FabSwingers.com forum: Cannot Accommodate = Married?

By *arried-with-Permission OP Woman
3 days ago

Peacehaven

Hey. I get lots of messages from guys who say they're single. Yet when I look on their profile, it says 'cannot accommodate'.

I'm thinking that actually they're not single.

What are your views from personal experience?

Or could they still be living with mum and dad at 41????

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By *arry WindsorMan
3 days ago

Heaton Park Manchester

"Hey. I get lots of messages from guys who say they're single. Yet when I look on their profile, it says 'cannot accommodate'.

I'm thinking that actually they're not single.

What are your views from personal experience?

Or could they still be living with mum and dad at 41????"

Or maybe they don't want strangers stalking them?

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By *ncognitoGirlWoman
3 days ago

Liverpool

"Hey. I get lots of messages from guys who say they're single. Yet when I look on their profile, it says 'cannot accommodate'.

I'm thinking that actually they're not single.

What are your views from personal experience?

Or could they still be living with mum and dad at 41????"

I usually ask why they don’t accommodate. Often the answer is that they’re cheating on a partner. Sometimes they say they live in a shared house or with parents. Occasionally they say they want to build a rapport with someone before they would be happy to let someone into their home.

Whether you trust that they’re telling the truth is another thing entirely.

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By *naswingdressWoman
3 days ago

Manchester (she/her)

All it means to me is "not prepared to share their home".

It can be married. It can be caring duties (children, parents, siblings, other). It can be a sense of privacy. It might be flatmates.

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By *arried-with-Permission OP Woman
3 days ago

Peacehaven

Quite possibly, never thought about that. Maybe a past experience.

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By *enBakewellMan
3 days ago

bakewell

Married here and yes that’s why I can’t accom. Just being totally honest on my profile x

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By *ncognitoGirlWoman
3 days ago

Liverpool

"Married here and yes that’s why I can’t accom. Just being totally honest on my profile x"

Yes but you state that you’re married in your bio.

I think OP is talking about men who claim to be single but the “cannot accommodate” sets off red flags because they might be lying about their relationship status.

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By *oobaaMan
3 days ago

Sth Tyne

Maybe theyve had a bad experience.

I had someone steal 2 wine glasses one time and that put me off inviting anyone round for months

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By *lternative lifestyleCouple
3 days ago

Louth

"Hey. I get lots of messages from guys who say they're single. Yet when I look on their profile, it says 'cannot accommodate'.

I'm thinking that actually they're not single.

What are your views from personal experience?

Or could they still be living with mum and dad at 41????"

Of course they are cheating. If a single guy met a girl in a club he would take her home if she agreed. No different really.

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By *naswingdressWoman
3 days ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Married here and yes that’s why I can’t accom. Just being totally honest on my profile x

Yes but you state that you’re married in your bio.

I think OP is talking about men who claim to be single but the “cannot accommodate” sets off red flags because they might be lying about their relationship status. "

I think it can be a clue. But by itself it doesn't say married. It says you need to pay more attention

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By *otsure1991Man
3 days ago

Blackburn

Had to move back in with parents whilst saving for a new house is my excuse 😒

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By *arry WindsorMan
3 days ago

Heaton Park Manchester

"Married here and yes that’s why I can’t accom. Just being totally honest on my profile x

Yes but you state that you’re married in your bio.

I think OP is talking about men who claim to be single but the “cannot accommodate” sets off red flags because they might be lying about their relationship status. "

And of course all single women on here do accommodate? No didn't think so.

Again maybe they also don't relish the idea of having a stalker.

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By *ike_looking_forMan
3 days ago

Cumbria

Could also be anything from nosy neighbours to thin walls or living in a small town etc. Personally I prefer to have fun when I'm on my travels

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By *WANDTGCouple
3 days ago

Borough of Greenwich

Single with a silhouette profile and above 35 are a few red flags for us.

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By *earditallWoman
3 days ago

Lancaster

I can't accommodate and I'm very single

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By *jr9876Man
3 days ago

Ipswich

"All it means to me is "not prepared to share their home".

