FabSwingers.com forum: Married and wanting more

By *iss A xx OP Woman
over a year ago

chesterfield

I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!

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By *mallteaserWoman
over a year ago

Central

I have been doing it for about 18 months now, can be hard at times Hunni, please be careful. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's terrible.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont understand why you cant talk to him?

Before I got married I introduced him to swinging, I told him I couldn't decide on one breakfast for life and it was the same with men and women.

Being stuck in a relationship, where you feel the sex is lacking and you feel the need to go in secret behind his back must be hard.

I think you should talk to him, the worst he can do is say he doesn't want to involve others, leaving you no worse off than you are now.

We all know how rubbish it is when there is a lack of sex but do you really think doing things behind his back is good for you, him or your marriage?

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By *mallteaserWoman
over a year ago

Central

I know where your coming from, but sometimes we just already know x

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By *EXY50ishWoman
over a year ago

Anywhere and nowhere

Ive been doing it for 3 years. Im v v discreet and never meet locally or local men under any circumstances.

Discretions the key if honesty is a pronlem.

Honesty isnt always all its cracked up to be.

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

our loss sexy50 but i agree as long as shes careful why not

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By *mallteaserWoman
over a year ago

Central

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By *otwife CoolhubCouple
over a year ago

Bathgate

Why don't you just talk to him about it. You never know he might be up for sharing some experiences.

Fantasy role play in the bedroom might help broach the subject.

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By *mallteaserWoman
over a year ago

Central

Have tried in the past x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have tried in the past x"

Good where do I sign up for a meet

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

Well it's good to know there are women out there who are in the same boat as a lot of married men.

As has been said before, be very careful.

But enjoy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

This is my observation and not intended to be judgemental but have just read this and cant help thinking how sad it is that if you are only recently married you already feel bored. Maybe you should be focusing on why and how to put it right and whether your marriage works before worrying about something so superficial as swinging?

Sad too that it takes swinging to make you feel good about yourself which is how your message reads to me.

Wish you all the best whatever you decide x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It awful you should end this relationship or come clean, that is a stifled life for you and much much woorse for your oh.

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By *iss A xx OP Woman
over a year ago

chesterfield

We both met through a swinging site, settled down and now have a daughter together! I am honestly happy with my family just miss the buzz and the excitement of the unknown I guess!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We both met through a swinging site, settled down and now have a daughter together! I am honestly happy with my family just miss the buzz and the excitement of the unknown I guess!! "
imagine how your oh feels.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If this had been a married man asking the question.... The answers would be completely different, and the guy would hung drawn and quartered.

Why don't you talk to your new husband about how you feel and see if he wants to join in? Then you haven't got to creep around behind his back and risk him finding out and getting hurt?

If he doesn't want to join in, maybe you should have a serious talk with him and tell him how you feel?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Judging by the fact you are here, have friends and verified you already know what to do.

As previously mentioned if it were the male part he would have been hung drawn and quartered...

You go on to say you love him and are happy...so if you are commit to him and your marriage and get off here...

That is just my thought...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/06/13 08:10:28]

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By *utty_JiggleCouple
over a year ago

Black Country

"Judging by the fact you are here, have friends and verified you already know what to do.

As previously mentioned if it were the male part he would have been hung drawn and quartered...

You go on to say you love him and are happy...so if you are commit to him and your marriage and get off here...

That is just my thought..."

I have always thought that when I see posts like this it seems that it's more acceptable for a woman to cheat than a bloke..

Roles reversed... Op.. How would you react if he was doing this. Instead off you...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Judging by the fact you are here, have friends and verified you already know what to do.

As previously mentioned if it were the male part he would have been hung drawn and quartered...

You go on to say you love him and are happy...so if you are commit to him and your marriage and get off here...

That is just my thought...

I have always thought that when I see posts like this it seems that it's more acceptable for a woman to cheat than a bloke..

Roles reversed... Op.. How would you react if he was doing this. Instead off you... "

imagine you are reading him saying this in a forum how fun would that be you'd definitely get a buzz alright.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

23 and bored already?

My advice:

1 - Don't rush into any more MAJOR decisions.

2 - Don't treat your husband like a cunt.

3 - Become more self aware... starting with the word selfish.

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By *lk_DerbyMan
over a year ago

Burton

They are many of us in a similar situation. Well done to the OP for being up front. Yes, in an ideal world, then of course she would tell hubby etc, but reading between the lines, presume this is a no no. My only advice would be to be extremely discreet, and please be careful hun. Maybe, play with understanding couples, or those in the same boat as yourself. Have fun and enjoy !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!"

Have you tried working on things with your hubby instead of looking on here?

if you aren't happy with everypart of your relationship, you need to work on it or leave. you and him deserve to be happy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They are many of us in a similar situation. Well done to the OP for being up front. Yes, in an ideal world, then of course she would tell hubby etc, but reading between the lines, presume this is a no no. My only advice would be to be extremely discreet, and please be careful hun. Maybe, play with understanding couples, or those in the same boat as yourself. Have fun and enjoy !!"

As they met through swinging I can't see why she can't be honest, the fact many so called happy married ladies are on here playing with out the oh knowledge proves that women are no better then men, but get off lightly with it... as you can tell this post has hit a nerve for some reason.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is always going to be mixed opinions on this, i love my fella and there has never been boring sex between us, but i use to play away in secret until my fella came across me sucking a vwe guy on the net (its the pic on our profile) luckilly he was turned on by it, but im glad we spoke about it and now we are on here

But it could of gone the other way so just be careful x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a difference a vagina makes

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

If you want to sleep around but hubby cannot be involved and you have to keep it secret then you should be single.

I see no future for a marriage based on dishonesty.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

Op, if sex with faceless strangers who only see you as attractive enough to empty their sacs makes you happy and not the poor sap you exchanged your vows with last week: welcome to Fab, fill your boots!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A woman posts this and it recieves lots of good non judgmental advice which is how it should be. But if a guy posted this I have no doubt he would have been destroyed by now. Double standards me thinks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

I am glad someone pointed out what I was going to say....if it had been a man starting the thread he would have been hung drawn and quartered by now........

I am never going to condone cheating regardless of what gender you are.....and the justifications for doing it.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"23 and bored already?

My advice:

1 - Don't rush into any more MAJOR decisions.

2 - Don't treat your husband like a cunt.

3 - Become more self aware... starting with the word selfish.

I can't agree more. If you were male you'd have been vilified and treated very differently in the thread for bloody good reason.

Take a long hard look at things and if you really are unhappy, leave the relationships. You need an open, honest and frank conversation with your husband, if you met on a swinging site he's not new to this world. Options you have are involve:

1. involve him and swing as a couple

2. Split up and then you can swing as a single.

3. Suck it up and grow you, relationships and marriage are hard. Work on it and put right what's making you bored.

Talk about double standards on here.

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

"23 and bored already?

My advice:

1 - Don't rush into any more MAJOR decisions.

2 - Don't treat your husband like a cunt.

3 - Become more self aware... starting with the word selfish.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"23 and bored already?

My advice:

1 - Don't rush into any more MAJOR decisions.

2 - Don't treat your husband like a cunt.

3 - Become more self aware... starting with the word selfish.

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

cheating is cheating and wrong either way round. if im not happy bout anything in our relationship we talk about it. i suggest OP talks to hubby.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"What a difference a vagina makes

Indeed. I got slated for suggesting an m in an mmf was an extra man. Can you Adam and Eve it? *sigh*

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

I don't care what sex someone is cheating it cheating. If you met on a swinging site it's not like it'll be w huge shock to him so talk to the guy! Explain how your feeling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/06/13 09:03:37]

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What a difference a vagina makes

Very true, a bloke posting this would have been torn apart

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Walks in, shakes head at the hypocrisy on how differently an attached woman is being treated compared to an attached man; walks out.

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By *icked kittyCouple
over a year ago

Uttoxeter

"23 and bored already?

My advice:

1 - Don't rush into any more MAJOR decisions.

2 - Don't treat your husband like a cunt.

3 - Become more self aware... starting with the word selfish.

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By *irty RascalMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

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By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

"It awful you should end this relationship or come clean, that is a stifled life for you and much much woorse for your oh."
I just really could not disagree more... Nobody has the right to judge..especially here and on this subject... Love and sex.. Not the same and extremely individual and personal.

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By *lk_DerbyMan
over a year ago

Burton

Oh my my, this has really hit a nerve for some people. Think the OP wanted advice and not to be judged on the moral rights or wrongs and the sanctity of marriage etc.

Its an individual choice, and will repeat to be careful when playing. I personally choose to play with those in a similar position, and its my choice. Just trying to keep to the original topic as opposed to preaching from the altar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

I love how you tell it like it is!!

However, reading back thro the thread the majority of us actually said much the same as you tho maybe not quite so forcefully

The support, not surprisingly, came from those women who like the OP feel that it is ok to cheat on their partners as long as they take the necessary precautions not to get caught.

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By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

"What a difference a vagina makes

Very true, a bloke posting this would have been torn apart"
not by me... I have same standard f non judgement for everyone.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

..... And here comes that rubbish again, because that implies that all sins are the same

Slight difference in the real world between lying over how many biscuits you had, and shagging behind the back of the person you profess to love more than any other!

So many people playing away thinking that are bulletproof.... News flash... You're not!!

You know what it would do to your partners and the consequences or you would have had this out with them already...... So you'll have to excuse me if I save my sympathy for the true innocent party

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same views and opinions from me too, male or female.

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By *ovelybumCouple
over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

Sad too that it takes swinging to make you feel good about yourself which is how your message reads to me.

Wish you all the best whatever you decide x "

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By *irty RascalMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

..... And here comes that rubbish again, because that implies that all sins are the same

Slight difference in the real world between lying over how many biscuits you had, and shagging behind the back of the person you profess to love more than any other!

So many people playing away thinking that are bulletproof.... News flash... You're not!!

You know what it would do to your partners and the consequences or you would have had this out with them already...... So you'll have to excuse me if I save my sympathy for the true innocent party "

Knew you'd bite

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

I love how you tell it like it is!!

However, reading back thro the thread the majority of us actually said much the same as you tho maybe not quite so forcefully

The support, not surprisingly, came from those women who like the OP feel that it is ok to cheat on their partners as long as they take the necessary precautions not to get caught.

