. If you know what you are doing technically (in relation to IP addresses etc) you can make a few profiles and use the other profiles to give you false/fake verifications.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"I'd sooner meet someone because I have spoken to them and suss'ed them out for myself rather than rely on what someone else said about them in the past... even if it was last week.

In the past I have met and verified people who then went on to mess me and other people around... no-shows, timewasting and so on.

I have met people who had verifications saying "wow.. so sexy and great in bed"... they weren't!

Well said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/02/10 07:06:02]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not all people that meet leave feedback, and I for one have only ever asked for verification once and that was on another site.

Everybody starts of with no verifications. We all have to get our fist meet and verification. If everybody thought your people would never get a meet. "

I dont necessarily believe people with no verifications are 'iffy', I'm sure there are lots of lovely ones, but by the same token with the volume of messages that women/couples get here it's hard labour sifting through them all to find people we might want to meet.

Verifications are just part of our elimination process and we take them as a better probability that someone exits than if they have none and together with a well written profile provide a basic starting point.

Someone lying would be soon found out, as we wouldn't meet someone on the basis of verifications alone.

The fact we all have to start somewhere is irrelevant, the verification system exists and people will take advantage of it, if it didnt then enjoyment of this lifestyle would just be harder work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I agree, we have no photo verification ,but as you can see on our profile ,we have met quite a few lovely couples and women and we are very genuine and do meet for real."

yes but you have the green tick verification and the written ones so ppl know you are genuine as in most cases of non fab verifieds u just gotta be careful xx

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Verifications can also be highly flawed, we have people verifying others that they may have just nodded to or smiled at in a club or at a social.

Recently had two seperate verifications from guys who had seen me from a distance at a large Fetish party, they never spoke to me, they know nothing about me, so why would I post these verifications on my profile?

So many verifications can be taken with a large pinch of salt as far as I am concerened.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I agree, we have no photo verification ,but as you can see on our profile ,we have met quite a few lovely couples and women and we are very genuine and do meet for real.

yes but you have the green tick verification and the written ones so ppl know you are genuine as in most cases of non fab verifieds u just gotta be careful xx"

We are not photo verified on fab, we have just never got round to doing it, we do however have 64 verifications for real meets

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think half of them are tosh from people sucking up for a chance to meet again. I have seen some funny ones though on a couple of profiles. Maybe you should be able to rank people instead.

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By *eprobatepairCouple
over a year ago

london

"I think half of them are tosh from people sucking up for a chance to meet again. I have seen some funny ones though on a couple of profiles. Maybe you should be able to rank people instead."

The ranking thing was discussed ad nauseum on another site mentioned earlier with over a million members. It can't work in a practical sense as it is subjective beyond words. What is one person's meat is another person's poison. If you rank people it is open to the very worst kind of abuse. All a verification system does is say "Yes they exist" That's it. Anything else is open to debate and differences of opinion. If you say someone is great in bed, all that means is they did it for YOU. They might not do it for anyone else. And let's be really honest here, even within a loving couple sometimes sex is fantastic and another time it is not. You might do EXACTLY the same things on 20 occasions and 19 times it's amazing then the next time it's crap.

There is a difference between verification and recommendation.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"True they are only one persons view point about another , but often the liars and time wasters are the ones with out verifications. "

Popele with verifications can also be liars and time wasters. In another thread you admitted (and was also man enough to be honest and admitted it was wrong of you) that one time you lied to somebody you was intending to meet and also wasted that persons time by taking up a better offer.

Verifications are not a gurantee somebody is honest or that they NEVER waste other peoples time. Verifications just prove they have had meets and on those particular meets they did not waste the other persons time.

Surely you are not saying people with verications have never waated another persons time or lied and cancelled a meeting by making up some excuse why the meeting could not go ahead?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

True they are only one persons view point about another , but often the liars and time wasters are the ones with out verifications.

Surely you are not saying people with verications have never waated another persons time or lied and cancelled a meeting by making up some excuse why the meeting could not go ahead?

Thats a fair comment and your right verifications can be misleading but I still maintain they are better than none at all

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Don't be too hasty about knocking the verification system on here. It is probably the single most important reason for the mass migration from another Swinging web site community over the last 18 months or so.

The other site claims to have more than a million members - but can't say how many are active nor how many are genuine people.

Must agree that it should be used just to verify that they are who they claim to be and not how reliable or good in bed they are."

