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"A baguette for us to share "Buttered or? | |||
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"The baguette " Full or half? | |||
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"Oink oink " bread buns and fried mushrooms | |||
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"The baguette Full or half?" What can you handle? | |||
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"Oink oink bread buns and fried mushrooms" Oooh yum | |||
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"Oink oink " I'll bring the special sauce  | |||
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"Eggs" Fried or? | |||
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"Oink oink I'll bring the special sauce "Is it your own special recipe ? | |||
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"The baguette Full or half? What can you handle?" If im extra hungry a foot long | |||
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"A baguette for us to share
Buttered or?"Already buttered up for you madame. Would her ladyship prefer tomato or brown sauce? | |||
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"The sausage " We have our first sausage | |||
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"A baguette for us to share
Buttered or?
Already buttered up for you madame. Would her ladyship prefer tomato or brown sauce? "Tomato all day long | |||
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"The baguette Full or half? What can you handle? If im extra hungry a foot long " Well you might have to cope with 6 inches haha | |||
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"The baguette Full or half? What can you handle? If im extra hungry a foot long Well you might have to cope with 6 inches haha" Might have to have 2 🤣 | |||
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"Oh bugger, I forgot the black pud "No black pud for me thank you | |||
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"Oink oink " a big pork sword to store in your pantry | |||
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"I’ll bring the sauce " You're saucy enough  | |||
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"Eggs Fried or?" Scrambled 😂 | |||
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"I’ll bring the sauce " The sexy sauce | |||
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"Pork or cumberland ?" Im a sucker for pork (all pun intended) | |||
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"Hash browns?" Yes we will have some of them slapped on my 6 incher | |||
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"Frying pan and a tent!" If you bring a camping bed deal! | |||
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"Bloomers - big fuckers. "Bloomers and baps all round | |||
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"I'm bringing the speaker, the play list and the vibes😎😎😎😎😎" Georgia 🍑 hopefully | |||
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"Sounds like a plan, any Mayo on your baps after?" I dont like mayo on my bacon | |||
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"I'm bringing the speaker, the play list and the vibes😎😎😎😎😎 Georgia 🍑 hopefully" "Peaches and cream" 😎😎😎😎😎 | |||
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"Sounds like a plan, any Mayo on your baps after? I dont like mayo on my bacon " Not even on a bit! | |||
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"Pork or cumberland ? Im a sucker for pork (all pun intended)" I will come armed with the finest Lincolnshire bangers👌 | |||
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"Sounds like a plan, any Mayo on your baps after? I dont like mayo on my bacon " There's a good girl 👏 mayo does not belong anywhere near bacon. | |||
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"Sounds like a plan, any Mayo on your baps after? I dont like mayo on my bacon Not even on a bit!" Ill have it on the side in case i fancy it | |||
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"Sounds like a plan, any Mayo on your baps after? I dont like mayo on my bacon " No BLT for you then. | |||
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"Sounds like a plan, any Mayo on your baps after? I dont like mayo on my bacon There's a good girl 👏 mayo does not belong anywhere near bacon. " Pure pork only dont want no processed pork | |||
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"Sounds like a plan, any Mayo on your baps after? I dont like mayo on my bacon There's a good girl 👏 mayo does not belong anywhere near bacon. Pure pork only dont want no processed pork" Bet you know a good sausage when you see one, or do you prefer to taste | |||
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"Sounds like a plan, any Mayo on your baps after? I dont like mayo on my bacon There's a good girl 👏 mayo does not belong anywhere near bacon. Pure pork only dont want no processed pork Bet you know a good sausage when you see one, or do you prefer to taste" I like to do a taste test first noone likes a stale sausage | |||
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"Line up lads. "Do we need a ticket? | |||
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"Line up lads.
Do we need a ticket? "A sausage ticket | |||
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"Oatcakes " Healthy option | |||
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"Tomato and brown sauce. Gotta start the debate " There is no debate its tomato 😘 | |||
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"Has anyone pulled pork?" No but ive soaked it and it was tasty | |||
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"Butter, for the toast." Proper butter not the not real butter ? | |||
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"Ketchup" Yes _aizy | |||
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"Eggs - fried, scrambled and poached " Just fried please, with any luck the yokes will pop and run between the rashers 😋 | |||
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"Eggs - fried, scrambled and poached " Covering all tastes i like it | |||
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"Old school heinz too. I definitely feel they've fucked with the recipe. I'm sure it used to taste as sweet as those lips 🧀 " I agree its changed | |||
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"I'm bringing sexy back... ...though some would say thats questionable" You can bring that sexy back here if youd like to .. so i can rub some oil into it maybe ... | |||
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"I'll bring the Irish Kerrygold Butter, who's bringing the puddin'?" Was hoping your the pudding | |||
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"I'll bring the Irish Kerrygold Butter, who's bringing the puddin'?" I think you brought that too 🔥 | |||
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"Coffee… I’m presuming you might be thirsty. Leave the door on the latch and I’ll bring it up.. 👌🏻" You can deliver my coffee any day 👅 | |||
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"Coffee… I’m presuming you might be thirsty. Leave the door on the latch and I’ll bring it up.. 👌🏻 You can deliver my coffee any day 👅" Need any cream, perhaps an eclair? | |||
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"Coffee… I’m presuming you might be thirsty. Leave the door on the latch and I’ll bring it up.. 👌🏻 You can deliver my coffee any day 👅" Smooth. | |||
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"I'll bring the Irish Kerrygold Butter, who's bringing the puddin'? I think you brought that too 🔥" I forgot pudding is dessert in the UK it's not here in Ireland 😂 But I'm happy to serve myself up as a dessert if needed 😈 | |||
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"Coffee… I’m presuming you might be thirsty. Leave the door on the latch and I’ll bring it up.. 👌🏻 You can deliver my coffee any day 👅 Need any cream, perhaps an eclair?" Why id love some cream thank you kind sir will that be delivered to me directly too? | |||
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"Coffee… I’m presuming you might be thirsty. Leave the door on the latch and I’ll bring it up.. 👌🏻 You can deliver my coffee any day 👅 Need any cream, perhaps an eclair? Why id love some cream thank you kind sir will that be delivered to me directly too?" Fresh direct from the source. Looks like I brought too much!!! | |||
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"Coffee… I’m presuming you might be thirsty. Leave the door on the latch and I’ll bring it up.. 👌🏻 You can deliver my coffee any day 👅 Need any cream, perhaps an eclair? Why id love some cream thank you kind sir will that be delivered to me directly too? Fresh direct from the source. Looks like I brought too much!!!" Theres plenty to go round it seems anyone else for cream? | |||
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"Coffee… I’m presuming you might be thirsty. Leave the door on the latch and I’ll bring it up.. 👌🏻 You can deliver my coffee any day 👅 Need any cream, perhaps an eclair? Why id love some cream thank you kind sir will that be delivered to me directly too? Fresh direct from the source. Looks like I brought too much!!! Theres plenty to go round it seems anyone else for cream?" And don't worry it has been well whipped | |||
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"I well fancy a kebab" Wrong thread .... again | |||
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"Coffee… I’m presuming you might be thirsty. Leave the door on the latch and I’ll bring it up.. 👌🏻 You can deliver my coffee any day 👅 Smooth. "Hahaha I said it to myself in a Bond voice as I typed it… Sean Connery style… “hey mish Thighs. I presume you’re thirsty…” | |||
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"Coffee… I’m presuming you might be thirsty. Leave the door on the latch and I’ll bring it up.. 👌🏻 You can deliver my coffee any day 👅 Smooth.
Hahaha I said it to myself in a Bond voice as I typed it… Sean Connery style… “hey mish Thighs. I presume you’re thirsty…”"Thirsty for some smoothnesssssss 🤣 | |||
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"I well fancy a kebab" A hairy one? | |||
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"I well fancy a kebab A hairy one? "Im out | |||
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"I well fancy a kebab Wrong thread .... again" are pork kebabs not a thing? | |||
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"I well fancy a kebab Wrong thread .... againare pork kebabs not a thing?" You could put pork in a kebab i guess | |||
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"Doesn't get you as wet right? "Not like bacon | |||
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"I well fancy a kebab A hairy one?
Im out "Confirmation is required
My inbox is open. | |||
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"Doesn't get you as wet right?
Not like bacon"Absolutely — here’s the amped-up, extra-cheeky Stockton version of the recipe, with more local flavour than a parmo smothered in garlic sauce. Let’s give the locals a proper chuckle: --- Cheeky Bacon & Thighs Bake – Proper Stockton Style This dish is juicy, saucy, and just a little bit naughty — kind of like that night out in Stockton where you ended up in Ku Bar with a kebab in one hand and dignity long gone. It’s got bacon, thighs, and a good squeeze of Heinz — what more could you want? Ingredients: 4 chunky chicken thighs (like the ones you see wobbling across Stockton High Street on a windy Saturday) 6 rashers of streaky bacon (as streaky as a fake tan disaster after a Bank Holiday binge) 2 tbsp olive oil 1 onion, chopped (tears optional — not like the ones you cried after losing your chips on the Infinity Bridge) 2 garlic cloves, minced 3 heaped tbsp Heinz tomato ketchup (none of that off-brand nonsense — this is Stockton, not the Twilight Zone) 1 tsp smoked paprika (or whatever you’ve got knocking about the cupboard) Salt & pepper to taste Optional: chopped parsley for when you're feeling a bit “MasterChef after two WKDs” Method: 1. Preheat oven to 200°C. If you're using an old oven from a Stockton student house, give it a good slap to wake it up. 2. Heat oil in a pan, brown the chicken thighs like they’ve just come back from two hours in the tanning booth at Hollywood Nails. 3. Remove the thighs and fry the onion and garlic until soft — not unlike the punters spilling out of The Globe after a tribute act. 4. Stir in the Heinz ketchup and paprika. Smells class already, doesn’t it? 5. Wrap each thigh in bacon like you’re dressing it for a night in Flares — tight, shiny, and ready for action. 6. Pop into a baking dish, slather in that saucy mix, and roast for 30 minutes until the bacon’s got that proper crisp edge, like your mam’s roasties on Christmas Day. Serving suggestion: Whack it on a plate with chips, rice, or even a side of garlic bread from that one takeaway near the bus station that claims it’s open “until late” (but never is when you need it). Stockton Special Notes: Want it spicier? Add a dash of chilli sauce — or just stir in the drama from the Stockton Facebook group. This dish goes great with a can of Lilt and a gossip about who got kicked out of The George last weekend. --- If you’ve got a parmo on the brain or want a veggie version “for the soft lads,” let me know — Stockton’s got a recipe for everyone. | |||
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"Doesn't get you as wet right?
Not like bacon
Absolutely — here’s the amped-up, extra-cheeky Stockton version of the recipe, with more local flavour than a parmo smothered in garlic sauce. Let’s give the locals a proper chuckle:
---
Cheeky Bacon & Thighs Bake – Proper Stockton Style
This dish is juicy, saucy, and just a little bit naughty — kind of like that night out in Stockton where you ended up in Ku Bar with a kebab in one hand and dignity long gone. It’s got bacon, thighs, and a good squeeze of Heinz — what more could you want?
Ingredients:
4 chunky chicken thighs (like the ones you see wobbling across Stockton High Street on a windy Saturday)
6 rashers of streaky bacon (as streaky as a fake tan disaster after a Bank Holiday binge)
2 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, chopped (tears optional — not like the ones you cried after losing your chips on the Infinity Bridge)
2 garlic cloves, minced
3 heaped tbsp Heinz tomato ketchup (none of that off-brand nonsense — this is Stockton, not the Twilight Zone)
1 tsp smoked paprika (or whatever you’ve got knocking about the cupboard)
Salt & pepper to taste
Optional: chopped parsley for when you're feeling a bit “MasterChef after two WKDs”
Method:
1. Preheat oven to 200°C. If you're using an old oven from a Stockton student house, give it a good slap to wake it up.
2. Heat oil in a pan, brown the chicken thighs like they’ve just come back from two hours in the tanning booth at Hollywood Nails.
3. Remove the thighs and fry the onion and garlic until soft — not unlike the punters spilling out of The Globe after a tribute act.
4. Stir in the Heinz ketchup and paprika. Smells class already, doesn’t it?
5. Wrap each thigh in bacon like you’re dressing it for a night in Flares — tight, shiny, and ready for action.
6. Pop into a baking dish, slather in that saucy mix, and roast for 30 minutes until the bacon’s got that proper crisp edge, like your mam’s roasties on Christmas Day.
