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Truthfulness

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By *oodlepot OP   Man
21 weeks ago

cheltenham

I had a conversation the other day about being truthful about yourself, and it got me thinking, if you was talking to a person/couple, would you turn down a meet because you feel you would be a disappointment to them, or would you go through with the meet, an be a disappointment for them, just so you have a release an tick a box off per say?,

Personally I for me, I would rather speak the truth an explain the reasons behind it an miss out on it, than be a disappointment for them an ruin their night, I'm just curious what people's thoughts are, (sorry if this doesn't make sense or it sounds stupid but it's been playing on my mind for a few days)

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By *asterMeliodasMan
21 weeks ago

Newmill


"I had a conversation the other day about being truthful about yourself, and it got me thinking, if you was talking to a person/couple, would you turn down a meet because you feel you would be a disappointment to them, or would you go through with the meet, an be a disappointment for them, just so you have a release an tick a box off per say?,

Personally I for me, I would rather speak the truth an explain the reasons behind it an miss out on it, than be a disappointment for them an ruin their night, I'm just curious what people's thoughts are, (sorry if this doesn't make sense or it sounds stupid but it's been playing on my mind for a few days)"

I think I understand where you're coming from, but I struggle to comprehend how you'd conclude you're going to be a disappointment before even doing anything. Like...if they've outlined specific expectations/requirements and you don't feel you fulfil them, wouldn't that in all likelihood have meant a potential meet was never on the cards in the first place? If a meet is being discussed, then clearly you're what they're looking for.

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By *oodlepot OP   Man
21 weeks ago

cheltenham

A meet was being discussed, between us, cause we both liked what we saw, and we ticked a few boxes of interests,etc, but I think it was the expectation/what they was looking for, and after I explained a bit about myself, I felt like I would disappoint them, it could be a lack of confidence on my end,

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By *asterMeliodasMan
21 weeks ago

Newmill


"A meet was being discussed, between us, cause we both liked what we saw, and we ticked a few boxes of interests,etc, but I think it was the expectation/what they was looking for, and after I explained a bit about myself, I felt like I would disappoint them, it could be a lack of confidence on my end, "

It sounds like that may be the case.

I suppose if you were having a confidence issue, it probably was for the best to be up front about that. It's unfortunate that you've potentially missed out on a wonderful experience because of that, though. Our brains can be awful to us sometimes, and tell the most nasty lies.

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By *partharmonyCouple
21 weeks ago

Ruislip

We look for compatibility before anything would happen. If we're compatible we'd think we would all have a good time.

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By *oodlepot OP   Man
21 weeks ago

cheltenham


"We look for compatibility before anything would happen. If we're compatible we'd think we would all have a good time."

I totally agree, that's what I am looking for myself, but again it's probably lack of confidence on my end,

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By (user no longer on site)
21 weeks ago

I'd openly tell them. I've always been a stickler for saying the truth. Consequences be damned...

It's come back to bite me more times than I can count.

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By (user no longer on site)
21 weeks ago


"I had a conversation the other day about being truthful about yourself, and it got me thinking, if you was talking to a person/couple, would you turn down a meet because you feel you would be a disappointment to them, or would you go through with the meet, an be a disappointment for them, just so you have a release an tick a box off per say?,

Personally I for me, I would rather speak the truth an explain the reasons behind it an miss out on it, than be a disappointment for them an ruin their night, I'm just curious what people's thoughts are, (sorry if this doesn't make sense or it sounds stupid but it's been playing on my mind for a few days)"

There's a couple of things at play here. Firstly, you're pre-supposing so.eth8ng you don't know and might be wrong about. Thus could be a confidence issue bond your part. Secondly, their happiness is t your responsibility.

I'd go through with the meet and try to be genuine and authentic. First times can often be awkward as you don't know the other people so any disappointment would be limited.

The only disappointment would be if you'd lied to get with them and it became obvious. 6 inches will never be 8 inches no matter how you measure it.

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