FabSwingers.com forum: Non-monogamous dating and swinging

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Are you single in the scene but would love to find a partner in the lifestyle? To have an ENM relationship and swing, whether that's with them or solo, stag vixen, hotwife, hothusband, cuckold, open relationship etc in whatever dynamic appeals to you.

Do you find it difficult to meet someone in the lifestyle already?

Do you find if difficult to bring up this lifestyle when you meet someone on a 'vanilla' dating app?

Would you be interested in a non-monogamous dating event/social?

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By *eve500Man
over a year ago

Leeds

Yes, would love to meet someone 'open' to the idea. Was married to a jealous'prude' for a long time, so I 1. Won't make that mistake again, and 2. Intend to make up for wasted years. Trouble is, everything seems fine and open to begin with, then their feelings get in the way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would 100% be interested in this!! As someone in the lifestyle, finding a relationship is so difficult. As soon as it’s mentioned on the traditional dating sites people are either put off by it, or think you’re only after one thing. I’d love to find a meaningful relationship with someone I could still be involved in the lifestyle with, ideally with a hotwife or stag/vixen dynamic 🫶🏻

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By *ob the builderMan
over a year ago

Colchester

This sounds very interesting I have met couples who thrive on there open relationship and I have seen others where one partner get more attention than the other which can lead to the break down of the relationship

Definitely think an event with the open relationship dating dynamic would do really well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im looking if anyone is interested in a submissive man, i would enjoy a Hotwife/cuckold style relationship

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By *ypersoonMan
over a year ago

WHITCHURCH, Shropshire

Given I've been single the last 1.5 years, it would be a fun experiment to try with regards to both lifestyle & relationships

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By *harcol2Man
over a year ago

pompey

I am interested

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By *ynamicnatureMan
over a year ago

Doncaster

Where do I sign up,😃

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

I am not currently seeking. But when I was actually single and looking it was fucking hard work pulling out the people who are actually ethically non monogamous from the sea of actually just arseholes who like to fuck around. And that's before factoring in compatibility and attraction 💜

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By *bitofaslutWoman
over a year ago

Cannock

[Removed by poster at 04/03/25 19:08:59]

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By *bitofaslutWoman
over a year ago

Cannock

If I get into a relationship, and I'm not looking but things happen, chances are we either met here or at a swingers club, so non monogamy would presumably be our default and playing on the scene would be regular and pretty much unremarkable.

If it's not, we won't be dating.

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By *oughmanMan
over a year ago

Sunderland

I wouldn't mind that. Couldn't see it ever happening but stranger things have happened.

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By *arkDesiresDudeMan
over a year ago

Barnet

I think someone should start a thread. I'm sure people are

Looking.

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By *il-widgeMan
over a year ago

Stone Staffordshire

After the end of a long relationship I'm not ready to settle down, but I do get a real buzz from some seeing some of the people I've met and reading about their subsequent meets and reading their verifications and talking about if, find it really sexy and horny and also happy for them as it usually brings back fond memories of our time together, so who knows maybe in time something will naturally happen with someone who we end up seeing more regularly and explore things together and separately.....in the meantime just loving meeting some amazing people and having great sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m always down for dates with poly/ ENM people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the problem for this is there are very few women in swinging compared to the zillions of men so its going to be a 100 times harder than finding a normal relationship so it will leave men even more frustrated than they already are with swinging ... mind you most of those men are already in relationships of the vanilla type wishing they were swingers..

fact is most women simply want a normal vanilla relationship not hard to see when you see how few couples and women who really do swing ... again meaning alot of couples and women on here are infacr single men

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

Looking back at my dating days personally I'm a fan of being upfront from the start about an intrest in non-monogamous practices in a relationship as well as kinks. However in the normal dating world this can be so problematic.

Form the male perspective: to state openly on a profile often gives the impression you're just a fuck boy and genuinely not into finding a serious committed relationship.

From the female perspective: to state openly on a profile gives off signals you're an easy shag and attracts fuck boys like moths to the flame.

