FabSwingers.com forum: Has it become harder to meet couples and singles on here

By *jlondon78 OP Man
35 weeks ago

Suffolk

Has it become harder to arrange and have meetings on here or are users more selective these days.

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By *airlessgentMan
35 weeks ago

southampton

"Has it become harder to arrange and have meetings on here or are users more selective these days.

Bit of both i think

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By *jlondon78 OP Man
35 weeks ago

Suffolk

Iam sure it seems to be that way

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By *exxyyDy11Man
35 weeks ago

North West

Both I imagine. Sometimes I wonder why I bother sending off messages to couples or women, most get ignored or unread.

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

"Both I imagine. Sometimes I wonder why I bother sending off messages to couples or women, most get ignored or unread. "

This site isn't what it use to be im afraid, I often say there's 1000 guys to every girl

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By *obert RichardsMan
35 weeks ago

Here nearby

Very hard in London, loads of profiles though x

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By *outhstaffscoupleCouple
35 weeks ago

cannock

We've been about 6 months, had 3 meets and 2 club visits, we're pretty happy with that to be honest, any more often would be too much for us

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By *exxyyDy11Man
35 weeks ago

North West

"Both I imagine. Sometimes I wonder why I bother sending off messages to couples or women, most get ignored or unread.

This site isn't what it use to be im afraid, I often say there's 1000 guys to every girl "

Yeah true. I'm a drop in the ocean

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

Women and couples get loads of messages where people haven't read their profiles and don't match. Most of us only use this to keep in touch with friends or to look out for events at clubs.

It's awful being on here as a couple or fem sometimes.

Numbers game I guess

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By *exxyyDy11Man
35 weeks ago

North West

"Women and couples get loads of messages where people haven't read their profiles and don't match. Most of us only use this to keep in touch with friends or to look out for events at clubs.

It's awful being on here as a couple or fem sometimes.

Numbers game I guess "

Yeah you're right. The behaviour of so many single guys have ruined it for the rest of us.

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By *jlondon78 OP Man
35 weeks ago

Suffolk

I can imagine that it's a constant bombardment but yet as a single male reading profiles and respectfully responding to there status or looking for it can be a negative affect when you are ghosted. Even worse when they view you and view more then once in a 24hur period only to find there profile is not avaliable.

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By *herrybakewellCouple
35 weeks ago

Staffordshire

[Removed by poster at 11/11/24 20:09:58]

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By *herrybakewellCouple
35 weeks ago

Staffordshire

It does feel harder lately, but maybe we're just getting cynical from all the time wasters lately.

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

Blame covid. Went tit's up during lockdown!

If u match what we have in our bio then we will always reply even if it's a no. If someone clearly hasn't read or ignored we will just delete

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By *exibbwCouple
35 weeks ago

hoddesdon

We have so many messages from single guys that just put no effort in (hey,hi,fancy meeting) we ain’t that easy nor do they read our profile it dose get very boring at times x

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By *jlondon78 OP Man
35 weeks ago

Suffolk

I totally agree with that it separates the genuine from the idiots.

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By *exxyyDy11Man
35 weeks ago

North West

"Blame covid. Went tit's up during lockdown!

If u match what we have in our bio then we will always reply even if it's a no. If someone clearly hasn't read or ignored we will just delete "

More single guys joined after covid? Damn I should have joined this site a while ago

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By *jlondon78 OP Man
35 weeks ago

Suffolk

What ever happened to being able ro communicate with people even if you are not what they sexualy desire isn't this site about networking and socially living this lifestyle what ever your into .

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

ive been here since the beginning and other sites before fab and ive always been very selective i think most couples and women are some guys are too but most will fuck anything thats wet and accommodates dick

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

"What ever happened to being able ro communicate with people even if you are not what they sexualy desire isn't this site about networking and socially living this lifestyle what ever your into . "

It's whatever people want it to be, some want a social experience, others don't. The point is making sure you meet what they ask, it goes a long long way.

We for example say repeatedly to not message unless you meet what we are after, yet people still message anyway. It's annoying when they do as we get 100s of messages a day and 99.99% of them clearly don't match.

It's a waste of time for many because of it and it's why most of the time we delete messages without even reading them.

Your view towards such is part of the problem.

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By *jlondon78 OP Man
35 weeks ago

Suffolk

Dually noted

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

Yeah you're right. The behaviour of so many single guys have ruined it for the rest of us. "

no they ruin it for themselves and no one else you are responsible for your self that includes getting nowhere ...stop trying to blame others for your downfalls

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By *ony MannMan
35 weeks ago

South Newton

It's not what it was, but it has changed several times since I joined. Sometimes for the better sometimes not so good.

I've found someone wonderful.

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By *exxyyDy11Man
35 weeks ago

North West

Yeah you're right. The behaviour of so many single guys have ruined it for the rest of us.

no they ruin it for themselves and no one else you are responsible for your self that includes getting nowhere ...stop trying to blame others for your downfalls"

I would agree apart from the fact that a lot of couples and women have stopped seeing single guys due to the behaviour of so many who don't read bios and don't take no for an answer. Which I don't blame at all. If I was part of a couple I'd probably do the same. And so yes, I will blame these clowns for making it difficult for the rest of us.

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By *eltic connectionCouple
35 weeks ago

Manningtree

You have to remember, when the site started it was about couples meeting up with other couples. Over the years it has become swamped with single men desperate to meet anyone! It can't be any surprise that single men struggle when the numbers are completely against them. The only ones who get meets are the ones who put the effort in, read the profile they are messaging rather than just looking at the photos and don't stint on what they write! One line or even one word messages will get you nowhere.

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By *jlondon78 OP Man
35 weeks ago

Suffolk

Agree but even we'll written non intrusive messages can still end up in the same situation not 5 minutes ago where they look at you read your message then block its a bit rude a simple no thanks would be acceptable and less damaging

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By *illbe9999Man
35 weeks ago

Holmfirth

I've been on here for 8 years now and always enjoyed a reasonable amount of success.

It's like applying for a job...if you apply to every job with the same letter and text without even reading the job advert, you are not getting anywhere.

Take the time to read their profile (yes it is an advert) and tailor your first contact appropriately.

Or you can try the scatter gun approach and send then same message to everyone...see if it works...

Go to socials...go to clubs...its the best way

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By *eltic connectionCouple
35 weeks ago

Manningtree

It does come across as rude. When we started this profile, we didn't block single men, we got over 300 messages in one day! There was no way we could reply to them all! Unfortunately it was a case of changing our settings and a bulk delete. Now if want to meet a single man we use a club or social event.

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By *urvykat and JayCouple
35 weeks ago

Ashbourne

We primarily joined as the majority of club goers you speak too are on here. The amount of times we were asked are you on fab ?

Kat was initially reluctant to sign up but we did to keep in touch with people we have previously met in person.

We’re not going to lie it’s much easier to meet guys on here as opposed to a couple.

It’s not difficult to see why.

Unfortunately the site is littered with time wasters but we are thick skinned and come to expect it.

It’s the good folk that make it worthwhile otherwise we would have been gone long ago.

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

"Agree but even we'll written non intrusive messages can still end up in the same situation not 5 minutes ago where they look at you read your message then block its a bit rude a simple no thanks would be acceptable and less damaging "

No one owes anyone anything and it's everyone's prerogative in how they use the site.

It's impossible to reply to everyone. On top most people can't take no so blocking is key, most simply use it as a filter. If you were blocked it was never meant to be.

The quicker people understand this the better.

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By *jlondon78 OP Man
35 weeks ago

Suffolk

I know time wasters are a issue it's like at the clubs when you get the lurkers its a lot of people who have no real interest in this lifestyle

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By *Silver-Man
35 weeks ago

North Wales

I'm happy with one -two meets every 6-8 wks

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

No one owes anyone anything and it's everyone's prerogative in how they use the site.

It's impossible to reply to everyone. On top most people can't take no so blocking is key, most simply use it as a filter. If you were blocked it was never meant to be.

The quicker people understand this the better. "

this 100%

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By *allySlinkyWoman
35 weeks ago

Leeds

"I know time wasters are a issue it's like at the clubs when you get the lurkers its a lot of people who have no real interest in this lifestyle

If I see a single man at a club, not playing with anyone, how do I tell if he is a "lurker" or a man "with real interest in this lifestyle " ?

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By *nlil and NinlilCouple
35 weeks ago

walsall

"What ever happened to being able ro communicate with people even if you are not what they sexualy desire isn't this site about networking and socially living this lifestyle what ever your into . "

you say this but have other males blocked

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

It is hard but then there is alot a shit Ton of guys to compete against.

