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"I'd cum to quick" There would be no point | |||
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"I'd cum to quick There would be no point " She doesn't like seconds | |||
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"I'd cum to quick There would be no point " 2nd round tho i'd last and last ![]() | |||
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"I'd cum to quick There would be no point 2nd round tho i'd last and last ![]() he makes promises he cant keep ![]() | |||
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"She thinks she can flutter her eyelids and get what she wants ![]() He thinks i cant ![]() | |||
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"She thinks she can flutter her eyelids and get what she wants ![]() ![]() I'm trying to educate myself by reading a dictionary. | |||
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"She thinks she can flutter her eyelids and get what she wants ![]() ![]() Hes too commited to the cause | |||
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"She thinks she can flutter her eyelids and get what she wants ![]() ![]() He was reading a dictionary | |||
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"She hasn't started her purely sausage diet yet" My diary is full | |||
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"She hasn't started her purely sausage diet yet My diary is full" Im on a sausage only diet and i fear his isnt pure pork | |||
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"She hasn't started her purely sausage diet yet My diary is full Im on a sausage only diet and i fear his isnt pure pork" We own the same short tartan skirt. Awkward... | |||
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"She hasn't started her purely sausage diet yet My diary is full Im on a sausage only diet and i fear his isnt pure pork We own the same short tartan skirt. Awkward... " Now I don't know who I was shagging | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 18/06/25 23:10:24]" He doesnt know what to say must have messed up his grammar again | |||
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"She hasn't started her purely sausage diet yet My diary is full Im on a sausage only diet and i fear his isnt pure pork We own the same short tartan skirt. Awkward... Now I don't know who I was shagging" Doesnt know if he's coming or going. #tag is 100% made of Lincolnshire yeller belly | |||
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"She hasn't started her purely sausage diet yet My diary is full Im on a sausage only diet and i fear his isnt pure pork We own the same short tartan skirt. Awkward... Now I don't know who I was shagging" Oh no... you wear a tie. | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 18/06/25 23:10:24] He doesnt know what to say must have messed up his grammar again " Yeup, your right I've gone to pot tonight 😵💫 | |||
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"But we are in Lidl by the cold cabinets " Its too cold to take my knickers off | |||
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"But we are in Lidl by the cold cabinets Its too cold to take my knickers off" Your knicker aren't nice (see previous post) and we haven't gone shopping for some nicer ones yet (also see previous post...) | |||
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"But we are in Lidl by the cold cabinets Its too cold to take my knickers off Your knicker aren't nice (see previous post) and we haven't gone shopping for some nicer ones yet (also see previous post...) " She hides then with cats protecting | |||
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"The disabled toilets in lidl are already occupied and it's too cold to take your knickers off ![]() he doesn't take advantage of the middle aisle | |||
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"Ooooh look! A welder for £10!" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 | |||
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"Ooooh look! A welder for £10! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣" Oooh. A woman in a welding mask... Oops, my bad, this is "I'd fuck you, but..." isn't it? | |||
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"A woman who knows how to use a tool isn't a but in my book..." Id use your tool instead | |||
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"A woman who knows how to use a tool isn't a but in my book... Id use your tool instead " You got a license for that thing? | |||
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"Mines that tool no one ever uses! " Considering this is "I'd fuck you but", then... because your tool isn't well used? | |||
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"Mines that tool no one ever uses! Considering this is "I'd fuck you but", then... because your tool isn't well used? " Because you said my knickers are horrible | |||
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"Mines that tool no one ever uses! Considering this is "I'd fuck you but", then... because your tool isn't well used? Because you said my knickers are horrible " Lol, you started it! Ok then... because you'd look better in my knickers than me... | |||
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"Mines that tool no one ever uses! Considering this is "I'd fuck you but", then... because your tool isn't well used? Because you said my knickers are horrible Lol, you started it! Ok then... because you'd look better in my knickers than me... " Haha i know i did 😘 Because we debate too much about knickees | |||
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"Mines that tool no one ever uses! Considering this is "I'd fuck you but", then... because your tool isn't well used? Because you said my knickers are horrible " No I said your knickers are hard to remove ![]() | |||
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"Struggles to take my knickers off" Never has any on | |||
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"You’d try to drown me" But youd die happy | |||
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"You’d try to drown me But youd die happy " Youd rather cuddle me | |||
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"You’d try to drown me But youd die happy Youd rather cuddle me" id rather cuddle you .... first | |||
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"You’d try to drown me But youd die happy Youd rather cuddle me id rather cuddle you .... first" I'd rather buy you a cornetto. Just one | |||
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"I might faint at your beauty" Your tinsel tail would tickle me | |||
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"You’d try to drown me But youd die happy Youd rather cuddle me id rather cuddle you .... firstI'd rather buy you a cornetto. Just one" Id rather a twister | |||
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"I might faint at your beauty Your tinsel tail would tickle me " So would my beard between your thighs | |||
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"I might faint at your beauty Your tinsel tail would tickle me So would my beard between your thighs" Your a big tickler | |||
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"You're a big thickler" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😏😏 | |||
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"I've just finished " ive just started | |||
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"I've just finished ive just started " Watching a film | |||
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"I've just finished ive just started " I’m already tired | |||
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"He's seeing someone else" He like them big but I’m slim and average | |||
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"He's seeing someone else He like them big but I’m slim and average " Not into ☕️🐒 | |||
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"He's seeing someone else He like them big but I’m slim and average Not into ☕️🐒" He’s fucking mental | |||
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"He's seeing someone else He like them big but I’m slim and average Not into ☕️🐒 He’s fucking mental " He thinks I’m mental | |||
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"He's seeing someone else He like them big but I’m slim and average Not into ☕️🐒 He’s fucking mental He thinks I’m mental" He thinks hes not mental, not enough insight for me 👅 | |||
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"I'm currently polishing my helmet " Sounds like you’ve got it covered ![]() | |||
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"My helmet is shiny enough ![]() I prefer hard hats | |||
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"I guess use his helmet as a mirror" Tell him i like it _eeper than.. | |||
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"I guess use his helmet as a mirror Tell him i like it _eeper than.." Am in need of a pint so off to the pub | |||
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"33 deg in my office today, sweaty enough already!" He doesnt want to get any sweatier | |||
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"He's indecisive " I cant decide | |||
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"He's indecisive I cant decide " You don't meet couples | |||
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"He's indecisive I cant decide You don't meet couples " I don't like pineapples | |||
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"He's indecisive I cant decide You don't meet couples I don't like pineapples " I like pineapples | |||
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"He's indecisive I cant decide You don't meet couples I don't like pineapples " I'll take your place. | |||
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"He's indecisive I cant decide You don't meet couples I don't like pineapples I like pineapples " You have bad taste | |||
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"I've overdone it with my strategic wank" He's all wanked out | |||
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"I've overdone it with my strategic wank He's all wanked out" He’s after his spunk | |||
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"I've overdone it with my strategic wank He's all wanked out He’s after his spunk" I'm allergic to spunk | |||
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"I've overdone it with my strategic wank He's all wanked out He’s after his spunk I'm allergic to spunk" Hes allergic to cum | |||
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"He doesn't know where to find you in Stockton 😉" Im too old. Damn and double damb. ![]() ![]() | |||
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"He doesn't know where to find you in Stockton 😉 Im too old. Damn and double damb. ![]() ![]() I would but his head is buried in his copy of a road atlas. | |||
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"He doesn't know where to find you in Stockton 😉 Im too old. Damn and double damb. ![]() ![]() I would but his head is buried in my sock drawer | |||
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"He doesn't know where to find you in Stockton 😉 Im too old. Damn and double damb. ![]() ![]() Got my head stuck in the wrong drawers.. ![]() | |||
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"He doesn't know where to find you in Stockton 😉 Im too old. Damn and double damb. ![]() ![]() ![]() There’s nothing there, I have taken it all | |||
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"He doesn't know where to find you in Stockton 😉 Im too old. Damn and double damb. ![]() ![]() ![]() I have no drawers im naked | |||
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"He doesn't know where to find you in Stockton 😉 Im too old. Damn and double damb. ![]() ![]() ![]() She won't let me dagger😎😎😎😎😎 | |||
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"Im in the bad books. ![]() He's too bad | |||
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"He might get too sweaty and my bed took a hammering last night " His bed needs changing | |||
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"He might get too sweaty and my bed took a hammering last night " Hes already had a hammering last night | |||
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"He might get too sweaty and my bed took a hammering last night Hes already had a hammering last night " she still hasn't forgiven me for breaking the bed last night | |||