Serving suggestion:
Whack it on a plate with chips, rice, or even a side of garlic bread from that one takeaway near the bus station that claims it’s open “until late” (but never is when you need it).
Stockton Special Notes:
Want it spicier? Add a dash of chilli sauce — or just stir in the drama from the Stockton Facebook group.
This dish goes great with a can of Lilt and a gossip about who got kicked out of The George last weekend.
---
If you’ve got a parmo on the brain or want a veggie version “for the soft lads,” let me know — Stockton’s got a recipe for everyone.
"🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 That is amazing 👏👏👏 hahahahahaahah | |||
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"How does some Gentleman’s Relish sound? "You bring that relish kind sir | |||
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" That is amazing 👏👏👏 hahahahahaahah" you need to make it | |||
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"Unfertilised eggs with spring onions and hot sauce" Hot sauce. We're hot enough.  | |||
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" That is amazing 👏👏👏 hahahahahaahah you need to make it" Likes em big for the win 🫡 Dam you... 😢 | |||
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" That is amazing 👏👏👏 hahahahahaahah you need to make it Likes em big for the win 🫡 Dam you... 😢" He put us all to shame there im crying in the corner with my bacon now | |||
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" That is amazing 👏👏👏 hahahahahaahah you need to make it Likes em big for the win 🫡 Dam you... 😢 He put us all to shame there im crying in the corner with my bacon now" At least you got some bacon  | |||
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" That is amazing 👏👏👏 hahahahahaahah you need to make it Likes em big for the win 🫡 Dam you... 😢 He put us all to shame there im crying in the corner with my bacon now At least you got some bacon "But youve got my baguette 😭 | |||
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"Not the French stick.. "What you replacing it with? | |||
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"Not the French stick.. "Sacre bleu | |||
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"Not the French stick..
Sacre bleu "Sorry i dont speak chinese | |||
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"Not the French stick..
Sacre bleu
Sorry i dont speak chinese"Pretty sure that was Dutch | |||
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"Not the French stick..
Sacre bleu
Sorry i dont speak chinese"I'll have a No.69 please. | |||
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"Not the French stick..
Sacre bleu
Sorry i dont speak chinese
Pretty sure that was Dutch "Ah damn i knew id get it wrong | |||
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"Best not be prebaked" You always bring it prepared for me dont you | |||
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"I sometimes rise to the the occasion " Thickthighs is an excellent Baker. You'll be in good hands | |||
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"Pat a cake pat a cake " I love it when you talk dirty.  | |||
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"Whilst Thighs sleeps. Any idea how she likes her breakfast after a night of meat pounding? I was thinking breakfast in bed followed by a delicious creampie (or pork pie, depends how kinky she's feeling)" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 | |||
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"Whilst Thighs sleeps. Any idea how she likes her breakfast after a night of meat pounding? I was thinking breakfast in bed followed by a delicious creampie (or pork pie, depends how kinky she's feeling) 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣" christ do you ever sleep or is that sex doll you made out of bacon starting to turn | |||
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"Whilst Thighs sleeps. Any idea how she likes her breakfast after a night of meat pounding? I was thinking breakfast in bed followed by a delicious creampie (or pork pie, depends how kinky she's feeling) 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣christ do you ever sleep or is that sex doll you made out of bacon starting to turn " The smell of decay woke me up ... | |||
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"I'd like you to be the pig in my blanket" Id like to be the body in your basement | |||
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"I'd like you to be the pig in my blanket Id like to be the body in your basement " oooo there's an idea. We can take turns | |||
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"Butter, for the toast. Proper butter not the not real butter ?" Salted and from a local farm, I've even been splashing out on Curdle hill's produce. | |||
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"Butter, for the toast. Proper butter not the not real butter ? Salted and from a local farm, I've even been splashing out on Curdle hill's produce." Your in the breakfast club!! | |||
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"Butter, for the toast. Proper butter not the not real butter ? Salted and from a local farm, I've even been splashing out on Curdle hill's produce. Your in the breakfast club!! " Whipped cream | |||
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"Butter, for the toast. Proper butter not the not real butter ? Salted and from a local farm, I've even been splashing out on Curdle hill's produce. Your in the breakfast club!! " Bring it on. Shall I bring some cheese and chilli sour dough bread too? Assuming of course Miss Devil hasn't got it under lock and key. | |||
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"We have a 1978 ford door handle. Will this be of any use? " 1 man 9 inches 7 hours of being 8 ate Yess please | |||
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"We have a 1978 ford door handle. Will this be of any use? " We could butter the bread with it ? | |||
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"Who’s bringing the baps? " Plenty of baps being brought dont you worry | |||
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"Who’s bringing the baps? Plenty of baps being brought dont you worry " You? | |||
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"Who’s bringing the baps? Plenty of baps being brought dont you worry You?" Me and a few others are bringing baps you still bringing the french stick? | |||
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"Who’s bringing the baps? Plenty of baps being brought dont you worry You? Me and a few others are bringing baps you still bringing the french stick?" Definitely I’m | |||
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"Who’s bringing the baps? Plenty of baps being brought dont you worry You? Me and a few others are bringing baps you still bringing the french stick?" Excellent! I’ll bring the French stick | |||
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"Who’s bringing the baps? Plenty of baps being brought dont you worry You? Me and a few others are bringing baps you still bringing the french stick? Excellent! I’ll bring the French stick "Weve got a lot of the ingredients now | |||
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"Who’s bringing the baps? Plenty of baps being brought dont you worry You? Me and a few others are bringing baps you still bringing the french stick? Excellent! I’ll bring the French stick
Weve got a lot of the ingredients now "Seems like we have completed the Menu for a picnic | |||
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"Breakfast muffins???" Yesssssssssss | |||
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"Breakfast muffins??? Yesssssssssss" Was that your Meg Ryan impression? | |||
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"Breakfast muffins??? Yesssssssssss Was that your Meg Ryan impression? "It must of been good because you got it 👅 | |||
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"Breakfast muffins??? Yesssssssssss Was that your Meg Ryan impression?
It must of been good because you got it 👅"Well. At least I know to make you orgasm, even if it's a fake obe. | |||
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"Are we bringing wine for this breakfast in case it spills over to dinner, got a lot of food" Whos bringing dessert? | |||
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"Are we bringing wine for this breakfast in case it spills over to dinner, got a lot of food Whos bringing dessert?" You are the dessert. | |||
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"Are we bringing wine for this breakfast in case it spills over to dinner, got a lot of food Whos bringing dessert? You are the dessert. "The perfect glazed donuts | |||
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"Noones getting my pudding im keeping it you bullies 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣" I'll have your arse instead. | |||
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"Noones getting my pudding im keeping it you bullies 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'll have your arse instead. "Did you get it😎😎😎😎😎 | |||
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"Noones getting my pudding im keeping it you bullies 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'll have your arse instead.
Did you get it😎😎😎😎😎"That’s a no go territory. Won’t let you gents go there | |||
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"Noones getting my pudding im keeping it you bullies 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'll have your arse instead.
Did you get it😎😎😎😎😎
That’s a no go territory. Won’t let you gents go there "😎😎😎😎😎 Can I see you S.I.A licence please | |||
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"Noones getting my pudding im keeping it you bullies 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'll have your arse instead.
Did you get it😎😎😎😎😎
That’s a no go territory. Won’t let you gents go there
😎😎😎😎😎
Can I see you S.I.A licence please"Nooooooooooooooo haha | |||
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"Noones getting my pudding im keeping it you bullies 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'll have your arse instead.
Did you get it😎😎😎😎😎
That’s a no go territory. Won’t let you gents go there
😎😎😎😎😎
Can I see you S.I.A licence please
Nooooooooooooooo haha "😎😎😎😎😎 | |||
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"Noones getting my pudding im keeping it you bullies 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'll have your arse instead.
Did you get it😎😎😎😎😎
That’s a no go territory. Won’t let you gents go there
😎😎😎😎😎
Can I see you S.I.A licence please"I actually have one 😂 | |||
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"Noones getting my pudding im keeping it you bullies 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'll have your arse instead.
Did you get it😎😎😎😎😎
That’s a no go territory. Won’t let you gents go there
😎😎😎😎😎
Can I see you S.I.A licence please
I actually have one 😂"Why am I not surprised 😎😎😎😎😎 I suppose you do CQP work as well 😎😎😎😎😎 | |||
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"Bumping the bacon yum yum yum " I'd bump your rump. Xx | |||
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