FabSwingers.com forum: is it just us?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Not a moan or a rant but a genuine concern. We are getting really fed up with some of the contact we are getting, especially with new members. We were new here a few months back and have met and chatted to some great people so we know that genuine people are on here. But, over time, we have had the unfortunate pleasure of so many dreamers/fakes or what ever you want to label them. Our block list is enormous, only because of the constant winks and messages from the same people over and over. E used to spend ages replying even to say no thanks, but then in most cases got abuse calling her fat and ugly etc so now just an instant block if not what we are looking for. But my thinking is this, block and forget is not really solving the problem. They just move on to someone else or get a new pprofile to contact you again. So what are other people's thoughts or opinions?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *obletonMan
over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures

if you're mainly having problems with new members, why not set up your mail filters to block newbies and unverified members from contacting you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

dont stress about it and just engage with those that do interest you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You are missing the point.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"dont stress about it and just engage with those that do interest you"

Exactly this

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you can report profiles as being abusive?? Don't hesitate in doing that, hopefully they will be banned from the site, the morons!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Example. Set filters yesterday, just now received a wink, friends request and message all at same time from same person. Hasn't read the profile at all. The filter didn't block him. It seems like the genuine people are wayout numbered.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think you can report profiles as being abusive?? Don't hesitate in doing that, hopefully they will be banned from the site, the morons!

I am going to risk a ban and paste a series of messages received by my wife to illustrate what it is like.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shit just got real !!!

We all get these morons, to quote a beautiful but much used irish phrase

"Fuck them "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As fab states no response is not in itself rude , just ignore,report if abusive and block. You need to have a fairly thick skin on this interweb thingy, don't worry about the people who you aren't interested in just concentrate on those you are

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you can report profiles as being abusive?? Don't hesitate in doing that, hopefully they will be banned from the site, the morons!

I am going to risk a ban and paste a series of messages received by my wife to illustrate what it is like."

I know its annoying, but you really do just have to think 'fuck em'

I had a profile on here with another woman, and we had a couple of blokes turn nasty when we said no, and even though we reported it they were still on the site.

We alweays used to reply to every message , but once you engage with them they seem to think they are entitled to sex, so now we only respond to messages that might interest us.

Although my first thought was to track them down and kick the crap out of them, I now console myself with the fact that they are petty, bitter blokes who have no hope of shagging anyone!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aughtywifeandhimCouple
over a year ago

bedford

We have been on this site four years now,yes there are plenty morons on here that can't read,you just have to keep on blocking them,if we find someone ,or another couple we are interested in,we now arrange to meet them at a club,if we don't click at least we will have other options,if playing solo I will meet people from here,but wife says club only as couples,unless she spots someone that catches her eye.or someone we have really enjoyed playing with

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think you can report profiles as being abusive?? Don't hesitate in doing that, hopefully they will be banned from the site, the morons!

I am going to risk a ban and paste a series of messages received by my wife to illustrate what it is like.

I know its annoying, but you really do just have to think 'fuck em'

I had a profile on here with another woman, and we had a couple of blokes turn nasty when we said no, and even though we reported it they were still on the site.

We alweays used to reply to every message , but once you engage with them they seem to think they are entitled to sex, so now we only respond to messages that might interest us.

Although my first thought was to track them down and kick the crap out of them, I now console myself with the fact that they are petty, bitter blokes who have no hope of shagging anyone!"

Not at that stage yet but when its constantly the same shit everyday it takes the fun away from being on here

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if you're mainly having problems with new members, why not set up your mail filters to block newbies and unverified members from contacting you."

Think you maybe need to set your age filters too, as your profile stands any age can message you even though you are asking for 30 - 45...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i just ignore those that dont interest me! but i do play around with my profile alot....being extremely blunt in the profile seems to have helped me repel a large portion of the unsuitables!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"if you're mainly having problems with new members, why not set up your mail filters to block newbies and unverified members from contacting you.

Think you maybe need to set your age filters too, as your profile stands any age can message you even though you are asking for 30 - 45..."

Thanks for pointing that out but its every age range that can be rude, abusive or just god old fashioned annoying.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Its the fact we have arranged over night baby sitting for the children and then an hour from the arranged time we get blown out that is the worst of it. You report them and they leave the site but come back again with the same pictures. Then message you again ffs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *obletonMan
over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures

Thanks for pointing that out but its every age range that can be rude, abusive or just god old fashioned annoying. "

indeed - but at least that way you only need to deal with the rude, abusive and annoying 30-45 year-olds rather than all ages

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for pointing that out but its every age range that can be rude, abusive or just god old fashioned annoying.

indeed - but at least that way you only need to deal with the rude, abusive and annoying 30-45 year-olds rather than all ages"
its mainly that age group that do it any way

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It sounds to me that you aren't happy here at the moment. And we know what the answer to that is.

You've been advised to set your filters correctly for what your looking for but you're notbhappy with that. Try blocking all single men or couples from contacting you. That way only your friends can get in touch.

Do the looking yourselves and if you wink or message someone you fancy then they can get in touch with you. If they turn out to be idiots then block them.

If you're not using the tools available to you then you can't really moan.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ancanCouple
over a year ago

wembley

this is why there should be a name & shame part on here

what we do is try to get genuine people that others we know have meet

but there are some very nice guys on here that ruin it for the rest

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it is most defo not just you, i get called all the fat names under the sun if i say no.

i have blocked all newbies and couples and anyone out of my age range, not that it was them calling me its just not what im looking for.

good luck

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not a moan or a rant but a genuine concern. We are getting really fed up with some of the contact we are getting, especially with new members. We were new here a few months back and have met and chatted to some great people so we know that genuine people are on here. But, over time, we have had the unfortunate pleasure of so many dreamers/fakes or what ever you want to label them. Our block list is enormous, only because of the constant winks and messages from the same people over and over. E used to spend ages replying even to say no thanks, but then in most cases got abuse calling her fat and ugly etc so now just an instant block if not what we are looking for. But my thinking is this, block and forget is not really solving the problem. They just move on to someone else or get a new pprofile to contact you again. So what are other people's thoughts or opinions?"

Only thing you can do is block everyone from messaging you or sending friend requests etc. Then you can pick and choose who to chat with.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"dont stress about it and just engage with those that do interest you"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/05/13 22:34:21]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It sounds to me that you aren't happy here at the moment. And we know what the answer to that is.

Do the looking yourselves and if you wink or message someone you fancy then they can get in touch with you. If they turn out to be idiots then block them.

If you're not using the tools available to you then you can't really moan."
for your information. Filters are set. Its the rudeness and abusive messages being discussed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"this is why there should be a name & shame part on here

what we do is try to get genuine people that others we know have meet

but there are some very nice guys on here that ruin it for the rest"

I arranged to meet these and they left me standing outside a hotel after confirming an hr before that they were going to be there.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It sounds to me that you aren't happy here at the moment. And we know what the answer to that is.

Do the looking yourselves and if you wink or message someone you fancy then they can get in touch with you. If they turn out to be idiots then block them.

If you're not using the tools available to you then you can't really moan."

I agree.

Actually, the admin have changed and improved a lot since I signed up. Of course this doesn't change people but it does change how you interact with them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It sounds to me that you aren't happy here at the moment. And we know what the answer to that is.

Do the looking yourselves and if you wink or message someone you fancy then they can get in touch with you. If they turn out to be idiots then block them.

If you're not using the tools available to you then you can't really moan."

Also, if only your friends can contact you, then communicate with them to widen your circle with people who have been semi-vetted by being friends of friends.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"It sounds to me that you aren't happy here at the moment. And we know what the answer to that is.

Do the looking yourselves and if you wink or message someone you fancy then they can get in touch with you. If they turn out to be idiots then block them.

If you're not using the tools available to you then you can't really moan. for your information. Filters are set. Its the rudeness and abusive messages being discussed"

As others have suggested.... Filter everyone and make all initial contact yourselves.

There are people everywhere who will get abusive for whatever reason. Either grow a thicker skin and ignore / block / report or leave the site.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" for your information. Filters are set. Its the rudeness and abusive messages being discussed"

Yeah I get that. You will never get rid of those that handle rejection badly, but if your filters are set correctly and YOU are the ones getting in touch with the odd one or two that interest you, then that number is likely to drop dramatically. Unless you make all your filters null and void by messaging 100 guys a day.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Name and shame would never work due to the fact that there is no evidence to back up a claim and would therefore be wide open to abuse.

We outted a fake couple (man ) via a status before and were warned by admin.

This guy blocked us and then put up a status claiming that we were fake, (a friend informed us by message). This was enraging but couldnt do much but report.

The guy was banned but will most likely be back as we had encountered this "couple" under three different usernames prior to this.

As a result we blocked all newbies and all un-verified, still get nasty messages bout our skin has thickened a bit more by now and dont take those nasty , sitting in mammys house masturbating, immature little idiots serious anymore.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You may not be able to name and shame, but we have a small group of trusted people we can share information with privately. If everyone did this at a local level, that should out a few of the wasters and abusive types.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

I tend to avoid the "newbies"...

I know we were all there at one point, but with so many having easy access now it hard to tell if genuine or not about actually meeting....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No it's not just you

There are hundreds of people on here that let things bother them that they maybe shouldn't

and thank heavens there are cos there would be about 3 forum threads a day otherwise

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Example. Set filters yesterday, just now received a wink, friends request and message all at same time from same person. Hasn't read the profile at all. The filter didn't block him. It seems like the genuine people are wayout numbered. "

I just don't get this spray and pray behaviour. What would they do if you actually responded? Probably shit themselves!

I look at loads of profiles and close 95% of them again because of something they have written that would probably rule me out or because I just don't fancy them.

What goes through the pests head? Any sex is better than no sex?

Arrange to meet them in a public place and slap them round the face with a wet fish, that's my advice!

It annoys me too because these people ruin it for single guys who can be respectful.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

"No it's not just you

There are hundreds of people on here that let things bother them that they maybe shouldn't

and thank heavens there are cos there would be about 3 forum threads a day otherwise

priceless !!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It sounds to me that you aren't happy here at the moment. And we know what the answer to that is.

You've been advised to set your filters correctly for what your looking for but you're not happy with that. Try blocking all single men or couples from contacting you. That way only your friends can get in touch.

Do the looking yourselves and if you wink or message someone you fancy then they can get in touch with you. If they turn out to be idiots then block them.

If you're not using the tools available to you then you can't really moan."

I think you're a smart cookie sweetheart

I don't use filters or the block button but I DO my homework and check out everyone I think of meeting or messaging...to use this site successfully you really have to be thick skinned, open, honest and direct,

and last but not least...determined!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hardly get any emails lol, would be happy with 5 emails a week haha.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *erebothbiCouple
over a year ago

howden

No, its not just you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

YES ! genuine fun people are outnumbered on here at the moment !

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *obletonMan
over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures

"YES ! genuine fun people are outnumbered on here at the moment !"

is it any different in the real world?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hello it's free.... Hence the time wasters x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread