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Sub Dom questions

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By *ighlander_24 OP   Man
6 weeks ago

Glasgow

I see people on here looking for an "experienced Dom" and that they're "sub leaning switch" and a "brat" and all this kind of lingo like it's an official thing! So I grew up in a small town so forgive my ignorance but do you gain all these titles in a swinging club scene or do you just decide you are one with your partner then advertise it 🤣 I consider myself to be pretty in touch with most things sexual, then I discovered fab and doubt myself sometimes lol. Would love to hear people's take on it or own experience

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By *lice AgainTV/TS
6 weeks ago

Bristol

It's just a shorthand for describing what you're into.

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By *emorefridaCouple
6 weeks ago

La la land

It's just how someone identifies, in order to find compatible people. Makes life a bit easier e.g. Some Doms don't like brats so may avoid profiles that have that identifier on it.

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By *ighlander_24 OP   Man
6 weeks ago

Glasgow


"It's just how someone identifies, in order to find compatible people. Makes life a bit easier e.g. Some Doms don't like brats so may avoid profiles that have that identifier on it. "

That makes sense. Thankyou

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By *ogerroger69Man
6 weeks ago

West Yorks

Bring Sub is huge release from everyday life x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
6 weeks ago

East Sussex

People decide. It's a shorthand way of describing what they're in to.

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By *inkedKuntsCouple
6 weeks ago

Sheffield

Basically you want to know most of the history of BDSM here lol that could be quite a post bud! (Its not a swinging thing though it has some cross over)

But the long and short of it is as above, it helps people identify what others are in too but that list is massive, Dom, Master, Owner, Top, Pleasure Dom, Sadist, FinDom, Daddy Dom, just to name a few! Then you have part time players, lifestylers, bed room kinksters, so many subsets!!

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By *r and Mrs SexploitCouple
6 weeks ago

Pontypridd

Google is your friend

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By *melia DominaTV/TS
6 weeks ago

Edinburgh (She/Her)

Goggle Urban dictionary for terms you don't know.

Generally it goes something like;

Dom - masculine, Domme - feminine

Dom, Domme, Dominant, top - leaders, guidance, correctional and controlling individual in a relationship or play session.

SUB - submissive, bottom - followers, learners, wish to be lead, controlled, guided and corrected in a relationship of play session.

Switch - swaps between Dom/Sub

Brat - subset of submissive. They basically like taunt Dominants to into action.

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By *ighlander_24 OP   Man
6 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Goggle Urban dictionary for terms you don't know.

Generally it goes something like;

Dom - masculine, Domme - feminine

Dom, Domme, Dominant, top - leaders, guidance, correctional and controlling individual in a relationship or play session.

SUB - submissive, bottom - followers, learners, wish to be lead, controlled, guided and corrected in a relationship of play session.

Switch - swaps between Dom/Sub

Brat - subset of submissive. They basically like taunt Dominants to into action.

"

Thanks guys it feels like a bit of a stupid question now. Where's that delete button. Oh there isn't one. Oh well Roll with the punches 🙄

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By *emorefridaCouple
6 weeks ago

La la land


"Goggle Urban dictionary for terms you don't know.

Generally it goes something like;

Dom - masculine, Domme - feminine

Dom, Domme, Dominant, top - leaders, guidance, correctional and controlling individual in a relationship or play session.

SUB - submissive, bottom - followers, learners, wish to be lead, controlled, guided and corrected in a relationship of play session.

Switch - swaps between Dom/Sub

Brat - subset of submissive. They basically like taunt Dominants to into action.

Thanks guys it feels like a bit of a stupid question now. Where's that delete button. Oh there isn't one. Oh well Roll with the punches 🙄 "

Nah it's not a stupid question at all. Took me ages to figure out all the nuances to how people identify themselves in BDSM. Though I think sometimes these terms are used in a swinging context instead of BDSM, so caution is always a good idea when approaching people on here. If in doubt ask them for clarification

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
6 weeks ago

East Sussex

^^ questions like this aren't stupid.

I suspect a lot of people will have learned something from your post

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By *ighlander_24 OP   Man
6 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Goggle Urban dictionary for terms you don't know.

Generally it goes something like;

Dom - masculine, Domme - feminine

Dom, Domme, Dominant, top - leaders, guidance, correctional and controlling individual in a relationship or play session.

SUB - submissive, bottom - followers, learners, wish to be lead, controlled, guided and corrected in a relationship of play session.

Switch - swaps between Dom/Sub

Brat - subset of submissive. They basically like taunt Dominants to into action.

Thanks guys it feels like a bit of a stupid question now. Where's that delete button. Oh there isn't one. Oh well Roll with the punches 🙄

Nah it's not a stupid question at all. Took me ages to figure out all the nuances to how people identify themselves in BDSM. Though I think sometimes these terms are used in a swinging context instead of BDSM, so caution is always a good idea when approaching people on here. If in doubt ask them for clarification "

Cheers like you said I think I need to study the world of bdsm to get understanding of all the terms. People use them confidently and I just wondered if there was more too it in the cities in the clubs ect. But it's just a way of identifying your traits ect. Understood. Thanks alot

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By *ighlander_24 OP   Man
6 weeks ago

Glasgow


"^^ questions like this aren't stupid.

I suspect a lot of people will have learned something from your post "

Thankyou. I hope so

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By *ensualMan
6 weeks ago

Sutton


"Goggle Urban dictionary for terms you don't know.

Generally it goes something like;

Dom - masculine, Domme - feminine

Dom, Domme, Dominant, top - leaders, guidance, correctional and controlling individual in a relationship or play session.

SUB - submissive, bottom - followers, learners, wish to be lead, controlled, guided and corrected in a relationship of play session.

Switch - swaps between Dom/Sub

Brat - subset of submissive. They basically like taunt Dominants to into action.

Thanks guys it feels like a bit of a stupid question now. Where's that delete button. Oh there isn't one. Oh well Roll with the punches 🙄

Nah it's not a stupid question at all. Took me ages to figure out all the nuances to how people identify themselves in BDSM. Though I think sometimes these terms are used in a swinging context instead of BDSM, so caution is always a good idea when approaching people on here. If in doubt ask them for clarification "

This, always ask others may want to ask the same question but are afraid of appearing stupid. There is a difference between a genuine enquiry like yours and rudeness masquerading as a question.

I would add some other points.

Different people use Bdsm terms differently.

Meanings can change over a short time and new labels are added.

There are people who hate labels and will be akward if you ask for a label.

Therefore, if the social setting permits, and your relationship to the person permits, always politely ask if they are willing to give details of their orientation. It is best never to assume.

Getting educated about BDSM from sources other than porn is always good.

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By *melia DominaTV/TS
5 weeks ago

Edinburgh (She/Her)

No questions are stupid questions..

Reaching out to find about any topic in the world of swinging or bdsm shows a willingness to learn and understand. Stands you in good stead and shows you are willing to expand and grow. That's a good thing.

Prospective partners will recognise the efforts made.

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By *sLillyMrWolfeCouple
5 weeks ago

near you...


"I see people on here looking for an "experienced Dom" and that they're "sub leaning switch" and a "brat" and all this kind of lingo like it's an official thing! So I grew up in a small town so forgive my ignorance but do you gain all these titles in a swinging club scene or do you just decide you are one with your partner then advertise it 🤣 I consider myself to be pretty in touch with most things sexual, then I discovered fab and doubt myself sometimes lol. Would love to hear people's take on it or own experience "

Too many men here think they are both experienced and a dom and couldn't be further from the truth. It's getting to the stage where saying that you're one is a sure sign you're not. Lx

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By *ighlander_24 OP   Man
5 weeks ago

Glasgow


"

Too many men here think they are both experienced and a dom and couldn't be further from the truth. It's getting to the stage where saying that you're one is a sure sign you're not. Lx"

This is interesting. This is the kind of thing that made me ask the question in the first place. Its obviously something some people take seriously and you can't just rock up calling yourself a Dom because your quite dominant. I'll need to research it lol. Thanks

Thanks to everyone else that's replied too

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