FabSwingers.com forum: Does anyone feel sorry for woman on here sometimes

By *attooedlad199521 OP Man
2 weeks ago

Bournemouth

Being on this site has shown me some men on here are fucking nuts 😂😂😂 hearing more and more horror stories

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By *oxycouple28Couple
2 weeks ago

bexley

Yep. Then it ruins it for the actual good ones. On the rare occasion we meet (we aren't looking now so don't message us) we will look for someone who is polite, well mannered and acknowledges both of us. But there are so many that just send crude messages or make presumptions etc.

And this is for a couple... I can only image single women have it worse!

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By *attooedlad199521 OP Man
2 weeks ago

Bournemouth

"Yep. Then it ruins it for the actual good ones. On the rare occasion we meet (we aren't looking now so don't message us) we will look for someone who is polite, well mannered and acknowledges both of us. But there are so many that just send crude messages or make presumptions etc.

Oh yeah I reckon it’s worse for them some of the abuse I heard they get in mental just lonely men who can’t get any pussy I guess lol

And this is for a couple... I can only image single women have it worse! "

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
2 weeks ago

East Sussex

I do feel sorry for the ones who take every precaution to avoid the numpties but they still slip through. I don't feel sorry for those who don't use filters and complain they get too many poor quality and horrible messages.

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By *_new_memberMan
2 weeks ago

Tewkesbury

I feel sorry for everyone on here. This site can be tough at times.

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By *eyeYCouple
2 weeks ago

Nr Leicester

A couple of our lady friends have shown us their mailbox and the messages are insane, in both numbers and content..

D said he was "embarrassed for, but unfortunately not surprised at his gender!"

We our share but no where near the level seen.

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By *nn0centHxxWoman
2 weeks ago

brompton

Nope!

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By *uckurcumMan
2 weeks ago

Bishop Auckland

Unfortunately there seems to be a trend to some form of assumed primeval sexual entitlement on this and other sites...

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By *haringisCaring1208Couple
2 weeks ago

Lurgan

And this is for a couple... I can only image single women have it worse! "

Exactly this. Sums up our views and what we are looking for too when we do meet. Couldn’t have put it better.

Must be wild for single women

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By *adybonersirlongswordCouple
2 weeks ago

EAST GRINSTEAD

The best ones are the guys who message saying what they'd like to do, then when you say no, they turn abusive and calling you fat and ugly etc. love when the trash makes itself known so we can block

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
2 weeks ago

Men haven’t got the monopoly on being nuts

loads of Women as well

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By *ardandhungMan
2 weeks ago

priorslee

Sometimes yes, but also you have to be mindful that us guys get a hard time too.

I came across a forum thread recently with most of the women saying they are getting annoyed with the amount of profiles they get messages from with just cock pics and to use your imagination.

Some profiles even say they know what one looks like haha.

What confuses me about that is most women profiles on here also, only have boob pic after boob pic and pussy after pussy pic.

Surely a good percentage of men know what boob and pussies look like too right?

Its actually quite embarrassing that some people, including men, put themselves on a pedestal on this site to think they can talk to each other so disrespectfully sometimes.

Its a sex site - that's the whole point - to show off the good we have.

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
2 weeks ago

Essex

To me personally.

It’s just words on a screen. I have a block button, a delete button a report button (apparently- never had cause to use it). There are filters I could use. I don’t use the filters most of the time

A) I talk to a lot of people via the forums

B) I find the real idiots do a lovely job of self filtering.

There are idiots here and face to face - of all genders, sexes, statuses and orientation. I just concentrate on the good.

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By *ardandhungMan
2 weeks ago

priorslee

"To me personally.

A) I talk to a lot of people via the forums

B) I find the real idiots do a lovely job of self filtering.

There are idiots here and face to face - of all genders, sexes, statuses and orientation. I just concentrate on the good."

Exactly correct. The real idiots always filter themselves out. Use the block button

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By *atty CoramWoman
2 weeks ago

Wimbledon

"Sometimes yes, but also you have to be mindful that us guys get a hard time too.

I came across a forum thread recently with most of the women saying they are getting annoyed with the amount of profiles they get messages from with just cock pics and to use your imagination.

Some profiles even say they know what one looks like haha.

What confuses me about that is most women profiles on here also, only have boob pic after boob pic and pussy after pussy pic.

Surely a good percentage of men know what boob and pussies look like too right?

Its actually quite embarrassing that some people, including men, put themselves on a pedestal on this site to think they can talk to each other so disrespectfully sometimes.

Its a sex site - that's the whole point - to show off the good we have.

I think the difference is that boobs are prettier than penises.