Just gotta stand out as much as you can in a good way

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By *jlondon78 OP Man
35 weeks ago

Suffolk

"I know time wasters are a issue it's like at the clubs when you get the lurkers its a lot of people who have no real interest in this lifestyle

If I see a single man at a club, not playing with anyone, how do I tell if he is a "lurker" or a man "with real interest in this lifestyle " ?"
genuine will talk engage in conversation

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By *eltic connectionCouple
35 weeks ago

Manningtree

Op you'll get to meet loads of people when you come to the Suffolk Socials event next Friday. There are over 100 on the guest list and more being added each day. That's the best way to get yourself noticed and to get others chatting to you.

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By *urreyphotographerMan
35 weeks ago

kt16

I can't really say if it's changed or got harder as I've only been here for a year.

I've met some wonderful people and ladies and have had a lot of fun in the last 12 months

There's also a LOT of dreamers on here too, couples ( I suspect it's a guy ) and women . Been ghosted a lot.

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By *andystick72Man
35 weeks ago

kinky Street

Never had a problem really with fab and the club

(Chameleons)

If you know

You know

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

Yes it’s hard trying to find someone on here

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By *ootyfruityCouple
35 weeks ago

andover

Tbh we’ve given up on actively seeking the right single guy, it’s hard to find someone we are both attracted to and that actually reads our profile 😞

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By *ohnjones3210Man
35 weeks ago

Chester

I'm back here after 5 years away. I've only been back for 2 weeks, but so far I'm thinking that the "industry" is in an even bigger mess than it was back then.

The swinging scene in the UK has always had a massive lack of women, and in my opinion, this is the str**glehold that keeps the scene from securing investment (gay market excluded).

To be fair to fab, it's still free. The silver membership is still good value, although I can see that very little has been done in terms of investment. Of course though, fab is not a charity - it's here to make money and you don't invest if you don't think it's worth it.

As regards clientele, in my local area, taking a rough sample, the ratio of women to other entities is 4:64, which is of course 1:16 which is actually an improvement on the ratios 5 years ago that were around 1:35 or so.

Regarding messages, I've only sent around 20 so far, but I've got 14 responses, and this is hugely better than 5 years ago.

In other words; the club scene may have gone downhill. Fab seems to have stayed the same. The amount of sexual women in my area (and possibly the UK?) seems to have increased. The chances of me finding someone on here I'd say has improved.

It's easy days, but we'll see.

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

"Tbh we’ve given up on actively seeking the right single guy, it’s hard to find someone we are both attracted to and that actually reads our profile 😞"

You expected people to read?!

Wow you have high hopes! Haha

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By *ootyfruityCouple
35 weeks ago

andover

"Tbh we’ve given up on actively seeking the right single guy, it’s hard to find someone we are both attracted to and that actually reads our profile 😞

You expected people to read?!

Wow you have high hopes! Haha

We can live and hope can’t we! 😂

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By *olinOfBathMan
35 weeks ago

Corsham

"I know time wasters are a issue it's like at the clubs when you get the lurkers its a lot of people who have no real interest in this lifestyle

If I see a single man at a club, not playing with anyone, how do I tell if he is a "lurker" or a man "with real interest in this lifestyle " ?"

If it isn't me, he's a lurker.

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

"Blame covid. Went tit's up during lockdown!

If u match what we have in our bio then we will always reply even if it's a no. If someone clearly hasn't read or ignored we will just delete "

I noticed this too. It was still hard work pre covid but managed a few chats and meets , but now ... forget it. Stopped trying as even getting a message read was rare. It's certainly a numbers game too , but also a general raising of standards across the whole online dating scene too.

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By (user no longer on site)
35 weeks ago

With time the popularity of the site increases and plus not sure if there aren’t too many good alternatives to Fabs anyway so it is the sheer number of people… having said that, effort and originality will eventually stand out. We get ignored by many couples and singles ourselves but we live in the eternal hope nevertheless

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By *as1098Man
35 weeks ago

Sevenoaks

That's because there's a lot of people who aren't swingers on here..... they are doing it to create their own content or are doing it for other financial reasons.

Bet that above sentence earns me a ban...... hey admin?

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