I know, it's the "take care hun, be safe" that annoyed me.

I don't play with married men, not because they have wives but because they can't play how I want. I've had married men ask me to shower in their wives favourite soap etc so not to leave scent trail, not wear perfume or her perfume etc...in MY house. As if...I could care less about cheats.

My point is the different manner in which the sexes are treated. Women: tea and sympathy, men: the gallows!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh my my, this has really hit a nerve for some people. Think the OP wanted advice and not to be judged on the moral rights or wrongs and the sanctity of marriage etc.

Original post:

"So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!"

Yes the OP asked for advice but given her statement above she also asked what people thought about her feelings/intentions in my opinion.

In an open forum people are entitled to express their thoughts and it is inevitable that some will be judgemental - I would argue that the OP's original post implied that she also judges herself - and believes that what she wants to do is wrong, why else would she have asked "am I a bad person".

It is also inevitable that there will be people for whom a post like this hits a nerve, does that make them any less entitled to voice their opinion?

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Oh my my, this has really hit a nerve for some people. Think the OP wanted advice and not to be judged on the moral rights or wrongs and the sanctity of marriage etc.

Easy to be that "ballsy" behind a computer screen.... Bet you wouldn't be quite as brash when staring the consequences of your decision making eye to eye.......

Bulletproof.... Oh but I am different.... It will never happen to me... Ect ect ect.. Pish,after nonsense, after anything that works to get let over... Right... Fair game?

I don't treat anyone differently because of the gender, they are only thinking of themselves and yet the ink hasn't even dried yet....

You can turn around and say there there there.... But us living in the real world save our sympathy for those who truly deserve it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

This is the 1st time I've ever criticised someone on a post like this so get your facts rights

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

I love how you tell it like it is!!

However, reading back thro the thread the majority of us actually said much the same as you tho maybe not quite so forcefully

The support, not surprisingly, came from those women who like the OP feel that it is ok to cheat on their partners as long as they take the necessary precautions not to get caught.

I know, it's the "take care hun, be safe" that annoyed me.

My point is the different manner in which the sexes are treated. Women: tea and sympathy, men: the gallows!"

And I absolutely agree with your point about "one rule for one sex ....." together with your reasons for not playing with attached men!!

I always look forward to reading your contributions to the forums and very often agree with what you have to say, evident from my own posts on this particular thread, I just love how you express yourself .... and take no prisoners

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By *irty RascalMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

This is the 1st time I've ever criticised someone on a post like this so get your facts rights"

Who said I was talking about you in particular. "Get your facts right"

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Oh my my, this has really hit a nerve for some people. Think the OP wanted advice and not to be judged on the moral rights or wrongs and the sanctity of marriage etc.

If that were the case then adding "and am I really a bad person" was a pretty stupid move.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

I'm with her on this one - succinctly put!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

I love how you tell it like it is!!

However, reading back thro the thread the majority of us actually said much the same as you tho maybe not quite so forcefully

The support, not surprisingly, came from those women who like the OP feel that it is ok to cheat on their partners as long as they take the necessary precautions not to get caught.

I know, it's the "take care hun, be safe" that annoyed me.

My point is the different manner in which the sexes are treated. Women: tea and sympathy, men: the gallows!

And I absolutely agree with your point about "one rule for one sex ....." together with your reasons for not playing with attached men!!

Thank you...I think!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

This is the 1st time I've ever criticised someone on a post like this so get your facts rights

Who said I was talking about you in particular. "Get your facts right"

As one of the regular forumites I assumed I came under that umbrella... May be more specific next time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Walks in, shakes head at the hypocrisy on how differently an attached woman is being treated compared to an attached man; walks out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Walks in, shakes head at the hypocrisy on how differently an attached woman is being treated compared to an attached man; walks out.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

This is the 1st time I've ever criticised someone on a post like this so get your facts rights

Who said I was talking about you in particular. "Get your facts right"

So do you not see a difference in the scale of sins then, or are they all the same to you? Genuine question.....Or were you just spouting nonsense for the sake of nonsense.......

So does lying over eating 2 biscuits instead of 1 actually equal sleeping with someone behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If this had been a married man asking the question.... The answers would be completely different, and the guy would hung drawn and quartered.

Why don't you talk to your new husband about how you feel and see if he wants to join in? Then you haven't got to creep around behind his back and risk him finding out and getting hurt?

If he doesn't want to join in, maybe you should have a serious talk with him and tell him how you feel?

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By *irty RascalMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

This is the 1st time I've ever criticised someone on a post like this so get your facts rights

Who said I was talking about you in particular. "Get your facts right"

So do you not see a difference in the scale of sins then, or are they all the same to you? Genuine question.....Or were you just spouting nonsense for the sake of nonsense.......

So does lying over eating 2 biscuits instead of 1 actually equal sleeping with someone behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other? "

If eating too many biscuits is your idea of a sin, you should apply to become the next pope.

I don't agree with the ops position, but that's for her to deal with. She asked for advice not chastising, so why do it.

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

"If this had been a married man asking the question.... The answers would be completely different, and the guy would hung drawn and quartered.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

This is the 1st time I've ever criticised someone on a post like this so get your facts rights

Who said I was talking about you in particular. "Get your facts right"

So do you not see a difference in the scale of sins then, or are they all the same to you? Genuine question.....Or were you just spouting nonsense for the sake of nonsense.......

So does lying over eating 2 biscuits instead of 1 actually equal sleeping with someone behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other?

If eating too many biscuits is your idea of a sin, you should apply to become the next pope.

I don't agree with the ops position, but that's for her to deal with. She asked for advice not chastising, so why do it."

Let's hope if and when you marry or are in a relationship your partner doesn't cheat on you...

I know from experience and its not nice...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You met on a swinging site so ask him if he want to go on one again. If not then let it drop and find about her way of getting a buzz, if he wants to go on a site then get on and happy swinging.

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By *irty RascalMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

This is the 1st time I've ever criticised someone on a post like this so get your facts rights

Who said I was talking about you in particular. "Get your facts right"

So do you not see a difference in the scale of sins then, or are they all the same to you? Genuine question.....Or were you just spouting nonsense for the sake of nonsense.......

So does lying over eating 2 biscuits instead of 1 actually equal sleeping with someone behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other?

If eating too many biscuits is your idea of a sin, you should apply to become the next pope.

I don't agree with the ops position, but that's for her to deal with. She asked for advice not chastising, so why do it.

Let's hope if and when you marry or are in a relationship your partner doesn't cheat on you...

I know from experience and its not nice..."

Sorry to hear, but as I said my original comment wasn't aimed at you.

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By *inful_coupleCouple
over a year ago

Frimley

No no NO! This is deceit! I WISH people here would stop condoning cheating. This is the swinging community, not the adultery community! How many liars and selfish people are messing other people around here? OP: Talk to him or LEAVE him. Don't have sex with loads of people behind his back then get back into bed with him. It's cruel and plain wrong.

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By *estless in batterseaMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth

So presumably you're doing this because you want to feel attractive and boost your confidence whilst getting some excitement... I shall say it once again, there's nothing more off putting than a woman with low self esteem and they are the majority on here #whataloadofshit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've met married guys before in our eyes its up to them what they are doing not us but agree with many posters if this was a man they would be ripped apart on her for saying this not given friendly advice. Such a double standard.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jeeze if this was a bloke posting he would be hung drawn and quartered.

Personally i find the post appalling. O p says recently married and now bored assuming you were not forced into it i wonder motive for getting wed in first place.

However just my view i do not really believe what o p saying as think it just a case of getting a reaction which clearly worked.

If married for ages i can understand boredom but this is wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This post so saddens me . My wife had a affair after 24 years of been married and left me . And now we have a lady who has recently been married asking how she can cheat on her husband without him knowing . Or am i just been bitter lol

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

"This post so saddens me . My wife had a affair after 24 years of been married and left me . And now we have a lady who has recently been married asking how she can cheat on her husband without him knowing . Or am i just been bitter lol

Not at all!! I totally agree. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with you so wrong of her I feel sorry for her new husband

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was a cheat, and regret having hurt my ex-hubby to this day, and do not wish to be labelled a home-breaker ever again.

All may be well if the other party does not find out, however, based on personal experience, the truth eventually comes out, as I could not look at myself in the mirror for lying to my ex-hubby for 3 months, and had to come clean about my affair.

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By *heScotandthegirlCouple
over a year ago

London & Edinburgh

"No no NO! This is deceit! I WISH people here would stop condoning cheating. This is the swinging community, not the adultery community! How many liars and selfish people are messing other people around here? OP: Talk to him or LEAVE him. Don't have sex with loads of people behind his back then get back into bed with him. It's cruel and plain wrong. "

Well said

At the risk of sounding naïve if you were both in to the scene before did you not discuss what marrying would mean for your relationship...? Was it a conscious decision to stop, why not discuss this with your husband.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

You met in the swinging scene yet you can't talk to him about getting back into swinging...It all smells a bit fishy to me..

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By *uriousBristolCplCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

"Strange, that when the word 'married' pops up in a forum title, the same people come on to chastise the op.

"May he without sin cast the first stone"

..... And here comes that rubbish again, because that implies that all sins are the same

Slight difference in the real world between lying over how many biscuits you had, and shagging behind the back of the person you profess to love more than any other!

So many people playing away thinking that are bulletproof.... News flash... You're not!!

You know what it would do to your partners and the consequences or you would have had this out with them already...... So you'll have to excuse me if I save my sympathy for the true innocent party "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You met in the swinging scene yet you can't talk to him about getting back into swinging...It all smells a bit fishy to me..

We agree!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This post is so wrong on so many levels ..Why marry the guy in the 1st place x

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By *rsIdiotWoman
over a year ago

Bedworth

Whenever posts like this crop up it reminds me just how lucky I am to have the sort of relationship with my husband where we are able to talk openly with each other.

Op, why not talk about this with your husband, he may surprise you. Mine did

It's much better for all of you if you play with his consent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all have different principles and should we make judgements on others?

The way people behave in their marriage be it after one week or forty years is their affair. All marriages have periods of doubt and secrets, it's about how the couple concerned cope with it. It is not about what others think.

Having said that it does not mean other people should ignore that fact and , if they do not wish to be involved with people playing away,that is their choice.

I don't mix with people who have different principles than me but I don't criticise them either.

Wow sounds like a lecture

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all have different principles and should we make judgements on others?

The way people behave in their marriage be it after one wueek or forty years is their affair. All marriages have periods of doubt and secrets, it's about how the couple concerned cope with it. It is not about what others think.

Having said that it does not mean other people should ignore that fact and , if they do not wish to be involved with people playing away,that is their choice.

I don't mix with people who have different principles than me but I don't criticise them either.

Wow sounds like a lecture

"
Maybe if it ever happens too you mate you will feel different .. Just saying

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By *aith boyMan
over a year ago

Worthing

the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"23 and bored already?

My advice:

1 - Don't rush into any more MAJOR decisions.

2 - Don't treat your husband like a cunt.

3 - Become more self aware... starting with the word selfish.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all have different principles and should we make judgements on others?

Having said that it does not mean other people should ignore that fact and , if they do not wish to be involved with people playing away,that is their choice.

I don't mix with people who have different principles than me but I don't criticise them either.

Wow sounds like a lecture

But... if people don't want others to talk about them they shouldn't mention their situation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't wish to overly judge a person I don't know, but I have to ask, why did you marry someone you clearly cannot talk to about 'anything & everything'?

Secondly, if you're recently married, why are you looking for sex elsewhere? It seems to me this isn't so much a moral question, but more one of judgement in your partner choice.

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By *etitesaraTV/TS
over a year ago

rochdale

"I was a cheat, and regret having hurt my ex-hubby to this day, and do not wish to be labelled a home-breaker ever again.

I was a cheat, as was my ex fiancée. Neither of us came out of it well and it was a painful process. Now i am with a wonderful woman who knows about and actively encourages my meeting with men as she likes to watch when she can, however i always ask her permission and never break her rules. Going behind someone's back never ends well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

Or nt gt got married

Sad too that it takes swinging to make you feel good about yourself which is how your message reads to me.

Wish you all the best whatever you decide x "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!..."

Just because its a swinging site doesn't mean the people are all cheats and liers and enem though I'm on a swinging site I have and never would cheated on anyone and I try to never knowingly play with attached people. Trust is the 1st and most important rule in swinging so if anything cheating us frowned upon more in this lifestyle then real world

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why did u marry him then if things wernt right in the first place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!"

sorry but that is wrong u shouldnt have got married a cheat is a cheat and i hope he finds out and leaves u

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!...

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!..."

Swinging yes. Cheating. Lying. No!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/06/13 12:13:28]

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!..."

No one searched the ops profile and started a thread on it. She saw fit to share on an *open* forum her boredom in her recent marriage.

People will have varying views when you ask for opinion: which she did. How you see it as being righteous is beyond me.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"It awful you should end this relationship or come clean, that is a stifled life for you and much much woorse for your oh."

Sensible words

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!...

No one searched the ops profile and started a thread on it. She saw fit to share on an *open* forum her boredom in her recent marriage.

People will have varying views when you ask for opinion: which she did. How you see it as being righteous is beyond me.

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By *ptimusDMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"If this had been a married man asking the question.... The answers would be completely different, and the guy would hung drawn and quartered. "

I couldn't have put it better myself. It is quite interesting how the OP is getting such empathetic and non-judgemental responses but do a quick search on the same topic started by a bloke and see the sort of vitriol you'll get.

That said, I appreciate the OP's dilemma and she should do whatever works for her. Fidelity is a concept that an overwhelming number of married people have failed woefully in adopting and for many it is not for lack of trying. It is the single most cited cause for divorces & also the cause of great misery and unhappiness for many who feel trapped in a marriage where they haven't got the opportunity to look elsewhere.

Providing a situation where there is a certainty that their partners can never find out, 89% of married people in a recent study said they will have sex outside their marriage at least once. A baffling statistic and if this doesn't show that fidelity is an unnatural state for humans to exist in, I don't know what else is.

But for now, while society haven't escaped the fidelity concept yet, we will just have to deal with it individually in the best way we find works.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

" Trust is the 1st and most important rule in swinging "

Also trust is teh first and most important rule of marriage or any long term partnership

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Op is being rather quiet don't you think?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I a agree fully with this.

The first step is to talk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!..."

It is only righteous to those who do not face up to their responsibilities for their actions, IMHO.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!"

It doesn't matter how you met if you can't be truthful and need other men to shore up your self esteem you're in the wrong place.

If you were a man posting this you'd have been hung out to dry by now.

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By *ouplefunukCouple
over a year ago

North Bristol

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!..."

Yes, exactly - a swinging site - not a CHEATING site.

Funny how the only people supporting the OP are married and cheating themselves. Stop trying to kid yourselves that you're swinging, you're not. There are websites for people like you and this isn't it!

*Her*

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

wonder how the op would feel if she saw a similar post made by her husband?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!..."

The OP posted and asked for opinions

To which they have received opinions.

The OP even asked herself if she was doing the right thing as she felt guilty

Yes it's a swinging site, it's not a cheating site!

Just because we are on a swinging site doesn't mean that we have no morals

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

How about.....don't cheat.

Revolutionary concept i know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How about.....don't cheat.

Revolutionary concept i know

I tried.. actually couldn't not do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"How about.....don't cheat.

Revolutionary concept i know

Tsk!!! Oh you and your outmoded ideas.

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By *aith boyMan
over a year ago

Worthing

[Removed by poster at 23/06/13 12:52:03]

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By *aith boyMan
over a year ago

Worthing

the point i was making was... i thought the married people had agreed to forsake all others.. whether or not the other person knows isnt what the vows are about.. your just one (possibly more.. you judge !!!) steps from her position... glass houses etc...

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"the point i was making was... i thought the married people had agreed to forsake all others.. whether or not the other person knows isnt what the vows are about.. your just one (possibly more.. you judge !!!) steps from her position... glass houses etc..."

As a married men happy to fuck other men wives whilst yours is sat at home, I wouldn't expect anything less from you!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Only if we married in church. Deceit and betrayal of trust are the polar opposites of what makes a good relationship and forsaking all others means emotionally.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Amazing how so many are advising to be careful, as others have already said if a guy had post this then the responses would have been totally different, yet it's the same thing, a cheat is a cheat!

Op be straight with your husband and stop living a lie

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By *win PeaksCouple
over a year ago

Northamptonshire

"So presumably you're doing this because you want to feel attractive and boost your confidence whilst getting some excitement... I shall say it once again, there's nothing more off putting than a woman with low self esteem and they are the majority on here #whataloadofshit"

I don't know who you guys have met but the people we have met either for play or social have been very confident. We find it's the ladies that take the lead. No low self esteem in our experience.

Dave

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By *win PeaksCouple
over a year ago

Northamptonshire

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!..."

Exactly !

A SWINGING site, not a married but cheating site. There are plenty of those on the internet, I have just looked.

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By *win PeaksCouple
over a year ago

Northamptonshire

[Removed by poster at 23/06/13 13:13:55]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe the OP enjoyed swinging because of the thrill she got from meeting new partners? Maybe she thought that getting married and having a family would be enough? It is odd that having met through swinging, the OP feels unable to discuss this with her husband. I'm married and know that my wife would not want to swing, having discussed it previously. If I were in the OPs position, a conversation would be a good starting point. Unless she doesn't want her husband to play?

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

I don't know who you guys have met but the people we have met either for play or social have been very confident. We find it's the ladies that take the lead. No low self esteem in our experience.

Dave"

To be fair, I've lost count of the cringe inducing posts from women saying they lacked confidence, felt men only met them because they couldn't get better, how they searched verifications to see the type of women they played with and if they were slim or attractive they didn't meet them.

There are a lot of women with issues here!

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By *win PeaksCouple
over a year ago

Northamptonshire

I believe that vow is only in a Religious wedding ceremony, not everyone gets married in church, so that makes you point invalid

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By *irty RascalMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

As marriage started out as a religious ceremony, anything else doesn't really count. Signing a piece of paper and declaring your love to a government official isn't quite the same.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"How about.....don't cheat.

Revolutionary concept i know

I tried.. actually couldn't not do. "

I'm sure you were faithful between meets though

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By *rsIdiotWoman
over a year ago

Bedworth

"As marriage started out as a religious ceremony, anything else doesn't really count. Signing a piece of paper and declaring your love to a government official isn't quite the same.

Wrong Wrong Wrong!!!!

The way I read your post implies that any marriage not taking place in a church is not a valid and real marriage.

I may have got the wrong end of the stick here and misinterpreted your post and if that is the case then I apologise. I find the statement you made highly offensive. Just because my husband and I chose not to be hypocrites and marry in a building of a religion tha we have no belief in does not make our marriage any less real or valid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As marriage started out as a religious ceremony, anything else doesn't really count. Signing a piece of paper and declaring your love to a government official isn't quite the same.

Oh dear

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!...

Exactly !

A SWINGING site, not a married but cheating site. There are plenty of those on the internet, I have just looked.

Have you ever been on any of these married but cheating sites though

because they are no where near as good as this one.

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

"As marriage started out as a religious ceremony, anything else doesn't really count. Signing a piece of paper and declaring your love to a government official isn't quite the same.

I got married in a Mosque but this was not recognised as a marriage. I had to get married by a registrar for that.

Oh, and I'm not a believer. Does that not count then?

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By *irty RascalMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

"As marriage started out as a religious ceremony, anything else doesn't really count. Signing a piece of paper and declaring your love to a government official isn't quite the same.

I got married in a Mosque but this was not recognised as a marriage. I had to get married by a registrar for that.

Oh, and I'm not a believer. Does that not count then?"

In the eyes of the mosque and it's followers you are married, but in law you have to sign a piece of paper in order to become 'legally married' and that's usually for tax reasons.

But as a non believer, hmmmm and someone earlier said I was a "hypocrite"

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By *irty RascalMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

"As marriage started out as a religious ceremony, anything else doesn't really count. Signing a piece of paper and declaring your love to a government official isn't quite the same.

Wrong Wrong Wrong!!!!

The way I read your post implies that any marriage not taking place in a church is not a valid and real marriage.