So it's hard for either side to be open from the start about this desire for a relationship from the start because society is crap at dealing with this in an adult way. People can be so immature about it. Yet sexual desires and wants in my opinion are also pretty dam important to express to each other early on to see if you're in the same ball park before you invest too much. And just because you have a conversation about it doesn't mean you have to fuck until you've sussed each other out more. In terms of dating it just allows you to both know that down the line when it comes to finally having sex you have some compatability. I just think adults should be able to have unabashed open conversations about sex and desire. Like you would other aspects when finding out if you're a good match for a date. I would also say if they can have a grown up conversation about sex and desire without getting all creepy and eager that's a green flag.

And a lot of people just aren't swingers or intrested (although from being open on the vanilla dating scene you'd be suprised how many women are at least curious when they're comfortable talking to you openly). So yes I think more tools to help bring us together in healthy swinging relationships is a great thing. We've known some great relationships start on the scene. We ourselves are a Fab success story.

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By *ralTradesmanMan
over a year ago

Oxford

This sounds like the relationship I should’ve had tbh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are you single in the scene but would love to find a partner in the lifestyle? To have an ENM relationship and swing, whether that's with them or solo, stag vixen, hotwife, hothusband, cuckold, open relationship etc in whatever dynamic appeals to you.

Do you find it difficult to meet someone in the lifestyle already?

Do you find if difficult to bring up this lifestyle when you meet someone on a 'vanilla' dating app?

Would you be interested in a non-monogamous dating event/social?

Xx"

Yes definitely

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you all for the response and messages. Really insightful and interesting xx

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By *ryda18Man
over a year ago

Halifax

"I would 100% be interested in this!! As someone in the lifestyle, finding a relationship is so difficult. As soon as it’s mentioned on the traditional dating sites people are either put off by it, or think you’re only after one thing. I’d love to find a meaningful relationship with someone I could still be involved in the lifestyle with, ideally with a hotwife or stag/vixen dynamic 🫶🏻"

Couldn't agree more

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By *estructionDollyWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

Yes to all of this. I am dating outside of swinging and struggling with matching with people who are a lot more "vanilla" or who tell me they are intimidated by the swinging when I explain to them.

Finding a partner who lives local to me and who is in the scene would be ideal but seems to be illusive 😅

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By *estructionDollyWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

Exactly this!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would certainly love that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

100% would love to meet someone to date that was into this lifestyle so yea

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By *zlakMan
over a year ago

Norwich

[Removed by poster at 05/03/25 00:49:27]

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By *zlakMan
over a year ago

Norwich

By AzlakFind posts by Azlak Man

just this minute!

Norwich

I would 100% be interested in this. I have not been looking but would certainly be open to a relationship. I'm bi and this does not appeal to all so norrows it down even more.

Have on the vanilla side and tried to be honest and got told "why can't you be happy with one patner"!!

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By *otgirl32Woman
over a year ago

Ashton Under Lyne

Do you find it difficult to meet someone in the lifestyle already?

Do you find if difficult to bring up this lifestyle when you meet someone on a 'vanilla' dating app?

Would you be interested in a non-monogamous dating event/social?

Xx"

Actively looking. Not going to find a partner in the lifestyle on a vanilla dating site

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By *infullyObedientWoman
over a year ago

Woodley

As my profile says, this is what I'm looking for. Won't find it on vanilla dating sites. Having lots of fun while I'm looking but do miss the actual social side of dating and would love to find someone in the scene who wants to wine and dine as well as share me 😉

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By *xfordjohnMan
over a year ago

Oxford

I've had two long-term non-monogamous relationships (now widowed) and, yes, it is difficult to find someone new, especially at my age. I can find couples (I love threesomes) and single guys but compatible women are just so rare and it's not a subject easily raised in normal conversation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d be really interested to find someone I could be in an ENM relationship with and stay on the scene. I’d love to find a hotwife type scenario. X

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
over a year ago

Manchester(ish).

I'd love to find someone to share swinging and fab type adventures.

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By *etmebeinurefantasiesMan
over a year ago

witney

Do you find it difficult to meet someone in the lifestyle already?

Do you find if difficult to bring up this lifestyle when you meet someone on a 'vanilla' dating app?

Would you be interested in a non-monogamous dating event/social?

Xx"
absolutely brilliant idea. Being a single male makes meeting like minded people near on impossible. And to be able to experience the feeling of liberation of being able to chat openly would be amazing 😉

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By *irthy89888Man
over a year ago

Barnsley

100% I want this lifestyle with a partner but people outside the lifestyle think it’s vile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s so difficult. I’m just basically not going to date anyone who wants to be monogamous, and being up front about that is the only honest way. There is one dating app (that I’m not sure I can mention?) that caters for ENM folk and have met a few women on there. The problem is that the field is smaller and then factor in compatibility makes it super tricky!

The poly crew are not really my crowd either!

No easy answers. Plan to be single and have lots of fun for now

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By *ycraMan
over a year ago

Huddersfield

If the right person were to come along...

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By *luttTV/TS
over a year ago

Duns

Do you find it difficult to meet someone in the lifestyle already?

Do you find if difficult to bring up this lifestyle when you meet someone on a 'vanilla' dating app?

Would you be interested in a non-monogamous dating event/social?

Xx"

Yes to all of that!

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By *ong-leggedblondWoman
over a year ago

Next Door

Do you find it difficult to meet someone in the lifestyle already?

Do you find if difficult to bring up this lifestyle when you meet someone on a 'vanilla' dating app?

Would you be interested in a non-monogamous dating event/social?

Xx"

Definitely interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only date a woman that’s happy in the same life style as me because then if they’re not into it, there’s no way you’d get on and you wouldn’t be the real you

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By *arkDesiresDudeMan
over a year ago

Barnet

I think a London social would be a good idea.

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By *abster8008Man
over a year ago

Bristol

Absolutely this 💯.

Social/events for meeting in this form would really work and should be popular.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Absolutely this 💯.

Social/events for meeting in this form would really work and should be popular. "

Watch this space 😉

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By *JCRoseWoman
over a year ago

Caversham

I would be interested but more local, this Lifestyle is so hard to get a relationship in plus not seen any socials near me either which is a shame

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By *exysoul888TV/TS
over a year ago

Newcastle

I'd be very interested in the idea of a social, and if I were to date again it would most likely be open in some way

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By *allandbald80Man
over a year ago

Probably near you

After “vanilla” dating and being unfulfilled by that and having a brief experience of a non-monogamous “situationship” where things weren’t really as honest and respectful as I believe they should be, I’ve decided that looking for a partner/partners in the non-monogamous setting would be more suiting for me.

So I’d be interested in joining a social group and meet ups. 😋

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I'd love to find someone who is into swinging to enjoy the journey/experience together...unfortunately I'm more likely to find the needle in the haystack first x

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By *iFruityCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Ilfracombe

Can couples or half a couple hang out in this group?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can couples or half a couple hang out in this group?"

If in an open relationship looking for another partner to date in the scene then yeah 😊

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By *icturisqueMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

This sounds like a great thread to have.

From my experience most women I spoken to are looking for a primary partner. They generally lose interest fairly quickly if you're already in a ENM relationship.

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By *arkDesiresDudeMan
over a year ago

Barnet

"I'd love to find someone who is into swinging to enjoy the journey/experience together...unfortunately I'm more likely to find the needle in the haystack first x"

Or them being on the other end of the country!

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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Trouble is, everything seems fine and open to begin with, then their feelings get in the way."

ENM relationships and feelings aren't mutually incompatible. It's a relationship, not a FB/FWB situation.

Both my current partners I met on Fab. My previous long term partner I met on Fab.

An ENM themed social or event would be lovely. My only concern would be that as with any vanilla site, here or a normal speed dating event, you'll get a lot of people attending that aren't really looking for an ENM relationship, just another potential avenue to hook up. But you run that risk whatever avenue you choose of course.

There's no better way to find an ENM relationship than to not look for it in my experience. It's something that progresses naturally over time and can't be forced. Find a FWB not averse to the idea and take it from there, and treat it as you would any normal relationship. 🤷‍♂️

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By *akeyjakeJMan
over a year ago

Oxfordshire

Yes.