I would say maybe people are leaving other swinging sites for many reasons. They may joining this site because it has the verifications system but that would be naive. If you know what you are doing IT wise in relation to things like IP addresses it is VERY easy to make fake profiles and give yourself fake verifications.

I would suggest people are joining this site because it has lots of members, it is free to join and free to message people, the site not only has a way to message people but it has things like the forums, chatrooms, true life readers wife type stories, meet today options friendly people to have a bit of banter with etc etc

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Joined because friends told me it worked....

Stayed because it does work....for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not any more you cant,fab have stopped this now.

You cannot verify another profile from same IP address.

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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!

I suppose I`m very lucky in finding people who know me from elsewhere here, people who`ve known me socially for a long time. If it`s going to help me here, only time will tell.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"True they are only one persons view point about another , but often the liars and time wasters are the ones with out verifications.

Surely you are not saying people with verications have never waated another persons time or lied and cancelled a meeting by making up some excuse why the meeting could not go ahead?

Thats a fair comment and your right verifications can be misleading but I still maintain they are better than none at all

hi, if you want to quote someones post Mancandy, just click on "quote" and it will quote it for you, and everyone will be able to see which bit is yours.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We take verifications with a pinch of salt.

All they tell you is that someone has met the person concerned ( in the case of the meeting in person ones – the cam and phone ones are even less), they do not mean the person is genuine, nor does one persons view of them tell you anything at all about what your experience with them will be.

We will verify people we have met if they ask us to, but do not do so automatically.

We also keep our own verifications private.

There are a few reasons for this.

It is no one else’s business who we have met or played with.

We have in the past had a stalker issue where we had someone using our verifications as a means to keep tabs on us.

We find some verification comments a bit tasteless and so would not want others to see that on ours.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Ive been on here 2 years and still havent done a photo verification

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By *wned EmCouple
over a year ago

nuneaton

Verifications are a nice way for people who have met to give feedback to each other about how they found the meet. I know this can be done in a message but the fact it can be publicly displayed makes people think more about how they word the feedback.

I really value verifications we have had and although we don't always display them I get pleasure from reading them.

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z"

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

Constructive in who's eyes?

We all have our little ideas of what we like or don't like to see on profiles.....and we all have different ways of dealing with the ones that don't interest us.

Choosing to move onto the next one is a wise move in my book, as then it stops any accusations on a forum telling people they must be fake profiles if they havn't done this this this and this inside a certain timescale.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

Constructive in who's eyes?

We all have our little ideas of what we like or don't like to see on profiles.....and we all have different ways of dealing with the ones that don't interest us.

I thought these forums are here so people can air and debate opposing views, mine may be different to others, i personally value verifications, obviously some dont, doesnt make me right or them wrong , telling me to move on as a bit patronising tbh

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Then you are going to feel very patronised along the way as a lot of advice is why not move along and not let things wind you up.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Then you are going to feel very patronised along the way as a lot of advice is why not move along and not let things wind you up."

Iam far from wound up, I take on board advice, but it has to be constructive not just saying 'why does it bother you' move on, z. Having no verifications does bother me, and as you can see it bothers others on here aswell

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Of course nothing stops someone from making another profile and verifying someone else - there is no fool proof system but there is also another way of looking at verifications.

When people give you a verification you have the option to put it on your profile or not. You are only going to put the verifications you get that show you in the best light. Sure nobody is going to send you a verifications saying things like crap in bed, bad breath, etc as they know you would never in a million years would you put that on your profile.

As has been said verifications only prove (providing they are not fake verifications) that you have met other people. I am sure people on here have met people with fantastic verifications and after meeting them thought are all those people who gave you glowing verifications mad? Just because somebody has good verifications it does not mean when you meet them you will think the same as other people who have met them.

Surely the profile should give you the infromation about protential meets regarding things like the likes, dislikes etc?

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

I did actually ask why it bothered you - I'm genuinely interested in asking why - does it imply to you that it's a 'fake' profile and if it does then you simply move along to the next profile. I wasn't being patronising! Z

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Of course nothing stops someone from making another profile and verifying someone else - there is no fool proof system but there is also another way of looking at verifications.

Surely the profile should give you the infromation about protential meets regarding things like the likes, dislikes etc?"

I agree and maybe I should have clarified this in my OP, its not whats written in the verification that is important more the fact that they are verified. Iam not alone in this view, many profiles will ony respond to profiles that are verfied in person and if iam honest i will only email verified profiles unless they are new to the site

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Then you are going to feel very patronised along the way as a lot of advice is why not move along and not let things wind you up.

You are missing the point........yes, having no verifications bothers you and is important to others too......but equally there are people on this thread, including us where verifications are not the be all and end all.

You are allowed to have your say about it and what you do about them.........just like we are allowed to say what we would do.

Yet when people have their opinion you get uppity and tell them to not read the thread zzzzzzzzzz.........

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I did actually ask why it bothered you - I'm genuinely interested in asking why - does it imply to you that it's a 'fake' profile and if it does then you simply move along to the next profile. I wasn't being patronising! Z"

Ah, my apoligies i thought the z at the end of your post was refering to you being bored as in zzzzzzz, i should have realised it was your initial

.Tbh i base this on my experience in here, to many old profiles that are not verified have messed me about, i just get the impression rightly or wrongly that if you have been on here for over 6 mothts and have no verifications your more likely to be fake

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

"if iam honest i will only email verified profiles unless they are new to the site"
Being “new” to the site doesn't mean they've not been here before.

A “new” profile could turn out to be fake!

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Ah, my apoligies i thought the z at the end of your post was refering to you being bored as in zzzzzzz, i should have realised it was your initial

lol - you're probably right - i like to mess with the fakes actually it's good fun! Don't let things like that really bother me but I suppose we're all different. Z (not bored - it's my name!)

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

And that brings me full circle....we use our gut instinct.

If your instinct is saying those are fake profiles, then do what most people would do. move along to the next one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"if iam honest i will only email verified profiles unless they are new to the siteBeing “new” to the site doesn't mean they've not been here before.

A “new” profile could turn out to be fake! "

Yes it can, but i did say that it applied to profiles over 6 months old just as a rule of thumb I use, there are many exceptions out there but on the whole its served me quite well

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And that brings me full circle....we use our gut instinct.

If your instinct is saying those are fake profiles, then do what most people would do. move along to the next one."

I do move along to the next one, iam just highlighting my experiences. I realise you have to play devils advocate as your a moderator and my views may put people off the site but i have found that verifications an very important part of FAB.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

They actually have a point, if we thought everyone without a verification was fake we would ignore them, and look for people who do, not start a thread questioning why they are here.

Having said that when we first joined this site (previous profile sexoholics) we weren’t verified until our 3rd meet, because the 2 meets we had before then where with people who were not verified either so we couldn’t verify each other.

While we approach profiles, which are unverified, with some caution, especially after a certain time, it’s wrong of us to assume that they are fake and/or have never met anyone.

We’d also hedge a bet that a lot of people have/show verifications only because others expect to see them, rather than because they want to, call it peer pressure if you will, the reason this thread was started proves this point, because people rightly or wrongly have to justify or try to prove themselves before they’re accepted by others.

Always found it strange that when people have no verifications people pass them by, or decline an offer because they haven’t been verified, yet when they eventually get one or two, these same people will then contact them showing an interest, it’s like they want everyone else to do the hard work for them.

Use your instinct, it’s far better than any verification left by a stranger

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

They actually have a point, if we thought everyone without a verification was fake we would ignore them, and look for people who do, not start a thread questioning why they are here.

While we approach profiles, which are unverified, with some caution, especially after a certain time, it’s wrong of us to assume that they are fake and/or have never met anyone.

Use your instinct, it’s far better than any verification left by a stranger

True, iam far to cynical at times,

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"And that brings me full circle....we use our gut instinct.

If your instinct is saying those are fake profiles, then do what most people would do. move along to the next one.

I do have to keep reminding people we are members, and the only time I speak as a mod is when I get the whip out and wave it all about

As a mod there are some threads I won't get involved in so won't post on them.......but when I do post it is as a normal member and our view and our view only.

We always use our gut instinct.

I can understand why others use verifications as a starting point...we obviously have our own checks as starting points......but we don't go on just one thing, and ultimately, any meets we have are based on what we have found out, not what others have said.

Hope that clears up where we stand on verifications.......we are only speaking for ourselves, not the site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't believe you are having this debate about verifications. Is anyone suggesting that there should be NO verifications at all?

There is another Site completely full to the brim of fantasists, charlatans and weirdo's where a very vocal majority are dead against verifications but where faking and anonymity rule.

In our opinion, it is the verification that makes Fabswingers the best Site for people in this lifestyle. It is not perfect, nothing ever is - but it is a big head start from having to play a very cautious game with every single person you correspond with. With verifications, you can develop a bit of a picture to put you on the right track - but no more than that.

