FabSwingers.com forum: Messages vs winks

By *stmate OP Man
over a year ago

Notts

I've noticed a lot of people don't like winks. I cant for the life of me understand why though. It's better than a one liner and can also be an ice breaker. If u get a wink and u reciprocate, I'm sure u will get more than one line back. Then there's the dreaded "no one liners" u take the time to put a decent message together and u don't get a reply back. What are your thoughts ladies and gentleman?

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

"I've noticed a lot of people don't like winks. I cant for the life of me understand why though. It's better than a one liner and can also be an ice breaker. If u get a wink and u reciprocate, I'm sure u will get more than one line back. Then there's the dreaded "no one liners" u take the time to put a decent message together and u don't get a reply back. What are your thoughts ladies and gentleman?"

Whenever I have winked back I've either been ignored or got a one liner in response. Tend not to bother much now.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

because for a lot of people a wink doesn't actually tell me anything...

it doesn't tell me if you bothered to read the profile, or if a finger just slipped...

no real effort in a wink either....... so some see it as lazy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we wink and message some people on here so fussy in just first contact really whats it all about if a guy wink at them in a bar/club asked if they would like a drink is a first contact/one liner come on peeps its a swingers site lets just enjoy and have fun xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree, mostly. I know if someone sends me a wink, they are on a fishing expedition and have not read my profile.I have winked at people who seem happy to receive them - and I have read their profiles so I know that for sure.

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By *eautyfuloneWoman
over a year ago

Tbh i just about get through my messages, i dont bother looking at winks really.

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

I don't have a problem with winks. Just another method of declaring some form of interest. In my case, they are usually followed by a message in my inbox anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If some winks us at us we will always have a look at them to see if we fancy them and if we do we will send a message. If we send a wink it means we like what we see

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By *un_JuiceCouple
over a year ago

Nr Chester

We love a good wink, if we return one it's a sign to say feel free to charm, bribe or trade

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By *stmate OP Man
over a year ago

Notts

Just because someone sends u an essay of message, doesn't necessarily mean they have read your profile. And people who ignore messages don't read the profile. They see the picture of who sent it and base their decision to read or delete on that. Come folks we we've all done it. Seems to be a case of "do as I say don't do as I do".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I don't have a problem with them but I only look at them if its very quiet ! And don't wink back very often ! Because I'm shy !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wink and a msg shortly after...a wink'll get the attention

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By *stmate OP Man
over a year ago

Notts

I think we need to bring winking back!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We like the use of wink. It shows an interest and is kinda flirty and fun. Definitely better than a message saying "hi"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cant understand people who wink then when you check out there profile they have no pics so dam frustrating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too many pic collectors and fakes on here, a wink is the safer option

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Just because someone sends u an essay of message, doesn't necessarily mean they have read your profile. And people who ignore messages don't read the profile. They see the picture of who sent it and base their decision to read or delete on that. Come folks we we've all done it. Seems to be a case of "do as I say don't do as I do"."

that a lot of anger.....

I think there is something you need to realise quite early from being on the site...

don't assume that everyone on the site see's something the same way as you, and respect the fact that not everyone see's something the same way as you....

lets call it "embracing the differences"...

so if someone doesn't like winks... and you do.... three words...

move......on.......by

there are enough people out there that will agree with whatever your viewpoint on a situation is....

just dont try to change those who don't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It really annoys me cause I look at my wonks and those im interested in il message with a friendly message, face pic and a nice how do you do and they read it and delete it.. I mean wtf was it genuine finger slip off two couples or them deceiding im not their type when im what they ask for in my profile :s

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't wink me, I don't read my winks. 154 unread winks, at the last count, and I am never gonna read them.

It's bad enough receiving 1-liners - winks are even lazier. They're the equivalent of "look at my cam" in the chatroom.

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By *heScotandthegirlCouple
over a year ago

London & Edinburgh

We often wink, if we get one back I always send a message, usually short but polite and take it from there, but of course this will not 'work' for everyone

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By *stmate OP Man
over a year ago

Notts

that a lot of anger.....

I think there is something you need to realise quite early from being on the site...

don't assume that everyone on the site see's something the same way as you, and respect the fact that not everyone see's something the same way as you....

lets call it "embracing the differences"...

so if someone doesn't like winks... and you do.... three words...

move......on.......by

there are enough people out there that will agree with whatever your viewpoint on a situation is....

just dont try to change those who don't"

I'm not changing anyone. It's a discussion. Take a chill pill dude.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I composed a message yesterday for a woman I saw on here, read the profile and she was looking for what I am as well. The message was deleted and she didn't even look at my profile, after that happens I just think why bother messaging now just wink and if they wink back I will message them, if not I will move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't wink me, I don't read my winks. 154 unread winks, at the last count...."