But you're on here as a single person, even though marriage is about staying faithful to your partner. Even if a partner gives permission to their oh to swing, they may only be doing it because they're afraid of losing them and secretly wish they didn't.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wrong Wrong Wrong!!!!

The way I read your post implies that any marriage not taking place in a church is not a valid and real marriage.

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By *lanwoodMan
over a year ago

Alton

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!...

Exactly !

A SWINGING site, not a married but cheating site. There are plenty of those on the internet, I have just looked.

Have you ever been on any of these married but cheating sites though

because they are no where near as good as this one."

This one is very hard work indeed for married men, like me. I have been trying for days to find a meet in the next few days. As has been said before, people seem not to mind if its a married woman meeting alone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!"

And you would be happy for your husband to be doing the same of course?

Recently married but not compatible, you thought a lot about marriage didn't you? If you loved swinging so much why enter into a non swinging relationship or do you enjoy living a lie and it has become a buzz for you to be getting away with it? You've obviously married the wrong person as you're not compatible, some people deserve a std

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!"

I think its really sad that so soon after marriage your feeling this way

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By *rsIdiotWoman
over a year ago

Bedworth

"But you're on here as a single person, even though marriage is about staying faithful to your partner. Even if a partner gives permission to their oh to swing, they may only be doing it because they're afraid of losing them and secretly wish they didn't."

Yes I'm on here as a single person and will remain so until the site gives me the option of having my status as attached.

Marriage is more than just being faithful. What about communication, love, respect, honesty and trust? In my marriage these are the most important things.

If being faithful were the most important thing in a marriage there would be no such thing as swinging and we wouldn't be here having this conversation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This post is so wrong on so many levels ..Why marry the guy in the 1st place x

Oddly enough I have often seen on my looked at list, 20 odd year old's with a single male profile and their status as married but bored, so works in the reverse and yes is wrong on so many levels, why marry someone you obviously don't love

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The Op is being rather quiet don't you think?"

Its Sunday so I suspect she is out having a nice family day have thrown a hand grenade into the wolves knowing what would happen

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

perhaps suggest an extra girl to play at first .. then a couple ... then maybe a guy ... your hubby might like the idea .. better than cheating

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

perhaps suggest an extra girl to play at first .. then a couple ... then maybe a guy ... your hubby might like the idea .. better than cheating

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By *un_JuiceCouple
over a year ago

Nr Chester

No compassion here because OP is female. None.

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By *usie pTV/TS
over a year ago

taunton

Sod the rights and wrongs of it go on and do it just don't go bleeting when you have to face the consequences you obviously made a bad judgement when you got married as have many of us my wife ordered me to the register office then wouldn't let me read the contract just made me sign wasn't until later I found out about the clause saying you will not have sex it is disgusting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Long thread this so haven't read all the replies.

My wife and I were recently going through a dodgy patch.

I saw it as "damn frigid woman" and she was seing me as "scruffy git,he doesn't care for me just wants sex"

I was getting realy, realy angry with the situation and started looking elsewhere... how I ended up on here

I love my wife and we have kids and the best option was to make what we have better. I got a book called "His Needs /Her Needs" and read some of that and am still reading it.

The last few days have been great. We put effort into helping each other out and treating each other like we did when we first met.

Last night was great. I gave her an hour and a half of massage, candles and all that

which was very well recieved. I am hoping we can carry this on and then get to one of the clubs as a couple rather than just me on my own with negative thoughts still in my mind.

Rob

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know who you guys have met but the people we have met either for play or social have been very confident. We find it's the ladies that take the lead. No low self esteem in our experience.

Dave

There are a lot of women with issues here!"

i have noticed an awful lot of women on here have low self esteem, i thought on a swinging site it would be the other way round.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you want to sleep around but hubby cannot be involved and you have to keep it secret then you should be single.

I see no future for a marriage based on dishonesty."

Well said, my thoughts exactly. If a married bloke had posted this he would have been torn to shreds.

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By *oulou45Woman
over a year ago

Bucks

"If this had been a married man asking the question.... The answers would be completely different, and the guy would hung drawn and quartered.

Why don't you talk to your new husband about how you feel and see if he wants to join in? Then you haven't got to creep around behind his back and risk him finding out and getting hurt?

If he doesn't want to join in, maybe you should have a serious talk with him and tell him how you feel?

"
Was sat here thinking the same

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

"My, my, my, well isn't this just dandy: giving the op support for cheating and the ink isn't even dry on her marriage license!

I've seen married men ripped a new one, verbally castrated, called every name under the sun, advised to go to Relate, the works. Not once have I seen "take care hun".

Two faced hypocrites!

Indeed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

hun im the same and i know what u mean if u want it go get it i love cheating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hun im the same and i know what u mean if u want it go get it i love cheating"
if I said that I'd be torn a new one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What a difference a vagina makes

Pmsl and oh so true !

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By *ohjaneCouple
over a year ago

south staffs

The thing I find so sad about this thread is that we are not just talking about a rift between the OP and her new husband. They have a daughter !

This kid has not asked to be born and certainly has not asked to be emotionally torn when the marriage breaks up due to lack of communication/ low self esteem/ boredom/ whatever reason might be the final straw.

Do what you want - male or female - when you are adult, free and single, but please think further when you have another life in the mix, who depends solely on you and your choices.

Jane x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!"

Do what you want, your in charge of your life and your the only one in your situation, lots of opinions here to read etc but your grown up, make your own mind up and don't care what others think x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hun im the same and i know what u mean if u want it go get it i love cheating"

You obviously have no morals or a heart if you openly admit that you love cheating. I've heard some disturbing things said on here but that has got to be the worst. You seem like a selfish sadistic person

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

"hun im the same and i know what u mean if u want it go get it i love cheating

You know an inate emotional detachment is a key feature of a psychopath.

Real human beings form real relationships with people based on love and trust, if you are willing to stamp all over that bond then you have some sort of deep rooted issues you need to address, both to the OP and this odd woman you quoted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi-I'm a legitimately single male who would be pleased to meet a woman regardless of her status/life outside of here. It's none of my business and I'm not here to judge anyone. I'm concerned so many people here have so much time to judge others-yikes!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi-I'm a legitimately single male who would be pleased to meet a woman regardless of her status/life outside of here. It's none of my business and I'm not here to judge anyone. I'm concerned so many people here have so much time to judge others-yikes! "

So you don't mind being a part of the reason why a family possibly with children could be ripped apart.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hun im the same and i know what u mean if u want it go get it i love cheating

You know an inate emotional detachment is a key feature of a psychopath.

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By *EXY50ishWoman
over a year ago

Anywhere and nowhere

Couldnt have put it better myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!"

Too many ppl in glass houses throwing stones on here. Have fun , stay safe ... You know what you want... Don't let others judge you x

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area

"Judging by the fact you are here, have friends and verified you already know what to do.

As previously mentioned if it were the male part he would have been hung drawn and quartered...

You go on to say you love him and are happy...so if you are commit to him and your marriage and get off here...

That is just my thought..."

Have to agree.. if it was a guy the posts would have been completely different and he would be well and truely hung by now.. (and not in that way lol).

I have to say i am shocked by the responses. Surely this is the same as if a guy was cheating...except guys don't worry about the woman they are meeting going behind her hubbs back like women feel about men going behind wifes back.

The worst part is that op is only recently married and feels like this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im cheating but its ok!! Im a woman!! Yeah grow up op!!! Annoys me as if this were a bloke he be destroyed by now!!!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"hun im the same and i know what u mean if u want it go get it i love cheating"

Good for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As the female half of the couple,.we went in this together, and play together. Im not going to judge the first poster, I just feel saddened that she feels as she does in a new marriage, when it should be one of the most exciting times of a newly married couple.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Erm...you did read the op right? You know, the bit where she invited comments? None of us would have been privvy to her private life if she'd not felt the need to share.

Oh...look up irony!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I'm married-recently married and I'm bored. I was into swinging big time before we met and now I just want to get back to but secretly- he can never find out!

I just want to feel attractive and that excitement again and man I miss what swinging and men did for my confidence.

So how do I do this without my partner finding out and am I really a bad person cause I feel awful but I just don't think about in too much!

Too many ppl in glass houses throwing stones on here. Have fun , stay safe ... You know what you want... Don't let others judge you x

Yeah, like we're all still brushing wedding cake crumbs off our wedding dress and confetti out of our hair to log on to Fab and the charming men on here who will tell us how beautiful we are...until they cum!

Nursery run, shopping in Tesco, paying the council tax are all fantasy, fucking strangers, yep that's real life!

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By *win PeaksCouple
over a year ago

Northamptonshire

"the righteous police out in droves.. must be good to be that good.. hang on.. it's a swinging site !!...

Exactly !

A SWINGING site, not a married but cheating site. There are plenty of those on the internet, I have just looked.

Have you ever been on any of these married but cheating sites though

because they are no where near as good as this one."

No I never have.

I am a swinger not a cheater, two very different things in my eyes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i met a man on here who had only been married for a year, people are human and they dont always do the right thing.

for one reason or another. i guess if i was a man and thought i could have my cake and eat it too i might be tempted.

not saying its right though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only the OP can make her mind up but as has been said on a number of occasions on this topic, if roles were reversed, there would be multiple people telling him its wrong to cheat on his new wife, and what an arse he was, seems its more acceptable for a woman to cheat,than a guy. Having said that each to their own, if i meet anyone im off the site, has happened before and if it happens again ill be hiding profile again, i would never come on a swinging site if my OH didn't know, all you can do is talk to him and take it from there,

good luck but cheating on him is not the answer in afraid

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By *mallteaserWoman
over a year ago

Central

Everyone is entitled to make there own choices and make up there own minds xx

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Do what you want in life but don't come on here seeking validation for your actions that you know will tear someone's heart into pieces when they find out (and it will be when, not if)

If the OP was so unsatisfied in het relationship why get married? Why say the vows to love, honour and respect the man she is supposed to love?

It makese laugh All the people that come on here to defend a woman. Are they hoping their defense is gonna get them a shag??

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By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

I found out (after we split), that my ex wife did this to me.

I was fucking devastated.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Everyone is entitled to make there own choices and make up there own minds xx"

Unless you are the OP's husband who can't make up his mind to kick her out because he doesn't know she's fucking around behind his back

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