Personally I find for those of us that understand this lifestyle, that see it for its strengths and how it can empower yourself and a relationship.

I think meeting people in a social setting that would allow for a more “air to date” setting then a sexual one, would be a of great benefit for all parties to put themselves across to a number of persons in a fun and social way, with still keeping allowing a tone of “more then sex”.

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By *r Mind CandyMan
over a year ago

Cheshire

God no! I can only disappoint one woman at a time!

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By *ynamicnatureMan
over a year ago

Doncaster

I think I may have met my match,😁

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

London

Needle in a haystack, I’d say.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is one “Feeld” 🤷‍♂️

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are 100000% interested in such a social get together !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is a great idea. Would be great to attend a group night out with like minded singles wanting a relationship with a difference. Xx

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By *abster8008Man
over a year ago

Bristol

"Absolutely this 💯.

Social/events for meeting in this form would really work and should be popular.

Watch this space 😉"

Would love to get involved in this, please do keep us posted

And if you need anything let me know x

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By *exysoul888TV/TS
over a year ago

Newcastle

Whereabouts would people want any potential social to take place?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

After finding out I like some kinks I guess it's the thought of bringing it up with a new partner whereas on here it's kind of open lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a strong believer that unless you like clubs and bars... Don't go looking for a partner in clubs and bars! I found my partner while doing the things I love.

The same is true for swinging. If it's a big part of who you are then it's better to try and date in the scene than date outside and "convinced" them to try it. That's not to say you can't introduce people to the scene, I have, but if you want to tick that box up front then date a swinger.

There's a lot of guys I've met on here and on Fabguys who go "my wife wouldn't understand". I can't imagine hiding such a fundamental thing from a life partner. My wife knew I was bi from the start and we started in a poly relationship! We are mono now for our own reasons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be clear the above is in strong celebration and approval of a ENM/swinging dating event

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

ENM ~ Swing ~ Date event coming soon 😉🙌🏻

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would love to find someone in the scene who can put up with me lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would love to find someone in the scene who can put up with me lol "

I doubt youd struggle to find someone lol

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By *oo boo bearWoman
over a year ago

hull

Single female

Don’t want a relationship at all

Happy single

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree . In exactly same position .. I’m not even on any of platforms …

So I’m here where I’m free . so to speak ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree . In exactly same position .. I’m not even on any of platforms …

So I’m here where I’m free . so to speak ..

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

"Yes.

Personally I find for those of us that understand this lifestyle, that see it for its strengths and how it can empower yourself and a relationship.

If we know the people we are chatting up are swingers in the first place it takes a huge amount of the pressure off. It allows us to just crack on with the normal dating thing and getting to know each other. Because we already know that if things work out down the line the swinging isn't an issue and it's something you're most likely to enjoy together as a couple. Just removes all the awkwardness around bringing up the subject, wasted time invested and rejection because of sexual/relationship preference.

Sadly it is a small scene (most people don't want to swing) so selection is limited. However in our/experience and my own of single dating (where I was always un front about it) more people especially women are intrested than you think. Maybe it's because of the exposure the scene gets in the media these days. As long as they've established your not a creep first you'd be suprised how many are open minded and will at least have an mature adult conversation about it.

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By *ee And MikeCouple
over a year ago

Cannock

We’ve been a cuckold couple for over 30 years and during that time Dee has had some serious bull/hotwife relationships but this have been difficult to manage at times for a number of reasons.

The lifestyle can be difficult at times and takes a lot more out of you than a traditional relationship.

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By *ycraMan
over a year ago

Huddersfield

Deffo actively looking

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By *arkDesiresDudeMan
over a year ago

Barnet

"ENM ~ Swing ~ Date event coming soon 😉🙌🏻 "

I'd be interested in such an event

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By *melie LALWoman
over a year ago

neverland

"Yes, would love to meet someone 'open' to the idea. Was married to a jealous'prude' for a long time, so I 1. Won't make that mistake again, and 2. Intend to make up for wasted years. Trouble is, everything seems fine and open to begin with, then their feelings get in the way."

Feelings wtf?

... might be the relationship part of ENM

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By *melie LALWoman
over a year ago

neverland

I've given up.

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By *onderWomanWlvWoman
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"ENM ~ Swing ~ Date event coming soon 😉🙌🏻 "

I'll be keeping an keen eye out for this 👀

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By *melie LALWoman
over a year ago

neverland

"I am not currently seeking. But when I was actually single and looking it was fucking hard work pulling out the people who are actually ethically non monogamous from the sea of actually just arseholes who like to fuck around. And that's before factoring in compatibility and attraction 💜"

Ditto

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By *ete hMan
over a year ago

Penzance

Would love to find an ENM relationship

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By *heelz69Man
over a year ago

Manchester

I'd love this type of relationship!!!

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By *ethefabtwoCouple
over a year ago

coventry

Without having to put labels on it, I suppose this is where we started from and ended up here!

Longer term arrangement is always the aim

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By *ctionSandwichCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle under Lyme

We feel you'd have to have trust in your partner to be prepared to share them. Different horses for courses though we guess.

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By *irthy89888Man
over a year ago

Barnsley

I want this 100% however most singles on here are here for the purpose of the website only and that’s sex xx

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By *ycraMan
over a year ago

Huddersfield

"Can couples or half a couple hang out in this group?"

Anyone can hang there bits n bobs out here i presume

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By *urora1912Woman
over a year ago

Norfolk East anglia

It's something I've thought more about over the years, and I don't think I could be with one person and monogamous

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By *iGuy_LeedsMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

This would be great to find as trying to find someone to share the lifestyle with in the vanilla world is not the easiest.

Though whilst it would be great to find someone on here that is looking for that too its not what I imagine most people are on here for and not something that can be rushed into.

If it happens it happens I would say.

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By *iFruityCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Ilfracombe

"This would be great to find as trying to find someone to share the lifestyle with in the vanilla world is not the easiest.

Though whilst it would be great to find someone on here that is looking for that too its not what I imagine most people are on here for and not something that can be rushed into.

If it happens it happens I would say."

Well said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah, I’m single and definitely open to finding a partner in the lifestyle. I’m drawn to ENM dynamics like stag/vixen or hotwife, but open to whatever feels right. It’s definitely tough bringing this up on vanilla apps, so a non-monogamous social sounds like a great idea—I’d be interested

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By *otwife Snowy and MeCouple
over a year ago

Carshalton

Mrs wants to date more from fabs but kinda likes more of the dinner/dance with it and see where things go rather than just being a "sure thing" all the time. Wondering if feeld is worth a punt

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By *heelz69Man
over a year ago

Manchester

This is something that I'm wanting to try and explore

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By *thicalSluts2024Couple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"100% would love to meet someone to date that was into this lifestyle so yea"

Hey - need more folk like you in Glasgow

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By *ammy696969Woman
over a year ago

Stockport

It's a great idea

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By *esparate danMan
over a year ago

glasgow

"100% would love to meet someone to date that was into this lifestyle so yea

Hey - need more folk like you in Glasgow

Oh it sounds like you have an interesting set up

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By *ryda18Man
over a year ago

Halifax

Very good set up

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By *oober698Man
over a year ago

Lincoln

This would be a fantastic idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im defo interested

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By *a Petite Madame NoireWoman
over a year ago

London / Essex

I'd be interested

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By *otgirl32Woman
over a year ago

Ashton Under Lyne

Do you find it difficult to meet someone in the lifestyle already?

Do you find if difficult to bring up this lifestyle when you meet someone on a 'vanilla' dating app?

Would you be interested in a non-monogamous dating event/social?

Xx"

Actively looking ..... not easy

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By *obbiKentMan
over a year ago

maidstone

Think these find you, fab gives the chance to align desires. But just like on dating apps, the chat here, and the meets, well that where the relationship may flourish.so not a lot different I guess, just the tip side.

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By *uriosityandcatCouple
50 weeks ago

sheffield

Absolutely for sure.

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