It can be married. It can be caring duties (children, parents, siblings, other). It can be a sense of privacy. It might be flatmates. "

It might be their house is an absolute tip and they are embarrassed to have anyone round. It might be that they are still married on paper but separated and haven't managed to move house yet - I know someone who took 2 years to move out it took so long to sell the house. There are plenty of reasons and I think there is no obligation to share on the profile.

There almost needs to be a "can't accommodate at first" setting, and a "won't travel until I get to know you" setting. etc.

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By *triker0079Man
3 days ago

London

"Married here and yes that’s why I can’t accom. Just being totally honest on my profile x"
I'm in the same boat

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By *abulincsCouple
3 days ago

near a bridge

Usual reply we get to asking why they can’t as seems to be lots single dads lol

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By *naswingdressWoman
3 days ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Married here and yes that’s why I can’t accom. Just being totally honest on my profile x

Yes but you state that you’re married in your bio.

I think OP is talking about men who claim to be single but the “cannot accommodate” sets off red flags because they might be lying about their relationship status.

And of course all single women on here do accommodate? No didn't think so.

Again maybe they also don't relish the idea of having a stalker."

I don't think anyone is saying anything positive or negative about women in this thread.

Not all questions about men imply anything about women. Sometimes they're just questions about men.

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By *ncognitoGirlWoman
3 days ago

Liverpool

"Married here and yes that’s why I can’t accom. Just being totally honest on my profile x

Yes but you state that you’re married in your bio.

I think OP is talking about men who claim to be single but the “cannot accommodate” sets off red flags because they might be lying about their relationship status.

And of course all single women on here do accommodate? No didn't think so.

Again maybe they also don't relish the idea of having a stalker."

My guy, what is your deal? Your profile says you do accommodate. Why are you sounding off?

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By *ovechix69Man
3 days ago

north Northumberland

I would not accommodate until I got to know someone socially by meet or chatting. Have a public job so not the best inviting strangers to my house

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By *ery kinky gentMan
3 days ago

essex

Like me I can't afford a place on my own I have to rent out a room to keep the bills covered and I don't want my flat mate to know about this part of my life nothing sinister

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By *naswingdressWoman
3 days ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Married here and yes that’s why I can’t accom. Just being totally honest on my profile x

Yes but you state that you’re married in your bio.

I think OP is talking about men who claim to be single but the “cannot accommodate” sets off red flags because they might be lying about their relationship status.

And of course all single women on here do accommodate? No didn't think so.

Again maybe they also don't relish the idea of having a stalker.

My guy, what is your deal? Your profile says you do accommodate. Why are you sounding off?"

"Women do bad things too, so there" is always a good look 😬

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By *.hrisMan
3 days ago

Nearby

I do see a lot of couples that can't accomodate too, perhaps they have children at home or something.

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By *eroLondonMan
3 days ago

Mayfair

"All it means to me is "not prepared to share their home".

It can be married. It can be caring duties (children, parents, siblings, other). It can be a sense of privacy. It might be flatmates. "

•

Precisely this. 🩶

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By *aandLoCouple
3 days ago

Southampton

"I do see a lot of couples that can't accomodate too, perhaps they have children at home or something."

That's part of our reason; child at home. The genuine single guys we've chatted to of our age have often been divorced with part time/full time childcare responsibilities also.

In addition we simply don't want a stranger in our home. Once a trust has been built and we've met a few times, if the opportunity presents then we would invite someone into our home.

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By *pagedMan
3 days ago

Doncaster

Probably 90% are married that's why they carnt accommodate

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By *oleraine-coupleCouple
3 days ago

Coleraine

We don’t concern ourselves with it.

