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what is swinging really all about?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

An old fwb who i haven t seen for a while today asked me if i fancied swinging as a couple with another couple.

It got me thinking what swinging is really all about.

As a couple, what does it add to your relationship? do you not have to have a strong emotional connection to.have some enjoyment out of it? what exactly turns you on about it? What do you get from.it?

if there isn t a strong emotional connection to your partner, is it not just a way of shagging other people but doing it openly?

do any of you swing with fb or fwb? is it the same experience as you d get with a couple in a committed relationship? are you attached to your fb/fwb?

would love to hear your views as a couple swingers, from both the female and male point of view

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well i have never gone swinging while part of a couple because my partners have never been interested,but for me i enjoy the social side just as much as the playing.There are no emotions because i will probably never see most of the people again but i get a thrill out of having sex with strangers in front of everyone.

I would love to find a fb to swing with but for now i am happy to go on my own and play to my rules.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its all about having fun, anticipation pre meet and meeting new friends or thats our slant ion swinging.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Its all about having fun, anticipation pre meet and meeting new friends or thats our slant ion swinging. "

is it a way to prevent the sex with your partner to become boring do you think?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it adds some spice to a bunch of mundane dishes

woof!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

yes i think i get it from the singles point of view...interested in couples views though which really is what swinging is originally about

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

what people get from swinging is as varied as swingers themselves. Even with couples each one will get something different from in addition to what they get as a couple.

I think it's best to do exactly what you want for your own reasons while being respectful and honest to other people

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I have a fwb/fb and we are by no means attatched, but just LOVE to see him with another woman.

There are no emotions between us, other than I look forward to seeing him, he's been my best sexual partner ever.

We keep it to meeting at a club and have never met beyond that, even just as friends.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No emotion needed for swinging,it is functional. Emotion is for your partner, loved one etc. Swinging is an extra excitement to our sex life, a spontaneous, exciting, sensual, dirty escapism that we mostly do together but always share. Guess we are just greedy feckers with a high sex drive

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I have a fwb/fb and we are by no means attatched, but just LOVE to see him with another woman.

There are no emotions between us, other than I look forward to seeing him, he's been my best sexual partner ever.

We keep it to meeting at a club and have never met beyond that, even just as friends."

ah maybe that s the thing with fb/fwb maybe enjoyed best if there s a strong sexual connection then. do u think you d enjoy it the same if you didn t have that?

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By *eekenderzCouple
over a year ago

London

It's fun! It's exciting! And I think it's not quite natural to have only one sexual partner for a life time. This way you can have all the thrills of the chase and the excitement of sex with different people without deceiving the person you love.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's fun! It's exciting! And I think it's not quite natural to have only one sexual partner for a life time. This way you can have all the thrills of the chase and the excitement of sex with different people without deceiving the person you love. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

so it is a way to ensure your sex life doesn t get boring then?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"so it is a way to ensure your sex life doesn t get boring then?"

For some people probably but why must there only be one reason that people do it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We do FFM's purely becuase we both like girls and tho we have an amazing time together - sometimes another F injects a bit of spice into an evening ... and as we both there to enjoy it works absolutely briliantly for us.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"so it is a way to ensure your sex life doesn t get boring then?

For some people probably but why must there only be one reason that people do it?"

not saying there should, just curious about what motivates people and whether this is something i could ever enjoy doing as a couple or with a fwb. i know when i was married there was no way i could have handled watching the man i loved doing it with another woman so wondered how come some people love it. guess it s very different with a fwb though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

“This is the truth: we all desire to conquer the comely one, because it affirms our own worth. Speaking for the men of the world, we want to own the beauty of the woman we're fucking. We want to grasp that beauty, tightly in our greedy little fingers, to well and truly possess it, to make it ours. We want to do this as the woman shines her way through an orgasm. That's perfection. And while I can't speak for women, I imagine that they-whether they admit it or not-want the same thing: to possess the man, to own his rough handsomeness, if only for a few seconds.”

and you get to meet lovely people along the journey x

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By *eekenderzCouple
over a year ago

London


"so it is a way to ensure your sex life doesn t get boring then?"

I see it more as spicing up life, rather than spicing up a boring sex life. Most swingers I have met didn't start because they were bored by their wife/husband - quite the opposite. They are adventurers, looking for new lands which they can discover together. And why not? If you feel really secure with your other half you have nothing to fear, just lots of fun to be had.

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By *ollie_JCouple
over a year ago

London

[Removed by poster at 11/03/13 20:22:14]

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By *evilwolfCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire


"so it is a way to ensure your sex life doesn t get boring then?

I see it more as spicing up life, rather than spicing up a boring sex life. Most swingers I have met didn't start because they were bored by their wife/husband - quite the opposite. They are adventurers, looking for new lands which they can discover together. And why not? If you feel really secure with your other half you have nothing to fear, just lots of fun to be had. "

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By *ollie_JCouple
over a year ago

London

This is going to sound harsh

If you don't understand, you don't get it

Or ....

As said above, we are different people but we are in love, always have been always will.

No secrets, we share our inner most thoughts and desires

We tell each other everything, we are one enjoying the world.

If I say god I want to stick my cock in her, then I can without hiding or wanking in shame

Same as Mrs H.. although hers are far more ak and sinister

We share porn URLs and laugh about profiles on here

It has taken sleeping with a few munters, muppets, frogs,wankers and psychos to meet each other but we have met, we have made a life long commitment and we have a ring on the finger..

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"so it is a way to ensure your sex life doesn t get boring then?

For some people probably but why must there only be one reason that people do it?

not saying there should, just curious about what motivates people and whether this is something i could ever enjoy doing as a couple or with a fwb. i know when i was married there was no way i could have handled watching the man i loved doing it with another woman so wondered how come some people love it. guess it s very different with a fwb though."

but someone else's motives are just that, someone elses. The only person who knows if you could swing with a fb is you surely.

Let me turn the question back on you, do you think you could swing with a fb and if so what would motivate you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

wow east mids, very envious of what you have!

I don t know Nicecouple, only just thought about it...i read many times on here that swinging (for couples) is a lifestyle and i got the feeling to swing successfully you needed to have a strong secure relationship so i think it d be a completely different ball game with a fwb. And hence i m trying to understand what swinging really is about.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

ps and really i opened this thread because i was interested to hear what swinging was really about, and people s views and motivation behind it as indeed i can make my own decision whether to try it out with a fwb

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By *andKxxxCouple
over a year ago

Liverpool

We are engaged to be married and have only just started swinging... We find it adds that little spark to our sex life (that is already pretty amazing) .... But our "vanilla" sex life is so more intense after we have been swinging!! We are a really close couple and very very happy!!! Xx

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"wow east mids, very envious of what you have!

I don t know Nicecouple, only just thought about it...i read many times on here that swinging (for couples) is a lifestyle and i got the feeling to swing successfully you needed to have a strong secure relationship so i think it d be a completely different ball game with a fwb. And hence i m trying to understand what swinging really is about."

Right, got it.

Yes you do need to have a very strong relationship to swing successfully as a couple in a relationship. With a fb I imagine that you would both be in it for yourselves only and that would affect the dynamic of a meet, as you wouldn't be spending a lot of time together I guess that boundaries and likes and dislikes wouldn't be as easy to establish and that emotional connection that makes the sex so special and the trust so deep would be missing.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"ps and really i opened this thread because i was interested to hear what swinging was really about, and people s views and motivation behind it as indeed i can make my own decision whether to try it out with a fwb "

Good!

You will never find out what swinging is really about

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Right, got it.

Yes you do need to have a very strong relationship to swing successfully as a couple in a relationship. With a fb I imagine that you would both be in it for yourselves only and that would affect the dynamic of a meet, as you wouldn't be spending a lot of time together I guess that boundaries and likes and dislikes wouldn't be as easy to establish and that emotional connection that makes the sex so special and the trust so deep would be missing. "

Ah just as i thought...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've met FB couples and it immediately shows and we've found the chemistry just isn't there. Both or one of them is just there to shag someone else. Is possibly cheating on their marital partner and it's very mechanical and by and large uninteresting. Just my thoughts and is why we've put on profile that we don't really like to meet fuck buddies.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

yup makes perfect sense!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is going to sound harsh

If you don't understand, you don't get it

Or ....

As said above, we are different people but we are in love, always have been always will.

No secrets, we share our inner most thoughts and desires

We tell each other everything, we are one enjoying the world.

If I say god I want to stick my cock in her, then I can without hiding or wanking in shame

Same as Mrs H.. although hers are far more ak and sinister

We share porn URLs and laugh about profiles on here

It has taken sleeping with a few munters, muppets, frogs,wankers and psychos to meet each other but we have met, we have made a life long commitment and we have a ring on the finger.."

Agree with that. For us it started as a fantasy, we did it, enjoyed it and still do it, for now..

Personally I don't think swinging can be done by singles - including people who 'couple up' in order to do it - that's just fucking. That's not a dig at singles because we enjoy playing with those too - but there's something different about enjoying seeing the person you love in the most erotic scenarios, and also the total honesty you can have as a result.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did have a profile with a FB, but we have since parted ways. We weren't a couple so there wasn't the emotional connection I would imagine you get in a relationship but I did care for him (perhaps a little more than I should have!!). I enjoyed swinging with him..watching him do things to women and knowing how it must feel to them, knowing he could see and hear me too...was just a shame we didn't get to play together as much as I would have liked. I would do it again though if I met someone I had that level of comfort and quality of sex with as I did enjoy it.

If I was to meet a 'proper' partner I think I would like to explore swinging with them too as I can only imagine that the enjoyment is even more intense, but I don't think I'd like us to play separately which wasn't an issue with my FB as he was never really 'mine' if that makes sense?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

hi, yes i guess it does....i m still a bit confused what enjoyment one gets seeing/hearing one s swinging partner pleasing someone else though ;(

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

when having sex,the sexual possibilities increase,with each added participant,both physical,and visual.

most people have a multitude of sexual fantasies,swinging gives the opportunity to fulfill them.

swinging when a loving couple,does not mean you love less,it shows you love more.

being part of a loving couple,should not end your sexual fantasies,it should be the catalyst on the road to fulfilling them.

good thread,some great pic ermm i mean profiles,have posted on it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"hi, yes i guess it does....i m still a bit confused what enjoyment one gets seeing/hearing one s swinging partner pleasing someone else though ;( "

In terms of a 'swinging partner' possibly not a great deal.

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By *ornieandhotCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

We love seeing each other with other people and enjoy giving pleasure to others

And when it's with a single he enjoys seeing me being pleasured by another guy or girl and what I'm doing for them and joining in of course hehe

D x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"hi, yes i guess it does....i m still a bit confused what enjoyment one gets seeing/hearing one s swinging partner pleasing someone else though ;(

In terms of a 'swinging partner' possibly not a great deal."

I got pleasure from it. Not for a second trying to imply it's the same as being in a relationship and sharing, but we had been playing together for some time and knew each other quite well. Just because he wasn't my fella it doesn't mean I couldn't enjoy having fun with him and exploring with him!

The only way you'll know if it's for you I guess is to try it once...maybe go to a club together and see what happens? No one in clubs ever suspected we weren't a couple and were always surprised when we told them our situation.

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