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How hard do you like it?

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By *partharmony OP   Couple
11 weeks ago

Ruislip

I've seen some BDSM videos recently and been fascinated. Some of the people really go through a lot of pain. I assume that because it's porn I'm looking at the extreme end of this.

I'm curious to know from those of you who partake in this sort of thing, how far do you go? Is it mild and controlled or do really go for it and inflict/receive real suffering, or something in between? Could you say a bit about what you do?

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By *vaRoseWoman
11 weeks ago

Ankh-Morpork


"I've seen some BDSM videos recently and been fascinated. Some of the people really go through a lot of pain. I assume that because it's porn I'm looking at the extreme end of this.

I'm curious to know from those of you who partake in this sort of thing, how far do you go? Is it mild and controlled or do really go for it and inflict/receive real suffering, or something in between? Could you say a bit about what you do? "

Let’s be very clear: BDSM does not have to involve pain. In fact, a great deal of it doesn’t. It’s a broad, nuanced world grounded in connection, communication and trust, not just whips and ball busting.

What it must involve is control, consent and risk awareness. Every time. If someone is out of control, that is not BDSM. That is abuse, and it has no place in this community.

As for me, I enjoy giving and receiving little pain, but it is never about suffering. It’s sensory. It’s chemical. A sting here, a throb there, and the body floods with endorphins, oxytocin, adrenaline and dopamine. It heightens everything. It deepens the pleasure. It brings focus and presence and intensity.

It’s not pain or pleasure. It’s pain and pleasure, working together.

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By (user no longer on site)
11 weeks ago


"I've seen some BDSM videos recently and been fascinated. Some of the people really go through a lot of pain. I assume that because it's porn I'm looking at the extreme end of this.

I'm curious to know from those of you who partake in this sort of thing, how far do you go? Is it mild and controlled or do really go for it and inflict/receive real suffering, or something in between? Could you say a bit about what you do?

Let’s be very clear: BDSM does not have to involve pain. In fact, a great deal of it doesn’t. It’s a broad, nuanced world grounded in connection, communication and trust, not just whips and ball busting.

What it must involve is control, consent and risk awareness. Every time. If someone is out of control, that is not BDSM. That is abuse, and it has no place in this community.

As for me, I enjoy giving and receiving little pain, but it is never about suffering. It’s sensory. It’s chemical. A sting here, a throb there, and the body floods with endorphins, oxytocin, adrenaline and dopamine. It heightens everything. It deepens the pleasure. It brings focus and presence and intensity.

It’s not pain or pleasure. It’s pain and pleasure, working together.

"

This 👏👏👏👏

It's the fine dance between pleasure and pain, each heightening the sensitivity to each other.

BDSM is so much more cerebral than just beating on someone, even if that's the image given from porn sites.

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By *cunthorpe123Couple
11 weeks ago

scunthorpe


"I've seen some BDSM videos recently and been fascinated. Some of the people really go through a lot of pain. I assume that because it's porn I'm looking at the extreme end of this.

I'm curious to know from those of you who partake in this sort of thing, how far do you go? Is it mild and controlled or do really go for it and inflict/receive real suffering, or something in between? Could you say a bit about what you do?

Let’s be very clear: BDSM does not have to involve pain. In fact, a great deal of it doesn’t. It’s a broad, nuanced world grounded in connection, communication and trust, not just whips and ball busting.

What it must involve is control, consent and risk awareness. Every time. If someone is out of control, that is not BDSM. That is abuse, and it has no place in this community.

As for me, I enjoy giving and receiving little pain, but it is never about suffering. It’s sensory. It’s chemical. A sting here, a throb there, and the body floods with endorphins, oxytocin, adrenaline and dopamine. It heightens everything. It deepens the pleasure. It brings focus and presence and intensity.

It’s not pain or pleasure. It’s pain and pleasure, working together.

"

Absolutely this!!

I like a bit of pain but pain isn’t what I get out of it, it’s being helpless, trusting who I’m with, not knowing what’s coming next or where

Donna

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By *uckslut and MCouple
10 weeks ago

Derby


"I've seen some BDSM videos recently and been fascinated. Some of the people really go through a lot of pain. I assume that because it's porn I'm looking at the extreme end of this.

I'm curious to know from those of you who partake in this sort of thing, how far do you go? Is it mild and controlled or do really go for it and inflict/receive real suffering, or something in between? Could you say a bit about what you do? "

Yes, your probably looking at the hyped up for the money shot for porn purpose. I'm glad your looking to educate your self. As most jump straight to the pain part. And questioned the inflicting pain part. There is such a thing as abuse in the community. This is in no way tolarated or accepted. If it's seen at an organised event. It's stopped imdedaitly, no question. Like no means no in a swinger setting. Harder to police behind closed doors.

Kink, is all about consent. Conversations should be had between both parties, before during and after. And updated as nessasary.

Not to be confussed with swinger, slip and tickle. Although, consent should also be sort, before you slap someone across their arse.

No two kniksters are the same. If one could take a paddle to the arse, another might not be able too. Along with one person being able to take and tolarate quite exstream in one setting. But in the next, quite light. Depending on how deep in 'sub space' they are. Kink is like an elastic band. It can stretch in all directions.

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By *lirtyAndFunCouple
10 weeks ago

Rushden

I like it Hard enough to leave a hand print on me but not bruise, same with choking & whips xx

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