Is the person nice

Does the person suit us

Does the person share our interests

Does the person communicate well

Do we like the look of them

Relationships are their business not ours

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By *igBeardyDanMan
3 days ago

Bilston

Im married and can't accommodate, because of my wife's health issues she let's me out to play but one of are rules is im not allowed to bring anyone home which is why I mainly meet at clubs

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By *arried-with-Permission OP Woman
3 days ago

Peacehaven

There are many reasons which I can appreciate, but when there's no photo, no verification and been a member for sometime does throw up a red flag for me.

I don't accommodate single guys but have a joint profile with hubby where we do accommodate with couples.

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By *naswingdressWoman
3 days ago

Manchester (she/her)

"There are many reasons which I can appreciate, but when there's no photo, no verification and been a member for sometime does throw up a red flag for me.

I don't accommodate single guys but have a joint profile with hubby where we do accommodate with couples. "

I wouldn't bother with no photo, no verification at all. Accommodation irrelevant to my consideration.

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By *lowhands7Man
3 days ago

South Leicestershire (and regular stays in Staffs)

Just to balance this out, there are women who also can't accommodate.. should we draw the same conclusions?

I respect there are people on here who cheat, both men and women, but there are also people on here that have a personal life away from fab and don't want to mix the two.

From a personal point of view, it's simply having a child who lives with me.

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By *oddess_MelissaMan
3 days ago

wilts

[Removed by poster at 16/05/26 13:16:36]

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By *oddess_MelissaMan
3 days ago

wilts

"We don’t concern ourselves with it.

Is the person nice

Does the person suit us

Does the person share our interests

Does the person communicate well

Do we like the look of them

Relationships are their business not ours "

Exactly this

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By *inkyisfunukMan
3 days ago

Birmingham

Sometimes I can, sometimes I can’t, I’m single, but I’m not playing at home when my kids are here

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By *ifelover999Man
3 days ago

Eastbourne

I cant accom simply cos i have kids i dont want strangers coming back and they are here

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By *ixenFoxCouple
3 days ago

Glasgow

We take it as an indication that a single guy is likely attached.

Back when we first started on Fab we met a guy and verified him after... only to be contacted with abusive messages by his partner, who lived local to us.

Once bitten twice shy and all that!

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By *azer682Man
3 days ago

North West

Personally I am a widower, but have a daughter who lives with me and a grandson. Thats why I cant accommodate. As my family don't know I amnin the lifestyle.

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By *artorialMan
3 days ago

weymouth

"Hey. I get lots of messages from guys who say they're single. Yet when I look on their profile, it says 'cannot accommodate'.

I'm thinking that actually they're not single.

What are your views from personal experience?

Or could they still be living with mum and dad at 41????"
well I'm living with my dad (to be accurate he's living with me) so accommodating at home is awkward

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By *iGuyForCouplesMan
3 days ago

It's really weird how when a woman can't accommodate everyone is understanding because she probably has kids or it is for her own safety yet guys are immediately cheating.

I hate hosting. I Have to clean the house, prepare some refreshments,get some drinks, change the bedsheets just to change them again a few hours later. I meet mostly couples and hate it when he wonders off to get a drink as I always think is he snooping around my house? I also met a few nutters and had a few meets that didn't go down well so don't wanna be stuck with weird people in my house or have someone knocking on my doors out of the blue. Meeting in a hotel eliminates a lot of those issues. Rock up, have a drink, have some fun and if things aren't going the way we planned or imagine I walk out.

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By *actile TensionMan
3 days ago

Sussex

"Hey. I get lots of messages from guys who say they're single. Yet when I look on their profile, it says 'cannot accommodate'.

I'm thinking that actually they're not single.

What are your views from personal experience?

Or could they still be living with mum and dad at 41????"

I read things literally but remain vigilant

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By *eroLondonMan
3 days ago

Mayfair

I have no desire whatsoever to accommodate at home, I don't subscribe to the notion of accommodating at home...

...but I've still stated on my profile that I accommodate.

This approach works perfectly fine for me. 🩶

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By *octor ProdMan
3 days ago

Constantly Travelling With Work

I don't accommodate as I have my one of my kids living at home.

I don't expect others to accommodate me either

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