Delete them and stop counting.

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By *stmate OP Man
over a year ago

Notts

"Don't wink me, I don't read my winks. 154 unread winks, at the last count, and I am never gonna read them.

It's bad enough receiving 1-liners - winks are even lazier. They're the equivalent of "look at my cam" in the chatroom."

Question if I may? Do u respond to every message u get? X

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By *stmate OP Man
over a year ago

Notts

"We often wink, if we get one back I always send a message, usually short but polite and take it from there, but of course this will not 'work' for everyone"

My exact point, it's an ice breaker and its better than a one liner. X

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

"Don't wink me, I don't read my winks. 154 unread winks, at the last count, and I am never gonna read them.

It's bad enough receiving 1-liners - winks are even lazier. They're the equivalent of "look at my cam" in the chatroom."

Set your filters properly and you won't be able to receive winks from those groups you don't want contact from.

Also it is a one button press to delete all winks, if they annoy you that much.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We always check the profile of those who wink at us.

If we like what we see we either wink back or message.

Often send winks aswel as a declaration if interest.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"We often wink, if we get one back I always send a message, usually short but polite and take it from there, but of course this will not 'work' for everyone

My exact point, it's an ice breaker and its better than a one liner. X"

and at the moment... you are only listening to the side of the people you agree with... and angry at the people who dont agree...

not exactly "impartial listening now" is it.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always tend to send a message, and if no reply then I guess it's a no.

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By *lanwoodMan
over a year ago

Alton

I have a line in my profile that states "If I send you a wink, it means I like the look of you but don't wish to intrude with a message."

On that basis, I often send winks in the hope that the person/couple will at least look at my profile, read what it says, and hopefully send a message or a wink back.

Since including that in my profile though, I can't say that I have had any positive responses, so I guess they don't get as far as actually reading the profile or, of course, they don't like what they see.

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By *ucy and CarlCouple
over a year ago

Broadstairs

We respond to all winks and all messages. When we do we are generally told we are in the minority as most never reply. X

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By *lanwoodMan
over a year ago

Alton

"We respond to all winks and all messages. When we do we are generally told we are in the minority as most never reply. X"

I was very tempted to put that to the test!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A wink for us is just an initial sign of interest, to get the ball rolling so to speak. If they reciprocate, then we will send a message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have to say, I don't bother with winks, I much prefer a message so I know the person has actually made an effort!!

Winks are just lazy if not followed up with a message whether it be a one liner or not!!

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By *stmate OP Man
over a year ago

Notts

"We often wink, if we get one back I always send a message, usually short but polite and take it from there, but of course this will not 'work' for everyone

My exact point, it's an ice breaker and its better than a one liner. X

and at the moment... you are only listening to the side of the people you agree with... and angry at the people who dont agree...

not exactly "impartial listening now" is it.....

It's a discussion and i will agree with ppl who share my view obviously. One person said they don't entertain winks and I didn't tear into them, it's their opinion and I respect it. Not saying they should or shouldn't accept winks, I'm asking what their views are as I have my own on the subject. U haven't given ur opinion other than sit on the fence. Seems to me u are trying to please everyone by coming across as impartial. old tactics. As u said if its not for u walk on by.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer them to messages as an initial contact,saves time on both sides,im not the sort that expects a long drawn out personal message when most of what I get ends up being deleted anyway

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By *stmate OP Man
over a year ago

Notts

"I prefer them to messages as an initial contact,saves time on both sides,im not the sort that expects a long drawn out personal message when most of what I get ends up being deleted anyway

I'm so tempted to wink at u for scientific purposes lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A bit of both from me, but only if I fit into what they are looking for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Set your filters properly and you won't be able to receive winks from those groups you don't want contact from.

Also it is a one button press to delete all winks, if they annoy you that much."

Winks don't annoy me in the slightest.... I just don't read them.

And I have a good reason for not using filters.

The OP asked for opinons, and I answered. That's all!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It started with a wink...............on more than one occasion.

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By *andWCouple
over a year ago

Pontypridd

"I prefer them to messages as an initial contact,saves time on both sides,im not the sort that expects a long drawn out personal message when most of what I get ends up being deleted anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The wink is a nice way to show initial interest I think, but does seem as said a lot don't like it or ignore them.

I actually got an abusive message off a woman for winking her??????

I've learnt there's no right or wrong way it's just luck on the day. I've been winked and wrote a nice message in reply for it to get deleted??? As well as being winked by someone you've tried to contact before that again ignored me ?? Lol

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By *an and wifeyCouple
over a year ago

n lincs

if we like what we see from a wink we will message back if we don't like we don't message, not that we always get a reply back so not sure why some people wink in the first place but hey ho we just move on and keep smiling

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