I am not sure I understand what you mean by *show off the good we have* but in my opinion if your life's biggest achievement is having a penis- you need better achievements.

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By *ardandhungMan
2 weeks ago

priorslee

I think your missing the point!

Im saying it's hard for both sexes, women on here get such a hard time from guys being complete and utterly idiots, but men get it hard on here as women can also be idiots too.

Its a not a fight about who's better here in regards to sex, it's a fight against us normal people and the ones who do not understand the meaning of respect

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By *ardandhungMan
2 weeks ago

priorslee

And my point is already proven in the statement you have made, boobs are prettier than penises?

That is personal opinion, right?

Have you seen some of the boobs on the site?

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By *atty CoramWoman
2 weeks ago

Wimbledon

"I think your missing the point!

Im saying it's hard for both sexes, women on here get such a hard time from guys being complete and utterly idiots, but men get it hard on here as women can also be idiots too.

Its a not a fight about who's better here in regards to sex, it's a fight against us normal people and the ones who do not understand the meaning of respect

Fair enough.

Are you suggesting though that a man being forced to look at images of boobs after boobs and pussy and after is in the equivalent of women being bombarded by dick pics?

I dont think it is the same.

Men in general appreciate the crude imagery.

Women, in general do not.

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By *atty CoramWoman
2 weeks ago

Wimbledon

"And my point is already proven in the statement you have made, boobs are prettier than penises?

That is personal opinion, right?

Have you seen some of the boobs on the site? "

Yes.

Penises, in general, are not aesthetically pleasing. They are not designed to be.

Boobs? Yes.

Even the ugly ones that you allude to (I have not seen any hideous boobies but I have seen many hideous penises)

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By *r TriomanMan
2 weeks ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

I feel for any victims of bad, threatening, inappropriate behaviour on this site; it's supposed to be fun and safe.

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By *ardandhungMan
2 weeks ago

priorslee

No not at all. What I'm saying is that when women are saying they hate profiles that have no imagination, and only show cock pics, to then have a profile with only boob and pussy pics and also no imagination, isn't this a bit pot kettle?

The fact there's a forum asking of do we feel sorry for women on this site is a really sad, for me is really sad tbf

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
2 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

Nah.

That first influx on joining is horrendous for sure. But after that and a chance to work out filters and blocks, they're choosing to stay here, they can always leave if it's not for them 💜

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By *uminsiderMKMan
2 weeks ago

St Austell

I frequently feel for the ladies - and couples, too - whose 'new' accounts don't even last a day...

....when they disappear within hours, it's fairly likely that they were totally unprepared for the avalanche of messages that will have hit their inbox...

....likewise, those that get created, and are apparently only logged into once afterwards - probabl due to being overwhelmed...

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By *ardandhungMan
2 weeks ago

priorslee

The ones that dissapear after a few hours are usually fake trust me.

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By *atty CoramWoman
2 weeks ago

Wimbledon

"No not at all. What I'm saying is that when women are saying they hate profiles that have no imagination, and only show cock pics, to then have a profile with only boob and pussy pics and also no imagination, isn't this a bit pot kettle?

Boobs are not genitals so the attempt to draw a parallel is incorrect.

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By *ardandhungMan
2 weeks ago

priorslee

Who said they were genitals?

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By *ardandhungMan
2 weeks ago

priorslee

Because the only parallel i see in my last statement is cock/pussy.

But I'm guessing you didn't read that part

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By *atty CoramWoman
2 weeks ago

Wimbledon

What confuses me about that is most women profiles on here also, only have boob pic after boob pic and pussy after pussy pic.

Surely a good percentage of men know what boob and pussies look like too right?

You appear to be conflating boobs and pussies. You yourself admitted confusion. I am simply attempting to clarify by pointing out that boobs are not genitals.

Apologies if I got that wrong - it is quite challenging to understand what you mean.

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By *ardandhungMan
2 weeks ago

priorslee

Its easy to understand what i mean if you read the statement and answered the question I asked.

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By *atty CoramWoman
2 weeks ago

Wimbledon

"Its easy to understand what i mean if you read the statement and answered the question I asked.

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By *uminsiderMKMan
2 weeks ago

St Austell

"The ones that dissapear after a few hours are usually fake trust me.

Some maybe, but certainly not all...

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By *outhstaffscoupleCouple
2 weeks ago

Cannock

I works both ways really, we've had our share of weird messages from single guys, but also met some great ones.

Just need to use filters properly to stop any abuse.

It seems sometimes people would rather get hundreds of messages even though some are not what they're looking for and then update their status "wow,200 messages to read, I'll reply when I can"

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By *ympho6969Woman
2 weeks ago

glasgow

Since I've just been blocked again after setting up a social, I'm back to wondering what's the point.

Just a bunch of guys looking for wank material these days wasting my time.

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By *oredhorny42Man
2 weeks ago

stirling

Only small mercy is that in sending the messages (ive seen some absolute horror shows that ladies have been sent) is that it outs them as a nutter and can be reported and blocked.

Still shouldnt be sent if you ask me though.

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By *ast Lothian couple 888Couple
2 weeks ago

east lothian

Had some great conversations with single guys and we’ve had a few stupid messages from single guys but we’ve also had the same with couples if anything we’ve had more problems with women looking for stuff that’s not on offer (mr)

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By *ucka39Man
2 weeks ago

Newcastle

Nope because that's what the filters are there for so use them wisely it can be a rough ride but can be avoided

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By *am4sinMan
2 weeks ago

Mansfield

It's a shame there's idiots on here, but that's the down side to a free site, it gets idiots. I dont even bother talking to none site supporters even though as a single guy we get almost zero attention.

But there's really no point in getting your hopes up to find out the person messaging you just vanished

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By *tarcrossed_SwingersCouple
2 weeks ago

Loughborough

They are under no illusion as to what will happen. No different to any other website. Women will always be in demand where a 'connection' is involved.

Some of them love being in demand, despite how much they moan. They could easily block everyone and pick out who they are looking for but they choose to leave their filters open! 🤷‍♀️

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By (user no longer on site)
2 weeks ago

Nope.

They should join a site like this with 'eyes wide open', knowing its a sausage fest. If its all to much, like others have said they can:

1. Block profiles

2. Use message filters

3. Take a break and hide their profile

4. Report abuse to admin and the account will get deleted (I know they will make another account but that's beyond the scope of this topic).

5. Not show their faces, a suprising number of single females do this and it shocks me.

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By *oiluvfunMan
2 weeks ago

Penrith

"Being on this site has shown me some men on here are fucking nuts 😂😂😂 hearing more and more horror stories "

Friends have shown me sample messages from guys, and they have been truly shocking tbf! But; delete and block and use the message filters, it's not rocket science!

They're never short of offers either way

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By *oxy jWoman
2 weeks ago

somerset

no i feel sorry for no one you make your own bed ... idiots are not just men idiots are anyone plenty of idiotic women couples tv trans on here too ..

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By *pudup15Man
2 weeks ago

Bedford

Bit like real life really, not surprising a few strange ones lurking around pursuing females on here.

At least they can be blocked on here, out and about not so easy.

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By *pslad99Man
2 weeks ago

colchester

I feel sorry for all the good people on here.

There are some fruit cakes on here and it ruins it for others but that’s like and we carry on.

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By *lossomTreeWoman
2 weeks ago

Ipswich

Well I disagree, I very occasionally accept messages from single men, last time I reported one for calling me a f****** c*** for deleting his message without replying, the account didn't get removed.

It's the only time I've ever reported a PM have to say I was disappointed he wasn't removed.

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By *lossomTreeWoman
2 weeks ago

Ipswich

I also know of a guy who last year targeted abuse at a particular woman across different areas of Fab, he had some privileges removed but again the account remained.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
2 weeks ago

East Sussex

"Well I disagree, I very occasionally accept messages from single men, last time I reported one for calling me a f****** c*** for deleting his message without replying, the account didn't get removed.

It's the only time I've ever reported a PM have to say I was disappointed he wasn't removed. "

He will probably have received a warning. Accounts aren't always removed for a first offence.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
2 weeks ago

East Sussex

Here is an explanation from Admin from another thread on how they deal with reports.

******Just a quick note. If people report others and we can verify that they have broken site rules, we always take action (either a first and final warning, partially suspended account, fully suspended, mixture of the above).

Every single report sent via the REPORT link is reviewed. Clearly it's not in our interests to have people on here who are bad for the site. Equally we need to verify what has been reported and be fair to those who have been reported.

Admin

PS. we never provide feedback on what has happened. It's just not practical given that we get 100s of reports a day.

Here is what the page says after a report has been submitted:

Your feedback has been saved.

A website admin will shortly review your feedback and take the necessary action. After reviewing the evidence available to us, we may disable an account, remove a user, disable certain aspects of that user's account or issue a warning.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you.******

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
2 weeks ago

East Sussex

"I also know of a guy who last year targeted abuse at a particular woman across different areas of Fab, he had some privileges removed but again the account remained."

You won't know what action admin took.

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By *eroLondonMan
2 weeks ago

Mayfair

Nø. I don't feel sorry for women on here. They don't need my sympathy but I'm happy to afford them my empathy. I accept that they are subject to the wrath delivered by some unsavoury folk on here. But, as I said, I don't feel an iota of sympathy because it would come across as disingenuous.

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By *eroLondonMan
2 weeks ago

Mayfair

"... ...it ruins it for others but that’s like and we carry on."

No, it doesn't. The behaviour of one person has little or no bearing on the success of another.

I carve my own path on here, irrespective of the behaviours, transgressions and tantrums from others. My success on here is based upon my actions, good or bad.

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By *oughmanMan
2 weeks ago

Sunderland

[Removed by poster at 23/02/25 17:32:55]

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By *osie xoWoman
2 weeks ago

East Yorkshire

I've had some 'interesting' messages to say the least! My biggest pet peeve though is when I get a message from a guy, go click on his profile and it says something about not being into large/overweight women, when my profile literally states I'm big. People's preferences are their preferences and I take no offence to that, we're all adults... But why are you messaging me 😂 happened a good few times now!

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By *ealitybitesMan
2 weeks ago

Belfast

No I can't say I do feel sorry for women in general on here because there are so many options and tools available to improve the experience.

I don't have any sympathy either for those who refuse to accept that there are 3 sides to every fab story and not everything is as it may seem at first glance.

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By *oxy jWoman
2 weeks ago

somerset

when me n hubs first got into swinging (30++ years ogo) we were told by many swingers who had already been on the scene to have thick skin this was before the internet we were 18 and 19 years old and took under several couples wings.

nastiness has always been a thing evenn without the internet and clubs or i should say very few clubs ... we've seen full blown punch ups at dogging spots its always going to be there right or wrong as so many cannot accept rejection that includes men women couples tv trans bi gay and no matter what kink or lifestyle..

the only reason guys stand out is because of the sheer volume if there where as many women or others the % would level out... so thick skin is needed plus use the tools provided ie block block and then block some more then the abuse fizzles away

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By *entleman JayMan
2 weeks ago

Wakefield

I’m seeing more and more status updates from women, complaining about rude, lying and untrustworthy men.

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By *ondiego85Man
2 weeks ago

nottingham

"Being on this site has shown me some men on here are fucking nuts 😂😂😂 hearing more and more horror stories "

I actually do. And these nutters give the good men a bad name!

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By *ealitybitesMan
2 weeks ago

Belfast

"Being on this site has shown me some men on here are fucking nuts 😂😂😂 hearing more and more horror stories

I actually do. And these nutters give the good men a bad name!"

No they don't. They do the exact opposite and allow the "good" to stand out more

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By *ealitybitesMan
2 weeks ago

Belfast

"I’m seeing more and more status updates from women, complaining about rude, lying and untrustworthy men. "

As I've said above, you shouldn't take status updates at face value. Many of them are there for their reactionary value and many are complaining about issues that have very simple solutions.

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By *isexualrugbyguyMan
2 weeks ago

Cardiff

Not in the slightest! They have hundreds of messages a week, a huge choice of multiple guys and basically ignoring 95% of the rest. Due to this is feel a lot (not all) of below average women get a massive sense of self entitlement and feel that they’re above most men. In reality, most of these guys wouldn’t even notice, let alone look twice at them.

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By *ustBoWoman
2 weeks ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

Nope don't feel sorry for them at all. A lot of those who complain do nothing to stop the influx of messages and then cry wolf about being inundated and how terrible it is when they can actually do things to help themselves.

Even with filters you can get abuse but personally I have found it to be very rarely and I just delete it and don't give that person another thought. I can't remember the last time I got abusive messages though. Probably because I have filters tighter than a ducks ass.

As for the old cliché that the rude men give good guys a bad name. Sorry, but they don't and in fact the opposite is true they make the decent men stand out more.

It's not just men who are rude either.

So no,I don't feel sorry for women on here in general and I don't understand why men would feel that way either.

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By *lossomTreeWoman
2 weeks ago

Ipswich

"I also know of a guy who last year targeted abuse at a particular woman across different areas of Fab, he had some privileges removed but again the account remained.

You won't know what action admin took. "

I was told what had happened second hand, and it tallied with what I saw that guy do next on Fab.

I'm unsure how that person knew what the report outcome was.

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By *naswingdressWoman
2 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Not in the slightest! They have hundreds of messages a week, a huge choice of multiple guys and basically ignoring 95% of the rest. Due to this is feel a lot (not all) of below average women get a massive sense of self entitlement and feel that they’re above most men. In reality, most of these guys wouldn’t even notice, let alone look twice at them. "

When 95% of the messages are "hi" "wuu2" "cum suk me now", an address and a time slot, or other... somewhere between spam and detritus - there's good reason to ignore them.

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