FabSwingers.com forum: Unlikely porn quotes

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

Highly unlikely to be heard in a porn film:

No no, I'd rather not cum in your mouth or on your face

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

"Cum with me if you wanna live"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lofeldMan
43 weeks ago

Redhill

What do you think about the pedestrianisation of Norwich city centre?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

""Cum with me if you wanna live""

I bet that's been said, lol. They're always making porn spoofs of popular Hollywood films. For example Saving Ryan's Privates etc, so wouldn't be surprised if they'd made one of Terminator....probably called Cuminator or something.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

No thank you, I can fix my own washing machine.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aomilatteCouple
43 weeks ago

Midlands

Non of us have done any sniffing before filming, nor will we be sniffing after.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *en_Dover79Man
43 weeks ago

Oswaldtwistle

""Cum with me if you wanna live"

Star Whores is good

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *abluesbabyMan
43 weeks ago

Gibraltar/Cheshire/London

"Marry me?"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ichtingleMan
43 weeks ago

Manchester City Centre

Soz. No can do. Time of the month innit? Plus I've got the shits

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ark.aitkenMan
43 weeks ago

Newcastle

"Non of us have done any sniffing before filming, nor will we be sniffing after."

How about "I'll be (bare) back".

Some of them write themselves though

"Rosebud"

"Come up and see me some time"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bboredguyMan
43 weeks ago

montrose

Have you got anything smaller ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ersona101Man
43 weeks ago

Letchworth

The guys says, "Actually, I just want to cuddle."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *assion8Man
43 weeks ago

Glasgow

"Not today, I have a headache"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hank you sirMan
43 weeks ago

colchester

Casting couch scenario "please, just put your bra back on and read from the script, ok from the top"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rettyboylloydMan
43 weeks ago

Manchester

"Hang on a sec! You're not my step-mother!"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *moothdickMan
43 weeks ago

stoke

What u doing here?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

"No thank you, I can fix my own washing machine. "

Ah, a fan of the classic 70's

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

"Casting couch scenario "please, just put your bra back on and read from the script, ok from the top" "

"No really, we're casting for a real movie and no we will not be recording the audition"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *napppaMan
43 weeks ago

London

Just hand over that Pizza and piss off!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

""Hang on a sec! You're not my step-mother!""

You are joking! Are you telling me that....? Surely they wouldn't be making it up. Oh mate you have just ruined my day

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *artorialMan
43 weeks ago

weymouth

I ordered veggie pizza not meat feast 🥴

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ekked JackMan
43 weeks ago

South Lanarkshire

The photocopier works fine.

I'll just close the curtains and get dressed before the window cleaner arrives.

If you go down Pitt street it's quicker and I'd rather pay with cash Mr Taxi driver.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *r imp miss minxCouple
43 weeks ago

Colchester

Does it have to come with cheese?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Please can we just play chess

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *assion8Man
43 weeks ago

Glasgow

"Hurry up and clean the room so I can have a wank"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

I am NOT going down there. Smells like a fish supper.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rimals at PlayCouple
43 weeks ago

Manchester

No no, I understand all of the homework assigned and will not need a physical demonstration

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lovetoowatchMan
43 weeks ago

Sheffield

Im telling you sex between siblings is a no go

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

Why is the babysitter at my home when there no child in the house to look after?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Is this how you fuck mommy daddy?

If it is no wonder she left you. You’re shit and I didn’t cum once

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

"Is this how you fuck mommy daddy?

If it is no wonder she left you. You’re shit and I didn’t cum once

Wow, that's harsh! Lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ondiego85Man
43 weeks ago

nottingham

“I won’t shag my stepsister/stepson/stepmother”

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

Wife says "No I am not going to JOIN IN now that I've caught you fucking my best friend"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Silver FuxMan
43 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

“Yes actually, I do mind if the babysitter joins us”

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Turn that camera off until we are finished!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ea wangMan
43 weeks ago

scunthorpe

Sorry but my windows don't need cleaning and I won't be naked doing the housework

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lueman3Man
43 weeks ago

North east

No it’s wrong you know we can’t have sex. You’re my step ladder it would bring new heights of wrongness

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Oh my God, I'm calling the police. I can't believe you were watching me through the window

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *pslad99Man
43 weeks ago

pinewood

Going to need a bigger pussy(jaws)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *owdenguyMan
43 weeks ago

howden

No thank you sister

What would mum and dad say if they caught us?

You need help

I’m off

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rchitectMan
43 weeks ago

Dorchester

Is it in yet, I can’t feel it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Silver FuxMan
43 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

“Oh no, all you muscular men with massive hard cocks that have walked into my lounge and have surrounded the couch, absolutely not, shoo, off you go, Catchphrase is about to start”

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *unmatt888Man
43 weeks ago

Duns

“OK, see the issue here is that there’s a bearing behind the main drum of your washing machine that’s badly worn; it’s binding and overheating the motor and that’s why it keeps stopping.