BIG THUMBS UP TO VERIFICATION FROM US !

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"And that brings me full circle....we use our gut instinct.

If your instinct is saying those are fake profiles, then do what most people would do. move along to the next one.

I do have to keep reminding people we are members, and the only time I speak as a mod is when I get the whip out and wave it all about

As a mod there are some threads I won't get involved in so won't post on them.......but when I do post it is as a normal member and our view and our view only.

We always use our gut instinct.

Hope that clears up where we stand on verifications.......we are only speaking for ourselves, not the site.

"
i have pics of rugby with said whip.................hehehehehe

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And that brings me full circle....we use our gut instinct.

If your instinct is saying those are fake profiles, then do what most people would do. move along to the next one.

I do have to keep reminding people we are members, and the only time I speak as a mod is when I get the whip out and wave it all about

As a mod there are some threads I won't get involved in so won't post on them.......but when I do post it is as a normal member and our view and our view only.

We always use our gut instinct.

Hope that clears up where we stand on verifications.......we are only speaking for ourselves, not the site.

Ok and sorry if implied that you were wearing your moderator hat

. Your right gut instincts will often be a better indicator than anything else and I shouldnt let bad past experiences cloud my judgement in the future

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

I don't think anyone os knocking the verification system itself and I agree that it's useful - just debating about profiles with no verifications after being here for a while - are they fakes etc? There are loads who have been here for over a year and are still not pic of personally verified - may be fakes, may be fantasists, may just be here to chat and be voyeuristic etc. Z

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't think anyone os knocking the verification system itself and I agree that it's useful - just debating about profiles with no verifications after being here for a while - are they fakes etc? There are loads who have been here for over a year and are still not pic of personally verified - may be fakes, may be fantasists, may just be here to chat and be voyeuristic etc. Z"

True, often a dead giveaway that maybe they are not for real is having an old profile with no verification that allways has the meet today icon on, but then again they might just get no responses

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

True, often a dead giveaway that maybe they are not for real is having an old profile with no verification that allways has the meet today icon on, but then again they might just get no responses

or they may get lots of response and they are all out shagging while we are deciding wether they are real or not !!

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

True, often a dead giveaway that maybe they are not for real is having an old profile with no verification that allways has the meet today icon on, but then again they might just get no responses

Yes true, I've had profiles look at us that are over a year old and no pic or personal verification - I wink'em! It either scares them off completely or they send a message - like I said earlier it's good sport if they're fakes but they aren't all bad 'uns! Z (not bored etc!)

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"And that brings me full circle....we use our gut instinct.

If your instinct is saying those are fake profiles, then do what most people would do. move along to the next one.

I do have to keep reminding people we are members, and the only time I speak as a mod is when I get the whip out and wave it all about

As a mod there are some threads I won't get involved in so won't post on them.......but when I do post it is as a normal member and our view and our view only.

We always use our gut instinct.

Hope that clears up where we stand on verifications.......we are only speaking for ourselves, not the site.

i have pics of rugby with said whip.................hehehehehe

lmao you snuck that one in when I wasn't looking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

LOL, I've been on here for ages now and although I was photo verified within a week or so of joining (I wanted to make sure I was happy with the site before doing it), I've never been verified by another member.

My reasons are simple:

1. I've never met another member in person yet. I don't play all the time, I don't want to meet people just to get a green tick (or flag or whatever) and I would much rather wait until the right opportunity to play comes along and that person happens to be verified.

2. I don't really use the chat room. It's just not my thing, sorry to say. I know loads of people find it great, and that's fine for them, but again I don't want to be doing something that isn't me just to get the tick.

3. I know I'm genuine. That may sound silly, but I am up-front and honest with anyone I do message on here, I share my face pic when I feel it is appropriate (i.e. when I think we might be getting to know each other better) and I've texted and spoken to people on here who I may play with when the opportunity arises for us.

One day I'll get a tick. Will it make me more genuine? No. Will it convince everyone that I'm genuine? I doubt it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"LOL, I've been on here for ages now and although I was photo verified within a week or so of joining (I wanted to make sure I was happy with the site before doing it), I've never been verified by another member.

My reasons are simple:

One day I'll get a tick. Will it make me more genuine? No. Will it convince everyone that I'm genuine? I doubt it.

But the question is : are you on here to meet people? I only ask this as you have the meet today icon on. If you are on here to meet people without sounding harsh your not doinG very well. However like you have suggested you are waiting for the right person, and good luck to you, but I do think you might have more success if your are werified

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, I'm hear to meet people, no that doesn't sound harsh, it's a fair assessment and yes, maybe I will have more luck if I'm verified.

What do you suggest I do about it though?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well the best option is to have a chat to some one, either online or probably better on the phone and get them to verify you. You come on the forums which helps prove your genuine, it may help

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By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"Yes, I'm hear to meet people, no that doesn't sound harsh, it's a fair assessment and yes, maybe I will have more luck if I'm verified.

What do you suggest I do about it though?"

Best option is to chat to people and go to a social event. There are lots organised here and you get to meet people socially. Not just one or two but a fair number. The ones who you get on with will verify they met you and your ok.

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

How on earth could someone verify you on the strength of a phone call?

What will you learn from a phone chat other than the fact that you are able to use a phone?

Verifications on here cover way too far many variations in my opinion, for me they should only be when you have actually met someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OK, I appreciate the feedback. Maybe that's the way forward...

I still don't understand though - why does chatting on the phone or online with somebody mean that I am somehow more genuine though?

"Well the best option is to have a chat to some one, either online or probably better on the phone and get them to verify you. You come on the forums which helps prove your genuine, it may help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I completely agree, I wouldn't verify somebody on the strength of a phone call.

"How on earth could someone verify you on the strength of a phone call?

What will you learn from a phone chat other than the fact that you are able to use a phone?

Verifications on here cover way too far many variations in my opinion, for me they should only be when you have actually met someone."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The issue of phone verification will be to suss out the single guys pretending to be a couple.

As a single guy you would probably need to physically meet people so that they could confirm your pictures, age etc.

Have to say that a single guy on here with multiple "in person" verifications would get a second look from us.

We get bombarded on t'other site but with no verification who is to say pics and info is for real - we just gave up.

A good looking guy on here who plays the system right I would have thought would have significant success but like anything in life you have to put yourself out and make yourself stand out from the rest.

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By *ombshellWoman
over a year ago

islington

i agree, almost all my verifications are thro meeting the person face to face and not by cam or fone, its the only way .. u cud be camming or chatting to any tom,dick or harriet lol xx

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

Not all people that meet leave feedback, and I for one have only ever asked for verification once and that was on another site.

Everybody starts of with no verifications. We all have to get our fist meet and verification. If everybody thought your people would never get a meet.

Someone lying would be soon found out, as we wouldn't meet someone on the basis of verifications alone.

The fact we all have to start somewhere is irrelevant, the verification system exists and people will take advantage of it, if it didnt then enjoyment of this lifestyle would just be harder work"

Ok lets go with you say. Say you are a couple and when you first join here you naturally have no verifications. However as couple you are the nicest and sexiest couple anybody would want to meet. Until you get a first meet people who only want to meet other people with verifications would ignore you. Thus creating a catch 22 situation.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

Not any more you cant,fab have stopped this now.

You cannot verify another profile from same IP address."

You miss my point. I am talking about people who know what they are doing IT wise. I know you cannot verify somebody from the same IP address. That just means you have to make sure you are doing it from different IP addresses which is VERY easy if you know what you are doing.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

Constructive in who's eyes?

We all have our little ideas of what we like or don't like to see on profiles.....and we all have different ways of dealing with the ones that don't interest us.

I am not being funny from what I have seen from most of the threads you have started you are either out for laugh and just prosint threads to wind people up or you are deliberatly trying to wind people up. Most of your opening threads are desinged to get a reaction in a negative way.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Then you are going to feel very patronised along the way as a lot of advice is why not move along and not let things wind you up.

Wow is I have said before we ALL start of with NO verifications. How would you feel when you first joined if everybody ingored your profile because you had no verifications?

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

Ah, my apoligies i thought the z at the end of your post was refering to you being bored as in zzzzzzz, i should have realised it was your initial

Then you are soooooooooooooooooooo wrong.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Can't believe you are having this debate about verifications. Is anyone suggesting that there should be NO verifications at all?

There is another Site completely full to the brim of fantasists, charlatans and weirdo's where a very vocal majority are dead against verifications but where faking and anonymity rule.

BIG THUMBS UP TO VERIFICATION FROM US !

No you can't how many times do people have to say verifications CAN be fake?

As far as I have read in this thread nobody has said there shuld be no verifications on the site. What people has said is if you go just by verifications you may get burnt because

Verifications can be false

Just because 10 to 20 people or couples found this womaan/man/couple to be great does NOT mean you will do so also.

Just because you have no verifications does NOT mean you are fake, a liar, a timewaster etc it just means you have not had a meet yet and that is f***all you be worrying about.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Then you are going to feel very patronised along the way as a lot of advice is why not move along and not let things wind you up.

Wow is I have said before we ALL start of with NO verifications. How would you feel when you first joined if everybody ingored your profile because you had no verifications?"

You realy do need to read my OP, as I mentioned its the profiles that are 6 months and older that raise suspicion

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

Constructive in who's eyes?

We all have our little ideas of what we like or don't like to see on profiles.....and we all have different ways of dealing with the ones that don't interest us.

On the contary, Iam posting threads that are a good talking point something that will provide opposing views, rather than the normal 'do you like anal; type threads. And to suggest iam having a laugh is quite patronising but I dont want to engage in a personal slanging match with someone i dont, but maybe your just reading my threads negatively

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

Constructive in who's eyes?

We all have our little ideas of what we like or don't like to see on profiles.....and we all have different ways of dealing with the ones that don't interest us.

"provide opposing views"..... and then you get all bent out of shape about it if people have an opposing view to yours.... its funny how you can invite debate, and then have a go at people who try to debate things!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

Constructive in who's eyes?

We all have our little ideas of what we like or don't like to see on profiles.....and we all have different ways of dealing with the ones that don't interest us.

I wasnt having a go at anyone, he suggested i was 'having a laugh' by starting this thread so was clearly 'having a go' at me, i was merely responding and defending my OP, and anyway if he is so against verifications and questions there validity why does he have one on his profile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mancandy, I think you take things too literal, or are looking to flame.

You seem to think that peoples differing views are having a go at you, example, Zoe suggesting to move along, I don't think was aimed specifically at you, but generally.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Mancandy, I think you take things too literal, or are looking to flame.

You seem to think that peoples differing views are having a go at you, example, Zoe suggesting to move along, I don't think was aimed specifically at you, but generally.

Your right, I did over react towards Zoes post as I jumped in without reading it properely but i did apoligies afterward, but ref to the other post, he did suggest i was 'having a laugh' which I wasnt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mancandy, I think you take things too literal, or are looking to flame.

You seem to think that peoples differing views are having a go at you, example, Zoe suggesting to move along, I don't think was aimed specifically at you, but generally.

Just opinions, that's what you ask for when you start a thread, debate means that not everyone is gonna think the same.

Don't take things so to heart, many a word is mistaken through type.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

Why should that bother you? If people aren't verified for whatever reason and you don't like that - move along. Z

What a constructive comment, if you dont like the thread move on zzzzzzzzz

Constructive in who's eyes?

We all have our little ideas of what we like or don't like to see on profiles.....and we all have different ways of dealing with the ones that don't interest us.

If I come across as trying to have a go at you I apologise. I am not a negative or vindictive person. It's just that if I see a post or comment I don't agree with I have to comment on it. Maybe I have some sort of OCD lol. It is all part of the healthy debate you go on about. A lot of people (myself included in some peoples eyes) make some ridiculous comments in these forums. To be honest I found your comment that if people are not verified after so many months they must be dubious, fake or a timwaster. I find that a bit a bit ridiculous and a rash generalisation.

My replies are meant to be part of a healthy debate. It just seems some people start a post but when they see replies they don't like they get annoyed or take it as some sort of personal insult.

I don't question the validity of verifications. The verifications are a good thing. What I am saying is verifications can be fake and should be taken with a pinch of salt. I am also syaing just because a person our couple has 20 verifications saying how great they are does not mean you will agree when you meet them. Also as I have said I don't agree with your comment if you are not verified after so many months that you are dubious, fake or a timewaster.

I only have one verification on my profile to prove I am real and I have met somebody and did not waste their time. I have met a few people on here and could have more verifications on my profile. I choose not to do so. I know a lot of people will disagree with me but I find profiles with 50,60 etc verifications off putting. It seems like some people are having a competition as to who can have the most verifications showing (maybe some people will think this is a ridiulous commment by me).

Again I know lots of people will not agree with me but I also do not see the point of having a really big friends list. I once saw a profile with easily 1500 - 2000 people on the friends list. Why? I doubt you could keep in touch with them all the time unless you spend about 18 hours on here every day.

At the end of they day it is only peoples opinions. Some you will agree with some you won't. Same for me. Some people will agree with my opinions and some won't.

As somebody once said (I don't know who lol) opinions are like arseholes. Everybodies got one and they often stink.

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