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"He might get too sweaty and my bed took a hammering last night Hes already had a hammering last night she still hasn't forgiven me for breaking the bed last night" You sound like a liability 😝 | |||
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"He might get too sweaty and my bed took a hammering last night Hes already had a hammering last night she still hasn't forgiven me for breaking the bed last night You sound like a liability 😝" You have been banned too many times from Forums (joke) 😂 | |||
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"He might get too sweaty and my bed took a hammering last night Hes already had a hammering last night she still hasn't forgiven me for breaking the bed last night You sound like a liability 😝 You have been banned too many times from Forums (joke) 😂" I don’t get your jokes 😝 | |||
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"He might get too sweaty and my bed took a hammering last night Hes already had a hammering last night she still hasn't forgiven me for breaking the bed last night You sound like a liability 😝 You have been banned too many times from Forums (joke) 😂 I don’t get your jokes 😝" My jokes are banned 🤣 | |||
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"You are still on a ban😎😎😎😎😎" Everyones banned | |||
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"You are still on a ban😎😎😎😎😎 Everyones banned" I'm only banned from daggering you😎😎😎😎😎 | |||
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"You are still on a ban😎😎😎😎😎 Everyones banned I'm only banned from daggering you😎😎😎😎😎" you also banned from wanking into people's coffee | |||
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"You are still on a ban😎😎😎😎😎 Everyones banned" That’s why I couldn’t message for that long 🤔 | |||
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"You are still on a ban😎😎😎😎😎 Everyones banned That’s why I couldn’t message for that long 🤔" I'm too busy sweating | |||
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"I'm eating ice cream " I’m pulling s out in the garden | |||
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"I'm eating ice cream I’m pulling s out in the garden " Its too hot! | |||
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"I'm eating ice cream I’m pulling s out in the garden Its too hot!" It would get hotter! | |||
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"I'm eating ice cream I’m pulling s out in the garden Its too hot! It would get hotter!" I’ll bring the ice packs | |||
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"I'm eating ice cream I’m pulling s out in the garden Its too hot!" Her strapon isn’t coming near me ![]() | |||
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"I'm eating ice cream I’m pulling s out in the garden Its too hot! It would get hotter!" I would combust | |||
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"I'm eating ice cream I’m pulling s out in the garden Its too hot! It would get hotter! I would combust " He’s too fast | |||
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"But I repeat quickly" You’re a pain in the arse ![]() | |||
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"But I repeat quickly You’re a pain in the arse ![]() but you don't do anal ![]() | |||
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"But I repeat quickly You’re a pain in the arse ![]() I don't have any lube. ![]() | |||
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"But I repeat quickly You’re a pain in the arse ![]() ![]() He didn't come prepared | |||
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"But I repeat quickly You’re a pain in the arse ![]() ![]() he didn't prepare to cum | |||
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"But I repeat quickly You’re a pain in the arse ![]() ![]() I'm all out of cum | |||
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"He ran out if cum too quickly😎😎😎😎😎" he ran out before I could cum | |||
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"He ran out if cum too quickly😎😎😎😎😎 he ran out before I could cum" I'm too quick for him | |||
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"He ran out if cum too quickly😎😎😎😎😎 he ran out before I could cum I'm too quick for him" Your just to fast 🤷 | |||
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"He ran out if cum too quickly😎😎😎😎😎 he ran out before I could cum I'm too quick for him Your just to fast 🤷" I can’t be bothered 🤣 | |||
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"He ran out if cum too quickly😎😎😎😎😎 he ran out before I could cum I'm too quick for him Your just to fast 🤷 I can’t be bothered 🤣" Im too hot and not as obsessed with cum as the others | |||
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"He ran out if cum too quickly😎😎😎😎😎 he ran out before I could cum I'm too quick for him Your just to fast 🤷 I can’t be bothered 🤣 Im too hot and not as obsessed with cum as the others " She's hot and not in the mood | |||
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"I'm too lazy " You're too lazy | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() We're all too 🔥 | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() You love talking about spunk | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() She thinks I like men | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() She talks a lot | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() Love a lady who has a lot to say | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() I prefer black boxers/briefs | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() You're too far away | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() Doesn't think she'll appreciate my Christmas thong | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() Its so warm id just lay there | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() She’s lazy | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() So is his tongue | |||
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"its too hot ![]() ![]() ![]() Can't be bothered 😅 | |||
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