I can order the part and fit it next week; at the risk of being rude could you wear more than a towel next time? It’s a bit inappropriate if you’re expecting someone.”

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *unning onCouple
43 weeks ago

leatherhead

"Oh no it's fine, cum dodging is allowed!"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aggy dollsCouple
43 weeks ago

bradford

Here's the bill for the leak repair.

Mr H

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Silver FuxMan
43 weeks ago

Uttoxeter

"“OK, see the issue here is that there’s a bearing behind the main drum of your washing machine that’s badly worn; it’s binding and overheating the motor and that’s why it keeps stopping.

I can order the part and fit it next week; at the risk of being rude could you wear more than a towel next time? It’s a bit inappropriate if you’re expecting someone.”"

I found this quite exciting 🔧 🤓

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
43 weeks ago

Central

We're nuns and staying celibate, God bless you, spawn of Satan

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

"I love you"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Sorry, I need paying in cash for this pizza otherwise my manager is going to dock my wages.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rnortholtMan
43 weeks ago

Waveney Valley & London

Dear reader, I married him.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

"I think I'd rather just pay the £10 fare thanks"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *issolvedOrdersMan
43 weeks ago

Bristol

Why is he actually fixing the fridge?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

You're all bloody hilarious. Love them!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

""Oh no it's fine, cum dodging is allowed!" "

Lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
43 weeks ago

London

What the fuck?! Oh for fucks sake, thats a new sofa and your squirts are gonna stain it now.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ondiego85Man
43 weeks ago

nottingham

“It’s fine, really, I CAN pay my taxi fare, no need to resort to sexual payments”

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sleWightCoupleCouple
43 weeks ago

Ryde

"Look, my cat just died, and I'm really not in the mood for any of that stuff".

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Look my boss said he'll sack me if I return with no money again.

Can you please just pay me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sleWightCoupleCouple
43 weeks ago

Ryde

"No, people never mistake us for sisters, as I'm clearly too old to be anything but her mother".

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ShyButNotShyCouple
43 weeks ago

Stoke-on-trent

I'll be honest, I'm dead against it!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ir SupremacyMan
43 weeks ago

Bolton

The buns are in the oven darling.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *idlandiaMan
43 weeks ago

Birmingham

Stop undressing, this is a taxi!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *idlandiaMan
43 weeks ago

Birmingham

I don't think this is a real hospital, there's cameras everywhere and that is a toy stethoscope. I'm off

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *erry bull1Man
43 weeks ago

doncaster

Let’s do it in the kitchen

I want to boil a egg

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *onjoliveMan
43 weeks ago

bournemouth

“Ooh fresh new sheets….zzzzzzz…..”

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
43 weeks ago

Not tonight. I've got an headache

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ampireLoveMan
43 weeks ago

Essex

“You were supposed to blow your load. Not the bloody doors off” !

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ondiego85Man
43 weeks ago

nottingham

“No, you can’t do my arse and THEN put it in my mouth!”

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *en_Dover79Man
43 weeks ago

Oswaldtwistle

I really should take these high heels off

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *illDoXXXMan
43 weeks ago

Preston

[Removed by poster at 26/09/24 22:14:35]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *illDoXXXMan
43 weeks ago

Preston

"What do you think about the pedestrianisation of Norwich city centre?"

Ahaa - Partridge porn !!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ave biMan
43 weeks ago

rugby

Can I dress up as Spock

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
42 weeks ago

London

Could we not do anal because last night's curry was really hot and my arsehole is taking a toll from that alone, so your meat shaft is just going to aggravate that situation.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ampire69Man
42 weeks ago

Birmingham West Midlands

Just like a cock only smaller ha ha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
38 weeks ago

London

Oh you look way too young to be along in a room with me and dressed in that school uniform I think that's pretty dodgy so no, I don't think I'll be giving you "private' lessons

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ady SuzieXXXWoman
38 weeks ago

Chichester

Are you in?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ungfunfellaMan
38 weeks ago

Lincoln

No you don’t get a discount on my bill if you suck my dick

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy69 OP Man
38 weeks ago

London

Can you please not use profanities. It's really offensive and off putting while I'm trying to make love to your flower with my wand.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *penminddmanMan
38 weeks ago

Lisburn

Sorry if this is a little late to notify everyone, but I have every STD known to humankind and perhaps a few yet to be discovered

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ortySwitchMan
38 weeks ago

london

"...i thought they smelt bad, on the , outside!"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *burns7Man
38 weeks ago

walsall

Don’t have money to pay for ride

Big Jon: right either get out or I’m calling police

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread